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Lost Souls

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Pub Date Jul 28 2026 | Archive Date Sep 11 2026


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Description

How could the scuzziest man in the world and the kindest woman alive ever fall in love?

Arnie Garth has it all. An LA porn empire, a gorgeous pornstar mistress and a legendary wife. Unfortunately, he has the morals of a sewer rat. And when he finds himself on his premature deathbed, he receives some unexpected news: he has no soul.

According to the Keeper of Souls, he was born without one. A heavenly clerical error. His was mistakenly given to the baby girl behind him in the queue – a sweet, selfless Englishwoman named Noreen Milburn, who now has two.

To avoid a fate worse than death, Arnie has just one week to find Noreen, fall genuinely in love with her, and make her fall for him too. No explanations. No shortcuts. Just real love. The problem? Noreen is a sheep-loving Lake District shepherdess who prefers charity work to men, while Arnie’s world is full of porn stars, a furious wife and a hired hitman.

The route to true love runs from LA to Cumbria to Las Vegas. But will it find its way home?

How could the scuzziest man in the world and the kindest woman alive ever fall in love?

Arnie Garth has it all. An LA porn empire, a gorgeous pornstar mistress and a legendary wife. Unfortunately, he...


A Note From the Publisher

Paul A. Mendelson is a BAFTA-nominated screenwriter and novelist. He created some of BBC’s most successful sit-coms, shown in the US and over 70 countries, and acclaimed British drama. He now writes screenplays and novels, for adults and middle-grade. Paul scripts his novels, three have been optioned for movies, including his latest ‘Seville’. His novel Must Have GSOH was the only UK Finalist in the 2023 Screencraft LA Cinematic Book Contest.

Paul A. Mendelson is a BAFTA-nominated screenwriter and novelist. He created some of BBC’s most successful sit-coms, shown in the US and over 70 countries, and acclaimed British drama. He now writes...


Available Editions

EDITION Ebook
ISBN 9781835745960
PRICE £3.99 (GBP)
PAGES 288

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Average rating from 14 members


Featured Reviews

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Lost Souls by Paul A. Mendelson is an imaginative and heartfelt novel that blends humor, romance, and the supernatural into a story that's both entertaining and surprisingly thought-provoking. The premise is delightfully original: a ruthless and morally bankrupt man discovers he was born without a soul due to a celestial clerical error. To avoid a terrible fate after death, he must find the woman who unknowingly received his missing soul and convince her to genuinely fall in love with him all within a single week. I really enjoyed how the romance developed in an engaging way, avoiding the predictable path one might expect from such an unconventional setup. Overall, Lost Souls was a fresh, funny, and imaginative novel that combined romance, humor, and fantasy into a memorable tale about redemption, love, and discovering what it truly means to have a soul.

I received an ARC copy from NetGalley. Thank you for giving me the chance to read this novel and share my honest review of the novel!

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This was a bit of a mess at times, and leaned slightly politically incorrect at other times. But honestly it was a kooky fun read that reminded me of dime store novels in the 70s/80s. No deep plot here. Lots of harebrained schemes and weird innuendo. But charming nonetheless.

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I wasn't completely sold by this book at first, but the story eventually pulled me in, especially thanks to the humour and some brilliant comedic moments involving Ambrose. The pacing did drag in places and felt a little chaotic towards the end, although perhaps that was intentional on the author's part.
The ending though!! That plot twist however I did NOT see coming. Fortunately it definitely saved the last part of the book for me.
Overall, I'd say it's quirky, chaotic at times and definitely a little unhinged, but it was certainly a memorable read! As the plot thickens, the story really comes into its own, making this a book that definitely stands out from the crowd.

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Two very different worlds collide when an adult film producer meets a shepherdess from the Lake District. Thanks to NetGalley and The Book Guild for the ARC; This review is voluntary. T
The opening scenes are gritty, with main characters who are equally unsavoury—one morally, the other physically. Stick with it though; this is a highly original and rather brave book, sprinkled with some genuinely funny moments. More could have been developed with Noreen—her innocence makes her a bit bland, and even as she ventures into the wider world, we don’t get enough insight into her thoughts. The writing style is somewhat hectic, perhaps intentionally so. The ending is clever and wraps up the story nicely.
This is one for readers in the right mood to embrace a quirky tale starring a cast of oddballs in zany settings.

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Summary: Arnie is an erotic film producer who isn’t exactly known for his kindness or shining personality. After suffering from a major medical event he wakes up in the hospital to Ambrose who is there to collect his soul. Only, small problem, Arnie doesn’t have a soul. Thanks to a mix up when he was born a woman named Noreen has his soul in addition to her own and the only way to get his back is to fall in love with Noreen and for her to love him back.

Read if you like:
-unconventional fiction
-humor/satire
-unique and fresh storylines

My thoughts:
I liked this. I wasn’t sure that I was going to when I started it but I’m glad I pushed through. Arnie was unlikeable but that was the point and I started to root for him as the book progressed -which was also the point. The ending was surprising and wrapped up nicely. The writing itself was easy to read, the characters were well developed. This book was weird -but good weird. This was a 3.75 for me -rounded up to a 4. Thank you to The Book Guild and NetGalley for the advanced e-copy in exchange for my honest thoughts.

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Sad to see the only review so far is a 2* one! I’ll give it a solid 4.5* just for the humour! I respect the author as I’ve seen lots of his TV work and can absolutely see what he was doing with Lost Souls. Polar opposite worlds collide and I’ve already picked the actors I want to star in the TV production. Loved this and would happily read a follow up to see what Arnie and Noreen get up to!

Thank you to Netgalley, the publisher and the author for the ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review.

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Such an unusual, funny and heartwarming story. I throughly enjoyed reading this tale! What a hoot! Thank you so much!

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BLOG TOUR REVIEW

Review for 'Lost Souls' by Paul A. Mendelson

Where the heck have you been hiding all my life Paul !!! I absolutely Love, LOVE, LOVED this absolutely beautiful page turner!! It was just absolutely gorgeous and I was hooked from the very first page to the last!! An absolute must read!!! This may be the first book I have read by this author but it most definitely won't be my last!!

I am shocked I have not read any of your other books before now and am just so glad I have rectified that. I cannot wait to see what your previous and future books bring me!!

This book has absolutely stunning and evocative descriptions that set you straight in the scenes. The cover, title and synopsis suit the storyline perfectly and I am ABSOLUTELY devastated to come to the end of this book and leave Arnie, Noreen, the Lake District, Las Vegas and LA behind

OMG!!! I cannot wait to get stuck in to all of Paul's previous and future books!! They are just guaranteed to be stunning even if they are only half as gorgeous as this beauty!! I absolutely adored the gorgeous heart-warming and feel good storyline.

This book is beautifully written and completely absorbs you in the stunning atmosphere of the Lake District, the madness of Las Vegas and completely sucking you in with the vivid descriptions leaving you hearing the sheep, smelling the Lake District air, falling in love with the characters and feeling the tears of laughter streaming down your face at the turn of each page. The synopsis and cover suits the storyline perfectly.

AN ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS, UNIQUE, FANTASTIC AND BIZARRE MUST READ WITH A TWIST YOU WILL NEVER SEE COMING!!

THIS IS THE PERFECT BOOK TO TURN ANY FROWN UPSIDE DOWN! ABSOLUTELY BLOOMING BRILLIANT!

As you may be able to work out I absolutely LOVE, LOVE, LOVED this captivating, stunning page turner from the very moment I turned the front cover to the very last word and beyond. What a feel good, heart warming, hilarious, unique, turn a frown upside down escapism! I fell in love with Paul's brilliant writing skills and I am so pleased that I have finally discovered his fantastic imaginative books and cannot wait to see what other books he has written especially if they are even just half as fantastic as this one they are still guaranteed to be utterly brilliant! This gorgeous storyline is just absolutely brilliant, imaginative and hilarious as well as easy to read and heart-warming. It is just one of those absolutely epic books that promises that the reader gets completely lost in the pages for hours. I am so glad that I have finally discovered this extremely talented author and really cannot wait to get stuck in to the rest of his books. If they are only half as addictive and heart warming as this one they are guaranteed to be completely compelling and addictive!! Paul really does transport his readers from their reading spots to the Lake District, Las Vegas and LA where they will discover the chauvinistic pig and scuzzy Arnie and the absolute heart of gold animal loving Noreen. Paul's brilliant descriptions made me feel like I was with them myself from the moment I met them until the very end. really did absolutely fell in love with everything about this brilliant book. It is a fabulous story ram packed with an unreliable narrator, a guy you will love to hate, a woman you will love to love, sheep, a devil, a ferret, a vertically challenged hitman, a malicious wife, the porn industry, fabulous locations, drama, humour, adventure, fun, lies, laughter, secrets, bizarreness and absolutely everything you could ask for and so much more!! It really does tick every single box in everything you could want in an absolutely hilarious MUST READ!! I am not going to go into the storyline as it is one of those books you truly need to read yourself as nothing I say can justify how fantastic it is. The publisher has also done an incredible job of telling you what you need to know in the synopsis. Therefore, if you want to know more then you will just have to grab a copy for yourself! I can promise that you will not regret it and you may even discover a new favourite author just like I have! You can thank me later! I must say I absolutely LOVED the twist at the end which I really was not expecting!! After reading hundreds and hundreds of books it is getting more and more difficult to surprise me, especially when it comes to books like this as they tend to be quite predictable, but Paul managed it hook, line and sinker!! Well done Paul. This truly is a completely brilliant, unique masterpiece that I truly would recommend to absolutely anyone and everyone, especially anyone who needs cheering up! You do need to grab the tissues and clear your schedules as you will NOT be able to put it down and you will end up with tears streaming down your face from laughing so much!! Be warned, do not read this in public nor while drinking anything! I made this very silly mistake and ended up bursting out with laughter, spitting my drink everywhere and getting some very strange looks while waiting down the doctors surgery while reading it! Paul's wonderful, vivid fantastic immersive writing skills and satire imagination will keep you sucked in from beginning to end. I completely devoured the book in one sitting of several hours while sitting in my garden with the sun on my face . It is one of those beauties where regardless if you are reading it in the sun with a cocktail or curled up next to the fire with a hot chocolate Paul will transport you to the Lake District, LA and Las Vegas being warmed by the laughter and bizarreness.

Pack your bags, get comfortable, clear your schedules and get ready to go on a laughter filled break with Arnie and Noreen in this hilarious read!

You need to book the day off whatever you had planned as once you pick up this book and turn the pages I can guarantee you will not want to put it down!! I found myself picking it up every spare second I had and not wanting to put it down!! AN ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS MUST READ!!

The characters were all unique with their own realistic traits, strengths, flaws, quirks and weaknesses. It was intriguing to watch and I was completely invested in each and every single one of them especially Noreen, maybe not so much Arnie lol! It was absolutely amazing to watch the personalities and friendships between all the characters grow, develop and change. Paul ensures they come to life at every turn of the page and I was sad to leave them when I came to the end and had to say Goodbye. Each and every one of the characters worked perfectly with the storyline and I would love to see this made into a movie!!!

Well done Paul on an absolutely fantastic page turner, I will definitely be looking for your books any time I need a smile on my face!

Overall a unique, brilliant, hilarious and absolute MUST READ!!

#LostSouls #PaulAMendelson #TheBookGuild #ZooLoosBT #ZooloosBookTours

@PaulAMendelson @TheBookGuild @ZooLoosBT @ZooloosBookTours


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Lost Souls is certainly one of the most unusual books I’ve read in quite some time. The story opens with an introduction to Ambrose, a mysterious figure with a rather unusual role, and his perspective immediately sets the tone, giving the novel a fun, entertaining and wonderfully imaginative beginning. Discovering that Arnie has spent his entire life without a soul because of a heavenly clerical error is such an original premise that I couldn’t resist finding out where the story would go from there.
Arnie Garth isn’t an easy character to warm to. Wealthy, loud, self-centred and convinced the world revolves around him, he couldn’t be more different from Noreen Milburn, whose kindness, generosity and love of animals make her much easier to like. Although she’s not especially comfortable around people, her passion for helping others shines through. Bringing these two very different characters together makes for an entertaining and often amusing journey as their worlds unexpectedly collide. For me, Noreen was undoubtedly the heart of the novel. Her compassion and genuine warmth balanced Arnie’s overbearing personality perfectly, and I found myself far more invested in her journey than his. My favourite character, however, was Ambrose. His appearances added some of the book’s funniest and most memorable moments, and every time he appeared I found myself smiling. He brought a welcome sense of warmth and charm to the story.
There are plenty of humorous situations throughout the novel, and I smiled more than once at the increasingly ridiculous circumstances Arnie finds himself in. It’s an incredibly imaginative concept, and when the humour lands it really does raise a smile.
That said, I think this may come down more to my own expectations than anything else. I found myself anticipating a more traditional dynamic between Arnie and Noreen, perhaps with Arnie trying to win her over, and when the story didn’t follow that path I felt a little out of step with it. In hindsight, that isn’t a flaw in the book at all, just a reflection of what I was expecting going in.
I think this ultimately comes down to personal taste. While I appreciated the originality of the story and enjoyed stepping outside my usual reading preferences, the humour and pacing meant I never quite connected with it as much as I’d hoped. That said, I was still happy to read it through to the end, and I can easily see how readers who enjoy quirky, satirical humour would find a lot to enjoy here.
Overall, Lost Souls is a quirky, imaginative and often funny novel built around a genuinely original idea. Although it didn’t quite match my personal reading tastes, I can easily imagine fans of offbeat humour, larger-than-life characters and satirical comedy thoroughly enjoying the journey.

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Did not expect to find the Lake District juxtaposed with USA porn makers, but here we are :)

Great fun, interesting premise, and amusing characters with a heart-warming ending. I would have liked more in the Lake District but that's a personal preference as I grew up not far away.

Our male protagonist wakes up in hospital close to death and is told he doesn't have a soul so can't pass happily into heaven. His was mistakenly placed into an English woman, Noreen, who now has two. The only way to get his back is to fall in love with Noreen and for her to love him back. Hilarity ensues.

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Well, what can I say about this book? I didn't enjoy the first chapter, but I suppose that was to be expected. Knowing in advance that one of the main characters was morally corrupt and thoroughly unpleasant, the author needed to set the scene.

Thankfully, I was quickly won over by the quirky and highly entertaining narrative. While the plot doesn’t initially seem particularly believable, the author skilfully weaves an engaging, imaginative, and thoroughly enjoyable story. In amongst the unusual style of courting, supernatural themes and revenge, I found myself completely drawn in and had a great time reading it.

Thank you to The Book Guild, NetGalley and Paul Mendelson for this advanced copy.

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3.5⭐️
Arnie Garth is a porn producer in LA who only thinks of himself. Noreen Milburn is a sheep herder in the UK who only thinks of others. When Arnie has a heart attack and told the only way to save his soul is to fall in love with it (it’s in Noreen) within a week, he gets on a plane and then two worlds collide ridiculously.

This was a fun and funny read. An ultimate opposites eventually attract lark, with lots of lying and fish out of water humor.

Many thanks to NetGalley and The Book Guild for the eARC. These opinions are my own.

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