In & Out

My name may be James, but I am also a john.

I am a young, uncommitted, and flawed man, and this is my memoir. It is a personal and intimate recollection of a week abroad, in London and Amsterdam, where I paid seven high-class escorts for sex. While I suspect some of you may be drawn in by this confession, I imagine others will instinctively toss this book away in disgust. “What can I possibly learn from this lowlife?” you might wonder. Read on, and I promise that I will surprise you as much as these women surprised me.

More than anything, these pages contain a human story—one filled with as much hedonism as humor, as much philosophy as philandering, as much conversation as copulation. Here you will find a tale of a poor boy and a wealthy man. Lessons old and knowledge new. Memories of failure and hopes of success. This is a story meant to test the hard lines that separate us, but also one that seeks to tug at the soft strings that bind us together. Please join me on an emotional and vulnerable journey, a meditation on lust, love, and trauma.

This is me, in and out.

This book is NOT a traditional romance book.

This book is a memoir that contains elements of romance, with a focus on sex, love, and connection as central themes. However, despite there being no standard happy ending, no relationship between boy and girl that lasts from the first page to the final page, this memoir may be one of the most romantic, vulnerable, and emotional pieces of writing you will ever read.

Also be warned that there are multiple explicit sex scenes in this book. The aim is for the sex to tell a story. And, just like the act itself, it may take some patience before the full picture comes into view. If you happen to be uneasy about erotic literature, then I’d encourage you to look elsewhere. However, if you’d like to dive in with an open mind and an open heart, I welcome you to submit a request and join me on my journey. I hope it will be just as fulfilling for you as it was for me.