As a gay man who has lived with body dysmorphia for as long as I can remember, I came to this book with high hopes but also with a degree of caution. So often, books that touch on eating, body image, or health either simplify the story or leave me feeling erased. What Daniel has done here is something completely different. He manages to honour the full messiness of lived experience as a gay man, while also weaving in research, reflection, and compassion.

What struck me most is that he doesn’t claim to have "the" answer. Instead, he opens up a conversation, one that acknowledges complexity, contradiction, and the fact that no single framework captures the whole truth of how queer men live in and with our bodies. That humility is powerful, because it leaves space for readers like me to locate ourselves in the narrative, rather than feeling told what we “should” be doing or thinking.

The writing is generous, thoughtful, and brave. At times it’s raw, but it never feels sensationalist. Daniel’s willingness to share his story without presenting it as a universal blueprint is precisely what makes it so resonant. It reminded me that healing is rarely linear, that science and lived experience can coexist, and that it is possible to find gentleness even in places marked by shame and struggle.

If you are a gay man wrestling with body image, or someone who cares about the intersection of identity, food, and self-worth, this book is a treasure trove... not only for insight but also for solidarity. It is a wonderfully affirming read, one that left me feeling less alone, and more hopeful.

4.5⭐️
A must-read for any gay man who's struggled with how they look and feel in their skin ❤️

Thorough, honest, and balanced. There are plenty of books that deal with body dismorphia, but this book captures the intersectionality of chasing a certain body type, never accepting how one's own body behaves, and learning to be at peace with one's own health. This was a fantastic analysis and workbook to get in touch with your body and love it whole-heartedly.

A really well thought-out and sensitively handled book, O'Shaughnessy brings a personal and academic look at the difficulties of body image issues and their prevalence among gay men. This was a book I wish I had had when I was a teenager and is still helpful now, twenty years later!

I received a digital copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.