5 stars! I picked this book in large part because of the title and boy am I glad!!! I so thoroughly enjoyed, more than I could have guessed. I thought the mix of memoir and "self-help" was great and I found myself empathetic for Carla but even more so, for myself and all women. The more specific a book is, the more universal and that rings true for this book - it was specific to her experience but god so unbelievably relatable. I genuinely feel changed after reading it. The stories and the themes were big and important but also human and full of clever comedy. I would recommend this to everyone.

This was a beautiful memoir about one woman and her journey to accepting her body due to a deformity. Thank you to the publisher for a copy of this book! I don’t normally read memoirs so this isn’t a book that I would normally have picked up, but I’m so thankful I did!

Going on this journey with her author through her words was a remarkable experience. I felt so many emotions throughout and it was a beautiful memoir.

It was interesting to see the authors perspective of living with KT. I did feel there was a lot of privilege that came up, that is acknowledged but it was a bit annoying.

This was a really interesting essay collection! Some essays landed more than others, but I really appreciated when she explored the dichotomy of writing about her life publicly vs. what was really going on in her actual life and loved how honest she was about her body insecurities and explorations, medications, shopping addiction, etc.

I was immediately drawn to this book after reading the title. “I’ll Look So Hot in a Coffin” is exactly my type of humor, and I had to know more. I went into this one completely blind (as I do a large portion of the time - I’m sorry but I tend to judge books by their titles AND covers 🙈) and I was not disappointed at all. While at times it was a bit hard to get through, and slightly triggering being in my 30s with body image struggles and everything else that goes along with being a woman, it was equally delightful. To find comfort in the only body you’ve ever had, the only one you ever will have is a beautiful thing. Thank you for your snark and your lovely words, Carla Sosenko! And thank you NetGalley and The Dial Press for an arc in exchange for an honest review.

Unfortunately, I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin didn’t work for me, and I ended up putting it down before finishing. While the premise—a brutally honest memoir about living with a rare medical condition—sounded intriguing and important, the execution felt uneven and hard to stay engaged with.

The tone often wavered between confessional and performative, which made it difficult to connect emotionally. There were moments where the humor felt forced or distracted from the depth of the subject matter, rather than enhancing it. I found myself struggling to follow the narrative thread or fully invest in the author's voice.

This may resonate more with readers looking for an unconventional memoir with a sharp edge, but it ultimately wasn’t the right fit for me.

My Selling Pitch:
Self helpy body positivity memoir, but it feels inauthentic because the author’s trying to give advice for a journey she’s clearly still on.

Pre-reading:
Good god, I love this cover. I'm in the midst of the worst body image/body dysmorphia spiral of my life, and I think this book may have found me at the perfect moment, even if it'll be a hard read.

(obviously potential spoilers from here on)
Thick of it:
Twilight reference

Men are so predominantly terrible to women it is UNREAL.

So I did Google the author and look at her Instagram. It does feel a little hypocritical to be like I’m not gonna change my body with medical devices anymore, but then she’s used ozempic enough to make art pieces out of it.

So I wouldn’t define that as a playful parent. I would define that as a parent more concerned with keeping up appearances than the backlash any unsavoriness necessary to maintain them generates. Ends and means and all that.

Wait, is she saying her parents fucked next to her hotel rooms because that’s beyond- Like that’s not a funny little aside. That’s insane and abusive and how are we just glossing over that???

It is very hard to sympathize with nepo baby has her rent paid. Cosmetic deformity or not.

… I don’t know if it’s a symptom of being a few years younger than her, but it really does just scream privileged white girl that she’s never considered other people also have it hard before. Like she’s kind of a walking stereotype.

I want to take Ozempic so badly🙃✌️(but that would mean going to the doctor and I pathologically cannot.)

You don’t want to have kids, but you froze your eggs. I want to like her because she’s attempting to be open and honest about her experience, but I find her so grating, and hypocritical, and manic. (And just the sheer amount of money she’s wasted. I am too much of a Capricorn for this.)

And I'm so bummed the fuck out. I don’t think this book is actually helping. I think it might be making me feel worse.

Ma'am, this is not the guy. Please.

Ma'am. You are 36. What hope is there for the rest of us if even 36 is getting fooled by the most textbook shitbag men.

MA’AM. Be so fucking for real. If your boyfriend is an incel sympathizer-STAND THE FUCK UP.

… I know, I know don’t victim blame, but also I will never be with a person who says things like that. It happens once, I am gone.

How is well, I wouldn’t do it to you acceptable? He would still do it to someone. How are you OK with that?

I feel like she’s still just in denial. I’m scared I won’t ever have it, so I don’t actually care about it anymore. And I’m just like girl, if you actually didn’t care you wouldn’t be exerting so much energy trying to convince us that you don’t care.

I know trauma isn’t a competition, but it does seem a lot of hers is just spoiled little rich girl, and I’m getting a little tired listening to it.

A Libra? Committing? Girl-

This reads more like a collection of essays than a proper memoir, and we’re doing so much time jumping, that I no longer know what age she is during any of these events. It doesn’t really matter though because she reads like a messy 20 something- a messy early 20 something the entire time!

I'm like so positive I have ADHD and autism at this point lmao. They done missed all of us and our mamas.

I want to be hidden. Let me publish an entire book about my life. It’s just not making sense, babe.

What do you mean you hope we’ll hate them too? Girl. Girl. It is nuts that you can claim to be a liberal feminist and not hate these men from the jump.

It does just feel a bit tone-deaf to be like I finally like myself after she’s gotten rid of the weight, you know? (And I know she tried to address this in a chapter, but I feel like she’s failing to consider whether or not she would still like herself at this age, with the tattoos, with whatever-if she hadn’t started weight loss injections? Would she still love herself like this if she got off the injections and gained the weight back?)

This feels like a homework assignment your therapist gave you that you realized you could sell and not like a book you actually wanted to write on your own.

It just feels so inauthentic, ma’am.

It feels like she’s desperately chanting I love my body now! See? But I don’t think any of us believe her, and not because she shouldn’t love her body, but just because the emotion doesn’t feel genuine in the way, she’s expressing it. It still feels performative and like she’s projecting. She’s like let me dole out this advice, and then I’m an authority on it. Then I’m gaining social currency again. If other people believe I’m morally superior, maybe I can start believing it too. Like it’s just not working for me.

Post-reading:
I’ll fully admit that I’m not in the best headspace right now, but I don’t think this book helped with my spiral. I think if anything, it sent me further down it. I think it’s really hard to be plus size in Ozempic times and keep reading everywhere you go that this is the solution and being fat is actually the worst thing your body can be, so omg, why aren’t you fixing it? Why are you doing literally anything else? Getting smaller should be your priority always! And I don’t think it’s helped by other fat women caving to pressure or genuinely wanting to take these weight loss injections and then preaching that people should love their bodies as they are! But also they definitely like theirs more now that they’re skinny, and it was in fact worth all the side effects. And like it’s really hard to resist that siren call to go on it! And then you’re like if I want to change THAT badly that I’m consumed by it, I clearly must hate my current body so so SO much. And this book didn’t help with that.

Unfortunately, I think a lot of it is common sense, I fear. It comes from an incredibly privileged standpoint. I don’t think it’s our job or right to gatekeep trauma or disability, but if you Google this author, she is very pretty, and has a successful career, and isn’t struggling for money. She has friends. She has family. She has a support system. It’s just hard to feel the amount of sympathy her victim complex is begging you for.

And it’s not that I feel no sympathy for her. She did not have it easy. The world is not fair. But if being ugly is your chief concern in life… I mean to use her own meme, Kim, there’s people dying. I think poor self-esteem is an incredibly difficult thing to live with, but she has access to therapy. She has the time and money to work on it. And she is working on it. I just don’t think she was ready to write a self-help style book on it.

It reminded me a lot of a sex science book that I read a year or two ago. (Laid and Confused, if you were curious.) That book came off as more of a memoir than a scientific, journalistic exploration. It was kind of like good start, bestie! Everyone interested in this subject matter that would pick up this book has already reached those conclusions, but please keep at it and maybe you’ll arrive at something new and valuable. I feel the same way about this book. If you’re picking up a book about body positivity, you have already had people try to jam it down your throat that you just need to radically accept yourself and you’ll reach enlightenment and start singing Kumbaya and never feel insecure again! This book doesn’t do anything different.

And with the amount of energy, this author is exerting trying to convince you that she’s accepted herself, I don’t think anyone’s gonna buy it. Her writing comes across as a bit disorganized and manic. I think the bipolar familial history and ADHD diagnosis are pretty evident in the structuring of this novel. We jump around from life event to life event as it suits each chapter’s narrative to the point that the author’s age and timeline get so hazy. It doesn’t feel like a cohesive retelling of her life. It feels like a therapy exercise that was developed into a series of essays. And it just didn’t work for me.

I do think the book gave me one really good takeaway though. I like the idea that people you go on dates with should have to earn your story. You should not just volunteer it. You don’t owe them a laundry list of disclaimers from the jump. If you get annoyed when authors infodump a tragic backstory in the first chapter, why would you do it to someone you want a relationship with? And that was a little groundbreaking for me. I don’t think anyone’s ever said anything like that to me before. And I am a chronic oversharer. (Read wildly undiagnosed.) I’d been pitched that trauma dumping is trying to shortcut emotional intimacy before. And I buy that. This seems like a natural progression of that or a psychological prologue that I’m just now getting. And I like it a lot. I will be taking this with me.

The book as a whole though… I just don’t know who the audience is. I think if you’re suffering with your sense of self-esteem, this isn’t going to be the book that turns it around. I think it’s a little too hypocritical to read as genuine, and authenticity is the most valuable thing in a memoir. It’s really its only job. I don’t think the writing is poor enough to land this on my do not read list. (I would also feel incredibly shitty putting someone’s lived experience on a do not read list.) But I don’t think anyone needs to rush out and read this. I’d be hesitant to try the author again. I don’t think I really meshed with her writing and viewpoints. I think it’s just too familiar of a struggle with pretty opposing coping mechanisms. Caps and Libras, man. What are you gonna do?

Also, I know most authors don’t have a say in their covers, but it does feel incredibly tone-deaf to edit out the author’s disfigurement on the cover. The legs should be two different sizes. How are you gonna write a book about your own body positivity and still put a different girl’s legs on the cover? I feel like that’s just the cherry on top of why I think this author’s full of shit.

Who should read this:
Body positivity fans
NYC memoir fans

Ideal reading time:
Anytime

Do I want to reread this:
No.

Would I buy this:
No. (The amount of pretty covers kept from my shelf by what they contain-)

Similar books:
* Laid and Confused by Maria Yagoda-essay on sex culture, but reads like a messy memoir
* Horse Barbie by Geena Rocero-memoir
* The Observable Universe by Heather McCalden-examination of grief and technology, sorta memoir
* Death Valley by Melissa Broder-surrealist lit fic
* I Love You But I've Chosen Darkness by Claire Vaye Watkins-lit fic, family drama, pseudo memoir

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

The concept behind I’ll Look So Hot in a Coffin is compelling, but the delivery doesn't quite work. The humor feels strained, and the memoir jumps around too much to build a strong emotional connection. While Sosenko’s experiences matter, the writing often comes off as self-involved and unfocused.

Carla Sosenko was born with Klippel-Trenaunay Syndrome, a rare condition that can come with port wine stains, vascular issues, uneven limb sizes, and abnormalities with bones and tissues. Though I (unsurprisingly) hadn't heard of KTS before, I'm always looking for stories from other people with medical conditions or chronic illnesses. They affect a significant amount of people, yet their visibility in publishing is often lackluster. I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin is one tiny wedge in the pie chart increasing that visibility.

I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin is a memoir compiled into a collection of essays that follow key moments, formative experiences, or lessons learned throughout Carla's life. She shares vulnerable childhood moments of feeling othered by those around her; even her extremely loving and supportive parents made some decisions in her childhood that left Carla feeling helpless in her own body. There are several sections that discuss disordered eating, partner abuse, and severe anxiety and depression. Sosenko keeps the mood relatively upbeat and balances out some of the most distressing topics to more of a somber feeling, but beware if you are sensitive to any of these topics as triggers (especially on the ED/body image front).

While KTS is ever-present in this collection, it's rarely the main focus. Instead of laying out endless pages of surely traumatizing medical experiences, Sosenko gives enough detail to understand the ways in which KTS has affected her life while preventing it from seeming like the only focus in it. Did it affect her development of an ED? Yes, certainly, but the areas discussing that are much more focused on her feelings and navigation choices rather than simply serving as another example of KTS being the villain. This is a huge benefit to the reader, as Sosenko's wry narration is well structured while feeling conversational. Without knowing her personally, it truly feels like it's in her voice.

Sosenko has learned KTS as an inextricable part of her, and she's got to at least coexist with it if she wants to enjoy her life to the fullest. I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin makes it clear that there's no KTS bogeyman here. It's all Sosenko.

Thank you to Net Galley and Random House for the ARC in exchange for my honest review. I was not familiar with the author but was drawn in by the title. This memoir is touching, candid and humorous. The author has a type of body deformity caused by rare disorder that has resulted in a large mass on her back, uneven sized legs and a hunched posture. Having to deal with this as a young child on, she has tried to hide or disguise it but has also tried to just show it as it is. She shares stories about having liposuction at a young age, attending weight watchers to lose weight and trying Ozempic, being in a high profile career and her obsession with fashion. Overall, the world looks at her as not enough and an outsider for being disabled but she comes to the realization that she is just different and a place where she can accept and embrace her body for what it is.

I’ll look so hot in a coffin was a funny, raw, vulnerable memoir. I loved the author’s style of writing and would read more.

I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin by Carla Sosenko is a great memoir and solo debut. Carla Sosenko, born with a rare genetic disease called Klippel-Trenaunay syndrome Sosenko takes us through her journey coming to terms with her disease and ultimate acceptance of her body. Dealing with the themes of self-image, mental health, and how we imagine our lives, she brings a refreshing perspective and often had me laughing out loud.

I strongly recommend that everyone reads this book.

Thank you Random House Publishing Group - Random House | The Dial Press for the opportunity to read this book. All opinions are my own.

Rating: 5 Stars
Pub Date: May 06 2025

#RandomHousePublishingGroup
#TheDialPress
#IllLookSoHotinaCoffin
#Memoir
#BodyImage
#MentalHealty
#VascularDisorder
#yarisbooknook
#netgalley

This was such a refreshing and open take on what it's like living with a visible disability. It was such a learning experience, while also bringing humor and levity to such a hard conversation.

Thank you to Random House and Netgalley for the ARC! I think I'm landing at a 3.25-3.5 with this one. While I did learn a little bit and enjoyed the author's candor, I felt it was a bit too voice-y at times and found her insufferable more than I was anticipating (we get it! you have a gorgeous face despite having physical deformaties on your back and legs....). Nose gym is something I will never forget though!

3.5 stars. I wasn’t previously aware of Carla Sosenko before reading this book, but the title and book cover really caught my attention. Carla describes her childhood living with and navigating doctors and medical procedures to treat Klippel-Trénaunay syndrome. K-T as Carla calls it, is a rare, lifelong genetic condition that affects the development of blood vessels, soft tissues, bones, and sometimes the lymphatic system, and is characterized by a triad of symptoms: abnormal bone and soft tissue growth, venous malformations, and a port-wine stain birthmark. Carla starts off her book highlighting that while K-T can be life threatening or a disability to some, she is lucky in that regard. K-T has, however, provided her with a body that is visibly different.

Carla’s family treated the hypertrophy of tissue on her back and leg with liposuction procedures at a young age, and she’s had the varicose veins embolized as an adult. I’ve seen other reviewers mention the privilege Carla clearly has had in her experience with K-T, and while that is a valid point in her unique experience with K-T, I don’t think it takes away from the impacts all of these experiences have on shaping who Carla has become. While it may be difficult for others with K-T without that privilege to feel they can relate or achieve the same successful and normal life, I’m not sure that was the point of Carla sharing her life with us.

In Carla’s life, it seems she has been very lucky to be surrounded by supportive friends and family, had treatment options available to her, and never seemed to struggle for money or success. She shares dating woes that are comical and generally normal seeming, though her personal anxieties about her appearance certainly change the perspective. She’s experienced great success in her career, despite her anxiety and adhd.

I really enjoyed Carla’s dark humor and her snarkiness throughout the book. She is a good storyteller, and I appreciate her sharing her life with readers.

Thank you to NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Reading Carla Sosenko’s memoir is an experience about as unusual as the woman herself. She is an everywoman who has a visible congenital condition. Because we understand better what we see with our eyes than what we are told, it puts her in a stronger place to teach us her lived experience about how the world sees people who look different than the majority. With invisible-to-the eye internal conditions, it requires too much of our imagination, sadly, to get it. In Carla’s case, she can point to specific things people say to her and how they gaze at or touch her and why these things aren’t helpful at best and wildly inappropriate at worst.

Carla will make clear, however, that her experiences are greater than one thing. It would be “easy to think I am everything I am (and am not) because of this rare disorder that I happen to be born with… But that logic is faulty,” she says, “because none of us can separate out any one part of ourselves and still be ourselves.”

In this book you will meet a public figure, a fearless and gregarious woman who is prone to FOMO, incessantly on the go, addicted to fashion, plagued with anxiety, who sees social drinking and serial dating as Olympian challenges, and who somehow managed the calendar well enough to become successful in her chosen field. Age and experience have tempered much of this along with how she responds to the world, but this book is more about her before, not her now. It is closer in the timeline of the now Carla when she is diagnosed with ADHD, which has been revelatory in understanding herself. While far from knowing much about this diagnosis, I can imagine the “H” presenting to others as high energy and exuberance that can be positively infectious. Reading this book, you will see that.

While you might think the everywoman description is a bit off kilter, you will learn that Carla is afflicted with the same challenges, terrors, heartbreaks, humiliations, addictions, and insecurities we all have to one degree or another. After all, we women and a lot of men are under the same cultural expectations as she. One example is the section on the Drinking Game, which she says measures how culturally widespread the conditioning is to accept that some bodies are good, and others are bad. It follows a deep dive into the culture of the ideal body size and Carla’s long experience with dieting. It’s an eyeopener.

Because this book expands decades and is dense in the telling, there might seem to be some contradictions in it, which makes it difficult to describe a “take away.” These factors also make it more challenging to keep up with the nuances between one statement and a seemingly contradictory other at another place in the book. For example, she reflects on how at times she wouldn’t leave a restaurant table without covering her back or how she crept in and out of pools to avoid too many eyes falling on her or how she dressed in knee-high boots and skirts that showed only an inch of her unmatched legs. Then, we read a section like this in roughly the same time period, which is about her shopping compulsion and so perfectly describes the woman who jumps through the pages that I couldn’t agree with myself as to where to cut off these quotes—

“I am too conceited, too afraid of missing out, too garrulous, too Libyan. I can’t not express myself through fashion. It truly never felt like an option. Compulsion or not, I am happy about it… My weird body ultimately, unwittingly elevated my style, or at least made it more interesting than my peers’. All my clothes said “look at me” in one way or another. I think that’s a really good thing for someone who is born with a disorder that makes her body prone to standing out already. Grandiosity-wise nothing feels off limits. I am not a person who has ever looks at something opulent or over-the-top or eye-grabbing or major or costuming or severe and thought I couldn’t pull that off. What I’m saying is that, for me, decorating myself like I am a fucking present and forcing the world to look at me is and always will be the biggest rush ever...”

I hope Carla accomplishes her goal of giving others who share her experiences a shortcut in their own paths. She says she is still learning and doesn’t have all the answers, but she hopes her story is reassuring.

Many thanks to Random House Publishing Group—Random House and NetGalley for providing this e-galley.
#IllLookSoHotinaCoffin #NetGalley

This is the best book title I've seen in a while. Born with a very rare health condition, Sosenko was a pretty face attached to what she considered to be a grotesque body. I was horrified at the insensitive things people did (touching her back without asking if it was okay) and the ugly comments they felt it was all right to make, especially men. I am glad that the author realized that she is just find exactly how she is and absolutely entitled to live her life how she wants. Sensitive readers should be aware of subjects that may be triggers including mental illness, wanting to die. physical disability, abusive relationships, and stupid insensitive people (who are unfortunately ubiquitous). Will appeal to readers who enjoyed Jennette McCurdy's memoir I'm Glad My Mom is Dead.

I'll Look So Hot in a Coffin is a title that instantly drew me in. Although the book ended up being something different to what I originally thought, I still greatly enjoyed reading it. I loved the formatting and writing of this book, it felt more like a close friend was telling me stories. Witty, blunt, vulnerable, and very relatable. I would love to read more from Carla Sosenko again.

Thank you to NetGalley and Random House Publishing Group - Random House | The Dial Press for an ARC copy!

I'LL LOOK SO HOT IN A COFFIN by Carla Sosenko covers so much territory, it's a little tough to describe it as strictly a memoir or self-help type of story. Born with a syndrome that distinguishes her from everyone else, Sosenko has suffered, endured, and prevailed so much of our culture's strange and disjointed beliefs about beauty, body image, and what it means to be successful in this world. I applaud her courage in sharing her story and stirring the pot of our fears, assumptions, and what happens when we let go of all of that and live. I received a copy of this book and these thoughts are my own, unbiased opinions.

I think the humour in this is akin to Jennette McCurdy's memoir but I feel like sometimes it doesn't dive deep enough into the why's of everything. I liked it but I don't think it was especially memorable unfortunately.