I received the audio arc of The Cost of Knowing at no cost from NetGalley and Simon and Schuster. It was my choice to read and review.

I was hooked. I could not pause it. I loved the urban fantasy setting and the fact that the magic system is somewhat explained yet not all the way. Because it's not the focal point. The focal point is Alex and his brother, Isaiah, and their relationship after shared trauma in their past.

The pacing was great, it wasn't too fast or too slow and I got just enough answers at the proper times which made it flow really well. I was so proud of Alex for pushing past some of his anxieties and grief to be more present. Not saying that the anxiety and grief went away but that he found something that made it important for him to act in spite of it.

It's important to read own voices, diverse books like this so we can open our eyes to the experiences of others and think differently about our own tendencies, reactions, and thoughts. I had the pleasure of doing an author interview with Brittney Morris on my Bookstagram (@ram_reads) and she said "I try to get my readers to see the world in a new way with each book I write."

She definitely accomplished that and I would recommend The Cost of Knowing to anyone who is trying to read more own voices, diverse books and doesn't know where to start because it's a blend of contemporary with a sprinkle of fantasy/magic and it covers meaningful themes with realistic character portrayals.

I wasn't sure what to expect from this one but I knew it was going to break me and that it did! Following a traumatic car accident that leaves Alex and his brother Isaiah orphaned, Alex discovers that he can see the future of every person he touches. Once he discovers these abilities, and learns the dangers of that knowledge, he tries to keep his distance from the ones he loves - until one day he picks up an old family photo and has a vision of Isaiah meeting an untimely death.

Morris did a wonderful job blending the supernatural, "fantastical" elements of this with the everyday obstacles of being a young Black man. The societal pressures to be viewed one way, the microaggressions endured from "well-meaning" White people, the constant questioning of what makes you different than the most recent Black body found dead on the street. Morris effortlessly wove these into the stories as almost everyday occurrences rather than their own separate plotlines, showcases how prevalent these experiences are for Black people but nonetheless, we have to keep moving.

The relationship between these two brothers was also beautiful, showcasing both strength and vulnerability in Alex and Isaiah. What starts off as a cold and distant day of interaction blossoms into something really pure and heartwarming, appealing to the emotional sap I truly am.

Without giving anything away, another chapter or two of world building would've really put this over the top for me. There were a few parts that felt rushed, and maybe that was done intentionally to match the pace of Alex & Isaiah's experience, but I think just a little bit more context before immersing us into their world would have helped paint the picture

There was a lot to like about this story. It had some great issues that it took a look at. For instance with Alex and his brother living in a nice neighborhood, a white woman that lived near them would talk about people who she didn’t think belonged in their neighborhood. And when it came to people who were going to be staying there, sounds like Airbnb type of things for a concert, she got really serious about it. Not realizing that the musician playing there was someone that both Alex and his brother were fans of.

Then there was the storyline of Alex deciding to spend more time with his little brother when he saw a vision. But the thing was that Alex knew he couldn’t change what he saw. He’d tried, but it still always happened. So he wondered what the use was in having the vision. Spending time with his brother Isaiah he learns a lot. Things about not only his brother, but even about their family history. And when it seems that maybe, just maybe there is a cure, things still don’t go the way they hope they can change it.

Unfortunately this book wasn’t perfect for me though other than how great the story was. Because it was everything that he touched, and it was every single thing that was going to happen with that thing, the beginning of the story got a little bogged down for me quickly. Yeah, I get that the author was trying to show just how repetitive and annoying the fact that when he picked up his cell phone he immediately saw a vision of himself unlocking it and then dialing the number, etc. But I feel like it went on a little too long and made me zone out. I wonder if that would be the same for a teen who has trouble keeping their attention when reading anyway. So that would be the one thing that I think is a big enough issue to mention.

Other than that, I loved the musician and the concert at the end, and how people don’t listen to what lyrics might mean sometimes. They just assume, hey, he’s rapping, he’s talking about weapons, I’m sure he means literally, not at all figuratively. And the lyrics in this were really so good, when you actually read them and took them for what they were saying. This is still a book I want to get for my students to read though, so I do definitely recommend it.

THE COST OF KNOWING deals heavily with themes of grief, anxiety, manhood, and brotherhood. I appreciate the complex and messy relationship Alex had with his little brother Isaiah and how they relearn each other throughout the novel. I absolutely loved the representation of a Black boy who deals with anxiety, realizes it, and accepts it as part of his life instead of trying to ignore it. This novel raises big questions about what it means to be man and if being able to provide is more important than being present for your family? Alex deals a lot with trying to lead by example while simultaneously feeling like a failure. There’s so many layers to this novel that I’m still unpacking!

Book Review for The Cost of Knowing
Full review for this title will be posted at: @cattleboobooks on Instagram!

This book follow Alex Rufus and he has the ability to see the future every time he touches something or someone. One day he touches a photo and gets a vision of his brother's death.

I was first drawn to this book because I saw it was being compared to Dear Martin which I love! I would say it's the fantasy version of Dear Martin and it reads just like a movie. The dedication page also lets you know what this story is going to be about: “To all the Black boys who had to grow up too early.”

This book covers a lot of topics and issues including sibling relationships, romantic relationships, racism, grief, police brutality, generational trauma, suicide, and a few others. If you have any general triggers (cw), I would be cautious with this one since it covers so many issues.

I loved the relationship between Alex and his brother! I really like when books have the sibling relationship as the main relationship instead of a romantic one. Although, there is a romantic relationship in this book, it's not the main plot of the story.

This is definitely the type of book you'll read in one sitting! A unique read with a dash of fantasy that will give you moments of sadness and joy.

Thanks to Simon & Schuster, NetGalley, and LibroFM's Educator program for both an ebook and audiobook version of this book. The premise here is interesting. 16-year old Alex has been cursed with the power to see the future of anything he touches. While it seems like it would be a cool gift, it gets in the way of all of Alex's relationships. He's afraid to touch his girlfriend, friends, and even money from customers at the ice cream shop where he works. When he has a vision of his younger brother dying, he knows he has to take the opportunity to spend time with him while he still can. He has already lost both of his parents as well as his best friend. This book just didn't work for me. I almost gave up on the ebook but then I received an advanced listening copy of the audiobook so I switched to that instead. It didn't click with me either. The story just seemed so unbelievable with all of Alex's losses, his visions, and even his brother's behavior which was well below that of a typical 12-year old. There was an important message about racial bias and profiling, but it didn't show up until the very end. It would have been so much more powerful if it had been more of an ongoing thread throughout the story.

This was honestly a good read that I feel demonstrates how black boys have to grow up way too early sometimes. This was such a heartbreaking read for me. Watching the main character, Alex, have to become a man way before his time, really broke my heart because I grew up with so many of my peers having to do this for various reasons. After the death of his parents, Alex begins seeing visions about every object he touches with his hands. He is shook, when he sees a vision of his brother, Isaiah’s, death; he realizes that he has to drop everything and spend as must time as he can with him.
Throughout the time that Alex and Isaiah spend together, you get to see how they truly form a deeper connection with each other, how they both struggle with the prejudices that come with being a black teen and how the traumatic death of their parents. I love how this book depicts different types of mental health issues and discusses the racial issues that black males face.
I did feel like the last few chapters within this book was rushed because there was so much happening within a sort time frame. I think that those scenes could have truly hit home if the author went into more details about what was going on.

This book was absolutely fantastic. I've already added it to our library collection on preorder and will recommend it to students.

We learn in English class that archetypes and allusions are storytelling devices that help connect us and the stories that we read to larger, shared experiences. Of course, those "shared experiences" aren't nearly as universal as many believe them to be. For a long time, this fiction of universal experience was used as a gatekeeping device in publishing as well as a way to prop up the canon. While gatekeeping in publishing continues to thrive and the canon remains propped, we have begun to see powerful narratives in adolescent fiction that continue to challenge the fiction of universality--that's where Brittney Morris' 'The Cost of Knowing' comes in.

Morris calls 'The Cost of Knowing' a "black-boy-joy-despite" book. Alex Rufus lives with his brother, Isaiah, and their Aunt Mackie. Alex and Isaiah's parents died years ago; while both children experience loss-related trauma, life for Alex isn't all bad. He has a cool Latinx girlfriend, a part-time job at an ice cream shop, and lives in a gated community in Chicago. Also, whenever Alex touches an object, he sees the future through that object.

Admittedly, I remain skeptical of this plot device. For one, it's not that different from Johnny's Smith "dead zone" from the Stephen King novel and adaptations. Not that King has any claim on that concept, but it's a tricky one to pull off successfully. Essentially, 'The Cost of Knowing' is a time travel narrative, and Alex's powers create a causal loop. If I know something will happen, can I take action to stop it? Or, does taking that action cause the thing to happen?

As I kept reading, I began to suspect that inevitability might be part of what Morris was trying to convey. That inevitability, I think, is part of the title's "cost." One doesn't need special powers to know that a Black boy wearing a hoodie in a gated community isn't going to be able to escape racism. One doesn't need special powers to know that the white residents of the gated community, no matter how well-meaning they might be (or think that they are), don't want "those people" around when a rapper is booked at a local venue. What Morris does accomplish with Alex's power to see the future is allow the reader to view that experience from a singular perspective, and she does so with intensity. I suspect that this perspective will resonate with those who share it. For someone like me, though, Morris forces me to see an experience that I don't share in a different light. I was uncomfortable; I felt helpless.

I came to the end of the novel unsure whether the novel's key plot device works, but I'm not sure it matters all that much. The perspective that Morris provides is far more valuable than the relative success of a sci-fi trope.

'The Cost of Knowing,' despite the execution of its central sci-fi trope, is a valuable reading experience, entertaining and gut-wrenching. Morris wants her readers, no matter who they are, to feel Alex's discomfort and have to sit with that discomfort beyond the novel's conclusion. Beyond that discomfort, though, perhaps is the possibility of joy.

I received an eARC of this book from Netgalley.

I loved Brittney Morris's first novel, SLAY. This book is even better.

It's sad, it feels real even with the fantasy elements (our main character can see the future of an object when he touches it), and it's beautifully written.

Definitely recommending this one for purchase in the library where I work.

I really enjoy Brittney Morris, and this was no exception. The story is incredibly engaging, the characters feel real, and I cannot wait to see what she does next. Definitely recommend.

The Cost of Knowing is a book full of worry and anxiety. Alex, who has the power to see in the future, is every bit apprehensive whenever he touches something with his palms. Even though the synopsis warned me that there would be some "magical realism" in the story, I didn't expect it to be… this. He can touch the smallest of inanimate objects and get a vision of coming in contact with it. His endowment seemed more like Deja Vu than a vision, and frankly, how he handles his gift/curse annoyed me.

Morris tries to show a different side of men, Black men to be specific, and how they handle emotion. I loved this. Society has raised us to believe that men are this solid providing being who should take care of anything, no matter the cost or circumstance. Morris wanted to break this myth and show a different side of man. Sometimes you have the providers, and most times, you have people like Alex.

A quick read, but surprising all the same. Following the too short story of the lives of two brothers, The Cost of Knowing discusses what it means to see the past and the future, and the different ways their lives change because of it. Morris' acknowledgements at the end truly drive the story home, calling this her Black-boy-joy-in-spite-of book. Despite all the fear and odds stacked against them just for who they are, Isaiah and Alex both find joy in some of the last moments in the book.

Thank you to Simon Teen and Netgalley for a copy of The Cost of Knowing in exchange for my honest review.

If you had the chance to see the future, would you? After his parents are killed in a car accident, Alex Rufus wakes up with the ability to see the future. It doesn't work quite like you would expect it to. If he holds onto something, like an ice cream scoop, he can see himself using it. How far into the future he can see depends on how far he holds onto an object or touches a person.

When he touches a photograph of his parents, his brother, and himself he sees a few instances of him hold the photograph and the final image is him holding the photograph at his brother's gravesite. This propels Alex on a mission to save his brother from death.

The Cost of Knowing is a heartbreaking story about growing up too soon. In her acknowledgements, Brittney Morris states it's her "love letter to the Black men who had to grow up too early, and for whom the task of being carefree and joyful and Black and male might seem impossible."

I thought Brittney Morris interwove the stories of Alex's family's past beautifully into the narrative explaining elements central to the story of the book. It reinforced the generational trauma felt by his family in the past and present. The Cost of Knowing also focused on societal issues of racism and discrimination that have been problems within the U.S. since before any of us were born. Black lives matter and own voice authors, such as Brittney Morris, are important in the narrative of YA fiction and beyond.

"The Cost of Knowing" is a book that blends magical realism with social commentary, focusing on sixteen-year-old Alex Rufus. Alex is your average teenager in every way except one -- he has the ability to sense the future of an object or person when he touches it with his hands (okay, and maybe your average teenager isn't a black boy whose parents were both killed and now he has to live with his aunt in a ritzy suburb). As you can imagine, this is not ideal for the number of items one has to touch each and every day. Alex tries to navigate his relationships with his friends, his girlfriend, and his brother, which prove challenging when you can see how those relationships will pan out over time. Predictably, Alex runs from this power of his, refusing to get close to his girlfriend, and avoiding people when he sees impending bad news. But that all changes one day when he sees his brother, Isaiah, die, and he realizes he lets this happen, or he tries to stop it. As the two work together to try to stop the future events from happening, Alex and his brother learn about fear and what it means to be black men in 21st century America.

This book took me awhile to get into and read for how short it was. I didn't feel hooked by the story, and perhaps that's because of how long it took to get to what I considered the main conflict. Morris did a great job with the structure of the story because despite that, the early foreshadowing made me want to make it to the end. I also wished this story had decided to be one or the other -- either a book about black masculinity, or a book about racism in America, no matter how intertwined the two may be. I felt like the themes about racial profiling were stereotypical and not as developed as the other half of the story. I thought there were other ways the author could have integrated the racial issue into the story without bringing in the one-dimensional neighbor characters (however warranted that one-dimensionality was!). I usually LOVE when a YA book tackles social commentary, but I think that Morris does include that in many other ways throughout the book! I think Morris could have achieved a similar end had she left this part out and focused more on the experience of navigating masculinity and mental health as a black boy. That is something I don't see in YA much, and for me is a big gap on my classroom bookshelf!

I don't want to spoil anything, so I'll be intentionally vague when I say that one of my favorite parts was where we get to see Alex's heritage and all of his ancestors. I found that powerful and thought more could have been done with that. I also really loved that this book focused on the importance of valuing the mental health of teen boys, and men in general. As Alex discusses his upbringing, his fears, and his reactions to certain situations, I could see the parallels in how I see people raised today. It's okay for men to cry, yes, but it's also okay for them to be afraid, and to not want to have sex because they aren't ready. I like that this book helps take a step towards normalizing these ideas.

I enjoyed this book overall, and ended up reading the second half in one unexpected sitting. While it did take me a bit to get into, I think it was an interesting read that my students will definitely enjoy.

Brittney Morris dedicates this book "to all the Black boys who had to grow up too early," and I think that perfectly sums up this book. One of the things I loved off the bat is that there aren't enough books featuring Black boys and sharing their experiences, and this book finds a way to wonderfully blend the joy and the love that can be a part of the Black boy experience with the difficult moments, the struggles and worries and racism. The book definitely brings about a lot of emotions. And I love that it does it while weaving in a touch of magic. The main character, Alex, has the ability to see the future, and while that may sound cool, for Alex, it just brings a lot of stress, anxiety, and guilt. Honestly, if I suddenly got powers like his I would react in the same way. I love the way that magic is also tied with culture, and it's a take on magic that manages to feel unique.

I really like Alex as a protagonist because no matter what your life or experiences, he is very relatable. He has fears and anxieties that many of us do, and strained relationships with his brother and his girlfriend that he struggles to navigate. I love the brother relationship that is central to the story, and seeing the many moments between them were both heartwarming and heartbreaking. There weren't a lot of moments that were surprising or unexpected, and while the premise of the book seemed high stakes, reading it the plot didn't feel as high stakes as I expected. That being said, I think it was a good character study, a dive into Alex's world in emotions. It's a powerful, emotional look at his world. He's a well-developed character that I was truly invested in by the end of the novel.

Overall I really did like this book. I think SLAY is still my favorite of the two, but if you liked Morris' first book then you should definitely check out this one. It's touching, powerful, and important in its message. And I'm excited to see what Morris will have for us in the future.

TL;DR: A tragic, gripping YA loss-of-innocence tale interwoven with multigenerational magic that demonstrates just how elusive a carefree, joyful childhood is for Black boys in America. My rating: 4 of 5 stars

CW: Anxiety, gun violence, mass shooting, racism, death and grief

After a few chapters, I had a hard time putting The Cost of Knowing down. And yet, I’m having a harder time than usual reviewing this book because the parts of the story that make it so so special feel like spoilers. But I’ll try. In the acknowledgements, Morris writes that before she could write a Black boy joy book, she had to write a “Black-boy-joy-despite book.” The Cost of Knowing is a story about two Black boy brothers (11 and 16) coping with the loss of their parents while living with their aunt in her very affluent and very white gated community in a suburb of Chicago.

On the surface, Alex is just a grieving kid struggling to be the man of the house his father taught him to be--working his ass off for Scoop, the owner of a local ice cream shop (and still unjustly being treated like he is unreliable), to earn a paycheck and provide for the people he loves (like his girlfriend and deceased best friend’s mother, who he surreptitiously sends part of his earnings to).

However, Alex has a secret. Ever since his parents died, he can see the future of every object or person he touches. This is not a superpower, it’s a curse. Alex spends his days trying to avoid the thousands and thousands of visions that he’s plagued by, usually without success. He lives with debilitating anxiety over the things he sees or is afraid he’ll see. One of the smallest but most heartbreaking consequences of Alex’s curse is how isolated it leaves him, starving himself and his loved ones of the healing and comforting physical touches he and they crave. Maybe it’s partially due to a year of being physically isolated due to the pandemic, but I DIED every time Alex wished he could hold his girlfriend’s hand or hug his brother. GIVE THIS BOY A HUG. Besides that, Morris also kept me in my feels with how she wrote Alex’s visions and anxiety. I could imagine how exhausting they were to experience because they were exhausting to read.

One day Alex sees something he can’t unsee--a grave with his little brother’s name on it. With this premonition, he must decide how to spend the last few days of his brother’s life. Alex feels helpless amid thoughts of the many, many dangers that could befall a young Black boy, from a car accident, to a slippery floor, to the Karen nextdoor who bakes the boys cookies at the same time she reveals her racism with colorblind rhetoric and coded language petitioning against a Black rap artist’s performance to keep certain kinds of people out of their safe neighborhood.

Despite being somewhat estranged in the years after their parents' passing, the brothers come together and discover the secrets they’ve each been hiding and how the curse connects them to the magic of their regal ancestors in Africa. I found this part of the storyline particularly affecting given that the legacy of slavery continues to rob Black Americans of their genealogies.

Another aspect of this story that I loved was how this trauma gives Alex the maturity and courage he needs to reject the patriarchal norms of masculinity he grew up on and step away from some of the responsibilities he felt compelled to prematurely take on. No one can give Alex, or frankly any Black boy, the childhood they deserve. But he can learn to set boundaries and prioritize his mental health. He can be open about his feelings and nourish and be nourished in meaningful relationships. He can relish joy wherever he creates it or finds it. His feelings matter.

This story lost a star for me due to my frustration over one plot point. In the days leading up to when he expects his brother’s death, Alex wants to give his brother happy and fun final days. However, in connection with the curse, he’s also set on forcing both himself and his brother to face their worst fears. These motives felt contradictory to me, and I don’t feel like that contradiction was acknowledged or reconciled as Alex vacillated between these conflicting desires.

Also, read the acknowledgements. They’re as beautiful as the story.

Many thanks to NetGalley and Simon and Schuster Children's Publishing for giving me advance access to this book in exchange for an honest review.

Brittney Morris writes the kind of book you can't put down. Her YA characters are compelling and loveable and you just want all the good things for them. If you have not yet read her novel Slay, I suggest you add Slay and The Cost of Knowing to your TBR pile and follow Brittney Morris so you don't miss any of her future books. Reviewing this book is a little tricky because I want to be sure not to spoil anything and yet I want to tell you so much!

On Goodreads, Brittney Morris wrote: "My love letter to all the Black men who had to grow up too early." This love letter is wrapped in an amazing tale about a teen, Alex, who in the aftermath of a car accident that killed his parents on election day, now sees visions of the future whenever he touches any person or object with his hands.

Alex has been managing to be a functioning human for four years even as he is hit with a vision every time he touches anything and the longer the touch continues the further into the future of the object or person's life he sees. Worst of all Alex can't change the future. He tried a few times and it didn't change anything, all the bad things happen. What a nightmare! I could not function.

Brittney Morris gives us an excellent depiction of crippling anxiety and how it affects Alex due to his power. Additionally, she shows how anxiety permeates Alex's life because he is a Black teenager. He has to navigate a world of never-ending minefields. He has to use code-switching not only to hide his power but also to make his existence more palatable to white people.

This is a five-star read for me. It is beautifully descriptive as it deals with hard subjects, you can feel the love Brittney Morris has for the characters on each page you read, and I don't think it would be possible to read this and not love these kids. I stayed up late to finish it and my heart is filled with both joy and deep sadness.

The Cost of Knowing is the sort of book that will stick with me for a very long time; it's a book that makes me want to send a thank-you note to Brittney Morris for putting it out into the world.

This fast-paced book of just a few short days in the lives of two brothers is one of those stunning works that makes writing look simple, the mundane feel weighty, and the extraordinary feel real. It pulls your heart from your chest as it deals with grief, Black masculinity, love, guilt, and superpowers.