I've taken a very, very long time reading this book, and that doesn't happen often. I've read and re-read passages, journaled about passages, written down quotes from the book, and have deeply pondered the content. I have loved this book, and will be purchasing a physical copy, as I currently have a copy that was graciously given to me by the publisher, free of charge via the NetGalley program. I was not required to write a review of any kind.

This book, though written from a somewhat Catholic perspective, was deeply influential for this member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (i.e. "Mormon"). I consider myself a wayward Christian, and have really run the gamut of faiths, studying anything and everything on faith, Christian or otherwise, that I have been able to get my hands on over the years. At nearly 45, I've settled into a wonderful, comfortable place with my faith, and though I consider myself a "progressive" member of my church, I am fundamentally and at my core in love with anything having to do with Jesus. Thus, prayer is a topic that I drink up often, and an action that I perform as much as possible.

Heather King's "Holy Desperation" came to me at a time when I was floundering in my faith and life, in general. I had encountered a severe and long-spanning bout of depression and self-induced isolation, and I was truly scratching and clawing spiritually for any amount of help I could find. Anything, anything to re-find my faith. This book, along with the support of family and friends, and a few other delicious writings, helped me move slowly, but surely, back onto solid ground, to strengthen my prayer life, and to get myself back into a position to start leaving the house again (literally).

There are so many wonderful, quotable quotes from this book. One of my favorite and most straightforward quote from the books is, "The best way I know is just to sit down and talk to God, or open yourself to him, or do whatever feels comfortable or urgent or natural in the sense that you couldn't hold back even if you wanted to." During my time of depression, that word "urgent" was a word that truly jumped out at me. Yes, everything felt urgent, desperate, but so bogged down and heavy that it was hard to filter through the sludge inside my head and heart. But seeing that word was SO very helpful, because it reminded me that others feel those heavy feelings, too, and we are not alone. We are absolutely not alone.

I loved this book. LOVED this book. I highly recommend it to anyone who considers themselves a Christian, whether devout or peripheral. It's just such a helpful, no-nonsense book, and I can't recommend it enough.

The title of this book ‘Holy Desperation’, grab my attention immediately. Also the subtitle of the book ‘Praying as If Your Life Depends on It’ spoke to me. There have been times where all that has kept me going is prayer; even times when my faith was a struggle, prayer got me through some really tough times. So I dove in with great anticipation. But the book was not quite what I expected. But the book was not as what I expected it to be. The book was far more autobiography, and about service, reaching out and going beyond your comfort zone than it was a guide to praying especially in hard times. Now don’t get me wrong there was a lot about praying. And specifically praying when you don’t think you should, or don’t feel you should.

The chapters in this book are:
About Fr. Damien
Part One Crisis.
1 The Prayer of Desperation
2 Grabbed by the Throat
3 What Do We Mean by God?
4 The Set-Aside Prayer
Part Two Death: To Our Old Ideas and Supposed Unlovability
5 “Stay Awake!”.
6 Where Two or More Are Gathered in My Name
7 I Call You Friends .
8 Go to Your Room and Pray in Secret
9 Let Him Who Is without Sin Cast the First Stone .
Part Three Resurrection: Getting Radically in on New Life
10 You Cannot Serve Both God and Mammon
11 Tempted in the Desert
12 Store Up Your Treasure in Heaven.
13 Unless a Grain of Wheat Fall to the Ground
Endnotes
About the Author

The author writes from personal experience. And it is experience that is very different than the road most of us will walk. But heathers vulnerability, openness, and transparency about her own struggles and the way her own prayer life has changed and progresses serve as an example to us all. It serves as an example of not just wanting prayer in our life, but about walking the walking. Growing prayer as part of our life, day in and day out. About waling prayer.

This was my introduction to the writings of Heather King. But it will not be the last. The writing style is very engaging. It is easily accessible. I really enjoyed this book and immediately though of a few friends who would enjoy it and a few others who would really benefit from reading it. So sometimes when you get what you are not expecting it is exactly what you need, and that is how I feel about this book!

Somewhere on the second page of this book, I said out loud 'Oh my god, this is so good'. Around the forth page I had a bit of a cry. And then I alternated between tears and little 'OMG yes!!' moments for the rest of the book. (By page 10 I had started drafting a letter in my head to the author thanking her for gifting this book to the world).
After that I did actually manage to settle down my inner dialogue just a tad, and had the chance to enjoy one of the best books that I've read for quite some time. Quotes such as 'I'd never had anything against God. I just thought God was for people who weren't very smart' connected with me so perfectly that I felt an immediate kinship with the author, and although I'd never struggled with addiction as she has done, I've had a fractured and tumultuous journey from atheism to the catholic church, so there was a combination of 'yes, me too' moments, and 'I'd never thought of it that way before' which made this read both deeply satisfying and also challenging.
Heather King is a relatable mystic for our times. Her writing is so enjoyable that you don't even realise that you have taken onboard some deep wisdom until you recall it later in the week when challenged by some difficult life circumstance. Absolutely one to buy a hard copy of and lend to friends!

I found this book to be very helpful with my prayer life. Many times I wonder am I praying the correct way, am I sending my prayers up in a way that is pleasing to God. This book has helped me and I found it to be a useful addition in my Walk of Faith. The author presented her writings in a very straight forward way. Thank you NetGalley, the author and publisher for the advanced copy of this book in return for my honest review.