Cover Image: #MeToo


Pub Date:   |   Archive Date:

Member Reviews

This book made me uncomfortable at times and I found some of the essays difficult to process emotionally due to the subject matter but I do think that talking about sexual harassment and abuse is important, especially in a society where people who experience such actions often stay quiet about it.  It was interesting to see different points of view from both male and female authors and to read about their personal experiences. I would like to see more of what happens after #metoo.
Was this review helpful?
I believe that gathering powerful people together can be very beneficial. The #MeToo movement has changed my point of view in many situations. It is vital for us to share a message like this, and this book is suitable for the ones that feel the need to listen to others for once. Many of us misunderstood the meaning behind creating this hashtag, and it is still unclear for many of us why so many people are able to tell their stories only now. I truly recommend this book, and I hope that together we can fight for a better place to live in.
Was this review helpful?
This is such an eye opener. Despite already knowing the struggles and issues of being a female and having to deal with a lot day-day, it was comforting reading first-hand accounts and reading how courageous and strong the writers were knowing they came out of the other side, and decided to share their experiences to help others. It was also refreshing to read essays from men who have dealt with similar issues and shedding light and speaking out on something that is more taboo in today's society. I feel this is an extremely relevant book for everyone to read and digest, especially with the current news.
Was this review helpful?
This was such an eye opening read.  With what is going on in the world and it is so wonderful to read all of these essays.  What a wonderful way to bring everyone’s story out and let people know that we believe them. I would say that everyone should read this, man or woman, young or old.
Was this review helpful?
Individually, the stories were okay. Some were better than others, but on average they were three-star reads. As a whole, the collection was underwhelming.
Was this review helpful?
The hashtag #metoo was started by social activist Tarana Burke in 2006 to raise awareness of sexual abuse among women of color. Actress Alyssa Milano borrowed the hashtag in October of 2017 to encourage all women who have experienced sexual abuse, assault, or harassment to post about it on social media in order to show the magnitude of the problem. According to a CNN story, the hashtag was used on Facebook more than 12 million times in the first 24 hours.

Lori Perkins states the purpose of these essays is to show “the beginning of this particular phase of the movement” and I very much like the premise but ultimately I think this collection falls short. I was hoping for a collective, cohesive, voice but I found the essays to be disjointed. I was disappointed that male authors were included in these essays when barely a dent has been made in documenting women’s stories. Just as with the #BlackLivesMatter movement, when someone responded with #AllLivesMatter, they missed the point. This is about a historical, institutional, systemic, global crisis of sexual harassment, assault and degradation of women. 

I was especially taken aback by Jude M Lucien’s words in her essay "Men, Women and #MeToo": "Likewise, women sexually assault people. They don’t do it nearly as often as men do, and I attribute that to patriarchy (in other words, if women ruled the world, I think they might perpetrate many more sexual assaults, but they are subordinate in this world, so they don’t do it nearly as much)..." I understand this is a personal essay but I think that is a false and disappointing statement. 

Overall these essays are worth the read in the spirit of documenting the start of this movement but many more voices need to be added and heard.

“It’s how, as a society we view the female. How society takes our words, clothes, past sexual histories and scrutinizes them. This isn’t about how many people a woman has slept with. Or how short her skirt was on the day her boss decided to touch her without consent” - Gen Ryan Until When? #MeToo

“A world this riddled with sexual harassment and abuse will never be healed by a hashtag, that’s for sure. Yet this moment could be the first one in which you choose to do something different, to lay the first brick in a world that is built differently, a world safe for women’s bodies and men’s feelings, a world worthy of everyone’s wholeness.” - Courtney E Martin For Guys Reading #MeToo Testimonies

“The problem is not how many stories there are, but the fact that no one is paying attention. No one is giving them proper credence…” - Liz Debetta Our Bodies are Not the Problem
Was this review helpful?
It is hard to ignore the #MeToo campaign that is circulating with more fervency in light of the recent Harvey Weinstein sexual allegation and if I am honest when I saw that there was a #MeToo book I was sceptical. I initially thought that a writer had jumped on the bandwagon to make a pretty penny but when I looked into it and saw that it was a non-profit release I realised that I was wrong and that this is a book to take seriously.

Editor, Lori Perkins has compiled a series of writing from men and women about the #MeToo cause. Some of the essays are personal accounts and others reactionary. At times it can be quite hard to read as some writers don’t hold back when it comes to their own experiences of sexual assault. What is clear is that #MeToo is an important book and the campaign is not one to be forgotten in a hurry. 

#MeToo – Essays About How and Why this Happened, What it Means and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again by Lori Perkins is available now

For more information regarding Lori Perkins and Riverdale Avenue Books (@LoriPerkinsRAB) please visit
Was this review helpful?
This was a fantastic read and important. This book made me cry but as it said there is strength in numbers so I posted my review and story @
Was this review helpful?
So with the topic of sexual harassment dominating the news, and the #MeToo campaign dominating my social media feeds, and Gretchen Carlson's Be Fierce being the last book that I read, the stars were aligning for me to read this so I could tell others about it. It's a free ebook, a collection of essays that was written in a very short period of time (a couple of weeks, maybe?) to seize the #MeToo moment. Which is admirable, but the quality is very uneven. I'm rounding up to four stars because I still think people should read this book, but don't feel like you have to read each and every essay if you can tell it's not speaking to you. There's dispassionate analysis and deeply personal accounts of assault. There's poetry. There's some misspelling -- more than would be tolerable in other circumstances. But if you feel like there's some pieces of this phenomenon that you're missing, or you just want to hear some voices beyond those on your Facebook feed, reading this is time well spent. And unless you need a hard copy (which is available for a nominal shipping cost) you won't have to spend any money on it. Stay engaged, my friends.

I received a free copy from NetGalley and the publisher in exchange for an honest review. (But you too can receive a free copy at the publisher's website,, as mentioned above.)
Was this review helpful?

Before I begin, please be warned that there are potential sexual assault triggers in this book and possibly this review. If you have a #MeToo story, whether you’ve shared it or not, whether it happened yesterday or decades ago, you are stronger than you think you are and healing is possible.

#MeToo - Essays About How and Why This Happened, What it Means and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again delivers what it promises. While I personally connected with some essays more than others, overall this book does a really good job of shedding a light on this ... I don’t want to call it a movement because that implies an ending. Perhaps cultural shift is a more hopeful term?

Some of the essays were political and others were heart wrenching accounts of experiences people have survived. Written by males and females, some who’ve experienced sexual assault and some who haven’t, I appreciated the different viewpoints and the opportunity to consider opinions that differed from my own. 

I think my personal favourite was the first essay, where I learned of Patricia Douglas, who in 1937 was the first woman to “publicly call out the studios”. We’ve been inundated with news items of men and women silenced for so long bravely coming forward and telling their #MeToo stories. Knowing how difficult this is for survivors today I can only imagine the courage it must have taken for Patricia Douglas to speak of this in 1937. That is one extraordinary woman!

I could go into detail about the contents of each essay, what I liked, what irritated me, what encouraged me to want to do more in this area, but what I’d really like is for you to read it yourself. Riverdale Avenue Books has committed to making this ebook available to download FOR FREE across platforms and are selling the paperback at cost, so they’re not making money from this project.

While you’re reading, please be safe if there are likely to be triggers for you and reach out for support if you need to, but also:

* Think about the issues (painful as they are). 

* Consider what you personally have the power to do to make sure we’re not talking about this time in history as a movement that could have been the catalyst for lasting change, if only ... 

One of the things I love about #MeToo is that people who have been living in silence are finding their voices. Survivors are finding the support they deserve and I hope they’re accessing services that can help them navigate healing. 

I could tell you my #MeToo story but I think I’ll give you a lesson in your response when someone tells you their #MeToo story. Believe me when I say that your response, especially if you’re the first person they’ve told, can make all the difference.

Now, some of these are outrageous in their insensitivity whereas others are more subtly damaging but I’ve heard every one. Please don’t say any of these to a survivor.

* “What did you do to make him think he could?” - a friend

* “What were you wearing?” - a friend

* “He was only being affectionate.” - his wife

* “How many seconds/minutes did it happen for?” - teacher in charge of student welfare, said in the context of if it didn’t last long enough it didn’t count

* “He told me what happened and he said that he didn’t mean to. It was an accident.” - his wife

* “Did you enjoy having sex with him? Is that why you didn’t tell earlier?” - a friend’s mother who worked as a nurse who primarily cared for abused children

* “Are you sure he did that?” - a friend

* “It couldn’t have possibly happened the way you described.” - the detective investigating my case

* “He told us what you said about him. You embarrassed us and we didn’t know what to say. He was really quite mad about it.” - friends

* “Are you sure it was him? Maybe it was someone else and you’re only saying it was him because you don’t want to tell me who it really was.” - teacher in charge of student welfare

* “You’re saying it happened the second time you saw him? That <b>never</b> happens! Why didn’t he do it the first time you met?” - the detective investigating my case

* “You can’t tell your friends about this. They’re not old enough to be able to handle it.” - teacher in charge of student welfare

* “The Royal Commission is unable to investigate individual matters.” - Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse

* “He’s going through a difficult divorce, he’s an alcoholic and he has two children, one a girl a few years older than you. This would make his life even more difficult.” - teacher in charge of student welfare, who thought if I felt sorry for her friend I’d shut up

* “I can’t see you anymore. I can’t talk to you about any assault other than the one you were referred to us for.” - sexual assault counsellor

* “You’re the only one who’s made a complaint about him so far. Unless someone else makes a complaint there’s nothing we can do.” - the detective investigating my case

It’s pretty complicated coming up with dodgy reasons to shut someone up, isn’t it? Want to know what you can say that will help someone who has trusted you with their #MeToo story?

* I believe you

* It was not your fault

* You are not alone

Simple, huh?!

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley (thank you so much to NetGalley and Riverdale Avenue Books for the opportunity) in exchange for honest feedback.
Was this review helpful?
I liked this book's purpose very much, it's admirable, it's raw and makes you feel things and understand the gravity of the issue. I was hoping for an all-women book, though, because while men have to be our allies in this problem, it would be nice to hear women speak of their issues, only women for a chance. I wanted to hear how #MeToo affected women, how it changed the way they saw life, whether the hashtag helped them or not. Men already have so many ocassions to speak, on any subject, this is about women or even men that had been victims of sexual abuse/harassment. But the men that contributed to this book, mostly spoke of how they had been ignorant of the magnitude of this issue or how they had been bullied at work and some of them did say supportive things, but you get my point. 

There were some essays in this book that hurt me deeply, you have these strong women that had to go through so much at the hands of men. And it's awful to read of it. There were some stories that didn't surprise me because they happened to me too, to women I know, but I still stood there and wondered how did we reach this point where rape and harassment are the norm. And having control over your body being something that you were lucky enough to have.

This book mostly made me sad, it did raise some questions, most of these I had already thought about multiple times. There was a question that stood up, though, and that was whether #MeToo will make a lasting impression.

I'm very much interested in knowing this, too. Because for a while, it's been an international matter, things changed, men lost their jobs, women came forward or felt safer speaking about what happened to them, but will it make a lasting impact?

Will it push us towards making this world we're living in a safer place for women? Only time would tell, I suppose.

Thanks Netgalley and the publishers for providing me with this copy. I admire the hard work everyone put into this book in order to inform people about why #MeToo matters.

And I want to thank everyone that was brave enough to come forward with their stories, you are forever my heroes.
Was this review helpful?
While some were more insightful than others, these essays managed to illustrate strong connections between gender inequality, toxic masculinity, and misogyny in a meaningful way.
Was this review helpful?
I'm sure that there are many #MeToo stories that could be compiled into collections that would be powerful tools, but this was not that. There were a few stories that packed a punch, but it was very uneven overall. Things like an excerpt from a memoir felt out of place, despite their subject matter. I wish that this had been pushed back even another month to develop it into something more powerful..
Was this review helpful?
The collection of essays edited by Lori Perkins - available for free download on - reveals personal experience of both and women that at certain moments of their careers or human development faced different degrees of sexual harassment and abuse. The testimonies are liberating but also aimed at giving strenth and support to those not yet able to talk about their trauma. It helps - although at a limited extent - to deal with the everyday weight of the soul drama, but also to realize that sharing is a way to empower others in similar situations, the silent voices of the victims. Such a collection has also the role of educating both potential victims and aggressors, offering examples of how much suffering sexual abuse can bring and how avoid ending up as a victim. Each and every one of us has a voice that we need to use it to fight and counter inequalities, injustice and abuse. And perpetrators, regardless how close to kin they are and what personal trauma they went through either, they need to be revealed. 
A very useful collection to read for everyone interested in understanding the subtle ways of sexual abuse and how important is to reject such public behaviors, regardless of the professional background and social status of the perpetrators. Abuse is just not acceptable.
Was this review helpful?
<b>Average Rating: 3.29 stars. </b>

This is a difficult review to write. I by no means want to take away from the importance of the #MeToo hashtag, but this book definitely had its flaws. I wish I could give it five stars simply for the importance of subject matter, but I can’t. I’m going to divide my review into sections based on the essays themselves.


<u>Remembering Patricia Douglas, the First Woman to Call Out Hollywood for Sexual Assault:</u> 5 stars. Haunting, sad, and made me tear up. I had never heard of Patricia Douglas before this, but she deserved a lot better than she got.

<u>After #MeToo</u> 2 stars. The beginning was good, but it was somehow too long and too rushed all at once. It was split into a bunch of little sections, which, instead of making the essay easier to read, felt like an information overload. There were too many sections. Every time I flipped the page I was like “Seriously?? There’s more??”

<u>The Bully Culture of the Weinsteins</u>: 3.5 stars. Good, but didn’t give a lot of details and didn’t really set up any tension or feelings of being overwhelmed, so it wasn’t as effective as other pieces I’d read.

<u>The Big Ugly</u>: This left literally no impression on me whatsoever. I can’t even remember what it was about. I’m not even going to rate it.

<u>Wall Street Assets</u>: 2 stars. The writing was good but the uncomfortably graphic scene in the middle of it was unneeded and just plain weird.

<u>#MeToo: A Rock’n’Roll Runway</u>: 3 stars. The stories were haunting, but it is a very potentially triggering piece. There was also some unneeded and racist stereotyping of black girls, which was unappreciated and wrong. 

<u>Consent: Breaking the Silence</u>: 5 stars. Sad and hopeful all at once, with a good message r.e. statutory r*pe.

<u>Tit for Tat</u>: 2 stars. Another one that was kind of weird. It used the terms “male” and “female” wayy too often. Like, that is literally the type of language that TERFs use and emphasize on??? I really hope that it was accidental. However, there were some good guidelines in it that described the warning signs of a sexual predator.

<u>“I was only…”</u>: 5 Stars. An excellent and wonderfully written piece on the importance of not minimizing the effect of sexual harassment by not saying “I was only trying to help,” “It was only a joke,” etc. 

<u>Me Too: Protecting Men from Themselves</u>: 5 stars. The second good piece in a row! Hooray. An excellent look at how sexual assault victims are expected to protect the loving men in their lives from their trauma. Probably my <b>favorite piece</b> out of the whole book.

<u>Men, Women, and #MeToo</u>: 5 stars. An awesome look at aspects of r*pe culture that aren’t looked at a lot in the mainstream feminist stratosphere. Another favorite.

<u>Every Book I Have Ever Written is a #MeToo Novel</u>: 3.5 stars. Good subject matter, but I wish it had been longer with more depth than breadth. 

<u>#NotMe’s Instead of #MeToo’s</u>: 2 stars. There wasn’t really anything wrong with it, I was just kind of bored and it didn’t really keep my attention.

<u>Not Them Too</u>: 2 stars. Got a real “white feminism” vibe, and it was too short for me to really get anything else from it. 

<u>Why We #MeToo</u>: 1 star. I read this literally five minutes ago and can’t even remember what it was about. 

<u>Until When? #MeToo</u>: 2 stars. This was the third super short essay in a row, and I was getting kind of tired of brief essays. Wish there had been a long one somewhere in there to break the monotony.

<u>Doing What We’ve Always Done: Gender Roles and Sexual Assault</u>: 4.5 stars. Great topic about gender roles and how sometimes men just don’t get it. It reminded me of the intro to the10th Anniversary edition of Speak.

<u>More Than a Hashtag</u>: 4 stars. Brought some humor to an unfunny topic that was a welcome break from the more serious pieces. However, the humor didn’t detract from the overlaying message. 

<u>For Guys Reading #MeToo Testimonies</u>: 4 stars. A good step by step guideline for men wondering what they can do to help.

<u>The Wild Feminine Freed #MeToo</u>: 1 star. Uhhhhhhh. This was just kind of weird. Like wtf was going on. Seeing Baba Yaga, the centuries old witch from fairy tales who literally runs around on a house on chicken legs, as a symbol of femininity, was…. strange.

<u>Our Bodies Are Not the Problem</u>: 2.5 stars. Another…. Just, bleh. I don’t know. It had no effect on me. 

<u>Hush</u>: 4 stars. Short, but the good kind of short. It was nice to have a poem as a break from the essays. This one packed a powerful punch. 

<u>Sexual Harassment on the Job from HR’s Perspective</u>: 4 stars. Another superb piece. I loved that it went really into depth on sexual harassment in the workplace. I learned things I didn’t know before. 

<u>Why the #MeToo Movement is a Call to Arms for Men Everywhere</u>: 4 stars. A great piece on why it’s important to actively support the women in your life. 

<u>Politics is My #MeToo</u>: 3 stars. uhhh some more white feminism vibes. But besides that, it definitely wasn’t the strongest piece and not a very good essay to end with. 

<b>Overall thoughts</b>

All in all, it was definitely a nice book, and probably worth reading (especially since – according to the ARC copy, it will be free on all e-book platforms!!) if you are interested in the #MeToo movement.

I wish there had been more pieces written by women of color, and I was definitely looking for a piece written by a trans woman! Violence towards trans women is a super prevalent issue in sexual harassment, but the issue was only briefly mentioned once throughout the entire collection. And that made me sad. 

(Also – it should be noted that this novel could be <b>extremely triggering</b> in terms of sexual harassment/assault, r*pe, and violence. Tread with caution.)

<i>I was provided an eARC copy by NetGalley in exchange for a complete and honest review.</i>
Was this review helpful?
"For me, this book is my way of putting my time and money where my mouth is. I gave up many nights of sleep putting it together, and my staff worked 'round the clock to get it to you in as short time as possible. The authors donated their pieces for free. Riverdale Avenue Books is offering the eBook for free on all platforms in the hope that it reaches as many people as possible. We want to make sure to reach people in the most permanent ways possible. Print is a little more expensive to produce, so we are offering the book at a cost (which means we sell it for the cost of printing and distribution, and we take no profit). So pass this book around. Share it with your sons, brothers, fathers, your daughters, sisters and mothers, your coworkers and friends. Read passages to them, if they won't read it for themselves. Leave it on the desk of someone who should know better. Help us make this movement more than a hashtag. If you do, we'll do a second and third and forth edition - until things change." - Lori Perkins, November 2017

So, unless you've been hiding under a rock, well away from social media you will be aware that in October of this year, the hashtag #MeToo was trending on various different platforms where people, especially women would come forward and tell their stories of sexual harassment and assault with the hope and ambitions to make a change. "The #MeToo social media hashtag, first coined more than ten years ago by Tarana Burke, exploded in October 2017, after a boost from Alyssa Milano, in the wake of Harvey Weinstein's fall. Its popularity demonstrates that lots of women - and some men - have experienced sexual harassment or assault, and are prepared to go public about it." The sudden movement was resurfaced just last month when Alyssa Milano (one of Weinstein's most vocal critics) wrote "If all the women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote ‘Me Too’ as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem."

In her book, Lori Perkins explains how "there are fine reasons to say #MeToo. Many people I respect have done so. Saying #MeToo supports others who need the courage to come forward. The great chorus of voices can help banish undeserved shame, fear, and isolation that many have lived with for too long. The sense of belonging to a tribe can benefit us here."

#MeToo is such an important movement of such serious topics that need to be addressed. "Within 24 hours of the #MeToo movement, more than 12 million Facebook posts, comments and reactions were made." I personally scrolled through a dozen posts from my own Facebook friends and it really makes you realise how big the scale of the issue is, you're constantly scrolling down your feed thinking 'not her too'. 

Lori Perkins decided that she needed to write a book that includes a bunch of collected and powerful essays of individuals, both men and women, talking through their experiences. Throughout the book, there were a few quotes that stuck in my head. The first being that "women remain silent because we know the statistics, we know that most cases won't make it to court, and those that do won't win." Over the years, I have met many different individuals who unfortunately have experiences of sexual abuse and this quote is very close to home. I have edged people close to me to involve the police and tried to build their courage up to disclose what happened to them only for months later, their cases to be dropped and no charges pressed leaving them with even more fear than they carried before. 

It is important to note that this book is written in America and therefore, all the stories came from American citizens with American statistics. We must remember that this is a worldwide issue and we must start talking. I did manage to find some important statistics of the UK whilst doing some research that I will leave below;

Approximately 85,000 women and 12,000 men are raped in England and Wales alone every year; that's roughly 11 rapes (of adults alone) every hour. These figures include assaults by penetration and attempts.
Almost half a million adults are sexually assaulted in England and Wales every year. 
1 in 5 women aged 16 - 59 has experienced some form of sexual violence since the age of 16.
Only around 15% of those who experience sexual violence choose to report to the police.
Approximately 90% of those who are raped know the perpetrator prior to the offence.
31% of young women aged 18-24 report having experienced sexual abuse in childhood.
In 2012-13, 22,654 sexual offences against under 18s were reported to police in England and Wales with four out of five cases involving girls.
Conviction rates for rape are far lower than other crimes, with only 5.7% of reported rape cases ending in a conviction for the perpetrator.
1 in 3 teenage girls in England has been pressured into doing something sexual by a partner.
A third of female students in the UK have experienced inappropriate touching or groping at university.
This is such an important topic and too many people are getting away with abusing innocent individuals. "Our bodies are not the problem" reads another statement within the book and is possibly one of the truest things I have ever read. Mark Radcliff wrote an essay within this book and gave such an important message aimed towards other men. "So the lesson for us men is simple: This is a problem that men have caused. So we can't expect women to fix it all on their own, even as brave and helpful as these posts are. And it's not enough for us men to just not assault women. We have to do more. Not just not be part of the problem, but actively be part of the solution." I thought that this was such a powerful message and everything that he has said is true. This hashtag and people telling their stories is not enough to make a change, we all have to work together spreading awareness and opening up, encouraging others to be brave enough to seek support and file reports on their assaults and working for a world where sexual abuse and harassment doesn't exist or is dramatically reduced. You can't wait for it to happen to your mother, daughter, niece, wife or friend for you to want to make a difference. We need to prevent it from happening in the first place. In a different essay, Catherine Gigante-Brown explains how she believes that "I was only.." are the three most dangerous words in the English language, "I was only joking", "I was only trying to help", "I was only.." "No. You weren't. You only offer those weak excuses when you are caught. Yes means yes. No means no. It feels good to stand up to myself. For my rights. For my body. At 19, At 29. At 58. And I am still doing it with words as well as deeds. When will it stop? When we finally see each other as human beings. Period. Not by our sex. Not by our skin colour. Not by our religion. Just as people. People with feelings. Rights. Boundaries. People who deserve better. Respect. Kindness. Acceptance. It starts here. It starts now. It starts with us".

Overall, this is a very powerful and educational book. I would highly recommend giving it a read. It includes a whole bunch of passages from various different writers who explain their own personal stories of sexual harassment or abuse. It has 152 pages and is honestly the most inspiring book I have ever read. I gave it five out of five stars on Goodreads and would love to hear your feedback on what you thought of the book.

I have added into this post a guide (on the left) created by Vonny Leclerc who is a journalist and columnist for The National (a newpaper that supports an independent Scotland) and wrote an article featuring the #MeToo campaign before condensing it into a guide of Flirting vs Harassment and how to give genuine compliments.

This book was published on November 3rd 2017 and the eBook of '#MeToo: Essays About How and Why This Happened, What It Means, and How to Make Sure it Never Happens Again' can be found and downloaded for free on the iBooks App and here at the UK Amazon Kindle store (compatible with the free Kindle App) which also gives you the option to buy the £4.99 Paperback copy. Thank-you for NetGalley for sending me over a copy of the book.

"Let's get educated on sexual predators, and on our own vulnerabilities, so that we can help the collective movement towards a better world."

"We are not a mob. We are a movement."
Was this review helpful?