You might think a book about someone who works as a death doula would be a very sad book, but think again - because it’s not. Certainly there are some rather sad moments, but on the whole, The Collected Regrets of Clover is more uplifting than it is sad.

This amazing debut novel might be classified as a sort of delayed coming-of-age story. The main character, Clover, is in her mid-30s and is a pretty solitary person as the book opens. She was raised by her grandfather after her parents died when she was six years old. She and her grandfather grew very close over the years and after he dies (alone) suddenly while she is traveling overseas, she decides to become a death doula, to help other people. She’d already been fascinated with death rituals and traditions in various cultures, so this job seems perfect for her. She even records some of the things her “clients” tell her, in journals titled Regrets, Advice, and Confessions.

I loved Clover and sympathized with her. I got frustrated with her always hiding from the world - she’s never had a real friend or a boyfriend. She mainly socializes with an elderly neighbor, Leo, who has known her since she moved in with her grandfather. A new neighbor in their small apartment building coaxes Clover out of her shell a bit and a young man she meets at a “death cafe” (a new concept to me!) asks her to take on his dying grandmother as a client, which further leads Clover out of her shell.

I could really relate to how attached Clover was to her grandfather’s things. It’s hard to get rid of things when you have a sentimental attachment to them! My husband and I are going through some of the same issues right now, so Clover’s reluctance to part with his things rings true.

I bounced between the audiobook and the ebook for this title, which was very convenient. The audiobook was beautifully narrated by Jennifer Pickens.

Thank you to St. Martin’s Press and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an advance reader copy of this book and to Macmillan Audio and NetGalley for the opportunity to listen to an advance copy of this audiobook. All opinions are my own.

💐The Collected Regrets of Clover💐

Clover is a death doula living in NYC. While helping people through their end-of-life care, she’s forgotten how to live her own.

The Goodreads blurb said this was “for readers of The Midnight Library”, but I would say it’s more for fans of A Man Called Ove or Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine. Clover is a curmudgeon, lonely, possibly neurodivergent character. The story started out a bit slow, but I ultimately like where it went and I loved the surprise Maine references - Megunticook Lake, the Linconville Motel! I think I read the story at the wrong time as it wasn’t quite a home run for me, but I’ve seen a lot of glowing reviews!

Thank you @netgalley and @stmartinspress for the eARC of The Collected Regrets of Clover, it’s out tomorrow (May 9th)!

The Collected Regrets of Clover has a great premise — it’s about a death doula who, after years of supporting clients through their last days, challenges herself to address some of their final regrets, and maybe even her own.

For a book ostensibly about death, this was a very sweet and warm-hearted novel. I may not have been the best audience for this book— it was a bit too twee for me, and I had trouble accepting that a 36 year old woman who had such good people skills at work could possibly have no friends whatsoever. I think the author could have underscored Clover’s loneliness without using such extremes in her characterization; I think we all have experienced feeling lonely in a crowd.

However, I’ll admit that I feel a bit like the grinch criticizing this book, because it was very charming, with a lovely message, and I read it much faster than I anticipated.

Thank you to St Martin’s Press and Goodreads for the advanced readers copy. The Collected Regrets of Clover releases this Tuesday May 9th.

4.25⭐️

Mikki Brammer’s debut novel The Collected Regrets of Clover is a very honest and open story about death, grief, and what it means to live a fulfilled life. I recommend being mentally prepared for an emotional read, and don’t go in blind.🥹

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝:
💐Very thought-provoking read. I liked that this book made me think A LOT and explored death in a very open way. It touches on how different death is perceived and how it’s talked about (or not talked about) in families.

In addition, we learn about Clover’s relationship with her grandfather who passed away (this is in the synopsis)..and I really enjoyed how this was woven into the story, how Clover reflects on and applies his advice in certain situations.

💐The last 35% of the book was my favourite! The ending was so beautiful, and leaves the reader with hope and a new way of thinking… this one will definitely tug on all the heart strings, be prepared to shed a few tears.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐃𝐨𝐰𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞:
I struggled to get into this book.. It wasn’t until about 65% that it really started to grow on me. The progression is on the slower side and I didn’t love the writing style..HOWEVER😇 I am so glad that I pushed through (the ending was well worth it).

𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫:
✔ An introverted, bookish, death doula
✔ Heartwarming friendship, that leads to a cross country road trip
✔ Open conversation about death, cultural and familial differences
✔ A dash of romance
✔ Hope

Clover, a death doula, honors her clients' lives by recording their final words and then acting on their parting advice, confessions, and regrets. But her own life is narrow; she has few relationships and rarely leaves the apartment where she grew up, which she has kept unchanged since the grandfather who raised her died. When she befriends a new neighbor and becomes invested in the regrets of a client, Clover begins to step out of her shell and to think about the life she is living rather than the deaths that have shaped it.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a thoughtful and uplifting book as well as a pleasant and engaging read. I worried that, with so much death at its center, the story would feel morbid or depressing, but the author did a wonderful job of describing the effect of grief on Clover's life without dwelling in it. I loved the well-developed secondary characters, especially feisty Claudia and her smarmy but sincere grandson, Sebastian. Even though their journeys aren't the central one of the novel, I invested in their arcs. And even minor characters, like Clover's across-the-air-shaft neighbors, are painted so vividly in just a few sentences that they leave an indelible mark on the story.

However, I thought the characterization of Clover herself needed more development. Beyond the deaths that have shaped her, we don't see much of who she is. We understand that she isn't truly fulfilled but, still, her hours must be filled with something. I think a closer look at this "something" would have helped me see Clover more vividly and empathize with her better, and a better understanding of her hopes and desires - and how they have been repressed or disappointed or ignored - would have helped me understand why her life was ripe for change, and why the events of the novel led to it.

4.5 stars, rounded up.

As soon as I began reading this novel, I knew that it was going to be special. I also knew that it was probably going to hurt, but what’s a good book if it doesn’t make you feel. Well, this book certainly made me feel. All I wanted to do was reach through my Kindle and give Clover a big hug.

Mikki Brammer’s debut novel touches on a subject that many of us prefer to ignore: death. Sure, we know it’s inevitable, but most of us prefer to keep our heads in the sand and not think about the end of our lives or those of our loved ones. The author deals with it in a very thought-provoking, heartfelt manner.

Clover Brooks has an unconventional job. As a death doula she provides end-of-love companionship to those about to die. From a very young age, she’d been confronted with death, and although she had always had a knack for dealing with people who were about to pass away, it often made her an outcast among her classmates. For Clover, holding the hand and comforting the dying in their final moments of life was a privilege and one that she didn’t take lightly.

Clover lived a quiet, lonely life. After her beloved grandfather died, the only connections she had were with a bookstore owner, her pets, a senior who lived in her apartment building, and the people who she was working for. She lived a very solitary life. It’s not that she didn’t want to have friends, find love, or get out in the world more, she just didn’t want to face rejection, disappointment, or abandonment.

My heart broke repeatedly for Clover. She was an interesting and unforgettable character. I wanted her to find happiness, contentment, friendships, and love. Living in New York City, it is easy to be swallowed up, but I didn’t want her to witness other people living their lives, I wanted her to get out of her comfort zone, get out there and live hers, too.

The Collected Regrets of Clover was a wonderful reading experience. I thoroughly enjoyed my time with Clover, the thoughtfulness of the story, and the abundance of hope that it provided. I will definitely be looking forward to reading the next novel by Mikki Brammer.

*4.5 Stars

Many thanks to NetGalley, St Martin's Press and Macmillan Audio for gifting me both a digital and audio ARC of this wonderful debut novel by Mikki Brammer, the audio beautifully narrated by Jennifer Pickens - 5 stars!

Clover has felt a strong connection with death ever since her kindergarten teacher died in front of her class. After her parents died, she was raised by her grandfather in his NYC apartment. She became a death doula, and was gifted at helping people through their end-of-life process, so much so that she didn't have a life of her own. Now 36, she lives in her deceased grandfather's apartment, no friends except an elderly neighbor, has never been kissed, and spends time visiting death cafes, where people talk about dying.

While you might think that a book about death and people dying would be grim and sad, this book is anything but. It's full of wonderful characters that come to life as you read. It's also a primer of how to best live your life. Clover kept notebooks of people's last words and organized them into the categories regrets, advice, confessions. In these regrets are lessons for living of which we should all take heed. Can't wait to read more from this author - highly recommended!

The Collected Regrets of Clover is the debut novel by Mikki Brammer about a death doula in NYC. Can a book about a death doula be uplifting? In this case, yes!

Clover lives in the apartment her now-deceased grandfather raised her in and keeps to herself. Her only friend is the 80-year-old neighbor she's known her whole life. Clover's job as a death doula is important and rewarding but takes a lot out of her emotionally. So when a new neighbor moves in and strikes up a friendship with Clover, and a feisty client pushes Clover to reassess her life, Clover is challenged on several levels and tries to figure out what she really wants for herself.

Honestly, I was a bit worried this would be a heavy and emotional book. And while the idea of death and dying is not an easy or comfortable topic, this book respectfully maintains a hopeful and life-affirming tone. Character-driven, it examines Clover's growth as she ensures a peaceful death for others while failing to celebrate her own life and maintaining distance from others. Clover has been dealing with the emotional aftermath of an event that changed everything for her and influenced her decision to become a death doula. There were some heartwarming and poignant scenes and some that made me think. (Before reading this, I wasn't even entirely sure what a death doula was.) The majority of the book, though, is about Clover, the things she must work through, and the new relationships she forges. Hopeful and lovingly written. Brammer is an author to watch!

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for the opportunity to review this ARC.

Clover’s life has been inundated with death since she was a child. Even her job deals with demise, but that may be changing. Sometimes we get in a comfortable rut and don’t want to be budged.
Clover needs the nudging of her friends to reassess her life and let go of some things.
Although death is a major theme, the book is also about growth. Growth for Clover as she expands her horizons and as she continues to travel, both physically and emotionally.

I feared the subject matter of this book in the early pages. It’s a book about a death doula, her life and her work and about loss and dying. And I was still grieving the loss of a life partner so had some significant trepidation. Instead, it is a glorious, thoughtful examination of the subject through a prism of a life being lived small as the doula examines her own grief and losses and considers the regrets and advice of those whom she helped support in their final days and hours. There is not one word wrong in the author’s depiction of how to emotionally support those whose lives head for imminent cessation. It is a beautiful evocative examination of a difficult topic handled with hope and affection and not in any sense morbid. Highly recommend.

The Collected Regrets of Clover by Mikki Brammer was extremely slow to capture my interest. Somewhere around 55 to 60% in, things started to click for me and my interest in the characters and story shifted. After her grandfather dies alone while she’s out of the country, Clover becomes a death doula to help others so they don’t die alone. She starts 3 journals, Advice, Confessions and Regrets, to help chronicle these deaths and the wisdom departed from the dying. She learns a lot of life lessons and what to do when she’s faced with her own regrets. Thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the ARC.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a contemporary fiction that is about Clover, a death doula that has preferred the company of the dying to the living. The last wish of a dying woman sends her on a trip across the country where Clover finds herself trying to figure out herself, romance and friendships.

While this could have easily been a morose story, I loved the uplifting way it navigated the hard topics of death, regrets and grief. As for Clover, she was a very guarded character and learning where that was coming from and seeing her open up was definitely rewarding. Her naiveté about all things life was a bit confusing as she had a deep understanding of her clients, but I still found the story heartwarming and interesting.

I thought this one worked well on audio, it has a relatively straightforward plot and smallish number of names and Jennifer Pickens' captured Clover's voice really well!

Thank you so much to St. Martin's Press for the gorgeous finished copy and Macmillan Audio for the ALC.

Clover is a 30-something death doula. Her parents died when she was six leaving her grandfather to raise her. He seemed like a great guy and gave her a lot of attention and taught her a lot. Clover was in college studying dying and while she was on a trip to Cambodia her grandfather passed away. She became a death doula so people wouldn't have to die alone. For most of the book I didn't like Clover. She did a good job leading people to a peaceful death but she had no idea how to live a full life and she seemed to go out of her way to push people away until a new neighbor, Sylvie, moved into the building. In a death cafe she met Sebastian who hired her to be with his grandmother, Claudia, who had pancreatic cancer. She finally took to heart some of the lessons she learned from the dying and became a lot more likeable.

I would like to thank Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for providing me with a digital copy.

From the day she watched her kindergarten teacher drop dead during a dramatic telling of Peter Rabbit, Clover Brooks has felt a stronger connection with the dying than she has with the living. Then when her parents die in a freak accident while on a trip, Clover is sent to live with the only living relative she has left....a grandfather she has only seen a handful of times. Clover and her grandfather live a happy and fulfilling, if not somewhat isolating, life. Clover goes off to college, and then travels to several different countries, studying the death and burial customs of each culture. While in Cambodia, her grandfather passes away, alone in his office at the university. To atone for not being there with him when he died, Clover decides to become a death doula. Clover spends so much time with the dying that she has no life of her own, until the final wishes of a feisty old woman send Clover on a trip across the country to uncover a forgotten love story––and perhaps, her own happy ending. As she finds herself struggling to navigate the uncharted roads of romance and friendship, Clover is forced to examine what she really wants, and whether she’ll have the courage to go after it.
This book was amazing. I smiled, I sobbed, I became disgusted with the way some people treated Clover because of her profession, and I silently cheered her on when she met the love of her life. This book is perfect for fans of Cecelia Ahern, Gail Honeyman, Matthew Haig, and Lucy Gilmore. I highly recommend it!

A touching and inspiring story of a woman who learns to live while helping others die. Brammer’s writing is graceful and compassionate.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Title: The Collected Regrets of Clover
Author: Mikki Brammer
Genre: Contemporary Fiction
Rating: 4.25
Pub Date: May 9, 2023

I received complimentary eARC and ALC copies of this book from St. Martin's Press and Macmillan Audio via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own. #Gifted #Ad

T H R E E • W O R D S

Distinctive • Endearing • Thoughtful

📖 S Y N O P S I S

From the day she watched her kindergarten teacher drop dead during a dramatic telling of Peter Rabbit, Clover Brooks has felt a stronger connection with the dying than she has with the living. After the beloved grandfather who raised her dies alone while she is traveling, Clover becomes a death doula in New York City, dedicating her life to ushering people peacefully through their end-of-life process.

Clover spends so much time with the dying that she has no life of her own, until the final wishes of a feisty old woman send Clover on a trip across the country to uncover a forgotten love story—and perhaps, her own happy ending. As she finds herself struggling to navigate the uncharted roads of romance and friendship, Clover is forced to examine what she really wants, and whether she’ll have the courage to go after it.

💭 T H O U G H T S

After reading the synopsis and learning Clover was a death doula, I knew The Collected Regrets of Clover was going to be a book for me. Books with open and compassionate dialogue around death and dying are a niche genre I gravitate towards because of my own personal experience with grief.

The Collected Regrets of Clover, Mikki Brammer's debut novel, is such a slow-paced, unique and enlightening novel. Clover is an incredibly relatable and introverted main character, as the story progresses her personal connection to and obsession with death is slowly revealed, which I thought was fascinating. It allowed me to reflect on what it would be like to have the immense privilege of being privy to people's last words.

One of my absolute favourite parts of the book was how Clover's Grandpa used the analogy of matches to explain life and death. Some matches fail to light, some burn out too soon, and some burn all the way down. It touches on how so many factors beyond our control can impact how a match burns. This analogy seemed so spot on and absolutely beautiful.

Despite loving so much about this novel, the reason it doesn't quite meet my 5-star criteria is because my attention did wane slightly around the 60% mark. There was so much building and unraveling on Clover's story that took time, but for me something shifted in the second half that didn't hold my attention like I wanted it to. The audiobook, narrated by Jennifer Pickens was very well done. It helped add a layer of emotion to my reading experience, and also helped me getting through that lull.

At the end of the day, The Collected Regrets of Clover is a book tackling the topic of death. Yet it does so in such a gentle way that it becomes so much more. It's a book about living, a book about time, a book about ageing. It's filled with so much inspiration of reflective moments. It's an uplifting read demonstrating how discomfort is a natural part of life, and a reminder to celebrate life because we just never know when our match will burn out.

📚 R E C O M M E N D • T O
• readers looking for a hug in book form
• fans of unlikely friendships

⚠️ CW: death, death of parent, grief, terminal illness, cancer, abandonment, infidelity, medical content, car accident, alcoholism, sexism

🔖 F A V O U R I T E • Q U O T E S

"Being denied the chance to say goodbye to a loved one left stubborn emotional scars."

"I don't think it's weird at all. Death is a natural part of life. In fact, it's the only thing in life that we can really count on."

"People who were complete strangers to me less than a year ago had forever shifted the trajectory of my life. The fact that all of us were entangled - that everyone on the planet somehow shaped the course of one another's lives, often without realizing it - felt like almost too much for me to comprehend.

But perhaps that's the point. Do we actually need to understand the world and all its patterns?

You can find meaning in anything if you look hard enough, if you want to believe that everything happens for a reason. But if we completely understood one another, if every event made sense, none of us would ever learn or grow. Our days might be pleasant, but prosaic.

So maybe we just need to appreciate that many aspects of life - and the people we love - will always be a mystery. Because without mystery, there is no magic.

And instead of constantly asking ourselves the question of why we're here, maybe we should be savoring a simpler truth: We are here"

From reading the jacket synopsis you will know this book is about a death doula - but it is important to know that there is a lot of death in the novel. Clover has her own unique superpowers to help people navigate those losses, however the deaths still weren’t easy to read about, especially reading about her childhood traumas. That all said, the book does lean toward the inspiring vs depressing.

Clover is her own kind of endearing quirky, and I love seeing various neurodivergent traits portrayed in independent individuals.

My absolute favorite part of the book was the conversation between Clover and her Grandpa where he uses the analogy of matches to discuss the length of life - some burn out too soon, some are broken before they even light, and some burn all the way with a full bright flame.

The Collected Regrets of Clover releases May 9, 2023. Thank you to Netgally and the publisher for providing access to a digital ARC in exchange for my honest review.

This is a book about grief, death, and living life fully. Clover is a death doula who guides people in the last days of their lives. As for her personal life, she doesn't have any friends except for an older neighbor. Clover's life is impacted when she becomes a death doula for Claudia, the grandmother of someone she met at a death cafe. This book was a bit slow in the beginning and through the middle, but the end picked up and it turned out to be a sweet story. It was worth getting to the end for the heart-warming message, but I didn't feel fully invested in Clover's story for much of the book.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
The Collected Regrets of Clover
Author: Mikki Brammer
Source: NetGalley ARC
Pub Date: May 9, 2023
🕯️
Clover is a young woman who knows a great deal about loss. Specifically, Clover lost her parents in a car accident, but she also lost out on experiencing parental love from an early age. As a young girl, death preoccupies her mind resulting in the loss of friends. It’s a creepy preoccupation. But most of all, it makes Clover hesitant to move forward in life. As a “Death Doula,” Clover develops a rare skill; she helps the dying meet their life’s end. But in helping those who pass on, she realizes that she needs to move on in her personal life as well. She needs to grow her living skills—an interesting book about a challenging topic. There’s a lot to learn from folks at death’s door. #Thecollectedregretsofclover #netgalley #MikkiBrammer #stmartinspress #womensfiction #generalfiction #life #death #future #hope #deathdoula #endoflife @stmartinspress @netgalley @mikkibrammer
🕯️
I received a complimentary copy of this ARC. The opinions expressed in this review are entirely my own. Thank you to St. Martin’s Press and the author for the opportunity to read this book. Pub. Date: May 9, 2023.
🕯️
#book #books #bookaddict #booksofinstagram #bookstagram #bookstagramer #bookshelf #booksbooksbooks #readersofinstagram #reader #booklove #bookreader #reader

Thank you to St. Martin's Press and NetGalley for this ARC.

Clover is a thirty-six year old death doula living in New York. Besides her interesting career, Clover lives a very simple and safe life. Being unable to unpack grief and guilt from her grandfather's death, Clover lives through other people's experiences rather than her own. That is, until Clover meets Claudia, a 91-year old woman who is on her deathbed. Claudia's stories, experiences and regrets help Clover recognize that she has the chance to take charge of her life and live it to the fullest. As our wise Claudia said, "Be cautiously reckless."

I absolutely loved the storyline of this book. I haven't read a book that discusses death in such a positive, beautiful way. While I felt sad for Clover at times, I realized she is thirty-six years old and still has so much life to live. "Don't let the best parts of life pass you by because you're too scared of the unknown."

The only reason I'm not giving this book a five star rating is because I felt that the first half was very slow. The first couple chapters were excellent, but then it kind of dragged up until about 30%. Once I got to about 40%, I could not put this book down!