I loved the format of this book and the thoughtful polyamorous musings. It helped inspire me to have more direct communication with my partner.

I found the author's open and candid writing truly refreshing - though, I'll admit to struggling a bit with the organization of the essays. It was truly a pleasure to read this lived-experience memoir and have it actually be the author's lived experience. Their descriptions of emotions were so pointed and direct that it would be impossible not to understand.

This might be my new favorite book on polyamory. Unlike the standard recommended reading of the polyamory community, such as The Ethical Slut or More Than Two, Entwined reads less like an instruction manual and more like a memoir. Alex Alberto relates their experiences in polyamory, mistakes and all, with such expressive style that the reader can't help but empathize with every intense emotion. As such, the book manages to touch on many common pitfalls of polyamory but in a way that's compassionate and non-judgmental towards the author's partners as well as the author themself, and by extension, towards readers who may have made some of the same mistakes. For people new to polyamory, the book provides a gentle warning of the potential difficulties, illustrating through real-life examples how things tend to play out. This will most likely be the first book I recommend to polyamory newcomers from now on, and I will be requesting a copy for my library's collection.

This book was such a warm and enriching read. I am exploring this topic somewhat newly and was so astonished at the poetic and supportive nature of the author’s point of view…it was helpful and beautiful.

Thanks to NetGalley for providing me an arc in exchange for an honest review!

This is very late for a review of an arc, but I stand by my choice to have waited to read this until I did. Polyamory is different for everyone, and each 'cule will have their own systems, but I don't know if I would have enjoyed this as much if I hadn't just read an aggressively heterosexual book about non-monogamy. Alex Alberto is an excellent writer, and this shines through in each chapter regardless of format. The struggles they express are relatable, the joys even more so, and I most appreciated how honest they were about the ever evolving nature of their relationships. There is no end point, just a chronological catching up to the present. I'm going to keep an eye out for their future works, and more of Quilted Press's projects.

It was a brutally honest memoir. I appreciate the author willingness to be open with their readers and share all aspects of their life with us. It gives pretty clear idea of what's polyamory and how it works for them which is the point of the book. I don't have that much to say about besides that it's clear and to the point.

Author's a Canadian and their first language is French and their gender is expressed differently there than in English. As a linguist I adore stuff like that.

I wish the part where the author rewrites popular media to feature polyamory was real. Polyamorous relationship > love triangle

One small nitpick I have with this book is that it's kinda all over the place. It doesn't seem to follow chronological or thematical order and sometimes it's hard to figure out where in the timeline events happen.

Thank you Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

one of the most moving representations of polyamory from start to existence, fully expressed as a polyamorous being. the emphasis on community, metamours, friends, and all of the beings that compose a constellation of someone's life reimagines the nuclear family.

I’ve been reading Entwined over the past few weeks, dipping in and out of it on my phone. There’s parts I love and parts that I don’t, but overall, it is well worth the read, no matter what your style of relationship development. My own relationships, sexuality, and other personal information are just that – mine – so I don’t spend a lot of time talking about them online. That said, there were a lot of things in this book that really rang true to me. The feelings of jealousy and openness within relationships, that drive for connection and family. Some of the essays were fantastic, especially the ones where Alberto talks about developing relationships with their partners’ partners. There were some tongue-in-cheek ones further on that came across as more preachy than fun, despite clear efforts to keep the book from being preachy. But these were in the minority.

This was lovely - a very open, honest, and compassionate look into polyamory. I’ve never read any books on it before, nor do I have any personal experience, so I don’t want to speak on how polyamory is described beyond saying that this felt very nuanced, showing both the joys and complexities of non-monogamy.

What I can say is that I really enjoyed the different styles and formats throughout the book. The essay on alternative outcomes to famous movies, if only the characters had been poly, was hilarious. Some essays were very emotional and touching. From relationships growing, changing, and ending to parents and their (lack of) understanding and acceptance.

The care with which jealousy and un-learning cis/heteronormative and monogamous relationship views were explored and explained make this a great book for any reader, I think. Regardless of what your relationship(s) look like, there’s a lot to be said for the honesty and openness Alex describes. Without wanting to co-opt the term, compersion (as in, joy for others in the opposite form of jealousy) seems like something beneficial for everyone.

Not unimportantly, the essays are highly accessible. The writing is clear and at times I found I had to remind myself these were real people and events I was reading about (in a good way!). Highly recommend this collection.

entwined: essay on polyamory and making family 💜

i haven’t come across anything like this book before and i seriously think alex is adding something new and exciting to the current market. polyamory is kind of a taboo topic in our society and i feel like even within the lgbtq+ community you don’t hear people talking about it as freely as alex dared in this book.

i really appreciated alex’s frankness and genuine vulnerability. they come across as down-to-earth, with a lot of interesting new insights. personally at times i dwindled off a bit when the topic left polyamory, since i picked up this book mainly for that theme. i felt like some of the other things that were explored were done so a bit superficially.

technically these are all essays, but the format of the book is very original and engaging. all of the essays take a different form (so for example next to the normal style essays, you have a play, an advice column, etc). some of these formats really worked for me, others did not. overall i liked the switching styles, but i think it is always a bit of a risk when you try to appeal to so many different formats. so positive: there is something for everyone. but also negative: there will probably also be one or two that don’t work for you (or at least for me).

like the author says in their preface: dont see it as a how-to, because its not. instead see it as a way of learning empathy maybe towards a sexuality / form of relationship that isnt widely accepted. all the issues i had with this book had more to do with personal preference than actual flaws from the authors side.

my favorite part of this collection was definitely the exploration of the non-nuclear family & communal living. thank you alex for sharing your story & thank you netgalley for the advanced copy.

Alex has created something beautiful and potent here. Entwined is an artistic and vulnerable, bold yet gentle memoir about polyamory composed in a way I had not seen before. The essay style format allowed for so much creativity and perspective, and made the book very entertaining and intimate to read.

“Polyamory is about developing multiple relationships with partners that you care about, with everyone in the know and - in my case - everyone hanging out with each other. For me, it’s not about casual sex. Amor means love!”

As someone who has not previously been exposed to polyamory but approaches non-traditional ways of living and loving with great curiosity and open-mindedness, I am very grateful for this book. I had always been a little confused and frankly somewhat hesitant toward the concept, but this memoir allowed very enriching and enlightening perspectives and insights, making polyamory into something that I can now grasp. I do not believe that it is for everyone, but neither is monogamy. Alex is great at not communicating in extremes, but finding a skillfully balanced line that expands capacity for various ways to live and love. And that is something not many people can do whilst writing a book that is also enjoyable to read. Left me with a lot of thoughts.

I have now corrected my preconceptions, realizing that polyamory is not simply about physical intimacy but rather emotional ones. I have deep admiration for the radical transparency and honesty Alex described about themselves and their partners employing in their relationships. It is very inspiring, regardless of which relationship model one follows. I realized that relationships and love can genuinely be what anybody wants them to be, and how the traditional ideal of love is just that. One of many versions of how one can live their lives. Why erase all alternatives, why forbid people to find what’s best for them? It is a simple fact that very many people are unsatisfied in their relationships, and yet remain in them. Books like these help open your eyes toward hope and different perspectives and approaches, with polyamory just being one amongst many that deconstruct the relationship escalator. “Imagine you could design your relationship with legos: you can pick the pieces you want, leave aside the ones you don’t, and build any shape you like.”

Towards the end, Alex touches upon many more aspects such as asexuality, genderqueerness, the pressures of the nuclear family or rather not having children, and how a relationship can be of value regardless of whether it persisted. “Most people around me consider a relationship a failure if it ended. But why would the criteria for something’s success be that it never ended or never evolved into something different?” This memoir is packed with beautiful life lessons and serves as an inspiration on various topics. Thank you for letting us into your mind and heart, Alex. It is not an easy task to be this vulnerable and publish one’s deepest thoughts and fears for the whole world to see. This is a book I would love to have as a physical copy and go back to the many parts I found inspiring for my monogamous relationship.

“Polyamory taught me how to share romantic love and sex, which culturally, are the most dangerous things to share. Once I learned how to do that, I started seeing the potential for creating abundance everywhere.”

ARC received in exchange for an honest review.

Entwined is an excellent memoir with heart, a personal tale of exploring intentional, found family and deconstructing modern Western society's social norms (e.g., promotion of the nuclear family, the devaluing of strong platonic bonds).

While it is presented as a memoir and intentionally not as a "how to" book, for everyone's relationships will be different, the genuine, positive representation of polyamory and fluid LGBTQ relationships is heartening and much of the guidance (e.g., the value of open communication, etc.) holds true across relationships of many kinds).

This book is a wonderful eye-opener, a primer, on what relationships can be when someone chooses to seek out what helps them feel collectively complete rather than using a prescribed "one-size-fits-all" template on relationship building.

Would whole-heartedly recommend.

I commend the author for writing these essays - and they truly are, as the name says, “essays” as in writing attempts. I really appreciate that the author’s sexuality and gender identity were given space to evolve throughout the narrative. As a Francophile, I loved the Québécois/francophone touches. I just wish this collection was better edited. The one about movies rewritten as polyamory didn’t fit and there was a lot of repetition amongst the rest. Something I found odd and unrealistic was how the author never seemed to get rejected by any potential lover. But I absolutely loved the transition from love as a scarce resource to abundance. All in all a worthwhile piece of work that I hope (but doubt) will reach beyond the queer polyamorous reading community.

I wanted to start reading nonfiction, and this was my introduction. It included essays, texts, emails, etc.
I really enjoyed it. I love getting to know people and learning about their relationships.
Polyamory has always been something I’m curious about. I’m glad I got to know a bit more about it from Alex’s point of view. I liked getting to know their life’s journey thus far.
It is very complex and not for everyone, but it works.
I’m looking forward to more of Alex Alberto’s works.

PS. Alex and Don are everything. Thank you.

For those who're curious as well as for those who have experience, this essay collection is for you!

Told in multiple formats and an interesting mix of genres, these essays really convey the process of learning about yourself and living a not so conventional life.

At times funny and at others aching with feeling, this collection is something I'm going to revisit again and again.

It's made me question what I believe about intimacy and monogamy when it relates to myself, which is a win for this work.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for an Arc of this book. All opinions are my own

Polyamory is not something I have learned about before picking up this book. It absolutely gave me a lot to think about and I believe it is a must read.I think this was an incredible exploration and depiction of love in all its forms. The structure of each of the essays were used to explore narrativity and the impacts the way a story is told can have on readers.

It's hard for me not to cry as I finish reading this book. As a young queer person, living in a country where anything outside of the norm is shamed, reading this has been liberating. I have always struggled with the traditional model of monogamous romantic relationships. It felt restrictive and wrong. I've always felt guilty for not wanting what everyone else around me wants. Thank you for showing me that my need to share the love inside of me is not something I should fear or hide.

Perhaps I'll writing something more coherent about this book later but right now, I'm overwhelmed with emotion.

Thank you NetGalley for providing me with an ARC. And thank you Quilted Press!

Thank you to NetGalley and Quilted Press for the ARC! This book is so lovingly written, I didn't want it to end. It honestly took me longer to finish than I imagined — every essay felt compelling and necessary, every word needed to be savored and turned over in my mouth.

Alex Alberto writes with such adoration and spirit that it's nearly impossible to set this book down. Alberto entertains a variety of structures and narratives throughout each essay (even crafting a family conflict over the holidays into a briefly striking play). I was surprised that this was their first book — Alberto absolutely thrives in playful formats, which is a genuine testament to how their creativity accentuates the raw feelings of grief, pleasure, and wonder that overflows from this collection.

Over anything, what I admire most about this book is the openness and hope that it leaves in its wake. If there is one thing to remember from this book it's that love is not a finite resource; for centuries we've been raised and indoctrinated with solely monogamous ideals to the extent that we can only conceptualize heteronormative relationships and relegate anything outside of that form as deleterious. But love is formless and abundant, we have so much of it and are constantly wondering where to put it. Alberto illustrates not only that these relationships can exist but how to explore and build and cherish them. In equal weight, I learned from this book as much as I enjoyed consuming it. Just reading through Alberto's experiences with their partners allowed me a better understanding of my own feelings of jealousy / scarcity, the ways it can be communicated, and how to address my partner's and my own needs.

To be able to read other people's experiences with polyamory + relationships in general is such a privilege that I feel incredibly grateful to have in this lifetime. Alberto is a lovely writer and I look forward to reading more from them!!

This was a lovely nonfiction series of essays about experiences with polyamory. I felt very seen while reading this, and I learned some new things along the way! Each essay/chapter takes a different format, which worked well for some, but not as well for others. But overall I loved this and I think it should be shelved as an excellent poly resource right up there with the classics (Polysecure, The Ethical Slut, More Than Two, etc.).

4.5 rounded up!

🌈Queer rep: nonbinary author, NB/M + poly relationships with M/F/NB people.

This was a nice collection of essays.

My favorite section was “blockbuster tropes reimagined with polyamorous characters.”