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Grendel's Guide to Love and War

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Member Reviews

This was such a refreshing read. The narrative was really wonderful and the characters really made this book special.
Grendel's Guide to Love and War started off great. Even from the first few pages, I really loved it. I don't often find books that made me laugh out loud but Grendel's Guide did. The first or second chapter had me laughing like crazy.
The main character, Tom Grendel, was so well written and such a wonderful person. His father is a veteran and suffers from PTSD and Tom was so willing to take care of him. This book had realistic family dynamics and I really appreciated that.

Overall, this was a great read. I loved the characters and the representation of PTSD. It's very well written and the plot was really fun.

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There were so many parts of this book that I enjoyed that I would’ve rated this higher had it not been for the parts that irked me. Tom Grendel is such an interesting character who is constantly seeking to know people on a deeper level, refusing to just skim the surface. He spends a great deal of his free time interviewing his elderly neighbours not as a school project, like many often assumed, but as a means of capturing the stories and memories of people who won’t be around much longer to share them. His devotion to this projection, coupled with his interactions with his eccentric sister Zipora (more affectionately known as Zip), his witty friend Ed and his introspective and PTSD-riddled father, made me really like this story.

I found myself chuckling during most of Tom and Ed’s conversations because together, those boys are quite the dynamic duo! Tom and Zipora have a typical brother-sister relationship that involves some bickering and giving each other a hard time, but you can certainly see how deeply they care for one another and will go the distance for each other. Tom and Zip’s father is away for a majority of the book, but the lengths that Tom goes through to make sure his father is happy is so endearing and you can see that though his father doesn’t talk much, he loves Tom very much.

While I have endless amounts of praise for Tom, Zip and Ed, I have a great deal of contempt for the other young characters in this story. Tom’s new (but also former) neighbours, sibling Rex and Willow Rothgar and their cousin Wolf, were the downfall of this story for me. While a great deal of the plot centres around “taking down” Wolf and Rex, I could’ve completely done without them. The part of the plot that focuses on ending those two made the story feel so much more superficial than it could’ve been. The first half of the book, which focuses on these annoying, non-stop parties at the Rothgar’s, took me so long to get through, whereas the latter half of the book, which delves deeper into the reasons behind Tom’s neighbour interviews and his memories of his deceased mom, took me less than a day. And don’t even get me started on Willow Rothgar and her lacklustre, forced-but-basically-non-existent romance with Tom. She makes it a point to tell Tom “I’m not your manic pixie dream girl” and yet acts exactly like that. Her character felt very reminiscent of Alaska from John Green’s Looking for Alaska, another character whose attempts at manufacturing depth of character led to her coming off as aloof and shallow. Willow does not treat Tom with the level of respect that he gave her.

When I began the book, it felt as though it was definitely on track for being a 5-star read for me. And there are so many parts of this book that I love! I hate that there’s also such a huge part of it that I don’t love. I think if I were to reread this, going into it with a slightly different mindset, I could possibly get over my strong dislike of Wolf, Rex, and Willow. I would know what I was getting into with those three. Overall, I will say that this book was good and that it started and ended strongly, though the middle could’ve been stronger.

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Tom Grendel was one of the few residents in his quiet neighborhood, who was under the age of 60. He led a quiet life providing gardening services to all the fine widows of his community and recording their life stories. This was the perfect residence for Grendel and his father, an Army veteran, who was suffering from PTSD, UNTIL the Rothgars moved in next door. In an unneighborly fashion, Rex and Wolf threw very loud blow-out parties EVERY night. As he tried to maintain his father's sanity, Tom plotted to thwart their party efforts, and thus, the prank war was born.

"My life had exactly three phases: before Mom, after Mom but before Dad/Iraq, and my current post-Dad/Iraq period. Frankly, I hoped this phase would go on for a while. I wasn't really up for many more defining moments."

First and foremost, this book was so much fun. The characters were witty. The banter was whip-smart, and I laughed heartily and often. But, it wasn't all just fun and games, there was a lot of really deep and heartfelt stuff in there too. The whole premise, that Tom wanted to eradicate the threat to his father. He wanted to protect the only parent he had left. I often found a lump in my throat, whenever the subject arose. He felt this immense pressure to be the perfect son, so as to reduce his father's stress. It was a heavy weight for a a 17-year-old, who was dealing with his own issues, to bear.

"Here's the thing. You can't pull any more stunts like you pulled today. Do you understand me? In a couple of hours we're going to send him home and you need to be a model kid from here on out."

The prank war was pretty hilarious. It was rooted in the best intentions, but it escalated to an obscene level quite quickly. At first, it was just Ed and Tom doing battle against the Rothgars, but then Tom's sister, Zipora, joins the ranks and she has a score to settle with Wolf.

"And then," I said, miming an explosion with my hands, "guile."
"Does guile involve jazz hands?"
"Those were not jazz hands. That was an explosion."

I am all about the characters in a story, and Kaplan provided us with a wonderful group of characters. Tom was an adorable and lovable MC. He was a good neighbor, friend, brother, and son. He was quirky, funny, loyal, honest, and tenderhearted. I just wanted to scoop him up and give him a great big hug.

"The human mind," Zip said seriously, "is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. It's a veritable turducken of unknowability."

Tom's immediate social circle was rather small, but rather awesome. His sister Zipora was this complex, funny, hot-mess. She was grappling with her own issues, but she was learning from her mistakes and taking steps to improve her situation. The other important person is Tom's life was Ed. The bromance between this two was one for the ages. From there "meet cute" to how Ed was just always just a phone call away, this was a friendship which all people should strive for.

"They stood with walkers, canes, and orthopedic shoes, and as one, they were pissed."

I. Loved. Tom's. Neighbors. There was just such a genuine bond between him and his ladies. He looked after them, but they also looked after him. It was very sweet the way he would come to their aid and they way they came to his.

"I think you are absolutely dead strange, Tom."
"And?"
"And I like that you're dead strange."
I laughed. "I am not your manic pixie dream boy, Willow Rothgar. I serve only myself."

There was a little bit of romance going on there between Willow and Tom. He had been pining for her for several years, and she was finally reciprocating. They shared some very special and tender moments, and I thought Kaplan made an interesting statement with where she brought that romance.

Overall: A fun and touching story of a boy's journey as he works through his grief, as he reconnects with his father, as he tries to preserve his mother's memory, filled with laugh-out-loud pranks, and some amazing friends to help him along the way.

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This book is everything that is right about YA. I absolutely loved this reworking of Beowulf. The adventures and plots were fun and crazy, together with the perfect amount of angst, the all important first love, and my new favorite best friend in a YA novel, Ed. So many laugh out loud moments, but also moments that tugged at your heart and made the characters so easy to relate to and empathize with. I had more fun with this book than I have in a long time and truly enjoyed every second of it.

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This was such a nice surprise! This is one of those books I requested on Netgalley impulsively because it sounded good and like something I might enjoy. I didn't really expect much of it but I was thrilled when I got approved. So I started reading it and then I ended up loving it quite a bit. I do love it when that happens. Though this might not be a new super-favorite and it didn't really wow me or anything, I still enjoyed it a whole lot. So let's get into it shall we?

Grendel's Guide to Love and War tells the story of Tom Grendel and his dad, who suffers from post-war PTSD. They live a quiet life and everything seems fine until their new neighbors move in and disturb the peace. Literally. Tom has had a crush on the girl, Willow, for quite some time now but can't really get along with her older brother Rex. And now that their mom is out of town a lot, Rex uses it to his advantage by throwing very loud parties that trigger Tom's dad's PTSD. So naturally, Tom goes into war-mode and will try anything to try and stop Rex's parties.

I had so much fun with this story, but there was a lot more to it and I loved that. Because it could've easily been a simple prank-war and gotten very silly very fast. But there was a lot of heart in this story too. It punched me in the feels almost as much as it made me laugh. Which was a lot. It was very balanced to me and even the romance never really controlled the plot, which is nice. It really is. Though, I do think some of the stuff that happens in this book could never happen in real life? Like, they wouldn't get away with this for so long you know? I do think people are capable of doing stuff like that because people are sometimes not very nice. But it just seemed a tad unrealistic that it took so long for the cops to really do something about the problem. But I do love how this book handled PTSD and grief. It was very respectful and romance didn't cure anything. Points for that!

I loved the characters! All of them. Well maybe not Rex or Wolf... they were... not nice. To be polite. Like... they were actually kind of major jerks and very disrespectful. But the sad thing is, that this is actually realistic because there are people like that. I was never completely sure about Willow? I liked her... but I never really connected to her. But she was kind of cool and sweet and the first time we see her in the book she has her hair in a messy bun and is wearing a Ravenclaw shirt, so #win. I LOVED Zipora, Tom's sister. She was sweet and kind of silly and crazy and kind of a mess in some ways but also awesome and yay sibling love! OH and major shout out to the old people living in Tom's neighborhood. They were the best!

My favorite two characters were, of course Tom and his best friend Ed. Their friendship is totally an epic bromance and I LOVED it. They were such great friends to each other. I love friendships like this in books. Ed was such a cool character. He's Korean and he likes wine and wants to dedicate his future to it and everything and he was funny and awesome and a great friend to Tom and I adore him. Tom is a fantastic MC. I rooted for him and I felt for him and I simply want to hug him because he's kind of very precious. He's sweet and funny and kind of a bit dorky and silly and impulsive, but also very smart. He interviews all of the old people in the neighborhood, collecting their life stories because he just likes knowing people very well. And he loves gardening and he's just precious. Because he's also still not over his mother's death and is dealing with his dad's PTSD too. So he just needed a hug, really. I love him. A lot.

So in the end I enjoyed this book a whole lot. It's fun and made me laugh out loud quite a few times but it's also very heartfelt and handles PTSD and grief beautifully. This is definitely a YA Contemporary you should check out if you can.

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