Outside the XY

This is a wonderful compilation of very inspiring essays from non-cis males about masculinity.

The story that really resonated with me was Lynnee Denise's I learned it from Watching You: Performing Masculinity while Unlearning Patriarchy.

I have no idea of what to say about this because the authors are all so diverse and yet cohesive in their experience and I adored that. I would absolutely recommend this to most people interested in the experience other lgbt+ people.

Wonderful collection of voices representing diversity of experience of queer black and brown (non-cis) masculinity.

This book is stunning -- genuinely stunning. I usually tear through books but this one just wouldn't let me. It's like eating truffles. Rich, dense, smooth truffles with layers of nuance and flavor.

So many things struck me about this book. The first quote that comes to mind is the last line from the title poem: Outside the XY, Why Not by Chino Hardin: I am the warrior who carries the message no matter the weight.

Unf.

This book is full of warriors who carry the message. Gay voices. Lesbian voices. Trans voices. Gender queer voices. Kink voices. Disabled voices. Voices of siblings and relatives -- some whom are better allies than others. Some authors delve into what it's like to have their sexual/gender identity - to be erased or abused by the straight community. Many of them talk about the experience of being erased by the caucasian community. Those of mixed race discuss not fitting into either.

There are love letters to childhood selves and memories of how childhood bodies transformed into something that felt unfamiliar. There was an untitled poem by Maya Thompson who shares the shock of identifying herself an oppressor and an abuser of those of who share her sex -- and how that shaped who she is now.

Victoria Carmen White is a memoir told by Parker T. Hurley that I wish would be read in every school. He speaks eloquently of growing up in a school with one other trans person (Victoria Carmen White). One was quiet, the other outspoken. The former lived to tell their story. There was a part near the end when Hurley describes losing the support of the queer community once he looked like the man he knew he was, of the fear-response others had of him just by his walking down the street, and of how he assimilated these aggressions, knowing the response couldn't be toward him personally but deeply feeling the effect of them.

The writing is exceptional across the board. I can imagine it being adopted in universities in departments beyond queer studies -- literature or comparative literature, for sure -- but it is not at all required to read this book as an academic in order to enjoy it. It is fantastic and gets my highest recommendation.

An important and thought provoking collection of writings. It's great to see underrepresented voices being given the chance to narrate their own experiences and share their own stories. An important book for anyone in 2017 and something to be proud of.

"This anthology is an offering. In it we share ourselves as humans, as queer bois, studs, butch babies, transmen, aggressives, tombois, the intersexed, stealth, gay, non-cisgendered men, brotherboys, women, machas, butches, lesbian, femmebois, unlabeled, ungendered and unbozed. We are a collection of people whose voices and reflections are stories that commemorate the human experience through the delicate lens of self-affirmation and honest reflection. Outside the XY is a quilt."
- Morgan Mann Willis

The above is how the lead editor introduces this anthology, and it more than lives up to this introduction. Outside the XY is a collection of writings from authors that have diverse backgrounds and diverse stories to tell. The unifying factor is that they are all people of colour and they write about their relationship with masculinity. Some of the authors identify as male but a lot of them don't, and the anthology is an especially rich collection of nonbinary experiences. The editors do not impose any one definition of masculinity on their anthology that the writers are expected to conform to. Instead they have chosen to represent how diverse experiences of masculinity are and the texts included in the anthology are very different from each other.

This anthology has everything: poems, essays, short stories, song lyrics, and letters. Some of them talk about individual, personal experiences, while some of them talk about how they have built their community. Others take are more academic approach. You'd think the end result would be chaotic but actually, it just comes across as authentic. Not imposing a certain style or point of view on the authors was a very smart and respectful choice. The end result really is a colourful and large quilt.

As with most anthologies, the texts can be a little bit of a hit and miss for an individual reader. I found some of the writings insightful, beautiful, and raw, while others fell flat for me. Still, all in all I enjoyed reading this. Although the anthology doesn't explicitly aim to be educational (it is very much written by the community for the community), I did still learn a lot about identities and communities that I had only heard the names of before. You can go into this anthology ready to learn about other people's experiences, but don't expect the authors to spoon-feed you or hold your hand. Understanding and learning from these texts is your responsibility.

It's hard to review anthologies-especially those which mix prose, poetry, essay, and stories-but this was great to read. The diversity of voices and experiences all coalesce into the overall important discussion of masculinity-its toxicity, the ways that queering masculinity can be liberating, and how race intersects and makes queer masculinity more complex.

This anthology is truly a masterpiece that everyone should read at least once in their lifetime! I laughed and cried at the depth of these reflections. Such an inspiring collection of prolific work!

This assortment of essays, poems, letters to loved ones, younger selves, and unknown seekers of self along with a one-act play addresses the concepts of gender identity, non-binary masculinity and femininity with very personal, intellectual, heartfelt explorations from contributors across the QUILTBAG diaspora—referred to as the diaspora of masculinity in queer and trans bois of color in the “About the Authors” section. From Haiti to Mexico, Ecuador to Australia. England to Atlanta, Georgia and New York City, New York in the U.S., these emotionally intimate queries in to the human condition span the globe. The scope of the topics is sorted into these six categories: Memory, Mirrors, Sex, Movement, Mother/Earth, Healing.

The Editor’s Note from Morgan Mann Willis includes the following statement, which also works as a declaration of intent, “Masculinity is not the thread that connects our work… this collection is sewn together by the struggle and progress of simply being alive.” On that point the multifaceted complexity of each black and brown author’s lived experiences and discerning observations resonate as authentically representative of a breadth and depth of diversity that’s often excluded in mainstream public discussions about everyday human rights violations of people whose identities have been marginalized by society.

In “Victoria Carmen White” by Parker T [sic] Hurley the narrator says, “I knew that there would never be a box that would fully encapsulate who I am.” Throughout Outside the XY that refusal to be contained within the narrow parameters of binary gender identity labels seems to be a source of each author’s strength, turmoil, and vulnerability.

There are many themes, ideas, and conundrums to excavate. Self-care, safe spaces, and love of oneself recur throughout the anthology. New-to-me terms like cis-tem, womyn, stud (NOT the same meaning as the way Sandy from Grease says it), Masculine of Center, Masculine-Identified Lesbian, tom, macha, Muxe, and AGs (NOT attorneys general) have added titles by Riki Wilchins and others to my TBR list. The poignant longing for recognition in “Tobacco” by D’Lo resonates in similar emotional intensity to “I, Too” by Langston Hughes, while the self-deprecating humor of Taylor Johnson’s TSA experience in “Masculinity as Phantasmagoria” is reminiscent of vintage “It’s Pat” sketches from Saturday Night Live years ago.

Fabian Romero offers provocative supposition in “Two Spirit and Gender Spirituality” that “For this reason I [F.R.] believe gender binary is a form of settler colonialism and deeply connected to white supremacy.” This idea is worth deeper study to me as a person who sees limiting gender labels being effectively used as tools of disenfranchisement. With ancient Greek and Roman society and literature in mind it’s going to require more investigation for me to make the leap to gender binary as inherently Anglo, but the author diligently sets out the merits of the argument.

Two passages sum up the ultimately compassionate, pragmatic, and optimistic revelatory vibe of this anthology. First, from “Low Visibility” by Bani Amor, “…gender rebels catch hell around the globe.” Second, from Kai M. Green on page 180, “We need to build relationships between men and women that allow space for both [all?] parties to grow.”

[The profanity is organic to the content and occurs with the most frequency in the Sex section, the f-word predominantly. Natch.]

*My 7-inch tablet plus not wearing my glasses when choosing this title equals not realizing it was published in August 2016, not 2018, until I was already enthusiastic about reading it.:-)

This is a great collection of black, brown and latinx voices exploring gender and sexuality from the perspective of people for whom the white, colonial concept of the gender binary does not apply. I found a lot of things in this book that were meaningful and helpful even as a white nonbinary person, and I'm definitely recommending this to all of my friends who want to read more about gender.

I got an ARC of this book.

I got this book in a hope to understand the black queer community a bit better. I was expecting a book that gave me an insight into terms and feelings. Something simple. Instead I was given complicated, intense, and a lot more than I ever expected.

The pieces ranged from poetry to academic pieces. I am sad to say that the academic pieces were few and far between. The ones that did make it into the anthology were accessible and anyone who references bell hooks instantly gets my attention, so I was hooked. The poetry was interesting, but not really my thing. There were a few pieces where I was just annoyed from the beginning, but I didn't want to censor the voices so I kept reading the piece. 

The pieces that really stood out to me were the ones about vulnerability and confusion. Many of the people were in an area where language failed them as far as identity. Then there were the pieces about how locked into masculinity someone can be, even when it is oppressive and not the right fit. It was a wonderful area to explore and I wish more of the pieces had been on that topic. I would have feasted on the words.

My main complaint about the book is that it is drastically longer than I had the attention span for. This could easily be broken into multiple books. I would have read multiple books. One book on each topic that the editors broke things down into would have been amazing. There was so much more to be said that didn't make it into this book, but there was a lot said. I found myself looking towards the end because it was so long. Give yourself a break, read this at a slow pace. Soak in the words.