Cover Image: How to Properly Dispose of Planet Earth

How to Properly Dispose of Planet Earth

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Member Reviews

Absurd, Surreal, Fascinating

Most middle grade sci-fi books are earnest and fairly predictable, even those that lean heavily on fantasy and the implausible. This book, though, heads in an entirely different direction, opting for an almost Dada approach to telling its story. The book isn't "wacky" or farty or silly in the usual sense. Rather, it is stone cold committed to humor, whimsy, nonsense, spontaneity, and irrationalism - the touchstones of true Dada. I dug it.

There is no point in trying to summarize the plot, especially since this is the middle book in the series and starts off with no real summary or preamble. We begin with a middle school hero who has to shave three times a day, a multiverse hopping lizard, a megalomaniacal grandmother, a ninja psychic sister, a ruthless klepto evil sister, black holes, time travel, a father whose inventions are banned throughout the universe, a big cast of secondary characters, and aliens shaped like Easter Island statues. Rev that up to twice the speed of the usual middle grade book. Add slamming doors, hidden identities, and the pace of a French farce. It all comes together to make no sense and absolutely perfect sense.

All of that said, though, it seems fair to observe that the audience for this book probably requires readers who are very tolerant of ambiguity and are willing to be patient as plot points and twists become clear. The tale doesn't always proceed in a strictly linear fashion, and none of that is helped by the fact that our hero, Hap, often starts out a scene in the dark about what's happening exactly. There are a lot of cryptic conversations, and maybe too much "I'll explain it all later when we have more time", and that can be frustrating for younger readers, including me. On the other hand, the book has enough rewards and great moments that it's probably worth a try by most any youngster who likes sci-fi adventure, or who has a taste for kid friendly bizarro lit.

(Please note that I received a free ecopy of this book without a review requirement, or any influence regarding review content should I choose to post a review. Apart from that I have no connection at all to either the author or the publisher of this book.)

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How to Properly Dispose of Planet Earth by Paul Noth is an enjoyable book about 11-year-old Happy "Hap" Conklin navigating the ups and downs of middle school, while saving Earth from destruction. When Hap accidentally opens up a black hole from our world to another, he and his sister must find a way to prevent Earth from being sucked into it. But when Hap is transported through the black hole and lands in a different, futuristic world, he finds out that his Grandma has been hiding out and is plotting to take over the galaxy.

The book is a sequel to How to Sell Your Family to the Aliens, which I didn't read, but I just went with it. If I had read the previous book, it may have helped me understand the characters a little better. The entertaining illustrations, also by Paul Noth, help tell the story which readers should enjoy.

All in all, I think this book was good. There is a lot of humor, action and suspense, but just when things get really interesting, it ends with a dissatisfying cliffhanger. I will be interested in reading the next book to see how things pan out! I would recommend this series to grades 3-5 and to fans Stick Dog by Tom Watson or Timmy Failure by Stephan Pastis.

Thank you to NetGalley and Bloomsbury Children’s Books for this E-ARC. Opinions are entirely my own.

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I had a ton of fun reading How to Properly Dispose of Planet Earth. It was different from most of the stories I have read lately. It was a tale shrouded in mystery and took me on an exciting adventure. Hap had a mystery to solve, and was unsure where to begin. As this tale came to a close, it is clear that things may only get worse from here.

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Thanks to NetGalley and this Bloomsbury for allowing an advanced look at this book.

Hap Conklin is an imaginative student who completes his lessons and takes them a step beyond.

Disappointed at the turn it story takes when grandma disciplines the emperor, I would suggest this mode of punishment be changed.

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"How to Properly Dispose of Planet Earth" is the middle-school fantasy sequel to "How to Sell Your Family to the Aliens". I didn't realize that this book was a sequel when I began. I probably wouldn't have read this book or I would have gone back to read "How to Sell Your Family to the Aliens". I found this book to be very confusing haven't not read the first book.

This is the story of Happy Conklin Jr. and his family, some of who are bent on world domination. His grandmother is at large after trying to rule the universe. His grandmother is the hero of his sister Alice, who is an evil villain wannabe, who created a black hole, and is determined to go back to it. His sister Kayla, is able to see into the future and it's multiverse, with some limitations. Happy also has a pet lizard called Squeep! who is traveling back to the black hole, even though they believed that portal had been destroyed. Happy and Kayla work together to foil Alice, try to figure out what Squeep! is doing, and prevent general destruction of Planet Earth.

I did not care for this story because it was so complicated and I didn't think the characters were well developed. It focused more on traveling to another dimension, Kayla's abilities, and other "action" that who the characters were and why they acted the way they did. Happy's parents are uninterested and dismissive of Happy's problems and his sister Alice is a cruel villain who even the teachers are afraid to cross. I think it was supposed to be funny and a little sarcastic, but to me it came off as creepy and I think it might be a little scary to kids.

Thank you to NetGalley for my complimentary copy in return for my honest opinion.

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This looked like a really fun, adventure filled sci-Fi book about a 10 year old boy named Happy. But unfortunately I spent a lot of my time trying to figure out who the characters were, especially since it was so full of action and adventure. This story had a lot going on from magical lizards to a black hole at Happy’s middle school.
I did not realize this was the second book in a series when I started it. If I had read “How to Sell Your Family to the Aliens” first, it may have been easier for me to follow, but as a stand alone I would not recommend it.
However, I was impressed with the illustrations and some parts of the story were really entertaining. If I had been familiar with these characters, or they were introduced more in the beginning I would have enjoyed it much more.
Thank you to NetGalley and Bloomsbury USA Children’s Books for this advanced copy, my opinions are my own. This book will be published January 15th, 2019.

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Noth's book is zany, quick-paced, and imaginative, but completely nonsensical if you have not read the first book. There is little to no character development and you feel like you've been dropped into the middle of a conversation. This is not an entirely bad thing, but can be unsettling for some readers. Hap Conklin is dealing with sixth-grade, trying to find the confidence to ask Nev to be his science partner, and has to prevent the end of the world. It starts in the middle of a conversation, and leaves off in the middle of another one. It does not feel complete, which is fine since its a series, but personally I like to have a little closure, then a door to the rest of the main story arc (his grandmother) be left open. Felt rushed. Overall, it was quiet an entertaining read.

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