Cover Image: Steps in My Shoes

Steps in My Shoes

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Member Reviews

This was an honest and heartfelt account of the author's journey through the care system.

Having been neglected by their biological parents, he is fostered with his eldest sister. When his behaviour became problematic, he was moved to another foster family. He is diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder (RAD) and sensory processing disorder (SPD) and this coupled with the neglect, must have left him in a very emotional and vulnerable state.

I was sad to read that he ended up spending some time in a detention centre. I found it interesting that he experienced different religions from the various families he stayed with and would have liked to read more about this.

Thanks indeed to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.

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Although the reason for this book is really good and needed. This was not a good book.

The writing was what I would expect from a secondary school student, (high school in USA). And although he spoke about himself ( a lot ), nothing was said about how others could benefit from this book. Which I assumed that was the reason.

I feel appalled and saddened by a system which let him and many others down but I do not feel writing is his way of getting that across.

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As a foster/adoptive mom, this book really gets to the root of the foster system. Well written and informative.

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I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Highly recommended read! Thanks for providing through Net Galley. Five Stars *****

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Ron was a foster child who had 2 adoptive families that gave him up on top of his biological family. He was diagnosed with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) which causes him to act out in severe anger episodes with an inability to trust or bond with others and sensory Processing Sensitivity (SPS) linked with anger intensified his emotions, with an inability to express his emotional response in a normal or healthy manner. He was removed from his biological home due to the depraved conditions and horrid way him and his sister were treated. I really couldn't wait to get into this book but was so disappointed. There were no examples or descriptions of what he truly went through and he kept saying that he was writing the book to help other kids in his situation but yet I didn't feel like this book was a help to anyone except maybe him skirting the issue of what he went through. There is so much more that could have been said/done.

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I got this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book wasn't good. It was a real struggle to read it. I sympathize with Mr. Deming because he did have a very rough life but writing just isn't his thing. Steps in My Shoes needs a great deal of editing (by someone other than pamanderson at Fiverr) to help tighten up the prose, insert helpful pronouns, and remove a large amount of redundancy.

I am a stickler when it comes to editing, I'll admit, but this book was little more than a high school paper. It was terribly short and ended abruptly. Mr. Deming's tale needs some serious expansion and professional work before it is really ready to be told in full.

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Things may be rough now, but they can and do get better. Just because you're in the system doesn't mean no one will ever want you in their life. A book reaching out to those still finding their way through the system and it's after-effects.

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i was rather disappointed with this book it wasnt what i expected, i guess it may appeal to social workers and care workers more than the normal memoir reader It does relate to every day struggles of a foster child but goes over and over the same points constantly,

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The book provides an honest, first-person perspective of a foster child but it is an extremely abbreviated perspective. Perhaps due to the author's RAD and SPS, there is little feeling demonstrated in the book. Experiences are discussed in a very scientific manner, almost as though they've been cleansed of any emotion. This leads the reader to be devoid of developing any empathy or feelings for the foster child. It's an interesting take on foster child experiences, most likely due to the psychological conditions of which the author suffers.

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A first hand account of life in the foster and adoptive system, Ron Deming gives insight into his life and motivations as he grew p in and out of behavioral centers. It's an interesting look at several particular disorders and I liked hearing from him what these meant to him. I do wish the book as longer for a more in depth read. But I would recommend it to those who have been through the same experiences or someone close to someone who lived these experiences.

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This is an important topic, but the writing is horrible. I will not post a negative review.

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“Steps in My Shoes: The Life of a Foster Child” begins when author Ron Deming was removed with his sisters from the care of their biological family and placed in foster care. The local news in Ft. Wayne, Indiana covered the story-- due to the severity of neglect, parental rights were terminated. After a year, Ron was adopted along with his sister in the first of adoptive home settings.

Early trauma impacts children with a variety of negative and unhealthy behaviors: Ron received dual diagnosis from the therapists at the Charter Beacon facility that tried to help him. Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) caused him to act out in severe anger episodes with an inability to trust or bond with others. Sensory Processing Sensitivity (SPS) linked with anger intensified his emotions, with an inability to express his emotional response in a normal or healthy manner. It didn’t help that his first adoptive family couldn’t care for him, preferring to provide a home for his sister and not him. It was unfortunate; the rejection from care in private homes would lead to stressful custodial care in various facilities, before shifting back to another foster care placement.

The transition to adulthood can be difficult as foster youth age out of state care. With the support of a caring mentor, Ron was able to gain his footing as a college student, elementary school teacher, and eventually met his partner and became a father. The last part of the book is about personal growth and development as he dealt with the hardships of his past associated with his upbringing and became a successful man. Ron narrates his story in a matter-of-fact style without much emotion or dramatic storyline. Considering his upbringing this is understandable. I applaud this debut effort and sharing his inspirational story. ~ With thanks to the Independent Book Publishers Association (IBPA) via NetGalley for the direct e-copy for the purpose of review.

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Oh dear. I have not yet had a bad book on Netgalley but sadly this is my first. Ron Deming is clearly a brave man who has been through things no child or young adult should and it's great that he wants to help others but I think maybe it should be done as public speaking or as a book with a ghost writer as writing is not Mr Deming's strong suit.
Sentences or themes were repeated over and over "my first adopted Mom did this" next sentence "my first adopted Mom did that" with no attempt to vary it, use pronouns instead of the characters name or title.
It was just very, very hard to read and I had to force myself to finish it.
I am known for my pedantry though so perhaps if you are a reader who doesn't care so much about the use of language and grammar then you may enjoy reading this.

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An interesting short insight of what it's like to grow up in foster care and be passed from family to family. This books looks at the positives and negatives and how one man battled through

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More of a short assessment than a memoir but an interesting insight into the mind of a child in the care system. It was quickly put together and really needed a bit of proof reading and ghost writing. Just 76 pages but it does give hope to other children in the same situation. Thank you Net Galley for my copy.

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Steps in My Shoes is a true account of of the authors journey through the foster care system and beyond.
I was very keen to read this book as I work with children in similar situations and wanted to read something from their perspective not a book written by a psychologist, Doctor etc as the expers in these situations are the children involved. Lots of the book reminded me of children I have worked with and it did help me understand what has made them the child they are regarding their behaviour. The book felt like a chance for the author to get it all off his chest and not one for him to just make money. I felt the book was way too short, but very powerful. I really felt for the author as a young child and throughout the book as he grows up. With so many children currently in the care system I feel the book is very helpful to anyone involved in their care. I hope the author is successful in everything he does as he has come a long way and throughout he has helped himself and only had a few outsiders help him on the way. A quick read which has made me think deeply about ways I can support children like this.

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MoMo’s Book Diary recommends this memoir as a motivational 5* read.

Steps in my Shoes has been written in a memoir style aimed at reaching young people who have experienced, or are currently experiencing, foster care. Ron tells snippets of the challenges he faced growing up in the system, but gives hope that if you can persevere at aiming for the best life you can make then its within reach.

I read this book quite quickly, its not long – 76 pages – but the message stayed with me hours after finishing. I have not experienced life in the system but have a few friends that have and I have read a number of books regarding fostering and adoption and spent a few years working on the administration side of child services in the UK.

Ron’s story touched me with the way that he has written so personally about the events he chose to share in this book. These events are just a few of the days and I am sure Ron has many many more tales he could tell.

I think it is important for children who are currently in this situation that they know there is more to life than the days they are experiencing now. It is good that they can read stories like Ron’s and see that there is hope they can move on with their lives and become people that matter, people that help others, people that do good. So often we are told that children who have entered the system will never make anything of themselves in the real world… we know this is not true but do the children know that….

This was a very motivating read and one I would recommend reading.

Thanks to Netgalley for the opportunity to read this fascinating piece of writing.

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This autobiobraphy is a MUST READ for public educators and social workers! This was a quick read--which would be invaluable as professional development time well spent. Heart-wrenching, yet insightful, Ron Deming details his life through foster care (from approximately age 2) to present day in adulthood. He explains the mysterious workings of Reactive Attatchment Disorder--with which he was diagnosed due to his early and frequent residence changes--along with another conflicting social ailment. I was able to personally connect to this book, because of some very specific experiences as a teacher. Because of this, I would recommend middle and high school students (and teachers alike) read this book. I think it might help nurture the empathy which seems to be dwindling in today's society.

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This was an interesting book that had potential. The author could have added more information to his story as this read almost as an essay more than a full book on his life as a foster child. If you want a quick read from someone who was in the system then this is for you. However if you want a more detailed book then this is not it.

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