I was very disappointed with this book. The cover and the description made it sound amazing, but it fell flat for me. I couldn't relate to any of the characters; they didn't feel like real people to me at all. Their behavior and the decisions they made seemed bizarre and made no sense to me. For example: several residents of the small Alaska town constantly talk about who is an "outsider" and who is "not one of us." This occurs in the flashbacks as well as the current timeline. I'm from a small town and know that this mentality certainly exists, but it's mostly unspoken, or spoken about with euphemisms. I've never heard people actively discussing who is "not one of us"--definitely not as often as these characters do. The dialogue seemed off, especially for the teenage characters. I almost put the book down several times but ultimately kept reading because I was interested in seeing what had happened. However, the conclusion was disappointing to me as well. I can imagine that some teens will enjoy this book, but It had me rolling my eyes from beginning to end and I expect most adult readers will feel the same way.

Corey and Kyra have always been best friends. Living in the tiny town of Lost Creek, Alaska. When Corey's mother moves the family to Canada, Corey promises to come back.

But things like school, a new town, new friends get in the way of the past and by the time Corey returns, it is for Kyra's funeral.

The town is no longer home to Corey. She is now an outsider. She doesn't believe Kyra would have killed herself and no one is giving her any answers. All Kyra wanted was to get out of this town and Corey is going to find out what happened to her and why everyone in town is acting so bizarre.

This book was told from past to present and I am really not sure how I feel about it. Kyra is bi-polar. I find it hard to believe that even in the backwoods of Alaska that having it would be so polarizing that she would be shunned.

This felt more like a ghost story that got way out of hand.

Netgalley/Sourcebooks Fire

Coming off of Nijkamp's initial story, I had high hopes for BEFORE I LET GO. What I got was...a bit of a thematic mess. To be fair, it's a thematic mess that kept me up late to finish, because it does still have the quick pace that Nijkamp established in THIS IS WHERE IT ENDS, but it leaves you a little dazed. The jumping narrative styles are interesting, but I'm not seeing where the purpose was. It's not specific scenes that seem to trigger it, nor characters. The letters and the calls, I can understand. It's the script pieces that don't mesh. There are a lot of fragments of genres in here, and it never solidifies into any one of them enough to explain the oddity that is Lost Creek. If magical realism was the goal, it achieved it--but I wasn't getting that vibe from the book initially. All in all, it's a nice little read, but it could have been so much more.

Corey thought she would be returning to Lost Creek, Alaska after a semester at boarding school to visit her best friend. Instead she's coming for Kyra's funeral. Corey determines to get to the bottom of Kyra's death. But things aren't the same in Lost Creek. Corey is now considered an outsider and no one will talk to her. Meanwhile, the whole town speaks of Kyra with reverent tones. Corey is convinced that something very weird happened while she was gone.

Before I Let Go is such a mind-bender of a book. Marieke Nijamp deals with issues of mental illness, suicide, death, loss, and fitting in through a creepy kind of magical realism.

I’m not really sure how I feel about this book. One the one hand, I was really invested in it. On the other, it’s not particularly the best story I’ve ever read. Nonetheless, it was interesting and I’m happy I read it.

I felt kind if "blah" throughout the book, and the ending was definitely disappointing. I think there were several promising premises but none really delivered.

This book was okay but unfortunately didn't live up to my expectations!😥 I am still intrigued by the author and will check out her other works. I like the cover but the book was just meh/okay to me but I appreciate the opportunity!

My thoughts while reading this book were mostly one simple word: meh. I never really connected with the characters, didn't care about the town or the mystery and thought the writing was choppy and distracting.

It's just such a mediocre book. No scenes stand out, no characters stand out, and at no point did I think, yes, this is worth reading. Everything is so bland, that I've already forgotten the name of the main character and the name of the town.

Marieke Nijkamp is probably simply not the author for me. I read "This is Where it Ends" last year and was similarly underwhelmed by the execution. When I spotted this book on Netgalley, I thought the premise sounded fascinating, otherwise I wouldn't have requested it, but the book just does not deliver.

The style is weird. Nijkamp decided to add random scenes written as a script even though none of the characters have anything to do with film, and it didn't fit.

None of the characters get any development and the mystery turned out to be predictable and boring. A small town in Alaska should be a fascinating setting. Creepy and isolated, you'd think it would be perfect for a mystery, but oh well. On top of that, the plot just wasn't credible. In fact, it all felt a bit off. The only reason I finished this is because I usually finish books I request, and because it's such a short read.

I'm really disappointed I didn't like this better.

Originally, I believed this to be another YA mystery, but <i>Before I Let Go</i> was a lot different than I expected it to be. Corey and Kyra grew up together, best friends in the small town of Lost Creek, Alaska. Seven months ago, Corey’s family moved away, leaving Kyra alone in the town that was unacceptiping of her and her manic episodes due to her bipolar disorder.

Corey gets a phone call that Kyra took her own life and immediately flies back to Lost Creek, only to find that town is completely different in MANY ways.

I had a lot of up and down feelings about this book. While I’m glad the plot focused on someone, particular a teenager struggling with bipolar disorder and depression, the way it was handled obviously ways terrible. I felt as though the ending had a lot more to be desired as well and there were a few plot holes to clear up too. Overall, interesting plot and new take on the genre.

An interesting read that captivated me from the first page. I felt like I was right there with the characters, the writing was gripping and intimate. This story reminded me of Thirteen Reasons Why, so if you’re a fan of that, then I recommend this book.
I really loved the setting of the book, the small winter town in Alaska, and I especially loved the friendship between the two girls, Corey and Kyra. The plot is a devastating one, but it has a valuable lesson for the reader which I appreciated.

Before I Let Go by Marieke Nijkamp takes place in Lost Creek, Alaska. The two main characters are Corey and Kyra. Corey and Kyra are best friends and promise to stay best friends even though Corey moves away.

Shortly before coming home for a visit, Corey receives a call from her mother. The news is devastating. Kyra is dead. She fell through some ice on a lake and drowned. Corey can’t believe it. It doesn’t make sense. It’s January. The lake should be frozen solid.

Corey heads back to Lost Creek to stay with the Henderson’s (Kyra’s parents.) What she finds is confusing and puzzling. The town seems to have embraced Kyra while Corey was gone. Not only did they embrace Kyra, but they seem to be pushing Corey away. Not wanting to answer her questions.

The book is both mysterious and puzzling. At times it even reads like a thriller, with sinister undertones. It is told in a random sort of way, with flashbacks of Corey and Kyra’s relationship, letters that Kyra wrote Corey, and events currently happening.

I like the book and enjoyed the unique storyline.

I received an ARC of the book.

Thank you for the advanced reading of this book.

Ok so the description of the book sounds great and full of twists and turns. Great my kind of read. However this book was not as exciting as it sounds. i was lost a few times on where the story was going. I found that it didnt go anywhere. this book I gave a 2 star because im just not fully happy with how it was written. I do feel that this author has great ideas and she thinks outside the box. I love how she tried to write about mental illness which not many do.

I received a free ecopy of this book in return for an honest review. Many thanks to @netgalley and the publisher for the opportunity.

Before I Let Go is one of those hard to classify stories. It presents, initially, as a mystery but if you go into it looking for a string of clues and a race to beat the author to a solution you are destined for disappointment. It’s not that kind of book. It is, however, a beautiful and poignant story about different kinds of loss.

At the outset, Corey, who has moved away from the town of Lost Creek, hears that the best friend she left behind, Kyra, has died in an apparent suicide. Not believing this, Corey gets on a plane, ostensibly heading back for the memorial, but actually wanting to investigate the events leading to Kyra’s death. On arrival, Corey finds the town and its people to be very different than she remembered.

There are eerie supernatural occurrences that at times can be unnerving to the reader. Thrown into the mix are some alternative sexualities and the treatment of people with mental health issues.

What struck a chord with me was that feeling of going back somewhere, knowing you have changed but not expecting that they will have too. That shock feeling of realising that people and places have moved on without you. It had a feeling of loss of innocence. People Corey trusted as a child now appear threatening.

I felt that in some respects this book failed to live up to its promise, some story threads lacked explanation, some themes weren’t fully explored but this was a book that pulled me in and wouldn’t let go. I lost some sleep finishing it. If you can set aside your expectations and let the story flow you will be rewarded with some beautiful writing.

Mixed Feelings

I went into this optimistic. It just missed the mark for me. It was not bad. It was not written badly. It just didn't work. It had an important message that I really do hope reaches people.
What I did like was the unsettled feeling I had about the town. It was sort of creepy and mysterious. It built anticipation.
The bad: I was left with so many unanswered questions. To many.


Thank you, NetGalley, for the ARC

Thank you to netgalley.co.uk for the free copy in exchange for an honest review.

First of all, I feel like I must warn readers that this book deals with some pretty weighty topics but I believe the writing dealt with it, the writing was easy to read and made the tough subjects a little easier to read. However, the reason I gave the book three stars because I was left feeling disappointed in the characters and their development. In my opinion, for a book that dealt with mental illness issues, the character development didn't feel right throughout the book. However, I thought it was a unique book.

This tells the story of Corey and best friend Kyra. Corey moves away from the small town they grew up in Alaska. Corey promises to return in the summer. A few days before that happens, Kyra dies suddenly. Corey makes her way back to the small town to uncover what actually happened to her best friend. This book was gripping and it had me turning the pages. Kyras bipolar disorder was accurately portrayed. It gives you room to think about mental illness and the misconceptions surrounding it. I would definitely recommend this book. I have found other books more gripping as this started off a bit slow but I think its a great read..

I had a really hard time sticking with this book. I could never really get invested in the characters of Corey and Kyra. While I appreciate the author's attempt to explore friendships affected by mental disorders, specifically bi-polar, I was left feel unsatisfied with the plot.

THE BOOK
Best friends Corey and Kyra were inseparable in their snow-covered town of Lost Creek, Alaska. When Corey moves away, she makes Kyra promise to stay strong during the long, dark winter, and wait for her return.

Just days before Corey is to return home to visit, Kyra dies. Corey is devastated―and confused. The entire Lost community speaks in hushed tones about the town's lost daughter, saying her death was meant to be. And they push Corey away like she's a stranger.

Corey knows something is wrong. With every hour, her suspicion grows. Lost is keeping secrets―chilling secrets. But piecing together the truth about what happened to her best friend may prove as difficult as lighting the sky in an Alaskan winter...

MY THOUGHTS
This was my first book by this author, and I really enjoyed it. I'm not sure how to categorize this. Maybe a young adult coming of age thriller? Regardless, it was a great read. I've never read a story like this. It's told in pieces, but not in a way that leaves us straining to figure out the timeline, though. It was well done. If you enjoy an engaging storyline in YA fiction, then this is the book for you.

Hello people of the internet!!! On today’s ‘Monday Memos’ we’re going to review a new book by New York Times Bestselling Author Marieke Nijkamp. You may recognize Marlene’s name due to the popularity of her 2016 debut book ‘This Is Where It Ends’, as well as the editor of the anthology Unbroken: 13 Stories Starting Disabled Teens which will be released in the fall of 2018. Today we have the privilege of reviewing her latest book ‘Before I Let Go’, which was released on January 2, 2018 and was provided for review by Sourcebooks Fire. This will be a spoiler free review however I will discuss how the ending affected my opinion of the book. So now let’s get to the review. Ready? Ok, let’s go!!!

‘Before I Let Go’ is a Young Adult suspense novel surrounding the suicide of a bi-polar young teenage girl name Kyra in the small town of Lost, Alaska. When Kyra’s best friend Corey returns to Lost after moving away for several months, she begins to realize that the town is very different than she remembered. Corey is shocked to find that she is now treated like an outsider by people who have known her for her entire life, and feels that there is an aura of secrecy surrounding the town. However the thing that Corey finds the most shocking is the fact that everyone in town speaks very highly and lovingly of Kyra, despite the fact that Corey always saw that everyone in town mercilessly tease and abused Kyra her entire life. Corey begins to suspect that there is more to Kyra’s death than what she has been lead to believe, so she decides to investigate the story herself. Throughout the story Corey finds out dark secrets about the town and herself that she had never considered before. Corey also finds that she has enemies and allies in the town that will play an important role in uncovering the truth.

So now we’ve reached the point in the review where I tell y’all if you should buy this book or not. Honestly, this book is a little difficult to recommend because it was a solid 5 star read until I reached the ending of the book. Now this book does have some problems throughout, such as the fact that Corey is not a very likeable protagonist because of the way she treated Kyra after she moved (which is made even worst by how mentally ill Kyra is, and the fact that Corey knows this but still treats her this way). The book also contains several pages where the writing suddenly changes to a script style (like a play would have) which was really jarring and completely unnecessary to the story because it didn’t tie in with anything. However a positive point of this book is that we do get to see a lot of diversity with the inclusion of asexual, pansexual, and homosexual characters, as well as a very detailed accounting of Kyra’s mental illness that helps us really understand and fall in love with her character. The author truly does an amazing job of pulling you into the mystery of Lost and keeping you engaged throughout every twist & turn that comes our way. Unfortunately this is all ruined by the ending of the book. As soon as Corey solves the mystery we reach the climax of the book and then the story just ends. It does not resolve, it just ends. After all of the build up and great storytelling that the author does, this ending is just so disappointing that it honestly ruined the whole experience of the book for me. Because of this, I have to give this book a solid 2.5 smiley faces out of 5, which truly saddens me to do because this story deserved so much more.

I’m not sure what to say about Before I Let Go. I’m confused by it, I’m stunned by it, I’m frightened of it.

Nihkamp’s story is a twisty one that seems simple—a girl returns to her home town to mourn her recently deceased friend—but it’s so much more. It’s a meditation on love, on the nature of grief, but most of all, it’s an examination of stories themselves. The ones we build for ourselves and others.

I can’t say I loved the book—the characters aside from Corey and Lyra were very flat and one-dimensional. I get that the two girls were the protagonists, but I didn’t care at all about any other characters. But, I’ll be on the lookout for Nijkamp’s next work: her ability to evoke atmosphere and to drive home a poignant message resonated with me.

I received an ebook copy of Before I Let Go from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.