Did not finish book. Stopped at 15%.
I was excited to read this book when I read the summary on NetGalley. However, this book felt “off” for me. First, I could not figure out who the audience was supposed to be for this book. Second, I felt this was one long rant by the author and the tone came off as condescending for the majority of the book. Third, I felt the writing was erratic going off on too many tangents that did not work for the serious theme of the book. Honestly, I think this book deserves a major rewrite to draw in the intended audience and for the author to be more clear and concise on the positions they want to express. Overall, I agreed with many of the points that the author was trying to make but feel the writing was inadequate and will not draw many positive reviews.

i was really excited to get an advanced copy of this book but was quickly let down by it. the authors start off with a hypothetical that is wordy and convoluted, then quickly transition into all the ways the reader is biased and looking at sexual violence through the “wrong” lens. while this might work for some, the authors approach of coming in hot at the beginning felt condescending and, at times, like they were cheapening the experience of victims of sexual violence. there was also an almost weaponized use of statistics that just did not hit for me and i felt like their discussion of the legal landscape across the US was less than helpful at best.

maybe this book will be enlightening for some, but as an attorney that has spent a lot of time working in and thinking about the sexual violence space and the legal ramifications for victims and perpetrators, this book wasn’t for me at all.

thanks to #netgalley, the publisher, and the authors for an #ARC.

This book was painful to get through, and not in the way the author intended. It was clear early on that this book didn’t know what it wanted to be and I think it would’ve been better with a different title or rewritten with a different purpose. That is why I ultimately had to DNF this book. From the start, and throughout the book, the author uses a tone of enlightenment, promising to expand your mind and your perspectives of sexual assault. I started reading with the expectation to do just that. I was prepared to be challenged, to hear the facts, though most excitedly, to receive new information. This is where my expectations were not met.

While you can tell the authors have spent a lot of time gathering plenty of statistics to support their ideas, many of the points made don’t feel fully executed. This bothered me the most. A prime example of this is one of the main themes of this book which is… Surprise… men get assaulted too and feel shame. And also, women can be predators…. OF COURSE! This is common knowledge. The voice the authors take on is one that isn’t only argumentative at times but weaponized. They seemingly utilize said statistics against those of women in an attempt to minimize women experiences. While I was initially happy to see advocacy for men in a gender neutral space, because the reality is, anyone can be assaulted. Through all of its stats this book failed to delve into its themes to most fully present their positioning or bring to light new information to uphold their suggestions. This is why ultimately even their proposed resolutions in Part II felt familiar, yet unresolved.

At the end of the day I recognize that there’s some people that will love this by the numbers approach, and may even feel this offers a fresh take. I can appreciate the effort that went into sourcing the information for this book, as there is a lot of accurate statements made. Though anyone can make numbers match their point.