Gripping

Sidney Bell is a new to me author and-spoiler alert-I'm impressed with her writerly skills. Within the first few pages I began to feel the first tingles of that romancelandia magic spell being woven that I love so much.

Loose Cannon is the first in The Woodbury Boys series and Church's story. I'm not sure how many books are planned but his two friends from Woodbury Residential Center are Tobias and Ghost who I'm hoping each get their own books. I'll come back to Ghost in a minute.

Church ends up at Woodbury for assault. Long story short-shitterific childhood with crappy parents combined with a bad night when he let his anger get the best of him. Church is by no means perfect and that's precisely what I loved about him. Bell did a phenomenal job crafting a gritty character. I loved being inside his head and experiencing his struggle to control his emotions. To say that I admire him sounds condescending but makes it no less true. He's one of the most perceptive, honest and fundamentally generous characters and it was a pleasure watching him evolve. He did a shitty thing as a kid that shouldn't define him for rest of his life and the more time I spent inside his head the more amazing he became.




Church has been in love with Miller since he made him scrambled eggs after catching him with one foot out the window with his TV. They meet prior to Church being sent to Woodbury and there are some flashbacks as both he and Miller fill in their backstory. Their relationship is rife with the kind of sexual tension that back builds and doubles over on itself.




Miller is slightly older and... I hate to say closeted because, quite frankly, I don't think he really knows if he's bi or gay because he thought he was straight. Until Church moves in, that is. Church is no longer a kid. He's all grown up and Miller keeps reacting to him in unexpected ways. Loose Cannon, through Miller's internal dialogue and characterization, examines in an insightful, poignant and thoughtful manner the tangled web that is human sexuality. It really shouldn't matter who he's attracted to, but he's been indoctrinated by a fire and brimstone family so he doesn't know what to think or do or say. He shouldn't have to "come out" over and over again. He shouldn't have to worry that people are judging him or worse for something he has no control over. But he does. It's not easy for him to accept what's happening between he and Church. Being honest with himself is a challenge so voicing what's going on in his head to someone else? Yeah, no. Which I found realistic and made me want to hug him, but if you need your MCs to communicate effectively, tread carefully.




Both of these characters are complex and expertly drawn and their romance is the kind that I find most satisfying. There's nothing I love more than two people who are not only are crazy about each other but who are good for each other. Church and Miller are and we're shown how good they are for each other again and again. Bell even threw in some cosseting. I ❤️ a good cosset. They have an innate connection and their witty banter highlights it and provides levity.

There is angst and they have to work to be together but that difficulty and struggle is what makes this read so worthwhile, IMO. Miller's got so much baggage to unpack and make sense of before they can really get to the sex. There is some and their first time was passionate and funny and did I mention Miller's the bigger of the two? *eyebrows* It's probably the most relatable sex scene I've ever read because what's better than being able to laugh during the sexy times with your lobster?




Now, Ghost. Ghost is a living, breathing, lethal enigma wrapped in a paradox, cloaked in a femme physique, boy shorts and guyliner. I have a feeling his story is going to break me and I honestly cannot wait to be broken. Bell struck a great balance between the romance and the suspense. The suspense storyline is not complete and Ghost is going to be instrumental in it. There is a Russian crime family that Ghost arranges a job for Church at one of their legit businesses. Naturally, something bad happens then one of the brothers becomes fixated on Church. This is really the only plot point that I struggled with a time or two because Vasya is an untrustworthy and volatile dumbass. I don't know why his brothers would follow him but whatevs, it certainly made for some edge of my seat reading.

Lena is the matriarch of this family and she's as cold as ice. And she wants Ghost for something. Alls I'm saying is if she fucks with my boy I will Gogo her fictional ass.




I don't wanna. But I will so don't test me, Lena.

Recommend to all romance and suspense fans, but fair warning you'll be hooked on a new series.






A review copy was provided by NetGalley.

4* A good start to a new series, but less 'heavy' than Bad Judgment, though that is no criticism.

Bad Judgment was an amazing debut from this author, and this tale is very, very different, and tbh, there's no comparison between the two. This statement kind of clashes with the title of this review, but it is true, though there's darkness in both tales. Simply different kinds of darkness.

It's a tale of a life - Church's - that started off in a bad place, got to a better place when he came into Miller's life, but then got mired in some horror and further darkness, resulting in Church's time inside, where he's learned about himself, made friends - Tobias and Ghost and comes out determined to be a better person. It's a tale that's pretty full-on emotions-wise and there's a lot that both characters go through for each other - one perhaps more, mentally, and the other certainly more in a physical sense.

It's a tale in which I felt the love, which at times wasn't on the same page, but by the end, there was no doubt in my mind that the leads were at the start of their HEA.

I really enjoyed this book and hope to read more of Church's friends.

ARC courtesy of Carina Press and NetGalley, for my reading pleasure.

WTF are you doing?!? Right now you should be getting your finger ready to..........one click ;) I know what you were thinking you dirty, dirty thang….

On a more serious note, go buy this frickin book now! If you are having performance problems, I will spell it out for you. This book is really that good! Have you ever read that one book that just wowed you; like really wowed you? That you knew that every book thereafter, at least for a good while, would pale in comparison. Because this is that book for me.

To be honest with you, the blurb did nothing for me. However, what did catch my eye was the author, Sidney Bell. See, I tried her first début book <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/30639307-bad-judgment" target="_blank">Bad Judgement</a> and fell in love. I vowed to try her next book no matter what. Well, two things happened. First, I actually followed through on something I said. Second, I was pleasantly surprised by this story. Please take my word, and try this book even if the blurb doesn’t catch your eye as well. Seriously, there is more to this book than what is in that tiny promotional piece. Really, it’s that good!

Sidney Bell really has a knack for telling a story. I'm not just talking about putting words together. I'm talking about how in every sentence she writes she brings emotion and depth into each line and therefore into each character. In fact, in Miller and Church’s first penetration scene, how she orchestrates the scene is just breathtaking. Yet, there is so much more to their story. The emotional development that Miller and Church go through, you cannot help but feel for them. First you have Church who has had a rough life and thinks very low himself; doesn't think that he's worth anyone's time, yet Miller thinks the world of him. Then you have Miller trying to live up to his father's ideals. What a man is and should be. Therefore, he too doesn’t think he is worth anything, much less deserve love, at least the type of love that he wants, all because of his father. However, Church is willing to accept any part of Miller that he is willing to offer; just wanting to be worthy of his love.

What starts off as a boy and young man from opposite sides, turns into a friendship that is suddenly separated due to bad choices and miscommunication. However, life has a way of bringing these two men back together where everything seems to fall back into place. And it is beautiful. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that Miller doesn't piss me off every time he runs away, because he does. However, it was nice that the author didn't keep them apart for long because there is so much more going on it would have been overkill. She really does have a way with finding balancing within the story. To read such a story that mimics life, and doesn’t always fix itself right away was wonderful. Because life is messy and I like how her writing demonstrates just that. This is truly an amazing story that keeps you on the edge of your seat.

Fast forward four months later, and the epilogue gives us hope going forward of Miller and Church’s relationship. Still healing, Miller is coming to terms with his feelings and how the world perceives him with Church by his side. As for Church, he is home where he belongs with Miller. Working everyday to make things easier for Miller while he’s healing and trying to better himself for their future. I’m not going to lie, it would be nice if we are given a small novella in the future to get an update on these two. Regardless, I am happy with the realistic ending that the author delivered. It is true to the storyline, and I can admire and appreciate that.

Even though I wouldn't say this book ends in a cliffhanger of sorts, it does. There a lot of unanswered questions.
What is going on between Yelena Krayeva and Ghost?
What was in the folder that Yelena had on Ghost?
What is going on within the syndicate that Yelena belongs too?
Will anything ever come of Tobias and Ghost?
Tobias is very fragile compared to the other boys. So, I am wondering what will happen to him now that Church is with Miller and Ghost has basically disappeared?

This book was good. It had its pros and it had its cons......

Pros:
The author did vulnerability really really really really well. You could feel every thought and every doubt with both the MCs.
The author did great at the show not tell rule. I love reading a book where I feel as if I am walking through the pages as opposed to being a standby-er.
The side characters. Loved them.

Cons:
The mystery.... was it a mystery?? I dont know I didn't get the feel that it was and there was ALOT of DRAMA that unfolded btwn so many different parties that sometimes it bored me.
I have a penchant for warlords, criminals, those who walk that thin line btwn good and bad.
Some of my favourite books have these types of people in them. I wish that part of the story was handled a little better but that is just me.

I hope that book 2 in this series that will feature Ghost adds more to the mystery? side of things.

All in all I spent 2 days with all these guys and I did enjoy it.

There you go Kristie. This one is for you.

Mare~Slitsread

An ARC was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
** spoiler alert ** ** spoiler alert ** ** spoiler alert ** ** spoiler alert ** ** spoiler alert ** ** spoiler alert **

This book had me hooked from the start. Edgar-Allen Church (goes by Church) is a young boy who tries to be good but life just has other plans. At the age of 14 or 15 he meets Miller, a 24 year old man with a soft heart. Church suffers an abusive home with his alcoholic father and passive mother. When Church breaks into Miller's home to steal his TV, their lives both change in ways neither expected. Miller (because he's a do-gooder with a soft heart), offers to help Church and allows him to sleep on his couch whenever he needs to. Over time Miller learns about Church's home life and he becomes the male role model for Church.

For Church, his time with Miller is a safe haven; a place he can just be and not have to worry about anything. Miller's cool with Church being gay. But when Church tries to seduce Miller one night, things don't go well and Church runs away. Being a hot head, angry kid, Church finds himself at a youth rehabilitation center and has not been in contact with Miller for years. Now that Church is of age, he can't stay at the center any more (he's "graduated") and needs to live with a responsible adult - someone who can be a good influence on Church and lead him down the path of good vs evil. And so Church calls Miller for a favor, and Miller accepts.

Things are awkward between them because they have that night hanging over their heads. Despite their age difference, they had been best friends all those years ago, and they both missed each other. What's sad is that Church is in love with Miller and Miller has made it clear he doesn't feel that way about Church.

[The night when Church attempts to seduce Miller, Church had climbed into Miller's bed one night as he lay sleeping and touches him and kisses him. For a few seconds Miller responds but then he wakes up fully and starts to scream derogatory things at Church and lashes out. Yeah, it didn't go well, and Church runs away. The hateful words that Miller lets loose that night come from his father; at a young (very young) age, Miller hears his father talking about homosexuals and that they are going to burn in hell. One day Miller and his father are sitting outside eating in town and they see two men holding hands and kissing. For Miller, it's not so much a light bulb going off (he's maybe 8 I think), as it is a an awareness. He's known he was different, not understanding how he was different, but he just intuitively knew he was different and seeing those two men kiss sort of settled his stomach in a way. But he hears his dad talk about those men, that they are going to burn for their sins, and Miller knows he can never speak about his awareness. (hide spoiler)]

Church made friends at the youth rehabilitation center (Ghost and Tobias), and he reconnects with them now that he's on the "outside." Ghost helps Church get a job at a sandwich shop and Church sleeps on Miller's couch. All's good. Except for the fact that the sandwich shop's owner has ties to Russian mafia (his mom is the crime boss), and Vasily, the eldest brother, is a real asshat who makes Church's life hell.

It's hard to describe what follows without giving away the entire story. With Church staying at Miller's house, and now that Church is all grown up (and handsome and jacked), Miller is struggling with denying who he is. Soon even Church starts to realize that Miller is looking at him. I found their dance around each other to be amusing and I laughed at some of the hijinks these two went through as they navigated their way. [I found it very odd that they didn't talk about Miller hiding his sexuality. Once they got together, I was expecting Miller to explain why he hid himself. I was very disappointed that didn't happen. (hide spoiler)]

I really enjoyed this story and do recommend it. There is a lot more going on than I mention; it's really action packed, never a dull day, so be aware there are like 5 different things going on here. [Miller and Church's relationship; the Russian mama crime boss trying to get Ghost to do something for her; Vasily being an asshat drug runner out to make Church's life miserable and filled with pain; Miller's home and truck being vandalized by someone (not telling you who); and Church trying to figure out how to fix all of that. (hide spoiler)] Yep, a lot going on. I don't know what book 2 will be about but I really hope it's about Ghost. LOVED him!!! [I'm waiting for Ghost to be an undercover cop or something; I don't really think he is, but it crossed my mind. (hide spoiler)]

You are probably tired of the spoiler tags so I promise this is the last one [ This could just be me nitpicking. When a character has their inner monologue about whatever, and then the next scene happens and it's about their inner monologue, I find that a little too neat and tidy. For example (this isn't literally what happened but an example): Church is thinking about Miller and how Miller will never be his friend again. And then the next scene has Miller coming up to Church saying, "I want to be your friend again." Things like that, you know? "Oh, he'll never love me;" next scene: "I love you." It's like they are mind readers or something (or had an ARC of their own, LOL). (hide spoiler)]

I give this a 4.25-4.3 star rating. It's odd I know. DEAL!! :-D

4.5 Stars

I could not put this book down. The only time I stopped reading was when I'd message to my bestie Mare to tell her to stop what she was doing and start reading with me. Other than that, it was fully steam ahead from page one.

I don't think I knew what to expect when I started reading Loose Cannon, but I know now that I got way more than I'd hoped. This is a wonderfully written story about love, coming out, self discovery, acceptance, letting go, forgiveness, and so much more. It's simply beautiful and I can't recommend it enough. The story is compelling. The characters are exceptional. The writing beautiful. The vulnerability shown is stunning.

I'm excited for my from this author, and more in this series especially.

I received an ARC via NetGalley in exchange for my honest review.

I almost didn’t pick this book up. It’s hard for a criminal who went to prison to be interesting to me. I don’t see there being any redeemable qualities there. I still liked Church though. I actually liked Church before Miller. To some degree Miller had to make more life changes than Church did. Miller had to shape up to be good enough for Church. I know that sounds crazy with Church being the parolee. Now Church isn’t one of those wrongfully jailed characters either. He did something bad, something hurtful and violent. Church was rightfully jailed and he struggles everyday with his problems but in the end he wants to be a better man.
So Church is released from Woodbury on the conditions that he finds a job and lives with a positive role model, a good upstanding citizen, Miller. They profess their love for one another and get their hearts and flowered filled happily ever after. Not so simple. Trouble finds Church and it’s a situation he couldn’t have prevented stumbling into. None the less it’s a crap situation that he doesn’t know how to get out of. The situation appears to follow him around and drag Miller into it as well. There are few things that Church truly wants in life and it looks like the world is against him in having those things.
Loose Cannon was a solid start to a new series. Sidney Bell is a new to me author. I am looking forward to reading more from this new author. If my suspicions are correct The Woodbury Boys series will center on the three young men that met there. Considering what Woodbury is they all three have something in their past that landed them in jail for more than a couple of nights. We got to see a little more of the criminal element with Ghost so perhaps he will be featured in the next book. Bell did a marvelous job of giving readers just enough character information about Tobias and Ghost to keep our interest piqued about where she can go with them.

4.5 stars!

This is my first book by this author, but I can already tell you that it won't be my last. The writing style is truly engaging, and I was enthralled from start to finish by this book.

When we first meet Edgar-Allen Church, who simply goes by his last name, he's about to be released from the correctional facility where he's spent the last five years after a conviction for assault. He needs a place to stay, so he calls on his old friend Miller Quinn in hopes of crashing on his couch.

There's some history here I won't go into too much (plus some hero worship on Church's side), between Church and Miller, and while some of it is good, some of it definitely isn't. Church is gay, and he's not hiding it, but Miller's conservative upbringing hinders him from allowing himself to be who he truly is.

This has caused their previous friendship to falter, but Church is still in love with Miller, though willing to keep that to himself, since his previous advance in that direction wasn't welcome. Miller likes Church, and he is secretly attracted to the younger man, but he can't possibly be gay because reasons.

As the story unfolds, we get some background info on Church, and his friends Ghost and Tobias. This is not presented as an info dump, but cleverly woven into the story as flashbacks of sorts, and really paints a complete picture of Church's rough upbringing, and shows clearly how difficult his life has been so far. How lost he is, and how Miller is really a beacon for him. If only...

But the romance, slow burning from the start, that eventually unfolds between these two, as Miller starts to shed the shackles that keep him from admitting his attraction and claiming who he really is, is not the main focus of this book. There's action too, and a Russian Cartel, harassment against Church that nearly derails his journey to real adulthood, and some suspense as well, what with Ghost (who needs his own book) trying his best to... well, you should read this for yourself.

The two main characters really grow throughout the book, with Church getting his anger under control and growing up into the man he was supposed to be, and Miller freeing himself from the voice inside that belongs to his late and very homophobic father and allowing himself to return Church's affection. Their chemistry was hot, and while there are some more explicit scenes, they were tasteful and clearly showed their emotional connection. These two men just fit together, and I fully believed that they truly loved each other.

I also appreciated the author for including a strong female character in Miller's sister, and his niece was also well portrayed. While they are supporting characters, they both played a role that helped Miller and Church move forward.

Ghost was a really interesting character too, and while we don't find out much about him, or what he really does, there is sufficient information to understand that he too cares for Church, and will do what he has to so his friend has a chance to make it. Tobias too was a good friend to Church - he has a slightly different background but was there when needed, even if it might be detrimental to himself.

The plotline with the Russian Cartel was intriguing, and while I have no direct experience with that sort of thing, it did feel realistic here. I'm pretty sure this sort of thing does happen in similar ways as depicted here, and I appreciated that the author seems to have done good research into this topic.

At its core, this book is about second chances and finding redemption. These themes apply not only to Church and Miller, but also to Ghost, who's probably the most mysterious of all the characters in the book. Church and Miller are given a second chance, not only as far as their relationship is concerned, but also as far as living an authentic life, especially Miller, and finding peace with who they are, with each other, and with the lot they've been given in this life.

A highly engaging read, and highly recommended. I need more from this author. Could Ghost's story be next, please?

4.5 stars!

Holy hell! Talk about an emotional roller-coaster. Jesus Christ. This book was packed with emotions and so many twists. WOW!!!! I didn't think I would have liked the story as much as I did.

Miller and Church.

Their relationship was anything but normal when they first met and for a few years after that. But their chemistry is all there and their friendship was absolutely adorable.

There are a few chapters that give us a glimpse of how they first met and I thought that was a nice touch to the story. She had us guessing as to what had happened 5 years ago. You'll meet Ghost and Tobias - Church's friends. I am especially excited to see if Ghost gets a story because that would be amazing! I'm so intrigued by him.

I actually have very little words right now to describe everything that took place in Loose Cannon . There were the mafia, fantastic suspense, a love story, good friendships all included. I feel like every page was something new waiting to happen. You will be surprised, shocked, happy, sad, angry.

When you see Church and Miller fall in love without even knowing, it was something that made me bang my head against the fall and yet totally be swooned by them. If you're looking to read a story with the mafia, suspense, a friends-lovers trope than this story is right up your alley.

Loose Cannon was my first time reading Bell (though at this point there’s only one previous book from her) and I can say I’d easily try another book from her. This book wasn’t a complete hit for me, but it wasn’t a total miss either, falling in the middle at “okay”. There were some parts I really enjoyed and some parts that threw me a bit, but nothing that was terrible or bad about it. Simple put: I liked it, but it didn’t wow me.

I liked their friendship and non-sexual intimacy – both in the past and present. I loved the scenes that showed us their early interactions and thought they added a lot to the story.

It’s a bit of a slow burn for these two, primarily because Miller has major hang ups about his sexuality because of the homophobic shit his father preached all his life. But the chemistry was there, and the sex, when it finally comes into play, is quite hot.

But I felt like the pacing for the book was inconsistent – sometimes things were dragged out, other times they went from point A to B with little explanation on page (as much for character issues as plot). Again, this wasn’t bad enough to be an outright fail for me, but it was enough to make the story feel uneven and a bit rough at times. And the Russian family plot, frankly, left me more confused than intrigued. Perhaps it’s intentional so that it can be covered more in the next book(s), but I still felt like I was missing so much here.

I’m curious enough about Ghost and what’s going on with him, but I also know that his story is not going to be at all easy to read, just based on what glimpses we got here.

Overall: I liked this one, and read it quickly, but I also found myself occasionally skimming (towards the end in particular) and had moments of “meh, this is okay”. Still, I liked enough about it and the writing itself to try Bell again.

Loose Cannon by Sidney Bell is the first in the Woodbury Brothers series. This is a really emotional read. Church has gone through a lot in this book. He goes from being an angry youth to a less angry man with a future. I liked meeting his friends along the way makes me want more from this series. I would love to see how they turn out later on.
Edgar Allen Church or just Church as he would have it, he is a boy who likes to use his fists a lot. This gets him in jail for manslaughter. When he gets released years later he is a little lost. Lucky for him his one friend has always seen through the anger in Church to the man he could become with someone believing in him.
Church is a very strong, loyal, and don't tell him I said this part but he is loving too. He feels things deeply but does not want to let others know that.
Miller has always been there for Church. Miller thinks he is straight but Church is the one boy he could never get out of his heart. Miller struggles with his feelings for his best friend. While Church struggles to stay on the straight and narrow.
Both of these men are kind, sweet, and loyal. They each bring a certain strength of character to the other one. It is one of the reasons they are great together. They just have to let the past go so they can find a future worth living.
If you want a gritty, sweet, and intense read I highly suggest this one. I loved watching Church grow into the man he becomes in the end.

Five Shooting Stars

This book didn't have me as hooked as I was hoping, the blurb and cover won me straight away.
Church and Miller have a angst slow burn romance, the writing is good and I enjoyed the story. But unfortunately there was a little too much back and forwards for me to enjoy.

A little age difference, and being best friends when they were younger is always a fav of mine to read about, there is a lot going on in this book, which for me took away from there romance.

with both characters were interesting to read about, I think fans of this author will enjoy her next story.

This is an engaging romance. The leads have a lot of history together and have grown/developed in their time apart but when they reunite, it's explosive. This is an angst filled romance where one lead has trouble admitting he's gay so if you hate that trope, be ye warned! I thought Miller's inner struggle was just long enough without destroying the romance possibility. Church's struggle isn't one of sexuality but instead, anger management. I thought this was extremely well written and believable. The mystery was well done. What pushes this from a good read to a great read, is the secondary characters. Miller's sister and niece are well developed female characters we rarely see in MM romance but it's Church's friends who steal the show. I desperately want their book(s)!
This is a great read that fans of angsty MM romance must pick up.

Overall the book was just ok for me. I liked the idea of this story (which seams to be a theme with me lately-the idea of the story is great, but I lack a connection with the book) and for the most part, the character's were ok. I don't want to spoil too much here with the plot, but, like the blurb tells you Church is a young....ex con-ish like character, who, upon his release, has no one to go to. No one, except Miller, a man he met in his younger years, who helped him out. Miller was raised in a very religious home, so the feeling's he has for Church are "frowned upon". Miller is just going through the motions of life. Then Church is back in his life, and he realizes the friendship he desires could be more.

Thus is the journey of these two men, coming together and making it through some trials and tribulations. I didn't dislike Miller and Church, but some of the side character's were unbecoming to me. Otherwise, as previously stated, this one was just ok for me.

excellent read