This book was okay. I did not have many feelings as I read, so this is definitely a sign that the book was readable but not remarkable.

The writing style was difficult to read...it felt stilted overall and throw off the pacing.

Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for providing me with the ARC. This was one I was really anticipating and it didn't disappoint me! Will read more from this author in the future!

I’ve read some heartbreaking novels about domestic abuse this year. From all those stories, Sparrow was my favorite.

Savannah Rose –Sparrow to her friends and family– is a seventeen-year-old talented ballerina. Sparrow starts dating Tristan, the popular guy at school. But soon she realizes he's not perfect as she thought. After suffering a brutal assault by him, Sparrow has two options. She can either admit what happened to her family and best friend Lucas or keep silence. Choosing the latter, because that’s what her mother taught her, Sparrow’s life gets darker. When this happens, she knows it's time to stop being a victim and confront her past, or she will fall in a hole with no way out.

After reading the first part of the story, I was convinced that the book wasn’t about a toxic relationship. It's about how our childhood experiences determine who we become when we grow up and how they affect our future. It's about a strong character who suffers the consequences of having a troubled mother. Physical abuse is a sensitive topic to write about, but the author finds a heartbreaking-unique way to tell Sparrow's story.

The narrative perspective is told by Sparrow and Lucas. The first one helps us to understand how a person who suffers abuse feels like and all the process she struggles to recover, and the second one to realize that a tragedy not only affects the victim but also people around her. I would have liked the entire book to be only from Sparrow's point of view. She's an intense and interesting character and had a lot to offer to the story, especially her recovery journey. Besides Sparrow, Lucas, as a person, had a lot to deal with. All those experiences could have made him grow through the pages, and it wasn't like that. It didn't make me cry or feel sad. I felt like his part lacked empathy.

What I liked the most about Sparrow is the last part of the book. The dialogues are wisely written. Her visits with the therapist after the coma her boyfriend puts her in, made me understand the physical and psychological damage that a person faces after an assault like the protagonist suffers; how hard it is to feel loved again and believe in others, but especially in herself.

In all, Sparrow is a fantastic book if you feel ok reading about abuse. It has explicit content, but it is necessary for people who are getting a difficult time in their lives.

P.S. I loved the cover of the book and what it represents for the story.

4.5 Stars

Sparrow by Mary Cecilia Jackson is an emotional and heartbreaking read that highlights the strength of the human psyche and soul to let go and move forward just as beautifully and gracefully despite tragedy.

In this bittersweet novel, we take a journey with Sparrow, a young and talented ballerina. We experience heart-pounding highs and earth-crashing lows as she falls in love and, after a brutal betrayal, must figure out who she is and what she is made of. This violent and tragic incident also sets off a wave of emotional, physical and mental destruction that leaves no one close to Sparrow unscathed.

Can Sparrow learn to live again or will she be forever broken and silenced?

This is a compelling read that kept me turning the pages. Full of heartbreak and devastation, I shed tears and got angry. Make sure you have tissues handy. What Sparrow endures may be triggering but, rest assured, she will find her way.
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I must say that I absolutely loved Lucas. His strength, protectiveness and friendship are unparalleled. He is so down to earth and yet so untamable. He is himself. Honest and true.

This book, for me, seems true to nature. The way Sparrow’s friends try to help while she pushes them away seems eerily authentic.

I was left with a couple questions as well. Why did Tristan choose to date Sparrow after so many years? It seemed a little out of the blue, for me. Also, why does she count by threes? Where did that come from?

At certain points, like when Tristan has an abrupt change in his demeanor, I felt that I was missing parts of the story. He becomes someone different and we don’t get to see the breakdown right away. Sparrow and Tristan’s relationship seems to be unraveling and yet, we don’t know how they got there either. It seems to go from zero to sixty so quickly. Later on, in the novel, when told from Lucas’s point of view, the story does go back in time to explain the missing pieces. I don’t know if that is the best way for the story to unfold but I got all the information I needed regardless and persevered.

For me, this book ends with a HFN. It’s a bittersweet ending that has me aching for another chapter in Lucas and Sparrow’s lives. I need more and hope this author follows this up with a sequel.

I received an ARC via NetGalley of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Sparrow by Mary Vecilia Jackson brings the reader into the life of Savannah. Savannah, Sparrow, spends her time outside of school at ballet practice with her dance partner and best friend, Lucas. Both dancers are practicing for a big performance. Tristan is one of the most popular boys in school and notices Savannah when he unintentionally bumps her with his car, as she is running late to practice. Sparrow is surprised and accepts Tristan’s invitation to go on a date.
Sparrow is struggling with the death of her mother. Her mother appears in her dreams, but Sparrow is confused as to why. She knows her mother was angry with her often and Sparrow had to hide to avoid the anger.
Tristan and Sparrow seem to hit it off nicely, but some observations from friends lead them to believe that Tristan is not the right boyfriend for Sparrow. Will Sparrow come to the same realization?

The author alternates point of view and connects the reader to the personalities of both Lucas and Sparrow. The author flawlessly builds empathy and anger throughout the novel. I cried, longed to help, and felt Lucas’s anger. Exceptional and necessary topic regarding dating violence and abuse. All teens male or female need to know if it does not feel right and you are being treated as less than the blessing you are, perhaps you may not have met the match made for you. #Hottingerhighlights #yareads #middleschoolelateacher #secondaryelateacher #importantteenlit

Nearly three stars

This novel is filled with important themes for both teen and adult readers alike: child abuse, domestic violence, personal power-based violence, bystander intervention, and trauma. There are some difficult and memorable scenes relating to all of these areas.

While I appreciate the themes, I had real struggles with some of the stylistic choices here. There is too much happening. The constant references to Swan Lake - like the mother/Sparrow juxtaposition, the changing hair color, the destruction of the painting, etc. - are heavy handed. Also, I wish the author had omitted the Shakespeare references; these felt distracting and for me did not add any context, enlightenment, or emphasis. Some of the dialogue is incredibly bizarre. Several of the teenage characters use similes and idioms that are age-appropriate for grandparents maybe (????) but certainly not for them. I also found these choices strange and distracting. The most challenging aspect of the narrative is the choppy and disjointed focus on Sparrow and Lucas. I had a hard time getting into the novel until the focus moved over to Lucas. For me, the shifts between characters were often abrupt and oddly placed.

I really like the concept, but I felt like this needed several more rounds of brutal editing before even being released in the current ARC format. I'll be excited to read more from this author in the future and hope that the ideas will be more polished upon publication.

There was a lot I liked about this book, but probably an equal amount I didn't like.

It's about a girl called Sparrow, a talented dancer in a small town who is haunted by her past to a degree that threatens her future. She gets into a relationship with a handsome player who treats her like crap and starts trying to alienate her from her friends.

In a second POV we get Lucas's story. Lucas is Sparrow's dance partner and all-around nice guy. He's also in love with her, so his jealousy and suspicion of the above-mentioned handsome player starts off feeling like sour grapes.

I didn't feel like this was a book that really needed a second POV character, especially since each time Lucas stepped into the story, we were taken back in time so we could see the events of the previous section through his eyes. This really slowed the book down and seeing the same events again didn't really add much to the story. And Lucas is far too much the good-guy to be truly interesting. Even when he gave in to his temper and let his rage out, he still came across as a nice guy.

The other thing I really didn't like about the book was how quickly Sparrow's relationship with Tristan developed. It didn't really develop, She met him, they went out, and suddenly they were in a relationship and in love. I never understood the connection or what made her think he loved her or why she loved him. Nothing in any of his actions made me believe that. The thing with abusive relationships is that before they become manipulative and dangerous, there has to be something real and powerful there. Otherwise no one would stay in one. Staying is hoping things will go back to being the perfect thing that existed to begin with.

While ballet is obviously important to Sparrow and Lucas, it isn't really a huge part of the book, so if you're looking for a story that delves deep into the ballet world, this isn't the book for you. This is much more a delve into the psyche of a young woman whose traumatic past has her confused about what love actually looks and feels like.

And as that, it does work on many levels. There are just a few too many distractions around this core plot, and not enough realistic set up in the early part of the book to sustain the later parts.

I think there's a rule somewhere that says that if an author writes a book about ballet, you are legally required to read it. How else to explain my apparent compulsion in picking up books about ballet, even though I've never really had an interest in it before in my life? Something about the discipline required, the athleticism, and the intense emotions just appeals to me on a very base level.

SPARROW is a book about a high school ballerina named Sparrow. She has close friends and is passionate about ballet. When she ends up going out with the hot jock on campus, Tristan, it seems like her whole life is perfectly rounded out. But Tristan is not a nice boy; and when he attacks her one day, she must spend the rest of the book not just having to recover, emotionally and physically, but also face the dark, half-buried memories from childhood that his abuse has inadvertently uncovered.

I didn't realize this when I picked up the book, but SPARROW is a dual-POV story. Half is told from Sparrow's POV and the other half is told from the POV of the Nice Guy who she's friendzoned, Lucas. I kind of wish the whole book had been narrated from Sparrow's POV, because it kind of ends up feeling like one of those cautionary tales Nice Guys feed girls to gaslight women into dating them, e.g. "He's no good for you, I'm the only one who can treat you right, hope he beats you to teach you a lesson, etc." Lucas isn't like that at all, but I'm not sure having that dichotomy in the narrative was a good move.

I liked Sparrow's POV, but wasn't as big a fan of Lucas. This is a story of healing and confronting abuse, and while the author did that part of the book really well, I didn't really feel like Lucas's POV had any place in Sparrow's journey of healing. The writing is beautiful and it does portray an abusive relationship pretty realistically-- to the point where it's hard to read at times-- but something about it felt a little too dramatic and contrived, and it kind of ended up feeling like a Lifetime movie.

SPARROW is not a bad book but I would not put it on the same level with Laurie Halse Anderson's SPEAK, as the blurb writers did. That only raises somewhat unrealistic expectations.

Thanks to Netgalley/the publisher for the review copy!

2.5 out of 5 stars

I did myself a great disservice by not reading the synopsis beforehand. My assumption (based on the cover and the First Look first chapter and the general Black Swan vibes it invokes) was that this was a gritty, dance-intensive story with technique and competition and peer pressure to succeed being the main focus of the narrative.

Oh, how wrong I was.

When I was first introduced to Tristan, the main "love" interest, I was so perplexed by the rushed feelings and obvious red flags and alarm bells ringing in my head, I thought that this might be the worst attempt at teen romance ever written. And then the abuse started and I realized the dark and very intentionally twisted turn the story was rapidly taking and it was profoundly shocking. I'd be lying to you if I said I wasn't deeply emotionally affected by some of the imagery of Sparrow in the hospital. The juxtaposition of Sparrow as a beautiful, graceful ballerina and a broken, battered shell of her former self was intense and visceral. The chapters where she clings between life and death are particularly haunting. There were several scenes like this that I broke out a Kleenex or two, for sure.

While emotionally, the story was very effective, I had some issues with the pacing and the POV choices. I don't believe the story needed a second point of view from Lucas, the hero best friend/potential love interest. I found myself barely paying attention during these chapters, and practically skimmed the chapters where he moves to his granny's house. I just don't believe that he contributed enough to the narrative and it made me antsy because all I wanted to do was see how Sparrow was doing instead. I would have much preferred to remain with Sparrow as she recovered and delved into the issues surrounding her flawed relationship with her mother. By the time this whole other aspect of the story was identified, it had to be promptly resolved and I ultimately, I felt short-changed.

I wanted to love this book more than I did. It started out rough and for most of the book I felt like some of the story was missing. It follows Sparrow, a ballerina who has suffered horrific abuse b.y her later mother. She becomes entangled with a boyfriend who abuses her just as her mother did. Sparrow feels like she deserves the way she is treated, both by her late mother, and by Tristan.

It was a tough book to read and does contain triggers. Kudos to the author for the beautiful way it was written, especially as a debut book.

This was a really poignant book but we just got off on the wrong foot & I just couldn’t get that mental block out of my mind.

At first it’s pretty cringy, typical YA stuff but then it completely changes! I liked having Lucas’ perspective but it did confuse me the first time when the story suddenly rewinded & I wasn’t sure what was going on with that but it actually worked really well for the rest of the book.

I also really liked the time frame on this because we see the before, during & after of abuse, which I feel like I haven’t seen before.
It also felt with different types of abuse & how they can link together.

Overall, this is a really different, unique book that I really enjoyed! It started off badly for me - but I’m warning you now - so hopefully you can go into this with an open mind & not get stuck on the beginning!

This was another heartbreaking novel that I just couldn't put down!! I loved the same Sparrow and she is such a talented dancer and her becoming the victim of assault was so sad and felt very real. You never know when something is going to make someone snap. This book is split up between the time before and after the assault which I think worked out well for this story. It gave you a better overall feel and look at the story and I think if you would have just gotten one of those it wouldn't have had the same impact. The writing in this one was spot on and I was so engaged that it was dark out side and I didn't even realize it.


Go Into This One Knowing: Dark Subject Matter (assault)

Sparrow begins strong and builds tension around Sparrows relationships with her boyfriend and her dance partner, as well as flashbacks to events with her late mother. The story begins to fall apart after Sparrow is assaulted. Typical YA tropes are trotted out - uncannily wise therapist, long suffering granny, precocious teen friends - until a happy ending is reached.

Not sure how I felt about this book or what to really think of it, to be honest. I felt it was a little slow, but I would read more books by Cecilia Jackson because her writing is really well put together!

On the surface Savannah Darcy Rose has everything. A loving family, amazing friends, the coveted spot in an upcoming ballet, and the cutest nickname ever - Sparrow. You would think that Sparrow wouldn't be surprised when Tristan, devastatingly good-looking, popular, rich, baseball scholarship recipient, college bound boy wants to take her on a date. But Sparrow is surprised when Tristan shows interest and even more surprised when she falls quick and hard.

Sparrow’s life has been anything but easy. But she is strong and brave and has an amazing support system of family and friends.

Kudos to Mary Cecilia Jackson for bringing Sparrow, Tristan, Lucas, Delaney, and all the other characters to life. The reality of the story and of the words on the page will stick with me long after I finished the book.

I loved this book! It’s an important story of community, strength, courage and not giving up.

Thank you to MacMillan-Tor/Forge and #netgalley for a review copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

There is a lot of sadness in this novel. If you are at all triggered by domestic violence and/or child abuse then this is probably not the story for you.

Sparrow is a ballet dancer. Ballet and the friends she has made there are her life... until she runs in front of Tristan’s car and collides with it.

Tristan is dashing, popular, gorgeous and abusive. Very quickly... Sparrow finds herself in a  relationship that is all-encompassing. Tristan is possessive and controlling. Soon his jealousy turns to anger and he’s physically abusing her.

No matter what Sparrow’s friends say - and they try everything - she won’t admit that she’s being physically hurt by the boyfriend who claims to love her. He always apologizes, he buys her gifts, and he always feels guilty. the problem is that the abuse never stops.

I found the time a little difficult to follow in this novel. The relationship between Sparrow and Tristan seems to advance from zero to one hundred in a very short space of time. it’s not that it’s not possible for a relationship to happen that way - it just seemed a little strange to me.

The other perspective in the book is that of Lucas. He is Sparrow’s dance partner and also... has feelings for her. he’s everything that Tristan isn’t. Lucas is sweet and kind, generous of spirit, and appreciates dance in the same way Sparrow does.

Lucas is not the object of Sparrow’s affection and despite his jealousy, he tries to be the friend she needs even when she refuses to tell the truth about her abusive relationship.

I enjoyed Lucas’ perspective more than Sparrow’s. I think I found her a little bit frustrating. Don’t get me wrong, I GET the issues with domestic violence and how difficult it can be to make the decision to get away ... but I’m not sure that the author captured the hopelessness and fear of being alone... and the million other thoughts that go through one’s mind.

Maybe I just found Lucas' perspective a more comfortable place to be as a reader.

The extreme violence that everyone is expecting finally happens and Sparrow is nearly killed. This is the point at which her past begins to be revealed. There’s much more to Sparrow’s past than the reader knows initially.

This book is emotional, especially Lucas’ perspective. (for me anyway) It’s violent but it’s about a topic that needs to be spoken about a lot more often.

Sparrow, a high school student who is an exceptional ballerina, has drawn the attention of the most popular guy in school. As any typical high school relationship goes, she falls hard and fast and what starts out as blissful and wonderful, quickly turns toxic. Not listening to her friends or family, and letting her boyfriend interfere with ballet, a tragic incident is what turns everything around for her. Years of suppressed abuse come to light and she becomes a shell of her self, and her and her friends have to work through the difficult times together and alone, and the story of Sparrow unfolds as one where you find yourself rooting for her throughout the entirety of the novel.

Savannah Rose, better known as Sparrow, is a brilliant dancer. Her lifts and jumps are the envy of everyone in the company. She will definitely be the Swan Queen in the next major showcase.

But Sparrow keeps her private life out of her dance. She tries very hard to keep them separate. Her friends are from ballet. Her social life revolves around ballet. And she has no one else.

Until Tristan.

He's everything a girl could dream of. He's kind. He's generous. He's gorgeous. And he says he loves her...

... after every time he abuses her.

His love has conditions. His love depends on her behaving. If he gets angry, then she must have done something wrong.

Sparrow learned this with her mother years before. If they are angry, you were bad.

No matter how hard Sparrow's friends try to show her the truth and no matter how hard they try to protect her, they are no match for her own deep insecurities.

And they are definitely no match for Tristan's fists when he gets angry.

Final thoughts: Whoa. This one hit every button in me. I literally cried more than a few times during this. It is NOT an easy read. But it IS a necessary one for many. The author really nailed all of the points of view on this one. While there were a few little things to nitpick, the overall story is deep and meaningful. There is no HEA (Happily Ever After) in this. It does end, but it's not the same, predictable ending that people have come to expect. This ending is real. I strongly recommend this, but warn that there are triggers here.

Rating: 5/5

Thanks to NetGalley and Tor Forge for the ARC.

Sparrow is a strong young ballerina who has haunting memories of the past and loses herself within an abusive relationship in the present. Tristan makes her feel loved and like she wants more; until she doesn't and then Tristan gets violent. While Sparrow is healing she is brought to a family therapist who allows her time to be silent and waits. Through many visits and over time Sparrow is allowed to begin the healing process which actually starts with why Sparrow always feels like she deserves what happens when you learn that her mother was also violent and abusive to young Sparrow.

The story is told in alternating segments between Sparrow and her best friend and dance partner, Lucas, point of views. With Sparrow losing herself and Lucas trying to make her see reason and then Sparrow being attacked and Lucas losing himself. Finally, the book focuses on how both characters find themselves again through receiving help and then moving onto new things in life.

This is a powerful story. Sparrow gets into a relationship that becomes so intense she forgets who she is. There are lots of lessons taught through out this novel but the biggest is “It’s also okay to walk away just because you want to. You don’t need to explain or justify anything. You don’t have to have a reason. You can just want out.” After a harrowing experience, Sparrows healing process is compelling. This is a must read for young adults.