I received an ARC of the ebook for This Is Not a Love Letter, via NetGalley, in exchange for an honest review.

Chris Kirk is a star-athlete, straight 'A' student, and all-around nice guy. One night he goes for a run, and doesn't return. This sets his girlfriend Jessie--with whom he was on "a break"--into a frenzy to find out what happened to her boyfriend.

From that point, we are all along for the ride.

The author, Kim Purcell does a great job of pulling you into the story. From the start you're trying to figure out what happened to Chris? Where is he? Is he alive or dead? Who knows what?

Though we only have one perspective to entertain--that of Jessie's--it's from the one character who seemingly was closest to Chris. From her, we're able to glean some understanding of how Chris related to everyone else (both central and peripheral) to the story.

Where I began to have trouble was around the midway point: what type of story was this intended to be, honestly?

On the one hand, it felt like a mystery.

There's the introduction of motive via the jealous teammate (Dave Johnson) who isn't happy about Chris being scouted and offered a scholarship. A scholarship offer he felt would have been his if Chris hadn't shown up and taken it from him.

Johnson is introduced as a jerk, who is potentially both racist and homophobic, with anger management issues. Jessie wonders if said jealousy boiled over into something more, especially given her knowledge of the twos previous interactions.

This is what brings the cops on the scene.

However, as the story continues to unfold, and Jessie learns more about Chris through the words of others, we're forced to consider other alternatives for his disappearance.

What is crystal clear is Jessie and Chris have a very codependent relationship. It's not healthy. Both she and he have emotional issues, stemming from abandonment and lack of trust, and each acts in extreme ways to protect themselves from more emotional harm.

As these things come to light, it's clear this story is meant to be much deeper than a mystery and, as such, greater care could have been taken to allow for other perspectives to be given.

Jessie's wasn't nearly enough and, honestly, after awhile her self-centeredness began to grate on my nerves.

Overall, the story started out with a load of potential but, by the time I reached the end, I was disappointed with the handling of the story and the inattention given to the central character via the lack of other perspectives.

Though books in the form of letter is not a new conceit, This Is Not a Love Letter manages both the form and the storytelling very well. The ever-increasing suspense about the fate of Chris and the equally powerful agony felt by Jessie and her friends over his disappearance were expressed through the smaller details of the relationships in the book. The relationship between Jessie and Chris is both extraordinary and flawed. And the parents in the book are real characters that care about the kids. Highly recommend for teen readers who love romance and suspense.

High school senior Chris Kirk goes out for a run and doesn't come back. What has happened?
We follow the mystery with the narrator, Chris' girlfriend, Jessie.
There are complications. Jessie and Chris were "on a break" so Jessie has been out of touch with Chris' routines. She knows a secret he asked her not to share with anyone, though. A secret that may be a lead to his disappearance. Is it foul play? Has Chris just left town for a few days? Could it be a suicide? Chris has a bright future ahead of him. He's got a baseball scholarship, he's a neat, responsible kid from a religious family. And even though Jessie and he were on a one-week break, he had to know she loves him like crazy, right? Would he have chosen to give all that up?
This story has so many twists and turns that it really keeps a reader guessing until the very end.
There are plenty of high emotions, regret, and longing. This story can keep your stomach in knots.


If I'm rating this as a young adult, I'd rate it 4 stars. If I'm rating it as the 50 year old reader I am, I'd rate it 3 stars.
Sometimes it's difficult for me to read young adult literature, because I imagine some things are geared specifically for the way teenagers think and feel. And I don't just mean the feelings of a character or the perspective shared, I mean the plot points and how realistic they are.

I have two major sticking points:
First, the detective working Chris' missing person case is in primary contact with Jessie, Chris' high school-aged girlfriend. I understand that this is a device used by the writer to give the audience more information through the first person narrator telling the story (Jessie) and for us to experience the story with her. This rings so false to me, though, that it's hard for me to take the story seriously. The police would be in touch with the immediate family. There's also just too much divulged by the detective - he shares more with Jessie than I think police would share, especially with someone who'd be considered a possible suspect. Girlfriends, boyfriends, partners of the missing/deceased are always suspects.
Second, Jessie gives a TV reporter sound bytes accusing a suspect of a hate crime against Chris... killing him because he's African American. She uses the suspect's name in the clip and it's used on the news. Holy cow, this would be such trouble on so many levels. I think about the legal issues for Jessie, the TV station... This would NEVER happen. I appreciate that Purcell acknowledges racism, racial tension, hate crimes into this story. I appreciate that she's trying to help foster conversation around these important issues. I just don't know if this lands right or rings true for me.

This was an okay read, not my favorite but thank you so much for the opportunity!

I gave up on this book at 20% completed. I could not stand how whiny and the inner dialogue of the main character. To me it was boring and very slow paced.

I received this as an ARC in exchange for a review.

I read the synopsis on Netgalley and was intrigued. honestly it took me awhile to get into the book because I was kind of put off by the writing style, but the story ended up pulling me in. it broke my heart a small bit and I ended up really liking this book!

Mini review:

DNF

I received this E-ARC via the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. I saw this book on Netgalley and liked the synopsis. So I requested it. Unfortunately it wasn't for me.

The writing style turned me off. And some of the wording was off. I liked how racial profiling was mentioned and racism. That was well done.

As I already know the ending I think everyone should read this. Highly recommend.

My pee lasts for thirty-two seconds. My record is a hundred and seven. I wonder if you count your pee. We never talk about this stuff, but we should. Bathroom habits are fascinating. When you get back, I expect answers about all things bathroom related.

Sadly, Jessie never got the chance to ask Chris bathroom related questions.

I wasn't sure about this book at first (Jess keeps saying "you" and I got reeeeaaalllyy confused. Turns out "you" means Chris. :P) but then I got absorbed in the story and OH WHAT A HEARTBREAKING BOOK.

Jessie's my favorite in my character in this book because she's super relatable. She likes the feeling of digging out eye crusties. I LOVE DIGGING OUT EYE CRUSTIES TOO IT'S SO SATISFYING

Chris is a really sweet and considerate guy and when he goes missing, Jess and her friends try to find him. Jessie believes that he is still alive, but some of his friends think he took his own life. I really didn't expect his friends to be right all along!

When Jessie finds out about Chris's death, she cries. I cried along with her. It's so sad and I couldn't help it.

Will recommend to anyone who loves mystery and YA contemporary. (Reminder: prepare box of tissues before reading.)

Final ratings:
Plot: 5 out of 5 - SUSPENSE
Characters: 5 out of 5 - Jess's friends are all so supportive and thoughtful. Love them!
Writing: 2 out of 5
Interest: 2 out of 5
The Feels and emotions: 5 out of 5
Ending: 5 out of 5

After Jesse and her boyfriend break up, he goes missing while out on a run. No one really suspects he's missing except Jesse, who goes on the hunt to find out what happened to him. As a narrator, Jesse is relatable, conveys emotion, and is a teenager dealing with a lot of stuff but her ability to seek out Chris (her boyfriend) also shows her strength and loyalty. She wasn't without imperfections or flaws, which made her seem all the more real.

The writing style was well done with decent pacing that kept me reading. Although there are hints throughout the book that point to what really happened to Chris, it's done well enough that it isn't obvious. The ending was unexpected.

Two points I didn't like: Chris's race was, in my opinion, too force/overdone. A character can African American without having it stated all the time and while he was the only African American in a white town, it seemed to bother Jesse more than the other residents, which didn't feel authentic for me. I lived in several small towns that weren't accustomed to diversity and more than one person was definitely uncomfortable.

My other issue is Jesse's regrets/hindsight reflecting. I've never know a single teen who ruminates over the past or reflects on regrets made. It just doesn't feel like something a teen does. Everything I have read about teens (including for my psych course) is that they don't really live in the past or future. They are typically NOW kind of people. Of course, not every teen fits this bill but still, it makes Jesse seem older than what she really is.

Otherwise, a beautifully written story with twists and turns that I genuinely loved.

On a Friday night one week before graduation, Chris Kirk goes out for a run and doesn’t return. Jessie, his girlfriend, tells the story of what happens next in a letter she writes to Chris. Multilayered storytelling keeps the reader turning pages. If you liked The First Time She Drowned or Lock and Key, you’ll like this

This is an amazing book. It is about a subject that is hard to talk about. Depression happens to anyone. Even someone who has everything to live for. The result of depression can be suicide. Which is what a star athlete, going to college on a scholarship, smart, genuine young man had going for him. His name is Chris.
I was so sad for what the friends and family were going through.
The characters are amazing. They could be classmates that were part of our lives. The sorrow described is genuine. You can definitely feel the anguish and heartache that each felt over the loss of Chris. No one wanted to believe he had taken his own life. Yet, everyone took some if the blame upon their shoulders. In the end, it was a decision Chris made. No one, not Jessie, his girlfriend, his best friends, his family, could have stopped him.
Wonderful read
5 Stars

"There's nothing. No sign of him anywhere."

Jessie's boyfriend Chris disappears one night while on a run, just after Jessie suggested they take a break from each other. Everyone thinks he is just another teenage runaway, but Jessie knows differently - and she's out to prove it and find him.

It has been a while since I have read a book that kept me so on-edge. Kim Purcell's This is Not a Love Letter is one of those books that I just couldn't put down. The suspense kept me hooked right from the beginning, and touched upon a lot of social issues that are very relevant in our society today. This book definitely will bring out a lot of emotion in readers, and I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys contemporary mystery or suspense books.

This Is Not A Love Letter is a mystery by Kim Purcell that is, in fact, written as a letter by the girlfriend a a missing teenage boy named Chris. Jessie takes readers on a wild ride as she tries to find Chris, and along the way she introduces readers to many possible suspects. This book was a quick read, and I enjoyed trying to figure out what happened to Chris. The characters were well developed and realistic, and the writing was engaging. Overall, I really enjoyed This is Not a Love Letter.

I almost didn't finish this book. I really wanted to put it down because I hated the point of view and the way it was done. But, I stuck with it, and the story kept me going. It's all about a girl named Jessie who tells her boyfriend, Chris, that they should take a break for a week, because he was getting too serious too fast. Then he disappears. Jessie and her friends look for him and eventually his mother calls the cops. Jessie is afraid that it was a hate crime. She thinks some guys that jumped him before might have done it again. Through out the book, she's talking to her boyfriend, telling him what he's missing and how much everyone is worried, how much she is worried. It's a mystery, going through this book, looking for Chris. Like I said, I almost didn't finish it, but the mystery kept me there.

This book deals with a lot of issues, racism, and bullying being the main topics. It also touches on mental illness, anxiety, depression, suicide. Jessie's mom is a hoarder. She's ashamed to let anyone into her house, and Jessie is the adult in the household. Her mom is usually passed out on sleep pills, leaving Jessie to pay the bills and do the shopping. Jessie is looked down upon for her looks and where she lives, so she seems like a very real, relatable character for me. I can remember specific incidents growing up where I was bullied because of where I lived. (Not that I lived anywhere awful. An old white house on a back road in Southern Kentucky.) It's real. Jessie is a great character and I really enjoyed reading about her and her struggles. She's the kind of person, I would be friends with.

If you want me to tell you if they ever found Chris… well, I'm not going to. Because you should read this book for yourself. And because maybe the mystery will be the only thing pulling you through the book? In the end, I'm glad I read it. While the beginning of the book nearly lost me, the last half of the book was very fast paced and I flew through it.

This is Not a Love Letter comes out in 2018 (Thanks NetGalley for an early review e-copy!)

This young adult book addresses many sensitive and timely topics. Written from the perspective of Jessie speaking to her missing boyfriend Chris, hence the title. When Chris goes missing many think he may have killed himself but Jessie is convinced that he's a victim of foul play. An emotional read but definitely one to read.

This Is Not a Love Letter by Kim Purcell is YA novel that grips you from the beginning and breaks your heart along the way. Jessie wakes up to the news that her boyfriend is missing. Convinced he did not run away, she endeavors to find him. Written in the form of a letter to her boyfriend, Chris, she details her efforts to find him along with her unspoken feelings, regrets, and memories.

Jessie was a character that the reader could relate to. She had her flaws but strengths as well. Her character is so well written, her hope becomes yours. The mystery behind Chris’ disappearance is also well done. I began to have my suspicions of the outcome because of well-placed clues, but they are not overt.

There were aspects of the plot that seemed overdone. The fact that Chris was an African American in a predominantly white town seemed to be an issue for Jessie only. The racial struggles that the book’s summary talk about are more forced into the story line.

The biggest downside to this novel is the language and the sexual references. The book has a wealth of wonderful messages, but to discuss these would be to give away the plot. My recommendation would be, if you are considering letting your teen read this novel, to read it before and discuss with them along the way.

I wasn't sure at first how I felt about this. The beginning started a bit slow, but once I got into it...wow. It was so intriguing but so heartbreaking all at the same time. Jessie was a good narrator, because her views of Chris and her own desire to change the possibilities of what might have happened to him clouded the reality of what was going on. I really liked that, and I liked that her own selfish teenage wants and needs shone through a lot, which rooted the story very much in the real world.

The ending was sad, but not unexpected to the reader. Jessie was the one in denial, but the hints and clues provided for the reader gave us a sense of what had really happened despite her insistence. With books like 13 Reasons Why being made into television shows and with the topic of suicide becoming even more mainstream, these sort of books are so important. The author did a great job of showing how people can hide their pain behind a smile, even managing to keep it hidden from those that know them best. People have secrets, we can never truly know who a person REALLY is at their core, and that was beautifully shown here. A really lovely effort, that I think will resonate with readers of varying ages!

This Is Not a Love Letter by Kim Purcell is a riveting story about the disappearance of Chris, a star high school athlete and its effect on his family, friends, and the whole community. It is told through his girlfriend's thoughts and words. During the search, his friends learn about his being bullied by fellow students as well as the hidden racial prejudice in the community. The days go by and his girlfriend becomes increasingly desperate and guilt ridden because she believes she caused him to run away. Her desperation makes this tragic story even more compelling and hard to put down..

This is Not a Love Letter is a heartbreaking read, and the tone of the whole novel is dark, even the flashback scenes to happier times. Know this going in - maybe not a beach summer read.

I loved Jessie's voice and found her to be full of nuance. The second person point of view was an interesting choice. I think it worked - it kept me guessing what would happen at the end. Because she was writing to Chris, I hoped he would be okay. Because of this, the ending was particularly heartbreaking.

With 13 Reasons Why in the news lately, conversations about suicide are more important than ever. This book will certainly add to that effort.