Cover Image: Raising the Dad

Raising the Dad

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I really love books about family dysfunction. Typically, they are told from the POV of the mother. This is such a cool view from the dad. Great job.

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Raising the Dad by Tom Matthews is a tough read for me because the premise of this family drama is just too far-fetched. Once the shock value of the secret passes, the book drags somewhat, becoming about reflections on the past more than present events. The ending is to me a forgone conclusion; it's just a matter of getting there. The darkness and sadness that looms over this family is the lingering memory from this book.

Read my complete review at http://www.memoriesfrombooks.com/2018/11/raising-dad.html

Reviewed for NetGalley.

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I struggled with this book. It's not a bad read, but, for me it's an 'OK, 2*' as it markets itself as a humorous look at a dysfunctional family and I just found it difficult to read. I didn't connect with the characters or storyline and found it a bit of a slog.

The lead character is really going through it, with a brother recently out of prison, a mother with dementia, a difficult teenage daughter and a marriage in trouble, but, apart from that, all is well! There are some really good bits in it and it may be that the writing just wasn't my style. However, overall, it wasn't for me.

Thanks to Netgalley and the publishers for the opportunity to preview.

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I could not get into this book. Just too much to try and assume/believe to make the story work. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and the publisher for the ARC of this book. Although I received the book in this manner, it did not affect my opinion of this book nor my review.

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This was an ok book. The characters were realistic and it was a good story. Just something makes me not like it more.

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2.5 stars rounded up. I was invited to read free and early by Net Galley and St. Martin’s Press, which is one of my favorite publishers. It looked promising; original and, the teaser said, “brutally funny” in places. I wanted to like it, but yet.

The title is a play on words (raising the dead, raising the dad, get it?) I didn’t realize it at the outset or I might have dodged it. “Dad” was declared dead many years ago. He was not going to make it, and everyone agreed to turn off the machines and let him go in peace. The widow believes she is a widow, but the fact is, he’s still alive.

What happens when a patient is brain-dead and you turn off the machinery and the patient continues to live? What if he lives a long, long time?

The question provides a great premise—though the particulars here are far-fetched-- but if it had been my choice, the pitch and the cover would have been different. This is a gritty, dramatic topic, and the cover shouts that this is going to be a light, fun read. Oh reader, it really isn’t. There are some funny moments, mostly involving the protagonist’s badly behaved brother, Mike, but they aren’t enough to keep the story from being a grim, miserable grind.

When my confidence in a galley flags, I go to Goodreads to see what other early reviewers have to say. At least one other reviewer argued convincingly that although most of the story is slow and unpleasant, the last 100 pages are brilliant and illuminate the reason for the rest of the story being as it is. Because of this, I soldiered my way through to the 70% mark, waiting for genius to reveal itself. But for me, that train never arrived at the station though I was well into the denouement, and with a mixture of relief and disappointment, I gave myself permission to abandon the journey.

This book is for sale now, but it is not a good choice for a Father’s Day gift. Trust me.

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Raising the Dad by Tom Matthews is a recommended drama featuring a dysfunctional family in an unimaginable situation.

John Husted's family is struggling. The doctor for his mother, Rose, has diagnosed her with Alzheimer's. His older brother, Mike, a ne'er-do-well drug abusing rocker, has just been released from prison. His marriage of seventeen years to Robin has become a stale, routine. His daughter Katie is hanging out with a moody, fatalistic group at her high school. To add to the stress, John, a grant proposal writer for a nonprofit group, is falling behind on his job.

When an old friend of his father wants to meet with John at a familiar restaurant across the street from the hospital that he and John's father helped found, he agrees. John's father Dr. Lawrence Husted, had a debilitating stroke thirty years ago and died. Since then, his family has been struggling. What the old doctor shares with John is unbelievable, overwhelming, and places John in an inconceivable situation. What his family believed about his father's death isn't exactly the truth. Now John's stress levels are increasing and he must decide what to tell his family about the new revelations.

The writing is good and Matthews does address the history of the family and the struggles they have encountered over the years since their father's stroke. The characters are developed, and background information is disclosed. Their relationship with the family patriarch is portrayed realistically, helping to set up the conflicts and exposed buried emotions. The characters make the novel worthwhile. There is growth and development. There is change.

The actual situation that the family finds themselves in, however, is truly unbelievable and, well, preposterous. In a farce, I could go with it, but this isn't written as a satire so it was a struggle for me to accept the situation. There is a story here and the interaction between the characters is worth the read, but you will have to overlook the impossible in the novel.

Disclosure: My review copy was courtesy of St. Martin's Press.
http://www.shetreadssoftly.com/2018/04/raising-dad.html
https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/2365646479
https://www.librarything.com/work/20552666/reviews/155098624
https://www.facebook.com/shetreadssoftly/
https://twitter.com/SheTreadsSoftly/status/986683042755473408

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A sweet story about relationships and understanding when you are ready to let someone go.

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This book was not a good fit for me so in fairness to the authorI am not publishing my review.

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Stick with this one. John's got a LOT on his plate, what with his mom descending into dementia, his marriage is a mess, his daughter is a teen, and his brother Mike just got out of prison. Then there's a twist - and John has to make some very hard decisions. The twist is more than a bit implausible but if you go with it, it will make you think about what you would do in the same situation. Not everyone in this book is likable (including John) but that's how families are. Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC. Try this for a dysfunctional family story that, well, read it and find out.

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This book paints itself as a humorous look at a dysfunctional family. But the humor seems to be lacking to my eyes.

John Husted, at age 43, is made privy to a secret that upends his life. He’s already struggling with his immediate family - a tired marriage, a belligerent teenage daughter, a brother recently out of prison and his mother slipping into dementia. And now, this…

Unfortunately, the premise of the book is totally unbelievable. And it also just felt flat. I just finished another book about caregiving that touched all my emotions. This one just didn’t. Yes, the book gets somethings right. Like what to tell a parent suffering from dementia and what to let slide. Or trying to make the numbers work on the finances when you’re dealing with the costs of multiple generations. But the scenes that made me actually feel something were few and far between. And I never did see any trace of real humor. I found myself rushing the pages. It gets slightly better at the end, but it was a long, slow slog to get there.

My thanks to netgalley and Thomas Dunne Books for an advance copy of this book.

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I tried to keep going with this book but it's subject matter relates to some very personal issues that I could not overcome. To say it begs belief is an understatement

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This is a very modern book, with a modern family. A dying marriage, a teenager running with the wrong crowd and a sick parent...these are all familiar themes. John Husted then has to deal with his brother who has recently been released from prison....

There's long buried secrets, a family falling apart at the seams...

This is real life - in a very well written fictional setting.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read this fabulous book.

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I tried. I was intrigued by the blurb, and the opening bits were fine. But I just could not get past the bizarre premise, especially when coupled with the increasingly flat-affect protagonist and the insanely selfish older brother. I made it about a third of the way through, and just could not even pretend to care what happened to any of them any more and had to call it just not for me...

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I looked forward to reading Tom Matthews' novel based on its introduction. However, I did not enjoy the book. The story was just too far-fetched for me. Matthews has a skillful way with words, so I look forward to his next effort.

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What a strange story. How would you react to finding out your Father wasn't dead, but in a vegetative state for the last 30 years? How does someone process that information?

This book was heartbreaking and tender at the same time. A good exploration of what it really means to be a family. It was nice to see Mike's character grow up and give his bratty niece a what for. I thought the author was going to leave Mike as a jerk character so was pleasantly surprised to see him stand up and do something unselfish.

I enjoyed this book.

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This was an interesting read. The story follows John Husted as he learns to cope with his mothers looming Alzheimers, his slowly crumbling marriage, his junkie brother recently released from jail and an old family secret that suddenly re-appears. Slowly and surprisingly with the help of his brother, John is able to keep his family together and somehow they come out better for it.

Tom Matthews is clearly a gifted writer. I have no complaints about his writing style, I just could not get into the story he was telling. It seemed to move along very slowly and I felt let down by the ending. There seemed to be a slow build up and not enough pay off. Thank you to NetGalley for providing an ARC for review.

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The book is very well written and the author pulls the storyline together. It just seemed too much of a fantasy for me. I just couldn't finish it for that reason,

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An extremely unique premise, I found the story to be thoughtful. Overall, it is a story about family, memories and truth. John is a great character and the story moves smoothly. Despite the far fetched premise, it felt honest because of the strong character development.

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