I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast is Me was such a good concept and it was super creepy and thrilling! I can’t say I would make a deal like that but I could see why Laure made the choices she made.

Laure is at the top of her class. She wants to be seen, ambitious at whatever cost. So far as going into the Paris Catacombs to find the river of blood to strike a deal! This deal gives her unspeakable power to get to be truely seen, but this also puts a target on her back.

I thought this was well written, though this did slow down in some areas and it really effected the way I felt about the book as a whole. But it wasn’t bad at all, I enjoyed this specially for a genre I don’t normally pick up.

I'm not a huge ballet fan, but that didn't matter for this incredible and bloody horror that gripped me from the very first page. Can't wait for the sequel!

i WILL kill and die for feral girls. like when their eyes turn red and their teeth get sharp and their nails grow into claws i am cHEERING from the sIDELINES

i have never had a book make me want to burn a city to the ground so hard and tbh it kind of rocked. it was so bloody and unsettling and literally, absolutely feral at times. but i came here for those vibes only so tbh i would say it delivered

Rating: 3.8⭐️

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Children’s Publishing Group for a free copy in exchange for an honest review.

The super original concept & gorgeous cover both caught my attention. I definitely wasn’t expecting the monster Laure became, but I not only support women’s rights, I support women’s wrongs, especially when asinine racism is present. I loved seeing how far Laure was willing to go to make her dreams come true & how much she changed along the way.
While there were really good snippets of writing, there were parts where I was confused. It seemed like we were dropped in the middle of Laure’s narrative; we were told alot of what she had experienced instead of being shown, but were also weirdly kept in the dark about certain things, especially about her parental situation. While the beginning went by in a flash and the middle was slow, I did enjoy the ending and would be interested in checking out the next book!

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for this review copy in exchange for an honest opinion. Review has been posted on Amazon.

Unfortunately this one didn't work out for me. I loved the concept of it, however, the pacing threw me off and halfway through I felt like we weren't getting enough of anything. The characters were probably my favorite part because they were all so very flawed and real. I would love to see what else the author brings but this is not it for me.

I’d like to start this review by thanking NetGalley and the publisher. I received this eARC in exchange for an honest review.

BUY THIS BOOK! Last year was a bit much for me so it took me a while to get to this book. Buy it, get it at the library, something! Get this book into your hands and into your eyes or ears! It’s so good!

First off, 5 stars. Right off the bat, I don’t want to be vague about this at all. This is a 5 star book.

The writing? Fantastic. The pacing? Amazing. The characters? Jumped off the page! The only little thing is that since our main character is a ballerina, I have no idea what the names of the ballet moves mean. Or look like. So it took me out of the story a bit . But then Jamison Shea went on to describe what the main character was actually doing with her body and it helped with understanding it.

Now, this book has been out for a bit so some of you may already know about it. But I don’t want to spoil anything.

Our main character is the only Black dancer at this Paris ballet. And as such, she is the victim not only of the cutthroat society that is the ballet. Which, btw, that is terrifying and intense! Tacks and glass in people’s shoes is a thing? So glad I told my mom there was no way I’d do ballet when I was a kid.

So, she has to deal with all that AND racism on top of it. She has to be perfect while everyone else gets away with being just good. Or great even. But she has to be perfect just to be recognized. And it’s painful. Physically and psychologically.

She’s got a best friend and Imma be real with y’all. I have no clue why this girl was her best friend. Sure, she had her good moments but that girl was catty. And I’m not even talking about the stuff that happens later in the book. I just didn’t like her lol.

Our main character is willing to make sacrifices that no one else would even have to contemplate because of her hunger and what’s being denied to her. I loved that she was hungry and angry and vicious and it was so good!

Let girls be angry, vicious, hungry monsters! Don’t shame them for it, rip the world apart!

Ugh, I loved this book and cannot wait for the sequel. So just, please, buy it. Get the audiobook.

Supremely recommend this book.

Thank you, Macmillan and Netgalley, for the eARC. All opinions are my own.

I enjoyed this debut by Jamison Shea. It's told by an unreliable narrator and we never know who we can trust. These are my favorite kinds of stories, so this was right up my alley.

Some depictions described were sort of graphic, with mentions of blood etc.

This one really highlights how cutthroat the competitive job market is, how ambition can become paralyzing, and how it's easy to lose yourself trying to gain favor with others.

I didn't really care for this one, but I think it's just a personal problem. I don't really like a lot of gore or body horror in my books so that's on me. I can see why people would really love and connect with this book, don't get me wrong. I've already purchased the novel for my library and I know it will get checked out. But it just wasn't for me.

The cult/witchy vibes were hitting and I liked the mystery/thriller aspect as well. I'm not super interested in ballerinas, so that's another thing that didn't really intrigue me about this story. Again, a me problem. Because most of the problems I had with this story were personal, I still rated it 4 stars. The writing was good and the plot and pacing were pretty well done.

A villain origin story! Count me in!

Jamison Shea has brought out all the stops with their debut novel, I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me (also, best feeling finding this title mentioned in the book!).

From the minute we meet Laure, the reader can feel her passion, anger, and determination to find greatness pouring out of her. I loved the way that Shea created this character and the ballet world that she inhabited was just as powerful of a character for the story. The ballet company is filled with a cast of secondary characters that fuel the reader to understand and side with Laure’s feelings to the point where you become compassionate to her desire for revenge. There are some genuinely awful and annoying people in the company and I loved reading about every single one of them.

And let’s not forget to talk about the pulsating river of blood that Laure casually brings into her life and all the madness and monstrousness that descends from this encounter in the Catacombs. The imagery is absolutely perfect and Shea writes so vividly that I could easily picture everything happening.

The ending definitely left things open for a potential sequel and should that happen, I will be hitting pre-order!

I've been on a real horror kick this year and was super excited for this one, especially with such an intriguing title and stunning cover! However, after multiple tries, I just wasn't able to get into it. I tried both the ARC and audiobook and just still didn't feel pulled into the story. I'm sure it picks up, but ultimately the slow start just didn't motivate me to keep reading. I've set it aside for now.

This is more to do with me as a reader than with the book! I will absolutely still be recommending this book at my library, especially to fans of "Monstrous" by Jessica Lewis or "The Depths" by Nicole Lesperance.

Laure Mesny wants to be the best and become one of the most famous dancers. But she may need more than practice to help her succeed in the cutthroat world of ballet. This atmospheric dive into what it takes to be a professional ballerina will throw readers into a dark tale. While this gives readers a taste of darker influence, the drama and friction is missing that would make this a truly great read.

I found this book to be dragging at times and was not what it was advertised to be. I personally did not enjoy it, but someone else might!

I throughly enjoyed this book. I read the digital copy in tandem with the audiobook. If you can listen to the audiobook, please do. The different voices especially when the Beast comes into play is absolutely amazing. Laure is trying to get to the top in the Parisian Ballet scene but it’s hard when you’re black and especially when you’re not in the top elite like all the other members. How far will you go to be the best and what all are you willing to give? Racism and classism are at the forefront of why Laure feels as if no one sees her. Even if she is better than the rest they will never admit it but maybe there’s a way to make them. Deep below Paris in the catacombs there’s an entity that may be able to help her but is it really worth it. I can’t to wait to read the next book.

I loved the premise of this book, and enjoy books based in the world of ballet, but this just fell a little short for me. Some parts were strong and appreciated the author exploring the experiences of dancers of color in ballet, but there were some unnecessary bits that could have been eliminated to make this stronger. I'm still looking forward to this author's next work though.

The cover: stunning. The prose: stunning. I love everything about Laure and the rep throughout. Shea wowed with a fabulous debut and I’m counting down the days to the next book.

first off - i LOVE this cover. it is stunning! secondly, i enjoyed this book overall. i usually don't vibe with YA but this one didn't read too young and it kept me on my toes.

So, that was interesting! I fully admit that if I would've gone in with different expectations, I think my rating would've been higher. However, where I was expecting an action packed, sapphic thriller with intense ballet life and a dark villain origin story, it really kinda went in a different direction. And I realize that's not a fault with the book so while I am giving this 3 stars, this very well may be a 5 star read for others as I don't think this is a bad book whatsoever. The characters are mostly unlikable in my opinion, but Laure is an awesome MC and her motivations were very clear. This is a dark story with high stakes for her, so seeing her slow descent into darkness was fascinating. While I wish the pacing was a bit more steady and the characters much more likable, overall I think there's a lot here to enjoy. The horror is DISTURBING which I loved.

This book was incredible. It is packed with intensity and drama from front to back. It felt like fire running through my veins. If you like stories about female rage, about messy, monstrous, unapologetic queer Black girls, about matching harmful systems of power violence for violence until they come crashing down in a blaze of vindictive glory, then you absolutely have to read this.

Everything about this story is perfectly considered. The backdrop of a ballet academy is the perfect choice for a horror story, because if you know anything about how cutthroat the ballet industry is, the way it demands that you sacrifice your body, humanity, and individuality on the altar of beauty and art, then having a monster be born into that atmosphere and *because* of it makes a whole lot of sense.

I can’t even put into words how satisfying it is to read this book. Like I said, it’s gruesome, it’s violent, it’s graphic, it pulls no punches when it comes to Laure slowly but surely giving herself over to monstrosity and I love it for that. To see a young poor queer Black girl lean into her power without remorse, with regret, without feeling the need to stifle herself or make any explanations, no matter how terrible and perhaps uncontrollable that power may be, is so incredibly cathartic.

And it’s so freeing because Laure has spent so much time doing things the quote-unquote “Right Way,” holding herself prisoner to these unattainable standards of skill, and morality, and restraint in all the ways that are supposed to maker her palatable and acceptable, and it never works. Obviously a lot of that stems from the compounded systemic oppression she faces on a daily basis. So it’s powerful to see her say, “Fuck it. I’ve tried to be ten million different versions of myself to be what everyone wants me to be. I’ve tried to follow these steps that are supposed to lead me to success, and it’s not happening. So I’m gonna do things the way I want to. I’m not going to hope that people see me; I’m not going to give them a choice.”

The story is taking that concept of “carving out space for yourself” to a whole new level, and using this mechanic of forbidden eldritch power to show how you can’t carve out that space for yourself by going down the path of least resistance. You have to make people uncomfortable. You have to make waves. You have to forcibly disrupt the system. You have to go against the grain—all of which are often perceived by those who hold the power as “violence.”

The story tackles all of those things—white "fragility," white compliance in maintaining and upholding Black suffering and the semantics of marginality, how BIPOC people aren’t allowed to succeed without being accused of “taking someone else’s opportunities”—and it’s bringing all those conversations to the fore through this tremendously effective horror lens.

The other thing I loved about this story is that there are so many parallels to “Phantom of the Opera,” especially in its aethetics and thematic explorations, which made my heart very happy. (The ballet itself, I believe, is actually set in the same opera house.)

It has that same vibe of selling your soul to the devil for the sake of achieving greatness, it has that same juxtaposition of this incredible artistry being haunted by an evil or corrupt history, it’s a similar sort of cautionary tale about exclusion and the desperation that might cause. But most importantly, I definitely see parallels between the two because they’re both stories about being hurt by something you love so much—about how, when you pour so much of yourself, and your identity, and your humanity into something that only seems to have value when it is witnessed, you will inevitably come to live and die by the sword that is your own creation.

That could be a whole thesis paper in and of itself, so I’ll leave it at that. But suffice to say, I found those parallels to be very intentional, very satisfying, but also incredibly smart, because it’s very much in the background, in the subtext, and doesn’t stand in the way of this story’s uniqueness.

There was also a dark romance element that I was very much into. I do enjoy a good Monster x Monster romance, and that aspect of the story was incredibly compelling. Again, if you want to read something and feel vindicated, feel deeply sated in your bones, feel as if you’ve been baptized in fire, then you have to read this. I loved everything about this and I cannot recommend it highly enough.

I adored this book. It's absolutely vicious, brutal, and gorgeous. I was amazed at how clearly the language merged the beauty and wonder and creation of the ballet with the horrors it inflicts on the bodies of the dancers. Every character in it was fascinating, and I was rooting for Laure every step of the way (even with full understanding that we would not get along in the slightest). Delicious and satisfying. I loved every minute of it.