I tried reading this one but had to DNF due to the way the story was formatted especially the way it kept going back to flashbacks. I didn't realize it was a novel in verse. I would've liked the in verse part if it flowed a little bettter

Every Body Looking by Candice Iloh // ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️💫

Thank you @penguinteen for providing me with an eARC via @netgalley. Every Body Looking comes out 9/22!

TW: abuse, sexual abuse

This book, written in verse, has been described as reminiscent of Elizabeth Acevedo’s work, and it really is. The narrative is beautifully told in rich, descriptive verses, alternating in time between Ada’s childhood and her time at Howard University. The novel deftly explores Ada’s upbringing as a first-generation Nigerian-American, her complex relationships with both parents, the weight of her family’s cultural and religious expectations, as well as her childhood traumas and the effects of those traumas as she grew up. I especially loved the scenes detailing her first semester at Howard, which accurately describe the nuances of how it feels to leave the house, become independent, and begin the journey of self-discovery that can only happen when you are out in the world on your own. This was a wonderful debut, and I highly recommend it to fans of YA novels in verse.

Loved Ada's character. Loved the way it was told in verse. Loved the themes and identities that the author sought to explore. Ultimately, it didn't feel fully fleshed out and I thought it lacked a satisfying conclusion. The kind of first book that makes you interested to see what comes next.

This is a beautiful coming of age story in verse. Be aware that it does talk about abuse and sexuality, but was all handled well. Ada is a beautiful character and I liked watching her transform and grow. Kind of heartbreaking but a much needed book.

Thank you NetGalley for this ARC!

Ada’s life so far has been about living up to her Nigerian father’s expectations, making it through high school, and contending with her mother’s volatile presence. Now she’s off to college, on her own for the first time, and has to reconcile who she’s been taught to be and who she really wants to be. Scenes from her past that were pivotal for creating her present are interspersed with the rest of the story, giving readers a better picture of why being who she is feels so difficult.

This is a novel in verse, and I have to argue for reading it in print, rather than on an e-reader or an app. The arrangement on the page is important, serving where punctuation would in prose, as well as conveying additional details about how each poem should be approached, and it’s very easy to lose that as you mess around with font size on your e-reader. Overall, the rhythm of the verse drives the story very well, and I’m not sure if the exceptions I encountered were deliberate, an artifact of reading an e-ARC, or something else. This won’t be a book for everyone, but it definitely resonated with me.

I received a copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley for an honest review.

“that I’m too loud
too much
too free”

Every Body Looking is sort of a coming of age and coming into yourself while also trying to live up to family expectations and cultural expectations. I have actually never read a story like this written in verse, and while it took me a minute to really catch on to the flow or maybe even the freeness of verse, I eventually fell in love. Ada is the daughter of an immigrant father and an African-American mother. Her mother suffers from addiction and her father has placed heavy expectations on his first born daughter.

I loved this story because it is a journey. Where Ada finds herself in her culture, but also struggles with being herself because of cultural expectations placed on her by her father. I love the way that freedom is shown from freedom as a middle schooler and getting to just dance and be yourself for an hour, then having to hide who you are. Then the jump to being in college and really having that freedom to find yourself and then actually be yourself.

This is just an amazing story. It’s beautiful and at times it’s tough, but it also has that level of realness and relatability even if you were raised with a different upbringing.

I recommend this to anyone looking for a poetic coming of age from an own-voice author!

Ada is a character who is learning to see herself through her own eyes. For her entire life, she has tried to be what others want her to be. A respectful and religious daughter for her father. An unconditionally loving daughter for her mother. A studious scholar for colleges and a submissive beauty for men. The desires of others have always come before her own best interest and her dreams for the future.

In Candice Iloh's exceptional novel in verse, Ada is constantly trying to fit into the boxes of other people's expectations. There are moments when she tries to break free, but the eyes of others seem always to be watching. Always judging.

When Ada moves away to attend college at an HBCU, she believes things might be different. The people here do not know her, so they shouldn't have expectations of how she should look or behave. She should be able to be herself. The problem is, Ada has worked so hard to suppress her own feelings and personality that it is hard for her to find herself and she slips into old patterns.

Sometimes finding oneself is the most difficult search of all.

A fantastic debut novel in verse tells the story of Ada--daughter of a Nigerian father who immigrated to the US and an African American mother. The story toggles between present day college Ada at Howard University, a HBCU and her childhood years. It's a story of growing to love yourself, your body and your own unique voice. Ada faces the struggles of many first/second generation kids and the heavy expectations set on us to achieve. We're constantly reminded of the sacrifices our parents have made and it's imperative we do right by them and achieve whatever they want for us. But among us are artists, writers, dancers, dreamers who don't want a traditional job trajectory or college major and there's sometimes a tension between our desires and a conflicting expectation to make our parents proud by doing the "right" thing. I loved all the dance references in this book. Raising a dancer and being a lover of dance myself, I deeply felt the way Ada connected with her body through dancing and movement. I just wish I could have seen Magic on paper!! This book really nailed the feelings of starting college for sure. Brought me right back to my first year of college as well. If you love Elizabeth Acevedo, I'd pick this one up - no doubt there will be many comparisons between these books in verse from women of color!

Actual Rating: 4.5 stars

Every Body Looking is a hard-hitting coming of age story told in verse that creeps up on you and kind of rips your heart out. Please use caution and check trigger/content warnings if needed because this was much more intense than I had anticipated, but I think this will strike a chord with a lot of people. Note that this review does contain "spoilers" due to discussing abuse and sexuality in the book. If you're sensitive to spoilers, be aware.

Ada is the daughter of a Nigerian immigrant and an African American woman, her mom struggling with an unnamed mental illness as she comes in and out of her life. The book goes back and forth across multiple timelines, adding context to what is happening and the things Ada is struggling through. At the beginning she is graduating from high school and much of the book is set during her first semester of college, with sections flashing back to first grade, second grade, sixth grade, and high school as we see the trauma and difficult life experiences Ada has gone through. This includes being molested by a family member as a six-year-old, and then we see the ramifications of that into adulthood. Like I said, it's an intense one, but it's also a book about healing, freedom, and being unafraid to step into who you really are.

Part of Ada's journey is coming to terms with her sexuality after growing up in a deeply religious and conservative household. Content warnings for a brief scene of sexual exploration with another girl at 7 years old, and while childhood sexual abuse often results in early sexual behavior and acting out as a response to trauma, I wish the author had addressed that in a more nuanced way. It reads like an indication that perhaps Ada isn't really straight, which may be true but the reasons for that happening at such a young age are more complex and are related to the abuse she experienced. Especially as this is a book for young people, I wanted to see this talked about on some level.

That said, in general I found this to be compelling and I felt deeply for Ada. I think this does a fantastic job of capturing what going away to college for the first time is like. You're away from family, discovering new parts of yourself, contending with a possibly changing worldview, and perhaps learning that you don't want to do or be what you thought or what your family expected of you. It's a time of transition and often emotionally difficult experiences that can be transformative if allowed to be. It's nice to see a YA novel that is addressing this critical period. I received an advance copy of this book for review via NetGalley. All opinions are my own.

Content warnings include child molestation by a relative (on page, main character), sexual touching between young girls, incurred fatphobia, traumatic experience with a gynecological exam, college sexual experiences of dubious consent, male characters engaging in misogynistic and sexually manipulative dialogue.

Loved this novel-in-verse about Ada, a Nigerian American girls trying to find herself at college, an HBCU. Recommend for teens.

Review posted on GoodReads (September 9, 2020)
Review Linked.

4/5 stars!

A huge thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Young Readers Group for sending me an E-ARC for an honest review.

The moment I heard about this book, I wanted to pick it up and read it. When I found out it was written in poetry, I got even more excited because I have been wanting to pick up more poetry this year. This book is beautifully written. I was immediately pulled into the story, and I found myself really taking my time while reading this book in order to really enjoy the text and emotions that the story brought up. This is a very powerful and gorgeous story, and I really recommend this book!

Thanks for reading!
Caden

This is beautifully written story about finding yourself, and the importance of having something to call your own. I love that it is written in verse. You can feel the emotion within the author’s words and rhythm as you read. There were times where I was not a fan of the non-linear timeline so I appreciate that each section was labeled. Thank you Penguin Teen for this gifted copy!

CW - molestation, homophobia, verbal abuse, alcohol use, mental health awareness

Rating: 4/5 🌟
Author: Candice Iloh
Publisher: Dutton Books
Release Date: 9/22/20
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I want to start by saying a huge thank you to Penguin Teen for the review copy of Every Body Looking.
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I throughly enjoyed this book. It is written in verse , which is a style that I really like but don’t read enough of. It started of slow but began to pick up about 1/4 of the way through. I love Ada’s character. The book is written from her a POV. She has been through so much. I loved seeing her growth , throughout the book. I think what I loved most about Ada was her passion for dance, and her determination to become better at it. Every Body Looking is a wonderful coming of age story. I was able to finish it in one sitting , but I also couldn’t put it down. Every Body Looking is out 9/22/20 , I recommend it for fans of contemporary, coming of age, and verse style writing. There is a trigger warning I would like to mention, it evolves sexual assault of a minor. I will not go into detail here but , Ada revisits this trauma while in college, when she goes to the OBGYN for the first time.

To be transparent, I read this book in preparation for a podcast interview through my work, and I found Candice Iloh to be wonderful to speak with.

Every Body Looking is part of (what I think) is a recent trend of YA books in verse, and interestingly, each page can stand alone as its own poem (learned that in my interview.)

Ada, the main character, is a young Nigerian-American teen beginning her new life in college, and she's all kinds of confused about her place in the world, which is compounded by a difficult past that includes an absent mother, complicated feelings about her father's faith, and an incident of abuse. What Ada loves is sure about is dance, but she doesn't feel like she can share this with her dad.

The chapters alternate between the present as Ada enters college and her childhood, giving glimpses into the events that shaped her. Sometimes I found this effective, but other times I admit I got a little confused. The book covers a lot of territory and given that novels in verse are sparse, it might have benefited from more focus. Still, a strong debut.

Unfortunately I was unable to download this book, but I will give it a high star rating based on what I've heard about it and my excitement level to get it after pub day.

Ada’s high school graduation is a big deal for her Nigerian immigrant family, but Ada still feels uncomfortable with her stepmom, and her bio-mom can’t tame her own demons long enough to put Ada first and enjoy the day. Freedom beckons as Ada starts freshman year at an HBCU, but flashbacks to her complicated childhood provide insight into why Ada has signed up to study subjects that are of no interest to her, why she allows herself to be objectified by a boy on the basketball team, and why she finally finds a way to explore her identity and express herself in dance.

Told in verse, the characters spring to life - unreliable mom, demanding dad who tries his best to help Ada with the tools he has access to, the aunt from Nigeria who is a strong link to heritage but manages to simultaneously build up and tear down. Encourage high school students to read this with a partner so they can talk about
Ada’s choices and predict where freedom will take her. EARC from NetGalley.

Please note: This is not a review. I was unable to read this title because it was not available for Kindle download. Due to a medical issue I cannot read for extended periods on a computer or phone. After realizing the book was downloading to my phone and not going to my kindle, I cancelled the download. I will be reading this once it is released because I am very interested in the story. Unfortunately, this feedback could not be submitted without a star rating, so I selected 2 stars.

I absolutely loved this book. This is the first novel I've ever read that was written in verse and I was not disappointed. Following Ada on her journey on figuring out what she wants out of life and who she is, was beautiful. So many important topics such as what it means to truly love your body and what the stress of being perfect from family can do. One of my favorite moments was when Ada questioned her faith and even said why was pulling strength from herself not enough? This part of the book made me cry a bit because I remember so distinctly having these similar feelings. Some lessons I took away from the messy but beautiful life of Ada is: It’s okay to feel lost, It’s okay to create your own path, you are allowed to be in control of your body and space, building friendships isn't always easy but your people are out there, and you deserve to feel as though your body is magic. I hope everyone considers picking this book up and I can NOT wait to be able to purchase this to become part of my collection. Thank you Candice Iloh, this was exactly what I needed.

Quote I loved: “and everytime I learn my body is mine. And everytime I learn my body’s wishes, are my command”

Deep Dive review coming soon to my youtube channel!

honestly, this book made me feel seen in so many aspects and i just have SO much love for it. this book is so special, powerful, raw, and unfiltered. it's a look into challenging what you've been taught growing up, and learning to forge your own ideas about the world and the way you fit within it. it's about appreciating and understanding your culture while being aware of it in the context of society. and above all this is a book about being true to yourself

I found it difficult to get invested in this story. I liked Ada a lot, and I thought there were a lot of interesting and heartbreaking threads and story elements, but it felt a little messy. Of course - life is messy, so I can understand the intention behind that, but it didn't work for me. This book is written in free verse; there were times when this worked and times when it didn't and just felt like prose with more line breaks.

The book goes back and forth between the beginning of Ada's freshman year of college and non-linear flashbacks. I sometimes lost track of how old she was until I realized the grade she was in was along the side of each page (which wasn't until I was almost done with the book, but it may be more obvious in the print version). I found that these flashbacks sometimes made it more difficult for me to connect with "present day" Ada, because I kept getting pulled out of her story. I felt like I could have put the book down halfway through and not picked it up again and I wouldn't have spent any time wondering what happened to Ada. That being said, I liked the ending and am glad I finished it.

I can see why this book would really speak to some people and why there are plenty of five star reviews for it, but it just wasn't for me.