In his wonderfully down-to-earth, transparent style, Steve Cuss has given us another gift in The Expectation Gap. This is the most helpful book I’ve read in my thirty-five years of ministry when it comes to recognizing, naming, and bridging the gap between what we believe about God and what we experience from God. Steve has given us practical tools to identify deeply held patterns, beliefs, and habits that hold us back from truly encountering God, inspiring us to do the work so we can experience the fullness of love, joy, and peace that is ours in Christ.

CHRISTINE CAINE, founder of A21 and Propel Women

If you’ve ever felt like there’s more to explore in your relationship with God, you’re probably correct. In these pages, Steve Cuss, a trusted guide for many leaders, reveals the missing pieces you’ve been searching for.

CAREY NIEUWHOF, bestselling author of At Your Best, podcaster, and founder of the Art of Leadership Academy

Steve Cuss’s new book is a welcome addition to the literature that applies systems theory to everyday life and growth. I found myself laughing and being pierced with truth—all at the same time as I read this fresh, practical, and playful book. If you seek to understand these important concepts while using the tools Steve offers, I have no doubt you will experience growth, transformation, and a new freedom you may have never thought possible.

RUTH HALEY BARTON, author of Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership and founder of Transforming Center

Steve Cuss has a remarkable ability to meet us right where we’re stuck and point the way to freedom. The Expectation Gap will be immensely helpful for anyone longing to experience God more fully and seeking to become aware of major obstacles along the path.

CHUCK DEGROAT, author of When Narcissism Comes to Church, and professor of pastoral care at Western Theological Seminary, Holland, Michigan

Steve Cuss is a reliable guide and a trustworthy friend who has helped me navigate the relational dynamics of life and leadership. Now he takes the conversation to the deepest level by focusing on our relationship with God and its connection to our relationship with ourselves and with others. By means of astute diagnostics and precise tools, Cuss helps us name and close the gaps in our experience of God. The result is a beautiful journey to the heart’s true home—the presence of a loving God.

GLENN PACKIAM, lead pastor, Rockharbor Church, and author of The Resilient Pastor and The Intentional Year

Steve Cuss extends a hand to those of us navigating the sometimes- bewildering journey of faith, where the realities of God’s presence and love often seem distant. Through his candid sharing of personal struggles and the breakthroughs that transformed his pastoral ministry, Steve offers not just empathy but practical tools to bridge the gap between our intellectual beliefs and our heart’s experience. His insights challenge the often-unspoken norms within our faith communities, encouraging a journey toward a more authen- tic, tangible relationship with God. As a fellow traveler on this journey, I believe The Expectation Gap will be a beacon of hope for many, illuminating a path to experiencing the peace, freedom, and love promised in Christ.

TARA BETH LEACH, pastor and author of Emboldened

We wouldn’t be exaggerating to say that no author has shaped our leadership more than Steve Cuss in the last several years. Steve is speaking to a fundamental challenge that most Christians face but are rarely honest about—the distance between what we profess to be true about God and our actual experience of those truths. With his trademark, straight-to-the point clarity, he illuminates hidden dynamics that stunt our personal growth, which is why we regularly tell our friends, family, and peers, “If you aren’t reading Steve Cuss, you should be.”

IKE AND SHARON MILLER, PhDs, authors and pastors of Bright City Church in Durham, North Carolina

Too often our daily experience doesn’t live up to the miraculous, life- changing, world-shaking faith we see in Scripture, and so we feel far from God. Steve Cuss reveals how our experience of God can be derailed by our own baggage, narratives, and expectations and offers honest, practical tools to imagine the possibility that God has gone nowhere. Thank you, Steve, for helping us get out of our own way . . . and God’s.

MANDY SMITH, pastor and author of The Vulnerable Pastor

For many Christians, the difference between their personal beliefs about God, themselves, and the world, and their lived experiences is a chasm difficult to face, but Steve Cuss is the gentle and affirming voice that speaks to the unhealthy expectations that rise out of our culture, communities, and preconceived ideas about the way we think things should be. He doesn’t seek to fill the gap, but instead honors and nurtures it so we can see that it is not the God of our beliefs who has failed us. It is the thing we have not yet noticed—that God is standing on the precipice with us and staring down that same abyss.

PHUC LUU, PhD, author of Jesus of the East

Most of us were taught somewhere along the way the idea that Christianity is not a religion, but a relationship. But what if my relationship with God has not turned out the way I expected? John Calvin taught that all “true and sound wisdom” comes at the intersection of “the knowledge of God and the knowledge of self.” The Expectation Gap helps us understand how to grow in this true wisdom. Steve compellingly challenges clichés about God and relationships and what it means to be in a growing relationship with God. If you’re open to taking an honest look at yourself, this book will surely encourage you.

TOD BOLSINGER, cofounder and principal of AE Sloan Leadership and author of Tempered Resilience

The Expectation Gap is a must-read for anyone who has a desire to deepen their connection to God. Steve has been a close friend for more than fifteen years, and his spiritual journey has been inspiring and encouraging for me. I have often struggled to reconcile my own experiences with my expectations of God. Steve’s teachings have got- ten me get unstuck and moving in a new and exciting direction. This book is an antidote for spiritual drift, and I’m confident it will help you experience God in new and fresh ways.

DAVE RUNYON, coauthor of The Art of Neighboring

It has been my great privilege to work closely with Steve Cuss for more than a decade now. I’ve watched him expand, refine, and clarify these tools into a way of life that can be grasped and implemented by anyone who wants to be well. His humor, boldness, and faith in Jesus make him an excellent guide on the journey to experience God more often in our daily lives. This book represents his best thinking to date and is a wonderful invitation to encounter the goodness of God more fully.

JIMMY CARNES, coach with Capable Life and Steve’s colleague

In The Expectation Gap, my friend, pastor, coworker, and mentor Steve Cuss helps us poke at some nagging questions about faith. Steve provides a revolutionary framework to think through our own expectations of God—and his insights do not disappoint. He applies the elements of family systems theory—by asking inquisitive questions and identifying stuck patterns—to shed light on these gaps. He also provides practical insight into human- sized practices we can use to bridge them. This is accessible theology for an accessible God. Through these pages we see the gospel again as God intended—as good news!

TOM MORRIS, elder and friend of Steve

An absolute necessity for your transformational tool box. With wit and wisdom forged through his own life and workplace experience, Steve Cuss offers true power tools that move far beyond information and deliver on the change we all long for. Combined with the grace of the Spirit of God and the courage to apply the teaching, Steve’s teaching will ease you into the goodness of the gifts God offers, and the gap between what you know and what you feel about God’s love will seem much smaller as change comes.

LINNEA SPICER, elder and Steve’s colleague

Steve takes readers into a deeper understanding of how chronic anxiety infects our discernment and experience of God’s deep and abiding love. He doesn’t leave us with just a better understanding, but instead asks provocative questions and provides concrete tools to explore the gap between our theological beliefs and experiences of God. Join the journey toward relaxing into the presence of God as the beloved.

RENAE LORING, pastor, spiritual director, and Steve’s colleague