Pub Day Book Review: My Side of The River - A Memoir 🌹

A New York Times Editor's Pick
A People Magazine Best Book to Read in February
A Goodreads Most Anticipated Book of 2024

Author: @lizzycancu
Publisher: @stmartinspress
Release Date: Feb 13 (out today!)

⁉️: If there was a moment that you could preserve in your life, what would that be?

For me, it’s moments that are fleeting and limited but equally valuable with my parents. After losing my mom in 2016, I have been feeling anxious to ensure that I get quality time with my dad who is the first most important person in my life.

As a US born citizen, Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez’s memoir is poignant, propulsive, and hard hitting. Imagine having your world turn upside down after suddenly losing your parents when their visas are not denied after taking a routine trip to Mexico. Being forced to stay behind, Elizabeth is forced to restart her life and pursue education while taking care of her young brother alone in a country. As a young student in her high school, she lost the one right that every child to have - right to have her parents due to broken immigrant laws.

For me, the metaphor of the river has stood out to me in the memoir. It reminded me of Edwidge Danticat’s The Farming of Bones where the author also explores how her ancestors were impacted by the river that divided Haiti and Dominican Republic. The river/water/ocean are also a dominant trope in immigrant narratives globally, and Gutierrez’s story as a young teen being forced to overcome her circumstances as a result of the river that divides the United States and Mexico is a story that should be read by everyone. I can’t rate memoirs as I don’t feel right rating someone’s life story but I would strongly recommend this memoir to anyone who loved Educated by Tara Westover and The Distance Between Us by Reyna Grande.

Thank you @stmartinspress for the gifted arc.

#MySideOfTheRiver #ElizabethCa

My Side of the River by Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez

Elizabeth was born in America to illegal immigrant parents from Mexico. Her memoir, which I received from Net Galley, tells of the struggles she and her family encountered throughout her childhood and into young adulthood.

Though her life was difficult and she often suffered alone, there were also people who helped her along the way. The author seems to feel that Mexico had no role in the poverty she and her family endured. I disagree and feel Mexico had the greater burden to keep her family together so they could remain in the country they loved.

Elizabeth’s story, published by St Martin’s Press, flows nicely and is interesting, but I lost patience with her many complaints. She did not convince me that her sacrifices, hard work and free education through college level would be worth it.

Thanks to NetGalley for providing an eARC of this book.
4.25 out of 5 stars

Set against the backdrop of Arizona's and America's growing tensions surrounding immigrants and rampant prejudice, this is a no-holds-barred true tale of the havoc wreaked on families torn apart by borders. Elizabeth, who was born in the United States, lives with her parents at her uncle's house. As she gets older, she sees the volatility of her uncle and aunt's relationship, and eventually her father and brother break ties. They move to a shed on the property of another uncle. Elizabeth sleeps in the bunk above her little brother.

When her parents' visas expire, they leave Elizabeth and her brother with a friend and go back to Mexico to reapply. They are denied, and they apply again, and for whatever reason (they are not given an explanation) they are told not to apply again for three years.

Elizabeth prepares herself for taking care of her little brother, and they cling together in their dark and tumultuous days, but one day Elizabeth gets back to the house from school and finds her brother is gone. Her mom's friend tells her to call her parents. When she does, they tell her that they had her uncle pick up her brother and bring him to them. He is too young to be so far away from them.

Elizabeth is devastated and feels betrayed. But she is given a gift - an option to stay with an old teacher who will help her make her way in America, and she doesn't have to do it alone. Already at the top of her class, when she goes to visit her family in Mexico Elizabeth asks her parents about living with the teacher. Her mom immediately agrees, but her father, with some ax to grind because of his insane, overbearing, money grubbing parents, says no.

So Elizabeth goes on a hunger strike. Eventually, her father relents.

At once heartbreaking, enlightening, touching, and informative, Gutierrez paints a portrait of what many families go through, invisibly, while an alternate narrative is painted for them by people who will never know them.

A shocking story of survival and what it takes to achieve the “American Dream,” at times so far from the comforts of America that it’s hard to believe it’s non-fiction. The US born daughter of Mexican immigrants, Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez was seen as “other” from the moment she entered the hospital nursery. Still, she had an advantage her parents did not- she was an American citizen. But this birthright did not grant Gutierrez any breaks. She grew up sleeping on movie theater benches as her parents worked overnight janitorial shifts under the table. Her family’s presence in America was tenuous; complicated family dynamics compromised their living situation on more than one occasion. Eventually, immigration policy changes force the Gutierrez family back to Mexico. Gutierrez resisted- not willing to waste the sacrifices her parents made to give her an edge up - and she returns to America to complete her high school education. Despite constantly existing in survival mode, Gutierrez is resourceful; scavenging scraps from classmates lunch trays and tirelessly working toward any opportunity to set herself ahead. She is relentless in her pursuit, and eventually her sacrifice pays off. She attains the coveted American education—at top of her class no less—and is admitted to a top college. But the story doesn’t end there, as she faces a new set challenges as she struggles to define her own success. It’s a story of resilience in the face of adversity and highlights many of the issues with the American immigration system. A story beautifully illustrated on a personal level that readers will solemnly identify with.
As a reader who has historically struggled to engage with non-fiction, I absolutely devoured this. As a healthcare worker who interacts with with immigrant populations on a daily basis, this story has gifted me with empathy for the struggles and sacrifices made to simply survive. Buy a copy for yourself and gift a copy to a friend; this is a story that deserves to be told.
Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for the eARC, and thank you to Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez for sharing her story.

My Side of the River is the honest and at times brutal story of the journey one young woman took from the dirt poor daughter of undocumented Mexican immigrants to Ivy League college graduate and beyond. Ms. Gutierrez's story is nothing short of inspirational.

The author's experiences are told without complaint, even when they expose the tragedy bestowed on families because of failed immigration policies. Her undying belief in the power of an education and single-minded efforts to achieve despite huge obstacles were eye-opening.

While not an easy read, My Side of the River should be required reading for our policy makers and for anyone working in the educational systems. The story points out not only flaws in our systems, but also the power of teachers and other supportive adults in the lives of children.

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for the digital ARC of My Side of the River by Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez. The opinions in this review are my own.

I enjoyed reading about Elizabeth’s story of trying to survive in the US on her own, while her parents were stuck in Mexico. It was interesting to hear about how she survived growing up poor with undocumented parents and family members. I enjoyed seeing the role family plays in Mexican culture, even when individuals don’t get along. There really is a strong dedication to family.

The part of the book where Elizabeth is on her own, trying to make it through high school so she can get into college, is very powerful. I was rooting for her during this extremely difficult time. She overcame a lot to make it to college!

I feel like there were more details about daily life in the earlier part of her life and book. I found those parts more interesting. I would have liked the details to continue throughout the later parts of the book.

I also felt like the book just stopped. The ending didn’t feel like an ending. I felt that there needed to be more of a conclusion. Maybe more information about what she hopes is ahead of her.

Overall, I enjoyed the story. The writing was good, but I would have liked more details about daily life, especially later in the story, and I feel like the story could have been wrapped up better.

Thanks to NetGalley for an early copy of this book!

I have been on an emotional roller coaster the past two days. Before retiring as a high school English teacher in a small town in the Midwest, I taught many students like Elizabeth. Education was very important to so many of them. I saw them living in difficult circumstances yet persevere to continue their education and become successful. I keep in contact with many of my students.

Elizabeth’s struggles and the ability to overcome so many hardships made her story compelling to the reader. I think her book is a must read for all teachers! I know I will be recommending MY SIDE OF THE RIVER to my book club of retired English teachers! My thanks to St. Martin’s Press and NetGalley for an ARC of this book. The opinions in this review are my own.

Excuse me while I rave on this book for the next few minutes! 5 stars! Honestly one of the best, if not THE BEST, memoirs I have ever read. I would generously compare this to other memoirs like Educated.
“Elizabeth, tú tienes que ser la mejor. You have got to be the best.”
But wasn't it beautiful when she finally got to be the best for herself?
My Side of the River was a touching memoir that I couldn't help from reading into the wee hours of the night. Watching Elizabeth grow up in this book and grow into the successful woman she was today was so moving. it is so important for all of us to look around and acknowledge the privilege we have been granted simply for being born into this country. The obstacles immigrants have to face in order to become law abiding citizens of this country with a broken system are quite simply that, broken. Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez story will stick with me for a while.
“I guess white skin and guns weren’t considered to be a suitable combination to villainize.”
Truer words have never been spoken. In a time when America was too concerned with profiling brown people we were over ran by mass shootings. All of that seemed to be okay as long as we we’re able to ask our darker skinned neighbor for his ID for no cause.
“I’m not your burden anymore, I thought to myself as I walked out of their home”
The only complaint I could ever have about her story is never getting to see her stick it to Diane. You were never her burden. Although In the end we get to see her heal from that trauma beautifully and come full circle.
“I would rather us go into debt than have you or anyone you know skimp on food and be hungry”

Thank you, NetGalley and St Marten’s Press for this advanced reader’s copy. I already had this memoir on my radar and was super excited to read it early. Honest and amazing memoir from a first-generation Mexican daughter which details all she went through to not just graduate from high school, but excel while sleeping on someone’s couch as her parents were deported, get accepted to an Ivy League school, and grow up to care for little brother and her family. This author shows the lengths people will go to and the sacrifices people will make to be able to care for their family and give them a better life.

Such a candid memoir about the experience of a scholarly daughter of immigrant parents who are deported when she’s in 15. So well written and I loved Gutierrez’s voice. The world needs to hear more stories like this.

As a first generation Mexican American, so much of her story resonated with me. I grew up in a community that is 90% Hispanic and it felt like I knew exactly where Elizabeth was coming from. Her story is the story of so many others and the fact that she prevailed despite the endless obstacles before her is so incredibly inspiring. I especially appreciated her raw honestly. She did not shy away from the ugly thoughts and emotions she navigated and it was so real. I was rooting for her every step of the way. This here is a girl who fought tooth and nail to succeed and damn does she have some things to say. If you’re a fan of memoirs, this is not to be missed.

This is so random and I didn’t make the connection before reading this book, but I was on a TED talk kick a few years back and remember watching hers! I loved when she talked about it in her book.

{3.5 stars}

"I wondered about the responsibility I bore to make something of myself but never for myself."

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Elizabeth is an American born to Mexican immigrants visiting the country on a visa. She talks about her youth watching her parents hustle for work, never being paid for their value and always fearful of being deported. She had to live with family members dealing with sharing a small space amongst so many family members and the issues that caused. A gifted student, she had to deal with the pressure of living up to the American dream when she was afforded none of the comfort and rights offered to most Americans. When her parents are deported, she must decide whether to go with them to a country she is not native to and start over, or to continue on in America as a homeless, essentially parent-less youth. She lives with a family and while she is given a roof and some stability, she still deals with food insecurity and lack of affection and counsel that youth need. Despite that, she is successful but she details how much it took out of her and how unhappy she was along the way.

"Poverty teaches you a resourcefulness you never need to learn if you are nurtured in privilege."
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While I can not personally identify with the immigrant part nor the reality of having brown skin in America. I can identify with growing up in poverty and with very little hope for a future that isn't built by your own hands, blood, sweat and tears. I really resonated with the second part of her life story, the struggle to get into college with a scholarship and make the right choices for your future with no one to help you through that battle.

The third part lost me a bit, I struggled with how jaded she was and a bit of a loss of gratitude. She found a sense of contentment in the end but getting through the last third was a bit harder for me.

Thanks to St Martin's Press for gifted access via Netgalley. All opinions above are my own.

I won’t be getting into what I think about the author’s parents and their decision to come to America and abuse their visa. That is a discussion that is not meant for this review, nor is it a time to touch on the American immigration system when it comes to someone’s memoir—in my opinion—because what is important is the author’s thoughts and experiences and not my own.

Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez writes a powerful memoir about her resilience growing up as a first generation immigrant in Arizona. She has overcome obstacles that me—a white, middle class woman—could never experience, and her memoir has given me a glimpse into a life that isn’t my own. Her writing flows well and I could feel her emotions—that intense sadness and pressure of going to high school and living with a family who didn’t necessarily want her there, her going to bed hungry until her school helped her. Her parents were back in Mexico but couldn’t get back to her and her brother, but through it all and even when she was alone, she fought her way to the top, and as her parents’ wanted, she was the best. I am grateful to have read and gotten to experience through her memoir the life of a first gen Mexican immigrant to further expand my knowledge and empathy to others who aren’t like me.

My one critique and it is very small, is that I thought there were too many time skips and gaps but thinking about it, maybe the author did this because of all the traumatic events she went through, and if that’s the case, I can understand why she didn’t give more details into her childhood.

A look at the life of one young immigrant who must navigate life in America on her own when she's separated from her parents.

The expectations and responsibilities weigh heavily on Elizabeth's fifteen year old shoulders and she goes through every emotion - fear, resentment, despair, gratitude, etc as she manages to get through every day.

A book for everyone, no matter your provenance.

After finishing Elizabeth Camarillo Gutierrez's memoir My Side of the River, I decided to wait three days before sitting down to compose my thoughts. My feelings about what I had read, along with my general impression of Gutierrez herself, were all over the map - and they still are. On the one hand, I greatly admire her work ethic and all that she has accomplished in her young life; on the other I can't help but resent a little her attitude toward the country that, despite the obstacles she faced, made it possible for Gutierrez to accomplish all that she has.

Gutierrez's story is a remarkable one. Her mother, as soon as she learned that she was pregnant with her first child, was determined to do whatever it took to give birth to that child in the United States rather than in Mexico. So baby Elizabeth was born in a Tucson hospital even though her parents returned to Mexico with her shortly thereafter. The family did not again take up residence in the U.S. until Elizabeth was four years old, and her younger brother would be born and start school in this country before expiration of her parents' tourist visas tore the family apart.

Elizabeth and Fernando remained in the U.S. while their parents unsuccessfully applied for new tourist visas. Suddenly Elizabeth, who was about to begin high school at the head of her class, was alone and responsible for the welfare of her little brother. That she would somehow manage to graduate at the head of her high school class and win scholarships to many of the best universities in the country is truly remarkable. Focusing on her mother's advice that she should always be the best student in the classroom, Elizabeth accomplished the near-impossible.

And despite becoming rather disillusioned by her experience in the banking industry, she has continued to do so.

That's the positive part of Gutierrez's story, but it's not the only part. At times she allows her accomplishments to be overshadowed by her resentment of U.S. immigration policy and a slip-of-the-tongue racism, such as when she accuses corporations in this country of "rushing to cover their white asses" after George Floyd's death. Or when she brags about gaming the system in order to "steal a little back" for herself as victim of what happened between Mexico and the U.S. in the mid-nineteenth century.

Gutierrez is right about a lot of what she says and feels about the way immigrants are treated in the U.S. but what she fails to mention or to understand is that it is different for legal immigrants than it is for those who cross the border illegally. The resentment and criticism she feels largely results from the way that too many immigrants abuse the system she is so critical of. That is certainly not to say that people like her parents are not in turn abused by having to take the low-paying jobs that will allow them to remain in the shadows. America's immigration system is broken, and immigration law, no doubt, desperately needs to be rewritten.

I recommend that everyone read My Side of the River and books like it with an open mind. There are good and bad guys on both sides of the equation, and both sides are as often wrong as they are right. People want a better life for their children than the one they had. It's always been that way, and it always will be that way. Surely there is a better way for us to work together to make that dream come true for more people.

A thoughtful and thought provoking memoir that emphasizes resiliency and determination. While this situation might be familiar, it's unique in its contours- and Camarillo Gutierrez explains what really happens to those unaccompanied homeless children when their parents are deported. This could have easily become a screed but it's not. Unfortunately, those who should read her story likely will not so those who do should share the lessons. Thanks to netgalley for the ARC. Beautifully written memoir.

I really loved this honest memoir about perseverance and determination. Elizabeth’’s story highlights the challenges of families being separated by citizenship and the struggles of establishing a life in the US. I was rooting for her success and happiness and couldn’t put the book down until I knew how it ended. It also highlighted relevant points as boarder crossing continues to be a big topic of conversation and government policy.

Thanks to Netgalley and St Martin's Publishing Group for the ARC. My Side of the River follows the experiences of the author as a first generation U.S. citizen. The book is well written and the author's story is inspiring.

I think this is a beautiful and important book. It's also very timely with all the criticism of immigration in the USA. I am excited for my library patrons to read this book. For some this book will be a mirror of their own experience, but especially in my area, I think this will be an impactful window into another's experiences.

A poignant, eloquent memoir of an immigrant family’s struggles to come to the United States and make a better life for themselves and their children. The pressure on the eldest daughter to be the best was immense and the obstacles that she had to overcome were at times daunting. Her detailed account of her life was quite moving and gave me insight into the plight of immigrants coming to the U. S. Thank you NetGalley for providing the ARC.

Should anyone in their twenties write a memoir? My Side of the River is my latest attempt at reading one, and I ultimately concluded that this author should have waited. While Camarillo Gutierrez has a compelling life story to date, there needs to be more substance, self-reflection, and maturity to constitute a memoir. Reading her book, I felt it was another box checked by the author as she plans a political career. Much of the narrative chronologically accounts for the author's day-to-day activities - TMI. I kept waiting for some tension to develop, but the moment never arrived. I wasn't very excited about picking it up, and I was going to DNF it, but I decided to read the book as an anthropologic observation of a GenZ coming of age - then I enjoyed it more.

This said I have a strong interest in Elizabeth's story. An undocumented young man joined my family in 9th grade when he had a family crisis not unlike Elizabeth's. So I get it. But what does the author want us to take away from her book? There are no policy recommendations, no recommendations on how we could help children like her, and no way forward.

Thanks to NetGalley for providing me with an electronic ARC in exchange for a review.