The Handmaid's Tale meets Kill Bill...but make it a fantasy book!

A hundred-and-fifty years ago, the women of Draconia were stripped of their magic. Since then, every girl who comes of age in the kingdom has been given a choice: have kids or become a gladiator.

Eleanor Skinner chose gladiator, and at 35, she's now the oldest undefeated gladiator in the history of Draconia. She's wealthy, she's notorious, and overall, she's pretty happy being a child-free lady-killer, thank you very much.

Then a one-night stand leaves her knocked up.

Eleanor would literally rather be decapitated in the arena than have to raise a child. Unfortunately, she gets no say in the matter. So when she hears about a witch who lives outside the kingdom and might still have her power, Eleanor and her best friend Rosalind embark on a quest to find her and end the pregnancy with magic.

But the journey takes an unexpected turn, bringing Eleanor face-to-face with old flames, new friends, and secrets about Draconia that would make any self-respecting feminist want to stand up, pick up a sword, and use it to slaughter the patriarchy.

This is a found family tale of female friendship, trans rights, immigration, and putting a sword up the president's butt. It uses humor to engage with sensitive topics, and directly satirizes the US administration under Donald Trump. The enemies-to-lovers romantic subplot is secondary to the plot and politics, but the banter is second to none. Perfect for fans of Margaret Atwood, Terry Pratchett and Quentin Tarantino.

Content warning: deals directly with trans rights, the US government's current approach to immigration, racism, infertility, and a woman's right to choose. Very strong language. Very dark humor. Gore. There is NO birth or pregnancy termination actually in the book. MC experiences mild first trimester symptoms.