This is probably closer to 3.5 stars. I found the isolation and odd circumstance of the town of Lost provided a surrealism around this story that was at some times magical and at other times creepy. Nijkamp set this storyline up to become a dialogue about mental illness in teens - and it gets to the cusp of the issue and falls a little flat as the focus shifts to the culture of Lost and possible malicious intent of the townspeople... This story is full of quirky complex characters and a strong undercurrent of what it means to be a friend. I also enjoyed the different narrative styles in the text and their ethereal quality at times supported the magical backdrop. This is definitely a good fit for the YA genre. I received an ARC of this book. All opinions are my own.

In Before I Let Go by Marieke Nijkamp, Corey returns to her hometown in Alaska to cope with the loss of her best friend, Kyra. While she's there she has to come to terms with the nature of her relationship to the community she calls family and also to her friendship with Kyra. You feel the roller coaster ride of highs and lows that Corey goes through to get through the week in her hometown.

This book was so wonderfully put together. It rightfully describes bi-polar disorder to it's very core. Before I Let Go is a great read for young adults who might have a best friend or even a family member that has been diagnosed with b-polar disorder. I believe it gives a profound look on the inside and might give young adults more understanding on how to cope or help cope with mental diseases.

Before I Let Go kept my on the edge of my seat the entire read. I would recommend this read to anyone!

Mixed emotions here. As a story, it had potential, but then it was really harmed by some major issues. It has the "obligatory" person confused about what they are, it has narration that tells and doesn't show. I can't figure out what this book is supposed to be, because it's jumbled up. Thriller, or tragedy, or borderline horror, or? I'd have given it more stars if it were clearer what this really was. It's a little like the movie you watch and wonder what it was you just watched because you can't make sense of it.

My copy came from Net Galley. My thoughts and opinions are my own. This review is left of my own free volition.

I came across Before I Let Go book on Netgalley, and I thought it seemed like a good candidate for my classroom library as well as a book I might enjoy. Corey, the protagonist learns of her best friend’s death in the first pages of the novel. The plot is fraught with Corey unearthing the details of the death. Nijkamp does a nice job crafting the mood of this novel. She says in the acknowledgements that she wrote much of it while staying in a Scottish mansion, and that makes a lot of sense! There is a delightful mystery to the story that is reminiscent of the old show Twin Peaks. One thing that surprised me was the elements of LGBTQ. This aspect was also really well done and felt very natural for the most part. I would recommend this to YA and mystery fans. I will be adding it to my list of books to buy for my classroom library as it definitely addresses more than one type of story: coming of age, female friendship, mystery, and more.

I have no clue how I actually feel about this book... Actual rating 3.5/5 stars. I think...

Set in the isolated community of Lost Creek, Alaska, this is the story of once-best friends Corey and Kyra. Corey has returned to her former home only to find herself labelled an outsider. But struggling to fit in is the least of the troubles she faces here. In her absence Kyra, the best friend she left behind, slipped below the ice that enshrouds their small community and died a tragic death. Corey seems to be the only who who truly remembers the girl that was lost and is the only one willing to search for answers.

Part of my inability to navigate my feelings about this book is due to how mesmerising I found the quality of writing. I so badly wanted to award this the full 5 stars as I found beauty in every sentence and was enchanted by the way Nijkamp structured and vividly created such an atmospheric and eerie setting.

However, regardless of my adoration for these aspects, I struggled to fully immerse myself in the story-line. Early on, I was fascinated by the mystery but when the intrigue kept adding and nothing seemed to be resolved I was left a little disappointed. Some semblance of an explanation was garnered about two-thirds of the way through but it felt like an unsatisfactory one, for me, and as so much of the book was still left I was awaiting a thrilling plot twist that never arrived.

Despite my misgivings in this area, I still found this a wonderfully diverse read that discoursed authentically and sensitivity on a variety of real-world topics. I am still so glad to have read this, even if only for the chance to experience such sublime writing, and have this author pegged as one who I will continue to explore.

I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. Thank you to the author, Marieke Nijkamp, and the publisher, Sourcebooks Fire, for this opportunity.

I don't like this book which is surprising because of how much I loved Marieke's last book. I found that this really glorified suicide and I really didn't like that. It just made me real uncomfortable being someone who has previously attempted suicide.

Chapters narrated in before and after the finding of the body of Kyra. Young women's friend Corey arrives in Lost Creek Alaska to find that even though she used to live there she is now treated like an outcast. How did Kyra die? Was it suicide or did the town have something to do with it? Characters were not given any heart and the plot was poorly presented. Took a long time to read because of these two issues. "A copy of this book was provided by Sourcebooks Fire via Netgalley with no requirements for a review. Comments here are my honest opinion."

Corey moved away from the only home she really knew in Lost Creek Alaska and promised her BFF, Kyra, that she would still stay in touch and stay the same friend she always had been. Though lost in teenage life, Corey makes new friends and starts this whole new life and keeping in touch with Kyra became more and more difficult. Though Corey told herself she would return to Lost Creek soon and see Kyra. Though before that happens Kyra is found under the ice in the lake, dead. There are different stories about just what happened. Some say she went looking for a week spot and did this on purpose. after battling mental illness for years. Corey knows she has to return and get answers to just what really happened that night.

I wills start off by saying this is my first Nikamp book. And this wasn't a bad story. I love the synopsis. It also had a really great hook. The short chapters were helpful, too, because it gave me a place to stop. I often read at work and it is easier to have shorter chapters. I loved the town of Lost Creek. It is creepy with people that are just as creepy and everyone has a secret it seems.

Unfortunately, half the time, I had no idea what was even going on. Some of the flashbacks didn't seem to have a point and even finishing the book, I can't find one. I was lost through most of this book. I didn't care for the character of Corey, I felt she could have been a bit more developed and I often found her annoying when I did understand what was going on. And even with the short chapters this book seemed to drag on. And I did love the town of Lost Creek, but at times it was unrealistic. I grew up in a small town and I think it missed the mark sometimes.

Overall I have it 2.5 stars. This book wasn't for me, though it hasn't put me off of reading more Nijkamp. I would probably try something else of hers, but I wouldn't re-read or recommend this book.

When Corey planned a trip to her former hometown of Lost, Alaska, she had no idea that she would also be attending a funeral for her former best friend, Kyra. So many things have changed in Lost since Corey's family moved away. The town seems revitalized and full of life. The people who once shunned Kyra now seem to revere her and are a lot less friendly towards Corey. She didn't expect the hostility she received from her former friends and the people she once considered family or all of the mystery and unanswered questions that surrounded Kyra's death. Corey refuses to leave town without answers but getting those answers may leave her in Lost forever.

This book was intriguing and engaging although it was a bit predictable and left several questions unanswered. I was also confused about the script-like chapters that were randomly dispersed throughout the book. To me, they were awkward and completely interrupted the flow of the story. Overall, I enjoyed the story and Corey's determination to uncover and reveal Kyra's story.

<b>Thank you NetGalley for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review. </b>

This book started well and I really wanted to like it but it was just okay for me. The main character seemed to be able to see the future but that part didn't seem to be developed the way it could have been and I feel like the story line flattened. This small town in Alaska sure did want to hold on to its secrets and I feel as if I kept wanting more action and mystery. I feel like the story ended with more questions than answers but was that what the author intended? It's really unclear. I didn't hate the book by any means but the action never seemed to go anywhere.

This book was an interesting one. It was addictive for sure and I found myself reading 100 pages at a time. I read this in two sittings over two days and I really liked it. I've never read this author before and I think this was a brilliant introduction for me.

I loved the mystery surrounding the town of Lost Creek and how things are not as they seem, especially when Corey returns after her best friend, Kyra, is found dead.

The journey the reader takes with Corey is brilliant. I loved learning about the town and the creepiness of it added to my need to know what happened and how it all turned out.
The action scenes were well written and the set-up of the book was great. Rather than using just text like a normal book, we also got to see unwritten letters, text messages and even some screen-playish stuff. It was great to break up the monotony of regular text. We also learn about the girls' history through flashback chapters.

If you're looking for an addictive read, then definitely consider giving this one a go!

One of my favourite books of 2015 was This Is Where It Ends, a story of an American school shooting written by a Dutch writer, and with the most gorgeous chalk cover art which still gives me shivers.So when I noticed that Source Books was at YALC, I went looking to see if they had proof copies of her second book, Before I Let Go, and I was delighted to realise that they did.
I went into this book expecting another realism. Having thoroughly enjoyed This Is Where It Ends, I wanted an exploration of the mystery of Kyra’s death, treatment of mental illness, female friendship, asexuality, and possibly murder or small town prejudices. And I did get all of those things. There were lots of really great things in this. It actually reminded me a lot of the book I read immediately before (Nemesis), not only because of the isolated, small-town nature of the protagonists, but also the explorations of prejudice and the notion of the treatment of outsiders. But the other way in which this book reminded me of my feelings about Nemesis was that I went in expecting something that I did not get.

before I let go is a magical realism book. There’s something almost other-worldly about Kyra, the nature of her death, and her existence in the time since Corey left Lost Creek, their tiny Alaskan town. And I just really don’t like magical realism as a genre. I like fantasy – I like high fantasy, I like low fantasy, I like YA fantasy, I like adult fantasy. I also like thrillers, murder mysteries, conspiracy books. And I like realism. So I should, in theory, like magical realism. But I really, really don’t. So as I went through this book and realised that this was where it was going, I just disengaged more and more.

I think my disgust with magical realism is that it never really gives an explanation for anything. How did this happen? Was it real? Was it just mental illness? I hate that kind of ambiguity and the lack of clarity you get from it.

So although the relationship between Kyra and Corey was lovely, and the murder mystery was dark and creepy, and the small-town mentality of Lost and how they treat Corey as an outsider less than a year after she left the town was wonderfully drawn, and Nijkamp is still a really great writer, I did NOT like this book.

But that’s on me. I just hate magical realism. So my rating of this book is my reflection of how much I enjoyed it, and not really how good it was. I’m not sure if that’s fair to Nijkamp, as it really is well-written, but this is my opinion, so I’m giving the rating!

This book was not exactly what I expected but it was a pleasant surprise. When Corey left her friend, Kyla, back in Alaska to persue her education, everyone was afraid of Kyla due to her having bipolar disorder. However, a few months later when Corey comes back to town everyone swears that Kyra was truly loved by everyone and they seem to support her suicide. Things start getting weirder and weirded and Corey starts looking for the truth as she was Kyra's one and only true friend prior to leaving and knows that things are not adding up.

The pacing was great. I was intrigued through out the book even though I was a little confused/distracted at what I was reading since it was not what I was expecting, which is the reason it lost a star. I would recommend this book and to go into it with an open mind as to why things are weird.

This book was a little ironic to me. The entire book was our main character, Corey, visiting her hometown after her best friend, Kyra's, apparent suicide. The entire book details Corey's dislike for her home town Lost, and it's people for treating Kyra as less than a person. They've also just seen her for her Bipolar Disorder but the author's lack of character development for Kyra really just leaves the reader feeling that she is nothing more than her disease as well. I'm not sure if this was intentional but I feel like if her character was more developed, you would feel more for her. Even Corey was lacking personality something that would draw myself to her. I of course felt bad about the situation but wished that I could feel for her more.

I also found the entire situation a little strange and found it hard to beleive that a whole entire town could be so cold/odd. I felt like it was unrealistic due to this fact. I understand that it is a small town isolated from other civilizations and customs would be much different but the entire town's lack of empathy was not only unrealistic but also very strange. 

I think this book could have had a lot of potential and the suspense could have been so much better. The book feels a bit unfinished to me not because there is no ending but because it lacks so much of what a reader wants.

Corey returns to Lost, Alaska, a place she called 'home' for all but the last 7 months of her life, for a previously scheduled trip during her school's spring break.  She was supposed to spend this week with her best friend, Kyra, who promised she would wait for her, promised they would spend the week together, promised she would try.  But days before her flight Corey learns that Kyra was found under the ice of the frozen lake.  That she was lost to her.  Forever.  Corey, instead, returns to mourn her friend and find out what happened.  In doing so, Corey is confronted with a Lost that she doesn't quite recognize and she flounders to understand the changes she sees around her, while finding herself an outsider in a town she still considers her home.  

Corey grapples internally with Kyra's death and struggles to come to terms with the fact that she is really gone, all while faced with a town that seems reluctant to see her friend's death as a tragedy at all.  Corey's confusion and disbelief is highlighted and complemented by the surreal, dream-like quality of the imagery and prose of this novel.  It is a story seen through the eyes of a grieving seventeen year old girl and the grief is a tangible thread woven throughout.  

While reading I wasn't sure what to believe, just as Corey doubts the stories and events that the people of Lost present to her.  I wanted Corey to find the answers she was looking for, but I was afraid that they didn't exist.  Or wouldn't be enough.  But when those answers begin to come to light, the confusion and sense of betrayal only intensified, leaving me feeling as empty and alone as Corey felt.  I feel that Nijkamp deftly brought me on a journey of despair, while leaving me a small trace of hope at the end of it all.

Before I let go was a great book and one word to describe it is WOW. I couldn't put this book down and can't wait to see what she up her sleeve next.

This book just didn't have enough build up in any storyline to keep it interesting. There were too many areas that were set up as if they might be interesting, but by the time the storyline continued I didn't car or had forgotten details to keep it going. I would have enjoyed it more if there were not so many side stories. They just weren't all that interesting.

Unfortunately I wasn't able to read this book before the release date. I will buy the book as soon as I can and review it then. Sorry!

It started off quite well with a plot I was beginning to care about (teenager returns to her hometown in Alaska where her friend has recently died) but then all got a bit weird and I skipped the rest. I find that with YA - I either love the books, or they just annoy me. Sadly this was the latter.

Ah, Alaska: the US state where the people have Canadian accents, can see Russia from their backyards, and have one of the only decent Republicans in the entirety of Congress. (Their senator Lisa Murkowski has been instrumental in stopping ACA repeals, though her general record is spotty and she’s very pro-gun.) You won’t find many YA books set in Alaska and now Before I Let Go joins the small club. It also joins the “books I’m gonna get but never reread” because it’s SO GOOD but omfg I can’t put myself through this book again. MY HEART.

Once upon a time, as this storytelling-focused story might begin a tale, Corey and Kyra were best friends in the microscopic Lost Creek. Then Corey’s family moved to Canada and Corey went away to boarding school. Seven months later, Kyra died when the ice broke on a frozen lake and she fell in. In those seven months, Lost went from considering Kyra a bipolar “danger” to the revered hometown golden girl. Corey doesn’t trust a bit of what she’s hearing, but Lost no longer trusts her. Seven months away is enough time for Corey to become an outsider–and Lost doesn’t take kindly to outsiders. Contemporary, horror, suspense, mystery, something unexplainable–the span of genres in Before I Let Go lends it a multifaceted quality. Though busy at times, it works well and keeps you reading.

If you were worried this would be just another Dead Girl book–one in which the main character’s personal journey is centered entirely on an unknowable dead girl–you will be pleased to know it’s not. Though Lost is obsessed with controlling Kyra’s narrative and Corey tells us of the Kyra she knew, the dearly departed still tells her own story through her letters to Corey and a diary she hid from Lost. Like I said, storytelling-focused story. If you were a fan of Hamilton‘s storytelling theme, Before I Let Go will be your new best friend.

Nijkamp’s chosen setting of tiny Lost Creek, Alaska is brilliantly written and appropriately claustrophobic. It more than fulfills the two needs for such a setting: a sparse town with only a handful of places to be and a small population of recognizable, individual people. My mom grew up in a town like Lost Creek and regularly tells stories about it. The way Corey talks about lost is almost identical to the way Mom talks about her hometown when we visit and she points out all three notable places.

The people of Lost are what gives the novel its tinge of horror and suspense too! They–especially Kyra’s parents–are so determined to protect Kyra’s “legacy” that they unite into a single terrifying entity when Corey opposes them. For God’s sake, they just stood there and watched when the cabin Corey was staying in caught fire and she had to escape through a window. A town and population like this could come right out of a Stephen King novel.

The legacy Lost wants so desperately to protect? Kyra’s painted prophecies. The return of mining work to town via a new investor, specific people and places Corey visits throughout, her own manner of death,… She predicted these and more in her art. It’s not paranormal or magical realism, simply the unexplainable. Among other unexplainable things: WHAT WAS GOING ON WITH AARON’S CABIN?

But the strongest idea at the core of Before I Let Go are deconstructions of “suffering for your art” and the misconceptions surrounding mentally ill creatives. Kyra painted to cope with her bipolar disorder, not to indulge any passion for art. Once Lost discovered her painted prophecies, they came to depend on her only for her art and isolated her in a abandoned spa. Since she only painted during her manic episodes and her medication helped control her moods, they withheld her meds. If the painted visions required she suffered for her art, then so be it. They’d make sure she suffered. She’d already foretold her own death, after all.

Think about some of the mentally ill creatives throughout history, like Sylvia Plath and Ernest Hemingway. Both wrote works of literary genius and both committed suicide when they were relatively young. Had they gotten effective treatment, they may have lived much longer and produced much more work. But would it have been as well-received as the work they made with poor treatment or none at all?

Like the people of Lost, we simply accept the relationship between their work and lack of treatment without much thought. We don’t wonder whether they created due to passion or simply to cope, or how they felt about what they created. A mentally ill creative might make something they dislike or nothing at all with poor/no treatment and only make something they truly love/are passionate about when getting good treatment–or nothing at all if they’re like Kyra and only create to cope. No art is ever worth the suffering of the artist. Them getting treatment is more important than any art they make without it.

Because Lost never thought about any of the above, Kyra died. How many lives have prematurely ended because we didn’t think about any of this either?

Nijkamp’s debut This Is Where It Ends has set a high standard by spending over a year on the New York Times bestseller list, but Before I Let Go has it beat. It’s a deeply layered, moving, and at times terrifying novel I’d teach to high school students if I could stomach teaching. It’s not emotionally easy to read, but you’d be missing brilliance if you skipped out on this visceral reading experience.