Cover Image: Before I Let Go

Before I Let Go

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Member Reviews

Dear Publisher,
thank you for sending me this book. I read it, but i couldn't finish it. I had high expectations from this author, and the book wasn't that bad, but in reading the story i didn't felt what i was supposed to feel. The chapters set in the present were few, most of them were set in the past or were letters or phone calls. The fact that I couldn't get to the end of the story was because indeed in the plot I didn't really felt like an attraction to the story. I hate to use this adjective with books, but most of the time, for me, it was boring. I couldn't get to the end because I was expecting much more from this book. But maybe, who knows, one day i can even give it another shot, I really want to get to the end of Carey and Kyra's story.

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I was given an advanced copy through Netgalley for my review. I would highly recommend this book to family and friends and will buy a copy for myself.

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Before I Let Go is a book I couldn’t wait to start reading after seeing the blurb but unfortunately it fell very short of my expectations.
The story is told from Corey’s viewpoint but I didn’t really get a grip on who she really was I know she came back to Lost Creek as her best friend had died, Kyra, I also know she moved away to go to a sport school, she’s afraid of the dark, wants to be an astrologer but much more than that I do not know and this is where the story falls short. Lost Creek is a very small Alaskan village that snows a lot, again apart from that I know nothing more. Kyra could have had so much more depth to her character especially as she was a depressed individual.
The story was confusing I still don’t really understand what happened and it could have been so good. The timelines bounced around a lot the characters weren’t developed enough leading to a what the heck’s happening on every page. Unfortunately this wasn’t for me.
I would like to thank Netgalley and Sourcebooks Fire for this ARC I received in exchange for an honest review.

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Before I Let Go is a tragic story about regret. The characters live in a small town with unique norms that I found hard to fully understand (never having lived in a small town). But I did relate to love, loss, regret, stereotypes, and people who see the world differently than I do. Marieke Nijkamp is so descriptive that the reader can visualize events as they are occurring. I highly recommend Before I let Go.

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I really enjoyed this book and the creepy vibes it gave me! The setting was really creepy and I was on the edge of my seat wondering what would happen! I haven't read a book by her before and this book really makes me want to read it! I appreciated that this book was able to be told in a different way but didn't make you confused with how it was told. I mean sometimes you're reading a thriller and things get so confusing you don't know what you're reading. And I everything is all over the place, but I think this book did a great job by not going down that direction, but I will say I was left with questions that I felt were never answered! I kept wanting to go on with this story, and I appreciate the author for writing a story that keeps us interested and wanting to find out more of what is happening. Overall it was a good novel! Highly recommend!

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Overall it is a good book but there are some parts that felt forced. I liked the overall theme, but as a teenager there were some parts of the dialogue that felt fake.

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I honestly don’t even know where to start with this book. I was keen to read Before I Let Go for two main reasons. The first being that it had an asexual main character, and the second being that it was a mystery/thriller. I guess I’ll address both of these aspects right now.

Corey is definitely ace – there was a chapter where she went into a little bit of depth about how she didn’t really feel attracted to people and had no interest in kissing etc. Later in the chapter, there’s a flashback where Corey and Kyra are looking up queer identities and Corey says that asexual felt right for her. Though, there’s no doubt that Corey is aromantic, as well. She talks about not ever having crushes, and not ever feeling like she could give Kyra the romantic love that Kyra felt for her. I thought it strange that Corey was able to find asexual but not aromantic when she and Kyra did their searching. However, I did find an interview with the author that does confirm that Corey is aro, and states that she’s still figuring stuff out:

I do imagine Corey is aro as well. She's just on the cusp of figuring out her own identity though, and asexual is the first word she comes across. The first time she feels recognized. I imagine she'll go on to fine-tune it and figure out what fits her best, but she isn't quite there yet.

So this book definitely had ace rep going on but since Corey’s aro-ness was never explored – there’s not even a hint as to whether or not she’s even figuring it out or simply thinks being ace covers how she feels in both areas – I had mixed feelings.

On to the mystery/thriller aspect. Of which there was… none. So Corey flies back to her old little home town after her best friend, Kyra, dies. Corey thinks that there’s something amiss around Kyra’s death, and she’s right – there is. But we never really find out what. I’ve tagged this book as paranormal because there was this weird introduction of prophecy by painting, where everything that Kyra painted came to life. And this creepy little town made her paint everything they ever wanted. And when she started painting her own death they were just okay with it because whatever she paints has to come true.

If you’re like ??? after reading that paragraph, you should be. I read the entire book and I’m still feeling ??? about the whole thing, to be honest. There’s no hint in the blurb that this book would take a weird, magical twist and even as I was reading it I was wondering if it was really magical or if these people were making the things happen themselves and just imagining it was Kyra’s paintings making the changes. I guess that could be the point but instead of it feeling mysterious it just felt weird.

Before I Let Go is a strange book because Corey was supposed to adore Kyra but when she moved town she almost immediately cut off all contact with her. I felt like Corey’s behaviour when she came back to Lost Creek was a little sanctimonious considering that she wasn’t there for Kyra, just like the rest of the town wasn’t. So I found it a little hard to buy into Corey’s heartbreak when she was fine with Kyra not existing in her life when she was actually, you know, alive. And besides that, their relationship was just a lot of conversations about Kyra’s BPD and stars and getting out of the town. I wanted so much more from them.

All in all, Before I Let Go was not what I was expecting. The story dragged on a lot because most of the book was Corey’s internal monologue about Kyra (most of which was repetitive), the mystery aspect was incredibly weird, and even though there were discussions about mental health and not being defined by your diagnosis there was actually not much more to Kyra’s character other than her diagnosis.

© 2018, Chiara @ Books for a Delicate Eternity. All rights reserved.

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I loved this book. Creepy, atmospheric. I really enjoyed reading it, and it kept me thinking about it when I had to put it down to do things. I love the layout of the book, the short chapters, feeding the information through and then slamming you with a well put line - I would heartily recommend this to anyone.
I read it in the height of a heatwave, and the detail and description still gave me the chills.

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Unfortunately I didn't enjoy this book. I wasn't connected to the main characters. It was very scattered, cliche, repetitive.

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I received this book from the publisher via Net Galley in exchange for an honest review.

I went into this expecting a thriller and it sort of is, but it’s also not. It’s creepy and atmospheric (goosebump inducing), and does that real life cross over with hints of supernatural, where you’re not quite sure where it’s going - I quite like that! I liked that you don’t really ever get that element explained, either.

The town of Lost is so creepy and very small town minded, Corey is already an outsider despite being born there and only being gone 7 months.

I’d have liked to have seen more of Corey and Kyra’s friendship and their acceptance of each other (especially away from Kyra’s diagnosis), but I did like what we got. Kyra’s illness was a hard subject to me - I liked her stance on it and hated everyone else’s, and even Corey was problematic about it.

I also love the lgbt+ rep, especially the asexual rep! It was a little bit lip service, but it did feel that Corey also managed to convey enough of it to feel real. And not like it’s too relevant to the story.

The only other thing about it to mention is that a handful of segments are written as if it’s a play or film script and I totally didn’t understand that at all.

But overall I really enjoyed it, more than I thought I would.

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Thank you to NetGalley and Marieke Nijkamp for allowing me to read and review Before I Let Go. Unfortunately I didn't enjoy this book, or the writing style.

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Just couldn't get into the book. The plot was not very interesting and I have too many other books that are well written that I need to read.

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After only a few months away, Corey returns to Lost Creek when she hears of her best friend's death. What she doesn't expect is to be treated like an outsider by the rest of the tiny, close knit town. People she once thought of as family, no longer want her around when she starts questioning what happened to Kyra. Though she is told that Kyra fell through the ice on the lake, Corey suspects there is something more to it from the start. With all the spooky things that happen around Corey, and the powers Kyra seems to have had through her painting, the story gets more and more mysterious the longer she is there.
I couldn't believe it when the book finished and I couldn't even move for a few moments! I expected a lot more from the ending, yet I think it was actually enough.
I read this book as part of my preparation for YALC as I saw the author would be there. I'm so glad I put it to the top of my reading pile, I enjoyed it so much!

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I didn't fully realise the context of this book before reading it and found it wasn't for me. I can recognise that it was well written but not a story I'd recommend personally.

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My hopes were high when I read about this book, mystery, betrayal, set in Alaska. What's not to love? The last frontier, filled with possibilities to keep the pages turning. My hopes were dashed. This book ran in different directions that made the plot confusing. The storyline couldn't make up its mind what it was about. The behavior and actions of the Lost community was perplexing. Why support a teen suicide and threaten to harm the victims best friend. Then, the book ended. Lost in Lost.

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Before I Let Go is a novel that explores bipolar, friendship, mental health awareness, sexuality issues and Alaska. I learned so much while reading Before I Let Go. One of the main characters in this novel has bipolar, This mental illness is not well regulated with meds in this case. She is shunned in the town she lives in due to this disease and the manic and depressive states that it causes. Kyra, the 17 year old with bipolar, has one friend that is her entire support system. At the beginning of the novel something has happened to Kyra. Her one friend, Corey, is told what happened. Corey has been forced to leave Alaska because her mother has a new job. Corey returns to Alaska for five days to explore what has happened. I just finished reading this book yesterday and I am still thinking about it. I learned quite a bit about bipolar and also the state of Alaska. I do think that the ending of the novel was a bit unrealistic but I did enjoy reading it and I would recommend it to others. I want to thank the publisher and net galley for giving me this novel to read in exchange for a fair and honest review.

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Before I Let Go is an interesting story about a town called Lost that loses its way. When Corey returns to this remote Alaskan community what she finds is strange and disturbing and difficult to believe. Set during early spring in northern Alaska when things are still dark and easily lost the somber tone of the novel is disturbing as the answers Corey seeks prove to be dangerous to find. Keeps your attention throughout with short easy to read chapters.

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The case of the book that couldn't decide what it was. A mental health study. A supernatural look at prophecy. A study on grief and loss in the teen years. Learning to thrive in Alaska. I had such high hopes for this book purely based on the author's writing style and the fact that there was so much gripping build up, page turning suspense, spooky atmosphere, right up until the moment......that nothing happened. No closure, and not even in the you guess your own ending kind of way, but the kind of way where it just ended. Probably one of the most unsatisfying books I've read this year. So much potential just to go from a sprint to a face plant at the end.

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I love thrillers, mystery, suspense, and books that use a little magic to move the plot along. I thought BEFORE I LET GO would smash all of those things. Unfortunately, it just seemed to sort of nudge and run away, leaving me feeling a little disappointed.

While the premise of the book was interesting and had a lot of promise, the execution fell flat. As a reader, I'm used to suspending disbelief in order to appreciate a story but this one had glaring plot holes and characters that just behaved the way no actual human would. Without giving too much away, I couldn't believe that Corey never once wondered to herself or asked anyone why they suddenly believed what they believed about Kyra. In the 7 months she was gone, what changed? How did everything begin?

It felt like the author was trying to do too much for her writing ability. She tried to create a creepy town, a mysterious death, friendships, and then threw in "I'm asexual, she's pansexual, and those two boys are gay". I love Queer literature when it's done right, but the quick "I'm asexual because I don't like to kiss" almost made me quit reading this book.

This just wasn't a satisfying read. I'm generally ok with being left with questions but when the questions are "Why wouldn't she tell her mom that someone tried to murder her??", I have to shake my head.

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This arc was provided to me for free from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

2.5 Stars

This is going to be a very confusing review because I don’t know what I just read. I can’t put it fully into words to describe this book. I was nervous picking this up because I wasn’t a big fan of the author's previous work, This Is Where It Ends. But I wanted to give it a shot because it looked like a type of YA Thriller. But unfortunately, it wasn’t for me.

This book follows Corey who has moved away from Lost Creek, Alaska and left her best friend, Kyra behind. Right before Corey comes back for a visit, she gets word that Kyra has died. Corey goes back regardless to Lost Creek to get answers but she is treated like an outsider and she discovers that the town of Lost Creek is holding deadly secrets.

This book had the potential to be a good thriller type of book, but it didn’t live up to my expectations. The characters weren’t interesting in the slightest, in fact, Corey irritated me to no end. You get glimpses of Kyra through confusing flashbacks and we see how lost and alone she really was because of her bipolar disorder. The author handled her illness pretty decently and it’s nice to see that kind of representation in books. But the characters lacked so much, the plot was just incredibly frustrating, and there are so many questions I have.


While this book left me disappointed, it still captured my attention throughout the whole thing. Which is exactly what the author's previous book did. May not be my cup of tea, but the author sure does know how to pull you in and not let you go.

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