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Touch No One

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Touch no one by Joseph Hirsch.
Body Modification is nothing new in Schengen City. Even Detective John Moglich has a cybered arm, on account of being shot by a punk with an auto-shotgun back when he was a cop. Naturally, when Detective Moglich is given a hefty sum to investigate the attempted murder of a woman with more than her fair share of mods, he doesn't hesitate. As he gets deeper into the investigation, things get weirder. He discovers a fetish subculture centering on the worship of the female breast, and the conversion of its milk into a pain-soothing drug. The milk may be poisoned though, since those who drink it are dying in strange ways. Even worse is the discovery that those who taste the breastmilk are also found to be carrying an ugly parasite in their blood. The bloodsucker is half-monster, half-machine, and Detective Moglich must find its creator before it’s too late.
A very enjoyable read. Great story and characters. 4*.

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Touch No One by Joseph Hirsch was a bizarre novel and I couldn't make heads or tails of it and despite finishing it I honestly didn't understand it at all but I had absolutely no desire to go back and reread the book in order to understand the story.

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This book isn’t for me, couldn’t finish! The writing type didn’t draw me in and I couldn’t really get into it.

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Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for providing me with a copy in exchange for an honest review.

"Body Modification is nothing new in Schengen City. Even Detective John Moglich has a cybered arm, on account of being shot by a punk with an auto-shotgun back when he was a cop. Naturally, when Detective Moglich is given a hefty sum to investigate the attempted murder of a woman with more than her fair share of mods, he doesn't hesitate.

As he gets deeper into the investigation, things get weirder. He discovers a fetish subculture centering on the worship of the female breast, and the conversion of its milk into a pain-soothing drug. The milk may be poisoned though, since those who drink it are dying in strange ways. Even worse is the discovery that those who taste the breastmilk are also found to be carrying an ugly parasite in their blood. The bloodsucker is half-monster, half-machine, and Detective Moglich must find its creator before it’s too late."

DNF'd at 28%

Now reading the synopsis, I don't know why I ever requested this title. It is not something that usually interests me and it just sounds weird.

It was weird, but that is not where my problems lie. I was first concerned when Hirsch used the term 'daddy issues' in the first few pages. I hate this term because it is making light of potential mental health issues caused by bad parenting. A few pages later, he uses the term 'spastic'. I don't think I need to go any further on that one.

I carried on, hoping that they were just a bad choice of terminology but I was wrong to be optimistic.

When we come across the attempted murder victim, our protagonist asks "She's been strangled. Do you know anything about her sex life?". Maybe I am wrong, but when you discover a woman who has been beaten and strangled to the point of near death, that should not be your initial thought. He then goes on to think "If.... she said 'drink soothing opium from my nipple', why wouldn't he be tempted to oblige?". I am not for any victim shaming.

Throw in some stupid phrases like 'higher than a giraffe's vagina' and you're basically caught up to speed. I just couldn't take any more of the transphobia, making fun of mental illnesses, racism and definitely no more of the sexism. I cannot believe there are so many good reviews. I'm disgusted.

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Sometimes, despite their horrible book covers, a book surprises you. This is one of those times. The cover doesn't do the book justice, nor does it really have anything to do with the book. (Spoiler alert, there are no eyes on anyone's breasts, sorry)

It's cyberpunk noir. It's a quick and captivating read. For fans of Philip K. Dick and Dashiell Hammett

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Touch No One is a book that lulls you into a false sense of security with its familiar detective-noir narration, and then challenges you with the inclusion of cyberpunk sci-fi elements, before completely unsettling you with the ever-darker, and increasingly more complex, plot developments. What Joseph Hirsch has attempted here is rather bold and audacious, but it works surprisingly well.

On that detective-noir, front we have the tired old cliché of a retired police detective turned private investigator, all cranky and suitably jaded, who agrees to take on an attempted murder investigation for the money. On the cyberpunk front, we have a world where body augmentation is standard, artificial intelligence abounds, and neural connections allow brains to serve (essentially) as discreet smartphones. On the plot development front . . . well, that's where things get interesting.

This is a story involving augmented prostitutes, adult nursing, opium-laced lactation, freaky parasitic infections, the worship of ancient gods, conspiracies, and murder. Every time I figured the story had reached the pinnacle of weirdness (the giant crib with the freaky fetish totem breastpump was an early highlight), a new character or a new wrinkle was introduced. Hirsch takes his time with each development, drawing out the story between them, so it's not an assault upon the senses, but rather an infection of its own that keeps worming deeper and deeper into your brain. It is often creepy and gross, making you crave a Touch brand cuddle when you're done, but it (smartly) never crosses the line of eroticism.

If you have an imagination broad enough to encompass the ideas, and don't need to be spoon-fed explanations for everything, Touch No One can be a dangerously addictive read.

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