All Grown Up

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Pub Date Jun 04 2017 | Archive Date Jul 06 2017

Description

An enthralling confession of a woman contending with the outside world's expectations of who she should be.

Andrea is a single, childless 39-year-old woman who tries to navigate family, sexuality, friendships and a career she never wanted, but battles with thoughts and desires that few people would want to face up to.

Told in gut-wrenchingly honest language that shimmers with rage and intimacy, All Grown Up poses such questions as:

- What if I don't want to hold your baby?
- Can I date you without ever hearing about your divorce?
- What can I demand of my mother now that I am an adult?
- Is therapy pointless?
- At what point does drinking a lot become a drinking problem?
- Why does everyone keep asking me why I am not married?

Powerfully intelligent and wickedly funny, All Grown Up delves into the psyche of a flawed but mesmerising character. Readers will recognise themselves in Jami Attenberg's truthful account of what it means to be a 21st century woman, though they might not always want to admit it.

An enthralling confession of a woman contending with the outside world's expectations of who she should be.

Andrea is a single, childless 39-year-old woman who tries to navigate family, sexuality...


Advance Praise

‘Hilarious, courageous and mesmerizing from page one, ALL GROWN UP is a little gem that packs a devastating wallop. It's that rare book I'm dying to give all my friends so we can discuss it deep into the night. I'm in awe of Jami Attenberg.’ - Maria Semple, author of Where'd You Go Bernadette

‘One of the smartest and truest novels I've read about being a single woman.’ Hadley Freeman, Guardian

‘Jami Attenberg has written her frankest, funniest, and most riveting and heartbreaking book yet.’ Emily Gould, author of Friendship

‘Is all life junk - sparkly and seductive and devastating - just waiting to be told correctly by someone who will hold our hand and walk with us a while confirming that what we're living is true. This is a good proud urban book, a sad and specific blast for the fearless to read. Thank you Jami.’ Eileen Myles, author of Chelsea Girls                          

‘Jami Attenberg's Andrea is the most addicting female protagonist voice I have read in years, with her cutting observations on human relationships. This witty journey through a mess of men, female friendships, family and boozy urban existence positions the single girl not as object to be fixed but as contemporary sage and seer: the ultimate witness of truth in love today.’ Melissa Broder, author of So Sad Today

‘Hilarious, courageous and mesmerizing from page one, ALL GROWN UP is a little gem that packs a devastating wallop. It's that rare book I'm dying to give all my friends so we can discuss it...


Available Editions

EDITION Hardcover
ISBN 9781781257043
PRICE £12.99 (GBP)

Average rating from 26 members


Featured Reviews

A high 4 stars! I really liked All Grown Up. I liked the ways it's written and the raw and honest emotions it depicts. Andrea lives in New York, where she grew up with her activist mother, drug addicted father and musician brother. Andrea hoped to be an artists but ends up in a low end corporate job. She is eternally single, and has a tendency to drink too much and cycle through not particularly satisfying encounters and short relationships. Told from Andrea's perspective, each chapter almost reads as a self contained narrative focusing on an aspect of her life from her teenage years to her early 40s. The events are out of sequence and her life story comes into focus as the chapters unfold. This is not so much a book with a story as an excellent character study. I found myself really drawn into Andrea's life, and her perspective on her family and friends. There are a few particularly moving chapters involving her mother and father. What I liked best about All Grown Up is that Attenberg hits the perfect emotional tone -- no sentimentality or melodrama, but rather an eerie feel of real emotionality. Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy.

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What a fun read this was! I can't say I've ever read anything like this, it's interesting, fast paced, awkward and above all...funny! Loved it, I am going to try and get my hands on Jami Attenberg's other novels now.

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I wasn't sure what to expect from this book. I knew that I would like it--anyone who has heard of Jami Attenberg before knows that her writing is like a much needed thump on the back when you're choking. This book was also served up with a heavy dose of reality--about art, about love, about jobs, pretty much anything that falls under the large umbrella of "adulting." You can be a grown up and still be in the midst of figuring things out. You can be a grown up and not have 2.5 kids, a husband you might despise and a job that's succeeded in only paying off half your combined debt. You can be an adult and still be slightly miserable. So, instead of feeling more dread while reading this book as I had initially anticipated, i actually felt a sense of relief. I loved the hopeful undertones, the goodness that Andrea displayed, her hope that she could resume her art. My one pet peeve was that it almost felt like we as readers weren't trusted to remember what was going on in her life. Every time a new vignette was shared, we were reintroduced to characters as if we hadn't been eagerly reading along. I loved that this book was short (again it felt like a good slap on the back). It was a great read and one I will be encouraging many to read at the library and on social media. Thanks for the chance to read!

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We all grow up, but we have in us all the children, teen-agers, young adults that we ever were. “All Grown Up”, by Jami Attenberg is a tender account of a woman growing to adulthood in New York City, and a clear-eyed reflection on all of the women she has been along the way.

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I enjoyed reading this book, liked its sharp tone, city setting, difficult narrator and the overlapping chapters. I think the format of the book was its best feature, with chapters examining cross-sections of time and exploring varying themes. Oddly, I can't remember much about the narrator a month after reading the book, though the empathy I felt for her family is still present.
If you enjoy reading shorter writing and magazine format articles this is a great novel for you. Not chick lit, but about the slow changes of character and accretion of relationships that come with age.

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I personally had mixed feelings about the book, because it takes some time to enter the mood and the spirit, but if you take some time to think about everything after finishing the book, the first opinion might change. It is a pleasant, quality and thoughtful lecture that challenges stereotypes, especially literary ones.
The character is an anti-hero and there is no happy ending. Andrea doesn't give up her boring life and job to start doing art and there is no relationship to fix. It is like how life can be, without any embelishments and great expectations. An interesting writing, not pretentious but not simplistic either.

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I loved this book but I can understand why it wouldn't be for everyone. If you've ever been at a point in your life when everyone else is getting married and having children and you don't want to follow that path, this is a story you can relate to. It's very internal and to me, it rang true. The voice of Andrea is so well developed, the book almost felt like a memoir. It raised relevant questions about what society expects of women and how we are labeled when we don't fit into neat categories. Sadly, I missed Jami Attenberg when she was in my city for this book tour. I hope she'll come back. I look forward to reading more from her.

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Thanks to Netgalley for my ARC. I don't think I'll be able to get this book out of my mind for sometime. As a 40 year old, it really touched on some emotions and feelings that I've had. I had to keep reminding myself this was not a memoir, it read that well.

As a single woman in her late 30's, early 40's, you think of things differently. You view friendships, family relationships, works differently. This book tackles all the questions that women face. Sometimes you act like an adult, other times you feel lonely, abandoned.

I really enjoyed this book. I couldn't put it down!

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Andrea gave up her career as an artist to work for an advertising company. Now in her late thirties, Andrea hates her job, she drinks a lot, she has sex with men she ends up hating, and she has a strange relationship with her mother. As people around her seem to find happiness and success, Andrea still doesn’t know what she wants in her life.
The story alternates between the past and the present as Andrea revisits the events that affected her life: the death of her drug-addicted father when she was a teenager; her relationship with her brother, her sister-in-law, and her mother; her relationship with men, but also her relationship with art which she gave up because she couldn’t see a future in it. Sharp, honest, and humorous, this is a novel about family, love, friendship and finding a purpose in life. An emotional journey of a woman as she struggles to find her own identity and to release her dreams.

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Easy to read, it is more a series of vignettes rather than a linear tale. It is refreshing that the protagonist Andrea is not a hero and has very few likeable character traits. It is this, however, that makes the character a compelling read. Throughout it all is her yearning for approval by her mother, brother and sister-in-law without actually engaging in their lives.

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All Grown Up by Jami Attenberg

3 stars

A Peter Pan story

Andrea is a thirty-eight year old single woman living in New York; she always wanted to be an artist, but gave that up and settled for a job in advertising which she claims she hates. She has no real relationship due to her casual and poor choices relating to men; consequently, she is promiscuous and flirts with banned substances.

NIn contrast, Andrea's brother David and his wife Greta have had adulthood thrust upon them by the birth of their severely disabled daughter, Sigrid. Whilst Andrea cares about the family she considers it sufficient to telephone once a week, and rarely visits – she is oblivious to the hurt she causes by not engaging. Her relationship with her mother is generally good although her mother would like her to grow up and settle down. Her father is dead, having died of a drug overdose.

Parts of this book are really easy to relate to, especially if you are one of those people who sit outside of traditional 'norms'; you don't want a long-term relationship, your body clock is not ticking and no, you don't want to hold the baby. Andrea remains a sympathetic character despite her flaws, she just doesn't fit into society's stereotypes.

Sooner or later we all have to grow up and take responsibility for our actions and of course Andrea is no exception, but it takes tragic circumstances for her to step up.

An enjoyable 'Summer read'.

Pashtpaws

Breakaway Reviewers received a copy of the book to review.

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This is almost perfect , i loved The Middlesteins and this is better.

This almost feels like Less Than Zero it feels that it embodies a time and the people that inhabit it .

The characterisation is incredible , the characters live and the prose makes you feel that everything is predetermined , the relationships the reactions seem appropriate and accurate .

I loved this and i am a man and i accept that this is more of a female intended novel

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“All Grown Up” is a witty and intelligent novel following the life of 39-year-old Andrea. The book is incredibly sharp and manages to isolate the main character despite people constantly buzzing around her with problems and ever changing demands. The novels best moments come between Andrea and her mother. Their relationship is incredibly deep and as her mother moves to be closer to her son, who has a terminally ill child, her demands and needs shine out which desperately exposes Andrea, and creates some truly excellent moments in the novel. The book contrasts that perfectly with people who pass by fleetingly, be it men staying overnight or friends who are just to busy. Intimacy for me is the novels key theme and her attachment to people and the world around her. It’s a short novel but one to devour.

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