From the Moon I Watched Her

From the Moon I Watched Her by Emily English Medley is a novel from the perspective of a young girl and the events that happen while she matures into an adult. A concerning and deeply troubling account for actions made against her and those she loves. The emptiness and emotional trauma that resulted and the haunting memories that will be forever with her. A must read for those who love anything psychological or involving mental illness.

I received this from Netgalley.com.

"The Walters are a good, churchgoing family who stand for holiness, purity, grace, and Christian love. Except when they don't."

Wow. An extreme example of 'do what I say, not as I do'. This is one of those stories that can be hard to read because of the abusive nature of some people. But setting that aside, this is a well written and interesting read. Having grown up in an extremely legalistic church (cult), pieces of this story resonated very deeply with me and I know won't forget this book. Put this one on your 2021 TBR list.

4.25☆

I requested this book because of the description. I grew up in a similar very religious household where everything was ran by what the church did and said- no questions asked so I am always intrigued when books are written about childhoods like that.

The story is centered around Stephanie who is bound by the church and the the mental illness of her mother. Her entire environment is troubling and difficult. Much more difficult than I had to endure and Stephanie is naïve- she doesn't know what's happening and the reader wants to reach out and shake her.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book and I think those that had similar environments will relate and like it. Those that didn't may find it difficult to read at times but its worth the read. The author does a great job creating the characters.

Thanks to Netgalley for my advanced ebook copy.

Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an advanced copy.

From the Moon I Watched Her is a deeply unsettling, troubled story that's told well. Stephanie, bound by the culture of ultra-religiousness and warped by the mental illness of her mother, undergoes abuse, neglect, shame, and guilt, without understanding fully how troubling her environment is. It's a hard novel to read because of the abuses that happen to Stephanie and how they are described from her innocent point of view. She doesn't know enough to know what's happening is wrong, but the reader knows. That effect seems to be a major lens on the entire novel. Some people may want to skip this book or those few pages that tell about the events because these events are horrible. I was able to skim/skip over those pages and still understand the story. I would have liked to see more justice come for her by the end of the story. It's like she's okay with sweeping the worst thing under the rug and not seeking accountability from the perpetrator, even though it allows the continuation of the blind system that wronged her.
I grew up in similar Evangelical church environments, and so much of that part of the story resonated with me. A childish love growing to adulthood mistrust. The blindness to wrongs committed by church members. Much of the Church of Christ culture is represented honestly. Everything in the story is shaped by the culture produced by hard-core evangelism, good or bad.
Most of the characters seemed to remain mysteries once the story was done, but Stephanie and her mother were the only ones I wanted to understand. I wanted Stephanie to have her happy ending. Reading about her as she grows up, seeing her vulnerable POV, it made me feel protective of her.
Overall, FtMIWH is a well-written, troubling story that hit home and made me care about the main character.

This book contains very testy subjects, which I knew going in.
It mentions in the description that it will discuss abortion, but mental health, and physical, emotional, sexual, and spiritual abuse are also discussed.
It was interesting to get a child’s perspective on a subject as divisive as abortion. Especially since when we begin, that child is only 5 years old.
We also get her perspectives on other subjects, such as abuse of all kinds and mental illness.
This was a hard one to read because a 5/8/10 year old doesn’t necessarily know what these look like or what it is and so their perspective is innocent. It also make everything all the more vulnerable, because a child doesn’t always know that all these things they are discussing are so awful.
This also shined a light on a type of abuse that isn’t portrayed as often as sexual, emotional, or physical (though it shows those too and those are as equally valid). It shows the damage that can be done with spiritual abuse. You can see the effects of spiritual abuse in the beginning when Stephanie is only 5 and is talking about all the different things you can do it be sent to hell.
She grows up throughout the book and her perspectives changes, but it never got any less difficult to read.
This shows how hypocritical some religions can be, and it’s infuriating.
I found that even with all the rough content, I enjoyed this book.
I thought it was very well written, and though is touched on tricky subjects, I thought it was done with grace.

This book was a little hard to read in parts because of some of things that happened to the main character from a young age. Her family is the member of a cult church chock full of hypocrisy and her mother is dealing with her own past and struggling with a mental illness. Her family is torn in half and she is truly her mother's daughter in many ways. Stephanie turns to unhealthy outlets and seeks approval in a world where she is just left to fend for herself. I found the writing style to be somewhat lyrical and thought the main character was written intensely with a great deal of pain resonating. This is the first I have read from this author and thought it was well written although content was often difficult. Thanks for the ARC, NetGalley.

I recieved this free of charge from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review

From The Moon I Watched Her was probably one of the saddest books i've read in a long time. Set against the backdrop of an evangelical church, Stephanie tries to navigate a landscape she is much too young and much too naive to understand.

Each character is deeply flawed in their own way and the truth of who they are is slow go unravel. You're never quite sure what the truth is until about 80% of the way through the book. The author wove each plot intricately and didn't patronize the reader.

I got annoyed with the sheer volume of preaching throughout the novel. The scenes could've been much shorter and still had the same effect. Also I dont appreciate being preached to about religious through characters.

Overall, definitely deserving of a 4* rating. I couldn't put this down.

Stephanie Walters is six-years-old when she first hears her grandfather debate on the topic of abortion. Standing in the pews, enamored with her family’s patriarch, Stephanie would never fathom the abuse his ideals could wield and the destruction it could have on her family.

We watch Stephanie come of age amidst this destruction. Our heart breaks for her as she wrestles the claustrophobia of oppressive ideals & and the emotional abuse of a mother with her own repressed traumas. As she grows, she contends with her own mixed feelings about religion and science, love and hate, lies and truth. She is ultimately forced to reckon with a life of psychological manipulation in order to make peace with herself and her family.

The powerful thing about this novel is how easily it could’ve fallen to cliches, and how precise Medley was in her ability to prevent that. When I walked into the novel, I was expecting an overtly political storyline about a 1970s Southern Christian church and its campaign against abortion. What I received was a thoughtful, if not challenging, story about family dynamics- particularly, the mother/daughter relationship- and the devastating effects of cyclical family trauma. There are some big moments that I felt were rushed into for dramatic effect and then glossed over, but the crux of this story lies in the relationship between Stephanie and her mother, which I though was beautifully developed. I did struggle with the depictions of emotional and sexual abuse, though I felt Medley was careful in her treatment of these sensitive topics. Still, this was my own reading experience, and I would strongly encourage others to consider their ability to handle scenes depicting rape and an aggressive, forced abortion, respectively, before picking this one up.

Overall, I really liked this book. It’s structured into three parts, each with a handful of chapters, and this format made it easy to read quickly despite the whopping 647 pages. I’d like to thank Net Galley and the publisher for giving me the opportunity to read this advanced ebook edition!

A very compelling coming of age story that explores religion, family relationships, and what it means to truly love. The emotion of this story sweeps you up.

I received an advanced copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. This review itself does not contain spoilers or content warnings. For those who consider CW/TW to be spoilers they are listed for the book at the end of the review (so stop reading here if you don’t want to see them!)

I’m still trying to come to terms with how I feel about this book. It’s DARK. It’s HEAVY. It’s definitely a book that requires a specific headspace to read because of the content matter.

I liked how the narration becomes more complex as the main character, Stephanie, grows older. I also liked a lot of the descriptions of her headspace particularly about the more traumatic and emotional events.

I’m finding it hard to articulate what didn’t sit right with me...It’s hard to parse whether I’m uneasy about the book because of the content or because of issues I have with the writing style and literary choices. At this moment I’m sitting at about a 3.65 but rounding up to four.

MAJOR CW/TW: abortion, incest, molestation, rape, sexual assault, sexual assault of a minor, pedophilia, suicide, drug use, psychosis, psychotic episodes, arson, religious themes, religious upbringing, evangelism

"From the Moon I Watched Her" is an achingly beautiful story of family love and loss, right from page one. Set in the suburbs of southeast Texas, we are immediately introduced to Stephanie and her life in the legalistic, almost cult-like, religion she has been raised in. I found myself endeared to her character, so much so that even when she made questionable choices, I still wanted to protect her and root for her to find her place in the world. "From the Moon I Watched Her" is meant to make you uncomfortable, and to question everything you've been told so far, and that's ok. It's part of what really sets this book apart for me. I would recommend it to anyone, and it is definitely on my reread list.

Thank you Netgalley and Greenleaf Book Group for the eARC!

Reminds me of Room as it’s narrated and written in a child like way for the first few chapters when Stephanie is 5 years old

Really dark and heavy story about coming of age and how abuse affects children, and watching Stephanie process her trauma as she gets older.

Really difficult to read due to the content but I did like the writing style and how it became more complex as Stephanie grew up

Takes an interesting look at grow up in a home with toxic parents, one of whom struggles with mental illness, and extreme religious teachings

Difficult to put into words how I feel about the book as it is so dark and emotional. It was an interesting story though and I enjoyed it as much as you can enjoy such a heavy topic.
4.5 ⭐️

Told from the perspective of a young girl, this novel takes on mental illness, rape, homelessness, and religious abuse. Medley deftly channels a child’s desire for attention, confusion about conflicting views, and willingness to submit to parental demands, creating a narrator for whom the world is a terrifying kaleidoscope, never stable and rarely predictable. The trauma the novel presents and the inability or unwillingness of its adult characters to address it ring true, particularly given the setting of suburbia in the late 1970s. Ready for book clubs and discussion groups, this should be a very successful book.

We follow the story of Stephanie and her super religious family, from childhood (at age 6) to her being 17.
The book is written in three parts and the first one is the one with the most religion in it.
Now, I didn’t love the book. I’m not even sure I liked it.
There were a lot of troublesome issues (in the first part) which made me pretty uncomfortable. And then we get some answers in the third part, but overall it was all so confusing and half the time I didn’t know what I was reading. Some things got solved rather quickly and without depth.
Also, I think that Stephanie's voice at six was almost the same throughout the book ad only changed when she was 17.

Stephanie is born into a conservative Christian household; her grandfather Daddy Black is the church's preacher. Her parents don't get along well, and Stephanie finds herself in many troublesome situations during this coming of age story. This is a very heavy book covering topics like rape, incest, mental illness, and bigotry, which we see through Stephanie's eyes. There were times when I could not turn away from the story and the writing but just as many times where it was almost too much to handle. This book reminded me of Betty, another very dark coming of age story. 3.5 stars.

Thank you to Greenleaf Book Group Press for providing an ARC on NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

From the Moon I Watched Her is a compelling and incredibly poignant exposé on the dangers of oppressive religion and family secrets. Emily English Medley tells the story of Stephanie Walters who grows up in a Church of Christ in small-town Texas. Haunted by the sins of her parents and sister, Katherine, Stephanie must decide what and who exactly she believes as she sifts through her unraveling world. Medley's writing expertly gives the reader a look into Stephanie's mind from a very young child through her late teen years. Throughout this book I felt as if Stephanie was a friend of mine that I desperately wanted to help and I was sad to end my time with her. TW: sexual abuse, child abuse, abortion

Fast paced book and I really enjoyed it. Good story line and I think people are gonna love it. I would definitely read again and recommend

Even though this book is heavy and difficult to read it is one of the best I have ever read. The author has done a fabulous job taking on the subject matter in this story. Stephanie is the main character and she is only five years old at the beginning and is being brought up in a deeply religious environment. Her mother is mentally ill and dealing with issues of her own and Stephanie really has no where to turn for the guidance she so sorely needs. The hipocrasy of the characters in the church and her family are so very confusing and especially for a young, naive girl.. This is a very emotional read but I highly recommend it. I almost never read a book a second time but I will definitely read this one again.

Thanks for the ARC Met Galley.

CW: abortion, religion, religious upbringing, sexual content, pedophilia and sexual trauma, drug use, arson, mental illness, death.

I want to thank Greenleaf Book Group Press for the digital NetGalley copy of From The Moon I Watched Her by Emily English Medley in exchange for an honest review.

This book is raw, heartbreaking, and real. The reader sees this coming-of-age from the eyes of a small town Texas girl, including the expectations of her church and the broken dynamic of her family. Stephanie struggles to find truth and develop identity among a cast of unreliable family full of secrets. The author’s depiction of the innocence taken from someone so vulnerable and the trauma ensued is haunting.

I have recently discovered how much I love historical fiction, and the Houston setting (with travels to both Arkansas and Galveston) is particularly impactful and relatable to me. Anyone who grew up around mental illness will find validation and feel seen in this account. My sincere hope is that you don’t relate to several aspects of the story, but I know that many will. I can see this book being read and discussed in college classrooms.

For books with difficult and traumatic themes, it’s hard to say “I love this book”, but it is more appropriate in this instance for me to say “this book means something to me.” My original read was the digital copy as my last read of 2020, but after completion I reached out to the author to buy this signed physical copy. Emily was very kind to me, and I thank her for writing this book. 5/5⭐️

From The Moon I Watched her was an interesting novel about how our traumas can either make or break us. Stephanie grows up in a super religious cult like church, but behind the closed doors at home it is a different story. Her mother is suffering from a serious mental illness and she is constantly whispering little secrets in Stephanie’s ear. Stephanie, a child who only wants her mothers love believes everything her mother tells her..why would her mother lie to her? As she gets older and her mother’s stories get crazier and suddenly aren’t even the same stories, Stephanie starts to question everything. Is her family everything she thought it was? Will the church be able to save them all? And what exactly happened to Stephanie’s mother that haunts her?

This was definitely an extremely heavy book but it was very well written. I look forward to reading more from this author!

Thank you Net-Galley for the chance to read this book in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you so much for the opportunity to read this book. I'll be posting my review on Goodreads and Amazon

Wow. I have to admit that From the Moon I Watched Her left me a bit speechless. This book was completely heartbreaking. It doesn't reflect organized religion in a positive light. The Walters family is affected by mental illness and the structure of the family has been severely weakened. The main character, Stephanie, is close with her mother which is unfortunate since she is extremely unbalanced. Of course, her father has his own issues as well. The dysfunction of her parents extends to both Stephanie and her sister and impacts their relationship as well. The book shows how life's events lead to rifts in people and families that sometimes cannot be repaired or undone.

I felt like anything bad that could happen to Stephanie did. It seemed that nothing positive or good ever happened to her. With every page I turned, I wanted just one good thing to occur. It seemed like the storyline went negative to the "extreme" ...at least in my opinion. That said, the book really was beautifully written. There was some really incredible symbolism and this author is definitely talented. Sadly, it took until the end of the book to finally see a glimmer of hope and it was after a ton of negative events happened to Stephanie. I, personally, would have liked to see a little more positivity. However, I realize that's my personal opinion.

Thank you to NetGalley for this ARC. I voluntarily chose to review this book and the opinions contained within are my own.

This book was a heavy, difficult read. I want to preface this review with a very strong content warning. This book will not be for everyone. Make sure to read the content warning before you decide if this is for you if you have sensitivities or triggers when reading.

Stephanie is our narrator and the main character in this book. We follow her as she ages, but her first narrative is at five-years-old. We find out that Stephanie’s father is the local preacher, extremely against the act of abortion, and yet, we soon discover that inside the preacher’s home and private life, things are disgusting, ugly, and awful.

Medley’s writing is amazing. The writing creates such emotion, good and bad, you can’t help but be impressed. It’s an all-consuming read that I could not walk away from.

I don’t think it’s possible for me to say that this was a book I loved. The tragic and horrifying events in the book make it hard to say that, however, this is a book that impacted me and I won’t easily forget.

Content Warnings:
Abortion, very religious tones, mental illness, father/daughter sexual relationship, sexual relationship between young girl and boys, animal abuse, adultery

I was provided a gifted copy of this book for free. I am leaving my review voluntarily.

No punches were pulled! Definitely a tough read for people recovering from religious abuse, but beautifully written.

From the Moon I Watched Her is an intriguing, yet incredibly difficult read due to several content areas including sexual abuse, rape, child abuse, church abuse, arson and drug use. Despite the subject matter, it is sometimes important to read stories that are difficult to understand the struggles we haven't experienced ourselves.

From the moon I Watched Her is absolutely gut wrenching.

Family drama, extreme religion, abuse and tragedy are at the forefront of this story. This is a hard read, and difficult to discuss without giving too much away. The writing is flawless and trust me, it's hard to look away. It is a coming-of-age story, but one unlike any other I have read.

A stunning read that will leave you speechless, however, it is heavy and there are a lot of triggers, so anyone unsure please check before hand.

Such an excellent exploration of religion in the context of 1970s America. The praise around this novel is greatly deserved as its writing style and subject matter have yet to be paralleled by a new release this year.

This was a tough read at times, but oh so good. This main character is so relatable even through her unique home situation I feel her pain and struggles. I read this in spurts while my children played at the park and many days we over-spent our time there so I could get in just one more chapter. I couldn't wait for it to end then I was sad when it did. What a gem!

this was a really well done book, it had so much emotion and I really felt for Stephanie. The author was able to weave a beautiful story and I enjoyed reading every part of it.