*Free ARC for Honest Review*
Thank you Publisher and Author
I Give this Book 3 Stars
I liked this book, I understood some areas in the Japanese culture but others left me scrabbling the figure out what the heck happened. The emotional buildup and how they supported each other was pretty good but somewhat annoyed at the snappiness in parts, I don't usually cling to books that make me tear up but I kept reading. There was some trigger areas for me with the parenting.
Despite the intimacy being very tame, the characters are really good and go well together.

No rating, DNF. I picked up the book because of the cover and the ace characters. I have read a few of Cullinan's books and usually enjoy them. But...cultural fetishization and some problematic ace rep did not work for me. I pulled the plug before 50% and don't plan to finish it.

This book, y'all. This book is absolutely awful.

When I first heard about Antisocial, I was excited. A m/m book with an gray-ace character that also had an aroace non-binary side character? It sounded wonderful. It's almost impossible to find m/m romance (or just romance in general) with ace characters, let alone a m/m romance with more than an ace character, with one of them being aro. If ace characters are rare in romance, arospec characters are freaking unicorns, and so are non-binary characters (aroace non-binary characters then!)

So yeah, I was excited.

But it all melted away when I read Xan's review of it. And Daniela's. And Annie's. The book I wanted so much to read was a mess when it came to Japanese culture and the ace rep and the nonbinary rep. At this point I had already got an ARC from Netgalley, so I threw my hopes out of the window and braced myself to read the book just so I could write an accurate review of it. I was expecting something bad.

I got something awful.

The way this book portrays and treats Japanese culture is absolutely disgusting. I've never read something so blatant fetishizing. Antisocial is set in a fictional university called Benten that was funded by American "admirers" of Japanese culture. Just that would be iffy, but there is no Japanese or Japanese-American character in this story and all of the important/major characters are white. And what is worse, they are all weaboos. For real. I understand admiring & enjoying Japanese culture because I grew up watching anime and reading manga and even tried to learn Japanese at some point (I still kinda want to, one day) but there is a line between admiring something and fetishzing it and this book is absolutely fetishizing Japanese culture.

Some examples:

Something inside Xandder snapped - he could almost see it, and it was a tiny, red-hot rubber hand. "Hai. Take off your clothes, all of them, Skylar-san, onegaishimasu." When Skylar only stared at him, he clapped his hands twice. "Hayaku."


"I think I'd appreciate your skivvies." Skylar cleared his throat. "And...a sock for myself. Ku..Kud..."
"Kudasai."
"A sock, kudasai."


"Do you know what I wish?" Skylar held Xander's hand tight as he looked up at the falling leaves. "I wish we could stand like this in Japan, under real chery trees. Ones in bloom."
"We have real cherry trees in the United States, you know."
"The ones in Japan feel more real, somehow."
Xander smiled. "Then let's make it a vow. Someday we'll stand under cherry blossoms in Japan."
Skylar smiled back, and there was only weariness, no more shadows in his face now. "It's a promise."


Skylar and Xander have absolutely no reason ever to speak Japanese. They only do it because they are both anime & manga fans that love the Japan of animes and mangas, so it's somehow "meaningful" to them to say the most unnecessary shit in Japanese from time to time (at some point one calls the other "my sakura", I kid you not). What's worse, sometimes they speak Japanese to each other in kinda sensual and even sexual moments, again just because. Japanese language is an adornment for them, to use when they want to say something "special".

Japanese language, culture and religion are used in this book just to further the main characters' romance and development. Japan itself is portrayed as some kind of mystical land where both Xander and Skylar can find happiness (spoiler, but they actually finish the book by going to teach English in Japan) and where everything is cooler just because it's Japanese. There is no substance to anything Japanese in this story. Everything is used in the most fetishzing, disgusting way possible.

And it's not a small thing. Japanese culture & language is embeded in the premise of Antisocial. There is no way this book could exist without it and without exploiting it. In the first 20/30% or so I was like, "ok, this is bad, but I guess I can keep going" but it only got worse from there. The second half of the story mistreats Japanese culture so much it actually became painful to read. And like, the book tries to acknowledge how nonsensical the whole thing is. Keyword: tries.

[...] but mostly the college was a bunch of rich white people, a handful of people of color, and an explosion of Japanese culture that made no sense when you looked at it from the outside.


The excerpt seems like a poor attempt at recognizing how weeaboo the only thing is, but it's right in the beginning and the way the white main characters (one of whom is filthy rich) engage with Japanese culture is never challenged or questioned. It feels a lot like trying to save face.

"But Ren, what about the ace rep?" you might be asking and well, that's complicated. I expected it to be awful and it was, but not as much as I thought it would be (small miracles, I guess?), partly because I related to some of it. I'm grayace myself, though I usually just say I'm ace. Though Skylar's grayasexuality is nothing like mine, I related to some of his reactions. Puking after you kinda come out to someone? Sadly, something I probably would have done as well. It kinda reminded me of when my uni's seniors made us freshmen (is that how both are called in English? Well) tell, half joking (my course is relatively queer-friendly), what our orientation was. I was at the back of the class and panicked because if they asked me, I wasn't sure of how I would react, if I would say I was straight or risk coming out as aroace to ~50 students, most if not all of which had never heard about asexuality and aromanticism before. I just puke on their feet, probably. Just like Skylar. So I fled.

So yeah, I understand what's like to be nervous about coming out as ace (and aro) and I didn't find any fault in how Skylar's reaction to his coming out or to how he dealt with internalized acemisia. Everything else, though... Well, it was shitty.

First, the split attraction model. Now, some aces and aros and, well, people in general, don't use it and that's fine. But Skylar doesn't even seem to know it exists, which is kinda weird for an acespec person who dug enough info on asexuality to know it was a thing. He never questions his romantic orientation, never gives a hint that for him romantic and sexual attraction are the same thing/that he doesn't need or want the split attraction model, never explores his identity. Even Zelda, the aroace non-binary character, is a poor attempt at giving Skylar a community. He doesn't have one. He doesn't look for one. He doesn't even or say that he doesn't need one. It's like the ace community doesn't exist in this book. And no, I'm not saying that he should have gone to ace meetings or whatever, but honestly? Most aces look for a community when we figure out that we ace because we spent our whole lives wondering what the hell was wrong. Skylar wondered the same, but since he had Xander, all was well.

Which brings us to the second problem with the ace rep in this book: Xander is the allo savior of this story.

Now, I'm all for allo characters who respect the boundaries of their ace partners (in fact, I want more of that in all genres), but Xander goes beyond that in Antisocial. He has the instinct of not trying to kiss Skylar (really?) and while Skylar is chest deep in his internalized acemisia he gets out of it because Xander loves him. That's it.

Trying to explore his identity? Connecting with members of the ace community? Trying to work through his internalized acemisia? Trying to understand why it exists in the first place and why he has so much of it? Nah. Why, when you have a hot guy who loves you?

And this is my problem with the ace rep in Antisocial. It's for allo readers who want an ace character who hates himself but gets better through the love of his hot boyfriend. It's not for ace readers in the end. In a way, it's own different kind of fetishzing.

Also, it's kinda... bad that Xander thinks this at some point:

Man looked. Whether they were dating or not, looking for a partner or not - they looked. It wasn't cheating or offensive, or it wasn't intended to be. It simply was. Xander would lie in hot coals for one kiss from Skylar, one brush of his fingertips on his naked chest, but if the right guy walked by post-workout without a shirt, it would take willpower not to steal a glance and file images away for the spank bank.


Because:

1. That's the kind of thinking that makes ace men hate themselves. See: Skylar.
2. That's freaking ridiculous to think when you KNOW some men are ace.
3. That's freaking ridiculous to think because even some men who are not ace don't look or only think about sex all the time.
4. Ace men are men. Why is the super accepting allo partner going on about how men just will look right before thinking that the MAN he has a crush on doesn't?
5. I know generalizations can work in some cases. This is not one of them.

The idea the all men think about sex all the time or will look at someone they find hot because they can't help themselves is one of the reasons ace boys and men are so mistreated by literally everyone. Being a man and being sexual are deeply linked, and when you are one but not the other society will come for your head. But that's bullshit. Being or not being sexual doesn't make anyone less of a man and it'd be nice if we stopped spreading this idea everywhere, especially in a book about an ace man. Seriously.

I had no strong feelings about how Zelda, the non-binary character, was portrayed. It got a bit tiring that their anger/social justiceness (so to speak) was mostly only tolerated by everyone else. They felt a bit like a caricature, to be honest.

Now on to my petty complaint: Xander is an artists who strongly dislikes digital art because it "just doesn't feel the same". Early in the book he mentions that it feels weird to draw on a tablet while looking at the PC/laptop and I was like, "well display tablets exist?" because honestly. And well, way after a character shows him a display tablet and he is just awed. It was such a ridiculous thing to read. I mean, does the author really wants me to believe an artist who has been drawing for years knows about graphic tablets but not about display tablets? Right. Because that is believable.

In conclusion, Antisocial could have been a strong story that I could have loved. It's my kind of book, being low on the sexual content and having characters that actually have conflicts that interest me. But since it's full of fetishzing bullshit and shitty ace rep, I'm not here for it or for any of Heidi Cullinan's books from now on. 1.0 star.

PS: Acemisia = acephobia = anti-ace bigotry.

PSS: I'm looking for reviews of this book by Japanese readers, Japanese-Americans, all descendants of Japanese included, to link in this review. If you've written one, please let me know in the comments! I would love to boost your review!

This was a very touching story.

I couldn't believe that Antisocial is the first book I've read by Heidi Cullinan. I actually have several of her books on my ereader – I just haven't made time to read them yet. I met Heidi at the RWA charity book signing in Orlando in July 2017 and purchased a paperback copy of Antisocial for my keeper shelf. At the time, I didn't know that the digital copy was available for review on NetGalley. When I saw the book there I snapped it up so I wouldn't have to read the paperback and can instead keep it in pristine condition for my signed book collection.

I absolutely loved this book. The story centers around two seniors in college who very gradually build a relationship with each other. Skyler, a business major, is helping Xander, an art student, market his senior project/art show. I read a lot of M/M books but this one was very different from anything else I've ever read and it was wonderful to read.

This story really has no sex in it (unusual for an M/M story) but it is a beautiful love story and a story of two young men discovering themselves and figuring out how they can stay true to what they want and not what everyone else expects of them. It's a powerful story of friendship and love and I'm so happy I read it.

I read a lot of books so it's takes something special to stick with me long term – this is a "sticky" book for me. Thank you for writing such a wonderful story Ms. Cullinan.

I saw the cover that makes the guys look like manga characters & I ignored that sign. I should have known better. But I wanted to give this book a benefit of a doubt because there were so many positive reviews! So many people loved the romance! So I thought "hey, maybe that cover will make sense in the end". It doesn’t. It only gets worse from there.

It gets so bad I actually stopped reading at 65% because I just couldn’t take it anymore.

I probably would be able to overlook all the other flaws I found in this one if it wasn’t for my biggest issue - the fetishisation of Japanese culture. The main point of this book, the thing that it couldn’t exist without at all are indeed the references to Japanese culture. It’s everywhere: in the setting, in the way the characters interact, in the plotlines. It’s rooted in the book so deeply, it would fall apart without it. So this is a story about students at a made-up college but the catch is - it’s a college founded by a Japanese culture “admirers”. The town’s name is fictional - Takaketo - and don’t quote me on this but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t actually mean anything. It just vaguely sounds Japanese. There are hidden shrines on campus! The uni publishes a manga that our main character draws! (A manga drawn by an American, in America… So not actually a manga at all.) Both Xander & Skylar love manga and anime and have some interest in Japanese culture but it’s extremely superficial. There are no Japanese characters! The only one was a late husband of Xander’s landlady and she, an American, is the one “teaching” about the culture she so clearly knows everything about. Listen, I say this from a perspective of a white woman who is interested in Japan, took classes on some aspects of its culture and history at uni, studied Japanese for a few years - and even from where I’m standing, this is just gross. They pick and choose from the culture as it pleases them. Xander & Skylar randomly speak Japanese in times of distress or as some kind of romantic gesture but keep in mind only Xander ever took any Japanese lessons. And they don’t have whole conversation in another language, no, they just tuck in a word or two at the end of their very english sentences. Or just use Japanese to say “I’m sorry” because what? It’s more meaningful that way? They also think of their relationship in terms of anime a lot which is just honestly weird. It’s straight up fetishisation and even as someone with very little ties to Japan, it made me uncomfortable.

Listen, you wanna write a book appreciating Japanese culture? Make your main characters Japanese, set the whole thing in Japan, find literally any reason other than “it’s kinda cute”. But making your character say things like “Arakawa-sensei”? Not the way. God, even if this was a Japanese book, sensei would be translated into English! Another country’s culture is not a prop to make your story more interesting! There are teens on the internet, first discovering anime, who behave this way & I can excuse them, based on their age, but an adult, a published author? A big fat no from me.

There’s also the fact of asexuality being one of the most important themes of the book. One of our main characters is a gray ace and the book is pretty much his journey to become comfortable with himself. It ticked me the wrong way a lot of the time but personally I’m nowhere on the spectrum so I’d rather not give opinions. There are a few reviews by actual members of the community so check those out instead! What I will say though is that Xander hears this voice in his head. A voice that tells him how to handle Skylar, how to act around him and it’s the opposite of what his desires and instinct tell him. Still, his friend Zelda actually calls this voice an instinct. What I would call it is some fucked up “ace superpower”. Because of course Xander can’t be anything less than the knight in shining armor, accepting Skylar as he is, demanding nothing & basically being a gift from heaven. The only one on earth.

You worry that both main characters are white? Don’t fret! There is a chronically ill Latina who is in maybe 3 scenes & a poor black guy who chose this uni because he saw Obama speak at campus. Two whole poc that are basically just names and a lousy story. Now doesn’t that make you feel better about the representation!

Onto the less important stuff!! If this was a fic, I wouldn’t have read more than a few paragraphs. You know how with fics you just know when the writing isn’t right for you? Well this was a case of that but I kept thinking it’s a book so slightly different rules apply, maybe it will get better over time. It didn’t. The writing is just… not very good. All the descriptions are way too detailed - like, come on! I really don’t need to know he washed his bowl after eating instant ramen! - and they’re not written interestingly enough, aren’t funny or charming or surprising enough that you can overlook this. And it doesn’t get better with dialogues. If anything, it only get worse. Honestly, it feels like the author has never actually met a young person. They all speak in whole speeches and use words and phrases like "congruent" or "vastly different" or "wet dream". I mean. Seriously? They don’t act like 21-year-olds either. For the love of god, one of them admits he can’t look up manga translations online without getting a virus. And has a phone with a stylus! That he actually uses! Which brings me right to my next point.

Are you sure this book is set in 2017? Because there are references to the last presidential elections & we can’t draw any other conclusion. But then we have a smartphone with a stylus. And another character’s flip phone? Like where would he even get one?! Xander is also apparently named after Buffy’s Xander but he’s 21 years old and Buffy started airing in March of 1997 so unless this is set in the future… They also mention DeviantART which I’m pretty sure no one has used since like 2007 but okay. How hard is it to make some proper research?

This book is praised as a romance and yeah, those parts of the story are pretty okay. The two main characters are well developed and I would actually really like them in a different book. One that isn’t gross and doesn’t make me wanna punch people.

DNF at 22%. No rating on the blog/GR.

One  of the things I decided was that I would not force myself to finish a book I wasn't interested in reading anymore. My interest in Antisocial was negative 100 by the time I decided to call it quits. I don't know a nice or pretty way to say that this book is bad. Because it is.

From the first page on this fetishizes Japanese culture.

"The legend, as Xander had been told, was that in the 1870s a group of rich, eccentric friends from New York toured Asia and fell in love with Japan. They came home full of half-baked Shinto beliefs and a passion to start a Japanese revolution in the US."

There's a quote in there which actually sums it up quite nicely:

"...but mostly the college was a bunch of rich white people, a handful of people of color, and an explosion of Japanese culture that made no sense when you looked at it from the outside."

There is no Japanese character in this, except for the dead husband of one of the teachers. And that doesn't count because he has been dead for a while. Plus you don't get cookies for the token Japanese character. Apart from that all characters are white, but somehow everyone is thinks themselves to be an expert on Japan and Japanese culture. This is highly problematic.

Additional to the fetishiziation of Japanese culture we have an instance where being depressed is being compared to being antisocial. And just a page later Stockholm Syndrome is being compared to not wanting to work together on a school project. See quotes below:

"He's a gifted artists, but he's reaching Van Gogh levels of antisocial temperament."

Van Gogh wasn't antisocial, he was depressed and ended up taking his own life. Being depressed and antisocial are NOT the same thing.

"Also it was clear he was having some kind of Stockholm Syndrome over Skylar because of their forced contact due to their projects."

Those things mentioned above where the last straw for me. I had only been reading because I (as an asexual person) wanted to see what the ace-rep was like. Though judging from the things mentioned above I think I really don't want to read how the author handled the asexuality. I had enough after the first 22% and just couldn't keep reading any more of it.

If you're looking for a review that also talks about the ace rep I suggest you read Ela's review. She talks about the ace rep from an asexual point of view. Also read this review as well. There's more about what the trans/nb rep in this book, the fetishization of Japan and the ace rep are like.

Not recommended.

Instead check out Blank Spaces by Cass Lennox, Thaw by Elyse Springer, His Quiet Agent by Ada Maria Soto, All the Wrong Places by Ann Gallagher, The Executive Office series by Tal Bauer, Empty Net by Avon Gale or Concourse by Santino Hassell. All those feature ace-rep that I'd recommend you to read.

Although I think this may be one of the authors strongest books, I found it very hard to get into the story.

I love Japan, I have read hundreds of manga titles and so this book sounded perfect. I was also really glad to see more spectrum characters. I just found my interest was pulled off the page. I gave it to the 25% mark before I DNF. I think I will return but as of now, no.

I don’t even know what’s the worst part of this book. It’s horrible.

I’ll try to make sense of my notes for you, but summing it up: NO! You could stare for an hour into nothing and you would get more than from reading this book.

Sounds mean? Maybe. But this book is not only badly written, it makes a fetish of Japan and the so-called asexuality representation is plain harmful. So imagine how affected readers will feel with being portrayed this way. It’s more than ‘mean’.

So where to start… I really don’t know where to start so I’ll try to go chronologically through my notes. There is a slight spoiler but I feel it’s very important to know about this. I will mark it though, so you can decide for yourself.

So. First thing I wrote down: Antisocial states that it’s unusual and totally a Japanese/Manga/Anime thing for high schoolers to be without their parents. Have you read english YA? How often are there parents present? There are so few where the parents have a role in a story that I tell you about this in my reviews. Maybe that’ll give you a hint that it is not a Japanese thing.

Japan itself is so fetishezed in this book it’s not even funny anymore. Everything is Japanese but the people. There is not one character who is Japanese. Or Half. Or a quarter. No, that’s not true. There is one, but he is dead and has been way before this story started.

Okay, I can get being interested in Japanese Culture. Being a teen it may be understandable to fetishize it a little. But it’s still not right. Having an adult author be that way? Not cool.

I mean, one of the characters speaks like maybe 3 Japanese sentences. He uses it for sex talk. If my better half spoke in their mother tongue to me, yes totally okay for sex talk. Using a language you don’t even speak? Not okay!

There could be said way more about that Japan Fetish but I want to talk about something that’s very dear to me.

The ace rep. Or the NOT ace rep. I do not accept anything I have read in this book as ace rep. If you want to read about ace spectrum characters DO NOT READ THIS BOOK! DON’T DO IT! Says the ace spectrum reviewer. Or screams at you. Whatever you prefer.

First it states that all men are sexual beings. Wrong?! And even an allosexual man does not think about sex 24/7?

And then the allosexual character is portrayed as a saviour for accepting the other character’s kinda maybe asexuality. The allo one knows this before the person themselves btw. But okay. Maybe. Sounds totally unrealistic to me, because I suspected it myself even though I didn’t know the actual word or that it is a possibility and I kinda thought everyone felt this way and I therefore was always very confused when people were like “I’d fuck that” without knowing the ‘that’. But enough about this. Because I could go on for hours and I maybe will but not here and not now.

Before I read Antisocial I read an article by Heidi Cullinan in which she talked about being not ace but having a low libido or something. I have forgotten the actual details. Or rather I made me forget about it. Anyway, having this article in the back of my mind and reading this book? Tainted the book even more for me. But it would have been bad either way.

I was very pissed that the aroace side character – someone who knows how it is to be stereotyped – stereotypes all fraternity guys. Because you can’t be in a relationship with them. They are all the same! Sure.

I HATE THIS BOOK WITH THE WHOLE OF MY HEART AND SOUL AND BODY AND EVERY LAST DROP OF ACENESS IN ME!

How about having sensitivity readers? Huh?! Have people who know the stuff read over your “Hm, I think that could be the way it is”?! I would have done it for free fucking hell!

Okay, calming down. Or trying to. Give me a minute. Or an hour, I don’t know.

Those things alone were dnf worthy and I thought about dnfing so many times… But then there was a certain scene. And it reminded me of something from my past that I thought I was kinda okay about but apparently not.





SPOILER HERE with explicit language

One of the characters is in a fraternity and the new maybe members are at a party with everyone when one person is like “you have to blow our guys here and the first to make his finish gets to fuck a prostitute!”

And I was like “I’M OUTTA HERE!”

From cover to end, this was a magnificent book. I love every aspect of it, from the stunning cover art to every single character and the way an unusual love story comes to lighten up the heart of such beautiful persons. It was an absolutely joy to read it.

Xander is an amazing artist with zero social skills. Skylar, a frat boy, and son of a very powerful family with a bright future ahead and the ability to transform everything he touches into a success. When Xander is forced to work with Skylar for his senior project, both men have a plan in mind. But as friendship start taking place, they both start looking things from a different point of view and they begin an unexpected journey of self-discovery and acceptance.

This might be a romance, and I wasn't at all disappointed in that area, but there was so much more about this book than only a love story. It brought so many subjects to the picture that this book ended up being an enlightening experience. It delivered so much more than what I was expecting from it. This is the first time I've read a book from this author, but I feel like I'll be reading more of her work soon.

What I liked the most about the book were the characters. It had some great secondary characters, but as expected, Skylar and Xander won my heart. I think it's impossible not to love them. I had some struggles with Skylar at the beginning but as I keep reading and start getting to know him a little bit more, I came to care for him as much as I did Xander. They both had extremely complex personalities and it was beautiful to slowly uncover those layers to get to the core of who they were. I love the time taken to get there, and I also love the way the romantic part of their relationship wasn't rushed and the sexual part of it wasn't at all what traditionally is expected. I was concerned about how things might work but I couldn't be happier with the result.

One important part of the book was art, and it was something I loved about it. It is a relevant part of the plot and, at some point, the way their relationship started. It was so nice to try to understand something I'm completely ignorant about, as it was manga. I might not know anything about it, but it was lovely to see the passion the characters had for it and get to learn something about it.

Another important subject was family. It was so interesting to see their interactions and got to understand how everything became the way it was and how much or how little the family had to do with it.

Probably the only issue I had with the book was that there were times, very few but were there, when I had a hard time trying to connect with Skylar and Xander's emotions. Other than those few moments, I really loved the book. It was very well written and I would recommend it to any reader. It might be a M/M pairing that I get not everyone would love, but there was some interesting cultural aspect and extremely well made characters that I can't help want to share with everyone.

"Belief is powerful and important. Without it, we’re nothing but ants crawling across the dirt"

* *
2 / 5

When I read the last page of Antisocial, I really wasn’t sure how to feel about what I had just read. At all. Antisocial is a male/male romance novel that reads like a fanfiction with original characters; the characters begin as archetypes, the whole book is weirdly into Japan yet, as far as I could tell, has no Japanese characters, it’s really cutesy and then exceedingly sexual, it’s serious and deep and then all about the *power of love and friendship* (tm). Antisocial is an odd book, it’s one that I rolled my eyes at one page, awkwardly turned my Kindle off when I was on the bus another page, and then almost cried at.

“he left it unfinished, frustrated because it hadn’t satisfied him the way he wanted, but it had been a heady rush of creation, and now the beast was spent”

To begin with, we have our walking clichés: Xander Fairchild, troubled and angry artist who makes great paintings and then destroys them, who has no friends and doesn’t need any anyway because he just haaaates people they’re so rubbish. Whilst this attitude was a bit annoying, I loved the scenes that focused on Xander as an artist: the process of creation, imagination, and the feeling that your physical art can never match what you have in your head. Then we have Skylar Stone, aspiring lawyer and frat boy, who secretly loves manga and reads Hotay & Moo, the manga that Xander illustrates for the university paper. The two meet when members of Skylar’s fraternity vandalise a mural that Xander had painted; Skylar decides to try and repair the damage by making his senior business project about helping art students develop their business image and social media presence. Xander, who despises social media, is pressured into accepting Skylar’s help by his art professor, who requires that Xander presents a social media plan to get attendees to an art show.

I really enjoyed most of the first half. It’s a sweet, if traditionally fanfiction-esque, meeting, plot, and romance: reluctance to spend any time together on Xander’s part, Skylar’s trying to get to know this reclusive manga artist, the two opening up to each other about their personal problems, which include horrible parents and financial issues. There’s the supporting cast, the members of Lucky 7, who are Xander’s colleagues on the manga, who are diverse and friendly, coming together to support Xander and Skylar like it’s some sort of musical. Antisocial initially had all the hallmarks of a sweet YA romance and I was enjoying it.

And then. Bang on 50%, virtually, it gets really sort of sexual. Xander is gay and has known this since he was young where he was bullied for it. Skylar isn’t really sure what he is, shunning labels and trying to maintain his playboy façade. Disclaimer: I’m asexual (this is important to the review, I swear!). The synopsis suggests that Skylar is gray-spectrum asexuality, which I’m not entirely convinced is a necessary distinction, but that’s neither here nor there. I feel kind of conflicted about the “representation” here; on the one hand, it’s so great to have asexual characters who don’t have sex with their partners to “please them” or whatever nonsense, and for the characters to have an in-depth discussion about what they want. I also felt that Skylar was quite relatable; wanting to have a relationship, to be close with someone, but feeling like this is difficult because you don’t want to have sex and that finding someone who fits those criteria feels like a miracle! I really saw myself in this.

However, they also have these really weird scenes where they hold hands are both panting, acting like hand-holding in front of others is deliciously naughty, and claiming that they are “heavily making out”. Are they Vulcans?? No. I felt like not only was this super weird but that it gave the idea that because Skylar doesn’t want sex, more innocent activities, like hand holding, must become sexualised for Xander. There’s this bit where Xander tells Skylar it’s okay to orgasm when he’s painting on his hand! What. It was also just super awkward to read and definitely pushed the book way out of YA and into adult or new adult, which I felt was a touch misleading.

“the college was rich with Japanese cluture, though bizarrely low on people of actual Japanese heritage, and it had always been that way”

The other main problem that I had with this book was that it felt a bit fetish-y. The university campus was supposedly founded by Japanese-Americans to remind them of home, and Xander and Skylar are obsessed with Japan. It was cringe worthy and definitely reminded me of when I was like ten and used random Japanese words in my speech (you know, like desu and whatnot) and drew loads of manga. Bits of Japanese culture absolutely saturate this book and, as far as I can tell (correct me if I’m wrong, please!), there are no Japanese characters in this book. Xander and Skylar dream about moving to Japan, becoming Japanese mangaka, they use random Japanese phrases when they’re getting it on, pack each other Bento lunches and go on hunts for Japanese shrines, refer to their own developing romance in terms of anime. It moved from being about a guy that made a manga and another guy that read and enjoyed it, to being really obsessed and weird.

Like I said, I was very conflicted about this book. On the one hand, the start was amazing and cute and made me smile, and I was impressed by how it had a fanfiction sort of feel but was original, but it was also way too long, the characters felt like young teenagers despite being about 23, and the Japanese influence was too much. Antisocial had a good look at some difficult themes – coming to terms with your sexuality, dealing with pressuring parents – and I applaud the author for doing this, regardless of how I feel that Antisocial missed the mark for me.

My thanks to Netgalley and the author for an ARC of this book

While I did want to say something like "this book simply wasn't my thing" I'm afraid that it's more than just that.

Reading "Antisocial" made me extremely uncomfortable. It wasn't because it's a romance involving someone who identifies as asexual, although tbh I wasn't sure what expected me there and whether I would like it. It was because of the way Japanese culture is being fetishized here, and I say that as a white person who loves Japan and has been there several times. I can even understand the temptation of an author to want to write about something she clearly likes but all her characters act like, well, like me the first couple of months after I discovered manga where everything seems just so exotic and exciting and different, and all you see is the surface. And if all her characters had been like that (meaning they just had discovered their interest in Japanese culture) I *maybe* could have stomached it, but one of them was married to a Japanese man for heaven's sake, and all she does is gush about blood types.

I'm not offended on behalf of Japanese people; that's not my place. They certainly don't need me get offended on behalf of them. I just expect better from a good writer than this.

If it had been a different author, maybe my reaction wouldn't be this strong. But I've read quite a few of Heidi Cullinan's novels and she can look behind the surface of things and not just perpetuate stereotypes. I'm fairly sure she doesn't mean any harm here; her enthusiasm for manga and anime comes across from what little I've read of her social media interaction and that's fine. But Japan is more than cherry blossoms and manga, and it's neat how in the end there's no mention of how people in Japan react to Skylar and Xander's marriage.

(The scenes where Xander is speaking Japanese to basically turn Skylar on were probably the most disturbing to me.)

Also, asexual or not, this didn't feel like a romance, more like a YA coming of age novel and I am so not the audience for that. (I don't feel like I can comment on the depiction of asexuality here since tbh I don't know that much about it.) But again, my personal preferences asides I think it wasn't as well done as in some of her other novels (most of which have elements of coming of age stories).

After the first half, I probably would have just said, oh well, it's just not my thing. But while the first half still had its merits despite the things I didn't like, the seconnd half was a mess. Never mind that Skylar and his relationship to his father felt like a rehash from her "Love Lessons" series, the final reveal there and what happens between Xander and his family felt random and pointless and not very realistic. It's possible I wouldn't have minded so much without the other aspects I had problems with, but it often felt like the book didn't have direction and in the end she tried to make sense of the muddle somehow.

I actually really wanted to like this because it's obvious how much this book means to her. But I really didn't, for the reasons mentioned above. Maybe it works better for people who don't know anything about Japan, I really couldn't say. But even if you take that away it wasn't a very good novel, in my opinion, and I would suggest rather reading something else. Some manga, perhaps, and preferably not some illegal scanlation (another red flag for me). Or some of Heidi Cullinan's other novels, some of which I really loved and some of which feature characters who like anime and don't venture into fetishizing it like this one does.

I really loved this book, it was fresh with a flow that sucked the reader in. It was in my honest opinion So cute. Antisocial by Cullinan is a clutter of feels, angst and fanboying.
Add in some cute MCs and a plot that includes artistic philosophy, equality issues and learning to be true to who you are and you've got one entrancing read. Xander and Skylar are incredibly real, they deal with issues that range from family relationships to identity crises all while trying to stay true to who they really are.
Antisocial's inter-cultural elements were well researched down to the tiniest detail. And they were slotted in naturally which lends incredible authenticity to the book.
I really loved antisocial and if I have any complaints it's that we never really saw a real relationship between Skylar and his mother. I'd have loved to see more of that but it was an entrancing read that I'd recommend to anyone.
I posted this same review on Goodreads but I can't link it. I posted it under the name Anike and I was really happy to read a book as great as Antisocial.

Antisocial by Heidi Cullinan is a wonderful contemporary romance that made me happy on multiple levels. Xander Fairchild can’t stand people in general and frat boys in particular, so when he’s forced to spend his summer working on his senior project with Skylar Stone, a silver-tongued Delta Sig with a trust fund who wants to make Xander over into a shiny new image, Xander is determined to resist. He came to idyllic, Japanese culture-soaked Benten College to hide and make manga, not to be transformed into a corporate clone in the eleventh hour. Skylar’s life has been laid out for him since before he was born, but all it takes is one look at Xander’s artwork, and the veneer around him begins to crack. Xander himself does plenty of damage too. There’s something about the antisocial artist’s refusal to yield that forces Skylar to acknowledge how much his own orchestrated future is killing him slowly…as is the truth about his gray-spectrum sexuality, which he hasn’t dared to speak aloud, even to himself. Through a summer of art and friendship, Xander and Skylar learn more about each other, themselves, and their feelings for one another. But as their senior year begins, they must decide if they will part ways and return to the dull futures they had planned, or if they will take a risk and leap into a brightly colored future—together.

Antisocial is so much more than I expected. It is a romance, it is a coming of age story, and it is a wonderful study of the shades of the spectrum when it comes to sexual identity.Xander is an artist, and is as closed off and moody as any stereotype you might image. Skylar is a golden boy, being groomed for a life as a corporate lawyer. Each has their wounds and secrets. I loved the development of friendship between these two unlikely partners, and how the one that seemed the most in need of saving at the start was the one that offered the most encouragement and support through the entire story. I found the open communication between Xander and Skylar was so important, and something that happens too rarely in real life and romance novels alike. The inclusion of a friend group, and the struggles with parents and finances were important and valuable parts of the story- making it more real and engaging. My only sticking point was just how perfect their happy ending was, I think some of the parental resolution was left hanging. However, as this is my only issue with the book, I still want to highly recommend the read to anyone even vaguely interested.

Antisocial is a contemporary romance that explores the shades of sexual identity and the search most of us have for who we want to be, and what makes us happy. Every time I had to step away from reading I found myself eager to get back to the world of Xander and Skylar. I think this is a great read, and that young and new adults should read it particularly if they or anyone they care about is struggling with their own sexuality.

Antisocial was one of those novels that left me both educated and entertained. I have read a few other stories that featured asexual, or ace, characters before, but those often left me with no real sense of better understanding just how someone who identified as ace really coped with all the emotions and questions they had about their sexuality. With this book, I felt author Heidi Cullinan truly plumbed the depths of what it means to continually grapple with trying to identify exactly what you are experiencing when you finally come to understand that the way in which you experience love for another person may manifest differently than your peers. Even now I am fumbling with trying to explain why this book felt so genuine—why Skylar seemed to resonate with me as a person who I could relate to, just because he was an average joe in so many ways.

He and Xander evoked such a deep emotional response from me—I was shocked at how much I wanted to protect what they had—and how excited I was when they allowed each other to be who they were without forcing themselves or their relationship to fit societal norms. But, mostly I fell in love with these two men because they became so real to me due to the outstanding abilities of Heidi Cullinan to wrote such awesome characters and develop a gorgeous story for them to inhabit.

The beauty of the title Antisocial was that it could have been applied to nearly every character in the book. Xander was grumpy, shy, impatient and uninterested in developing friendships. The few friends he had were kept at arm’s length, primarily because he was not interested in being hurt yet again. He’d had a difficult time in high school, having been bullied repeatedly, but it was not just that which kept Xander’s feelings locked away. He simply did not have patience for many people, and his art was his main means of escaping the world. So, when he discovered that Mr. Popular, aka Skylar Stone, was going to take over the all-important media campaign for his senior art project, Xander was fit to be tied.

Skylar, on the other hand, was intrigued by Xander. He always attacked a project with his full attention, but Xander was different. Rather than being repelled by Xander’s gruffness, Skylar found himself drawn to the quiet artist. But Skylar was a master at hiding his real self, using his charm and good looks to date a myriad of people so that he could glean important political information to give to his father in the hopes of gaining his attention. That was why Sky was studying for law school—so that he could get in to Yale and garner his dad’s approval, something that was more important to Skylar than breathing itself. Skylar could never let anyone see the real man beneath the shining exterior, particularly because he wasn’t so sure who that man was or what, if anything, attracted him sexually. His life was a lie, and the fear that someone might discover that terrified him.

When these two men collide, secrets are unlocked that will prove to be shocking to both of them. Not only that but a relationship will begin to develop that will chart new territory for both men, allowing them to discover along the way what it means to give and receive love that is genuine and fragile. Never rushed, always careful, the way in which Skylar and Xander explore their attraction is beautiful to watch. Antisocial is not your conventional romance; it is so much more than that. It is a deliberate courtship based on mutual respect and discovery. Love blossoms in this story because two people allow their love for the other person to be the guiding force between them; is it a transcendent love that defies description or pattern; it is raw, real and incredibly sensual. At times, in the intimate moments between Xander and Skylar, I was hyperaware of being the third party in scenes that were so honest and emotional that I felt almost voyeuristic. Yet, I also knew the author was inviting me in, allowing me to see and understand what real, unselfish love really is.

I am so sorry I can’t fully explain why this story was so satisfying for me, why I felt that I was a part of some great moment when this novel finally finished, but I did and it was. I will merely say that Antisocial is an outstanding book and one that I would highly recommend.

DNF.

I'm sorry this book wasn't for me. I find the topics discussed in the book to be interesting but I myself have been Turning off the contemporary romance genre for a while now. I'm sorry I could review this but thank you for giving me the chance.

Heidi Cullinans books contain always a magical story, one you can find yourself in, one which is sometimes sad and heartbreaking but also so sweet and great. The same goes for Antisocial.

It’s a different book than the other by her, still it’s totally Heidi Cullinan. When I saw the cover I had to stop, I was mesmezised and couldn’t look away. In fact I watched the cover over and over again, took a look at the details. The cover is really something different, something which stands out on a bookshelve, not only because it is drawn in mangastyle. Natsuko, the artist who draw the cover, did a fabulous job, it’s no wonder, people may recognize the style from several Yuri on Ice drawings. But enough of this. Follow the link of the artist to the website. The cover stands out and take your attention, and so does the book, the content.

What I really loved about the book was the topic, but also the cultural connection. Antisocial takes place in America, but it has a huge Japanese culture included, and damn, my heart was screaming of joy, I had a big grin on my face, getting bigger and bigger with every mention of a particular Japanese manner, a manga or anime mentioned in the book. 🙂 Because I am a fan of the Japanese culture for almost 20 years, I could really relate to things, and Heidi did such a great job in her research and made it really understandable and hopefully pleasurable for the non-informed reader. It educates but isn’t over the top, at least this way the way I experienced it.

The two character Skylar and Xander were amazing. Simple as that. I can’t say what I expected when I read the blurb but truly not this, not this depth. Over the book, the full nearly 400 pages long, there is such a huge character development. Unexpected but at first but then not. Not only Xander gains so much from Skylar – he grows and he comes out his shell – Xander is later also Skylar’s anchor, the important person who guides him. I would never expected that this character, this figure would need him as much as Xander needs Skylar. It’s a symbiosis and it’s pure and beautiful.

The book is full of interesting minor character, we have a huge scale of individuals, sometimes you have to pause a bit and reflect about them because they have so much information to give, still it’s not enough. It’s really awesome how Heidi Cullinan gives them their own voices, with a few descriptions and actions, their own experiences and a way they feel real to the reader. I guess Heidi could take any of this character and write a novella or own book. I admit I was very intrigued by Zelda. They (genderneutral pronouns are used) were faszinating and had really interesting thoughts. 🙂 But they care for Xander and despite a grumpy, moody behaviour they are sweet in their own way. 🙂
I also had to laugh a bit because of the name. I am not sure if the author planned this, if it was her intention but with naming they Zelda it’s like making a small pun.
[Note: the game the name comes from is called Zelda, a lot of people misname the game’s hero, Link, for Zelda, which is the princess to rescue].
Maybe it’s just coincidence and only the name was fitting because of the nerdy topic (naming a child after a video game), but I had to giggle about this potential pun. xD

If you expect heavy, hot and steamy graphic scenes, despite this is a book is about an artist and his drawings (kinda ironic ;)), there is no display of the affection in the “conservative” way. Means: you have high sensual encounter but in a different way. They are displayed with small touchings, no (french) kisses or only light pecks and the focus is on the person. I would dare say to call it “sensual sexual encounter”. To describe it without revealing too much of the particular scenes is a bit tough, so I keep it this vague.
It’s maybe a bit strange for the reader but I have to say: give it a try. Really. Open your mind for unconventional things like this.
The scenes are full of emotion and so hot, because they go right into the heart, touch you. And I only mention that brushes and paint can be used very creativity. 😉 Hot, really hot. :3
[Note: this isn’t in any meant as insulting, never planned to be ace-,grey- or demiphobic. With “unconventional” I mean the way of how “daily objects” are used in a sexual scene, the way how the character share their bond, nearly without touching each other or only lightly. On the other hand you don’t have to fear BSDM or a kinky use of those objects if you were wondering, too.]

The book is full of events, effecting the character’s lives and it’s a bit diffcult to catch everything in a review. I also won’t to give too much away. It’s really a journey you go with the character, the character development is amazing, you see it through the pages. The cultural mixes and the nerdy topic, also the different spectrums in sexuality shown by different character (we have gay, cishet, gray, ace, demi…) gives the book its depth.

I guess for some people this book isn’t fitting, because of the spectrum of sexuality or because they can’t relate to the Japanese topic and all the works etc. named. But everbody who loves this, everbody who is eager to explore new things, for those it’s an amazing book and simply beautiful.

5 out of 5 stars for this. Grab your copy, dive into this.

Review originally posted on my blog with added content on Mikku-chan / A world full of words

I'm speechless. Breathless. Overjoyed is maybe a word i would also use.
Now I am gonna confess that I knew absolutely nothing about this book before I started it, and I was happily surprised to find out that one of the characters is asexual (or somewhere on the spectrum). I have to admit that I'm pretty clueless when it comes to asexuality or anything really, that falls into the grey area of sexuality. It was huge! An incredible learning experience for me. I'm at a complete loss of words. The writing style, character development, plot... everything felt natural and easy to read. It captivated me, tickled me, enticed me, taught me. I cried, I laughed and I will keep reading this book and sharing it with everyone I meet. thank you.
Yes, there is no "traditional" sense of sexual content but the most intimate scenes between Xander and Skylar were..... surreal. The logical part of my brain tells me I have no way to truly understand and appreciate the way two such people can relate to each other.... but honest to everything good in this world, I found myself at the edge of my seat and totally breathless every stroke of that brush. I could equally feel that first "make out" through only hand touches and the significance it had to a character. Honestly, it was enlightening and so long! I loved it! I loved that story was so well developed and it didn't just automatically get into a relationship but where the characters actually got to know each other and grow together. There was so much love and acceptance in this book and I kept thinking. This is what I want my life to be, full of acceptance, love and courage.
I found the struggle each character had with their parents to be very relatable (at least to me) and I was thankful, so thankful to see a resolve and happy ending with them. It gives me hope. For myself. For others. I want to tell everyone about this book. I want everyone to read it, to buy it, to soak it in and realize that love is transcendent. It's not about your gender, or age, or color, or belief, or sexual orientation or classification. It's not. It just exists and it grows and it becomes something beautiful, like this book. A masterpiece.

4 Stars

There were aspects of this book that I absolutely loved and some that well, frankly, bored me to tears. I absolutely loved Xander and Skylar, but I'm not a fan of Manga or Anime and this book is filled with quite a bit of detailed conversations/talks on/about the subject and I just don't understand it and it really doesn't interest me.

I did love the relationship and romance portion of the story. Xander and Skylar fit one another well and although they do have things in common they come from completely different backgrounds, yet those differences complimented one another. I loved the patience and understanding they showed to each other. They were accepting of the others limitations and I absolutely loved watching them explore and even work past some of those barriers.

This story is well-written, but it was a really long book and as I said, a lot of it dealt with Manga. While that's not for me, I know plenty love it and will find this portion of the story fascinating. The author is obviously very well educated on the subject and it comes across in her writing.

This story also had some great secondary characters as well that were an amazing support system for both Skylar and Xander. Skylar and Xander had amazing chemistry and the intimacy between them was sweet and loving. I'd definitely recommend this story!

*copy provided to me by the author/publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review*

4 Stars!!!

This is my first ace book and while I've read a bit about it, I had no clue what to expect. I think Heidi Cullinan did a fantastic job with that and showing us the kind of intimacy that would work for both Skylar and Xander.

I adored Skylar and Xander. My heart broke I don't know how many times for Skylar, the sweet, poor little rich boy that was looking for love, for acknowledgment, for something that showed that he mattered. And then again for Xander, when his mother didn't put his needs nowhere near the same level she did with his stepfather and siblings. Skylar was steadfast and awesome and I just couldn't get enough of how perfect he was with Xander. Xander was grumpy and possessive. Xander was like Skylar' perfect counterpart, they just complemented each other. Where Skylar was outgoing, Xander was introverted, where Xander was more fierce, Skylar was charming. And really, both were a force to be reckoned with when they were trying to help each other and their little group of friends and family. I especially loved whenever Xander rushed to Skylar's defense, LOL, he was all fire and brimstone, no signs of shyness there.

I loved the secondary characters, Pamela, Unc, Sara, Cody and Zelda, especially. I wasn't too sure of Zelda at first, but they grew up on me. I hated Skylar's parents, especially Leighton, who was despicable! And even if Xander's mom had a nice turnaround there in the end, I wasn't too fond of her for most of the book, or of her husband, who was horrible, too.

All in all, Antisocial was a great read, although perhaps there were a few instances in which I was a tad bored with all the Manga details, but overall, it's a sweet, angsty ace romance that left me with a smile on my face and let's be honest here, you just can't go wrong with a Heidi Cullinan book. Very recommendable!

*** Copy provided to the reviewer via NetGalley for my reading pleasure, a review wasn't a requirement. ***