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The Parenthood Dilemma

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Member Reviews

In The Parenthood Dilemma: Procreation in the Age of Uncertainty, Gina Rushton, a reproductive justice journalist, faces the very personal question of whether or not to become a mother in an age that feels incompatible with parenting. Rushton has long held that she did not want kids of her own, a "sweeping verdict that the world is no place for another child and that I am not supposed to be a parent." But after a diagnosis of endometriosis in her 30s, she became overwhelmed by and obsessed with the question, determined to make a decision before her body made it for her.

The Parenthood Dilemma starts with an emphasis on reproductive rights and justice in the 21st century, before considering the legacy and role of labor (inside of the home, outside of the home, and the mental and emotional variety); the very real threats of climate change; and the role of fertility (and infertility) and inheritance in one's decision to parent. Rushton is asking a question that is likely to resonate with anyone paying attention: "I want to know how people parent without living in permanent denial or perpetual dread." Even drawing on dozens of interviews from diverse voices, reams of research on parenthood and population growth, and countless hours of self-reflection, Rushton doesn't arrive at a clear answer to this existential question. But The Parenthood Dilemma, in its inability (or perhaps refusal) to offer a black-and-white response to a complex, messy inquiry, may actually be an answer in and of itself, inviting insight, reflection, and comfort. --Kerry McHugh

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The Parenthood Dilemma is a well-researched and well-written account of what it means to choose to become a parent present day in Western societies. It has a feminist perspective framed in the author's ambivalent perspective towards having children and feeling compelled to decide immediately due to health issues.

Each chapter focuses on a different issue associated with having children and parenting. She also touches on social issues, politics, and abortion. The Parenthood Dilemma is so thorough and well-researched. Rushton clearly sees thing in a philosophical way. I absolutely loved her writing style. Though she cites many sources, the content never comes off as dry, but as quite considered and thought-provoking. I listened to the audiobook, which was well-narrated and the content kept me riveted. Though I already have children, I got so much out of this thoughtful rumination about parenthood and becoming a mother.

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for providing this ARC. All thoughts are my own.

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An important book for anyone considering whether or not to become a parent. Well written thoughtful with interviews that were intimate open.An excellent guide that has so many questions to think about before you make a life changing decision.#netgalley #astrahouse

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I really appreciated the Parenthood Dilemma, as I have been considering what it means to be child-free. It was nuanced writing and no shaming.

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This book approaches the question of whether to have kids or not through a mix of personal stories about the author and interviews with other questioners and experts from different backgrounds. It raises many more questions than it answers. For someone wondering about the baby decision for themselves, this book will probably not get you closer to a final decision, but it may make you more comfortable with the uncertainty surrounding it all.

While there are other books about motherhood, being childfree, or on how to make the decision to parent, this book is the first I've read written from the perspective of an individual, very thoughtful woman who is trying to find her way to an answer. The book seemed somewhat light on studies of larger populations, so it is more of a personalized approach to the question, and I could see that it may or may not resonate with the reader depending on how similar they are or not to the author. Also, this book is very US, UK, Australia centric.

I found the tone and language of the book to be a bit difficult to read at times. Even though the book's topic is very personal, the language is distant. The overall tone has an undercurrent of anxiety and sadness, sometimes bittersweet.

Thanks to Astra Publishing House and NetGalley for this ARC.

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"I can’t find a template for an ambivalent woman."

I enjoyed this well-organised and well-articulated examination of what it means to be a modern mother and parent. Rushton uses each chapter to examine different factors in what is a life changing choice for anyone, whether that choice is to have a child or not. Being around the author’s age and having considered these factors myself, this book stands out to me among others about this subject because it is topical and takes into account the aftermath of the pandemic and the present state of the climate crisis, is rich and well-written, and most importantly for me, I identified with the
feeling of ambivalence and wondering why career or children are often presented as the only two potential life paths that shape who we become.

I received an ARC of this novel through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

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