I don’t even know what’s the worst part of this book. It’s horrible.

I’ll try to make sense of my notes for you, but summing it up: NO! You could stare for an hour into nothing and you would get more than from reading this book.

Sounds mean? Maybe. But this book is not only badly written, it makes a fetish of Japan and the so-called asexuality representation is plain harmful. So imagine how affected readers will feel with being portrayed this way. It’s more than ‘mean’.

So where to start… I really don’t know where to start so I’ll try to go chronologically through my notes. There is a slight spoiler but I feel it’s very important to know about this. I will mark it though, so you can decide for yourself.

So. First thing I wrote down: Antisocial states that it’s unusual and totally a Japanese/Manga/Anime thing for high schoolers to be without their parents. Have you read english YA? How often are there parents present? There are so few where the parents have a role in a story that I tell you about this in my reviews. Maybe that’ll give you a hint that it is not a Japanese thing.

Japan itself is so fetishezed in this book it’s not even funny anymore. Everything is Japanese but the people. There is not one character who is Japanese. Or Half. Or a quarter. No, that’s not true. There is one, but he is dead and has been way before this story started.

Okay, I can get being interested in Japanese Culture. Being a teen it may be understandable to fetishize it a little. But it’s still not right. Having an adult author be that way? Not cool.

I mean, one of the characters speaks like maybe 3 Japanese sentences. He uses it for sex talk. If my better half spoke in their mother tongue to me, yes totally okay for sex talk. Using a language you don’t even speak? Not okay!

There could be said way more about that Japan Fetish but I want to talk about something that’s very dear to me.

The ace rep. Or the NOT ace rep. I do not accept anything I have read in this book as ace rep. If you want to read about ace spectrum characters DO NOT READ THIS BOOK! DON’T DO IT! Says the ace spectrum reviewer. Or screams at you. Whatever you prefer.

First it states that all men are sexual beings. Wrong?! And even an allosexual man does not think about sex 24/7?

And then the allosexual character is portrayed as a saviour for accepting the other character’s kinda maybe asexuality. The allo one knows this before the person themselves btw. But okay. Maybe. Sounds totally unrealistic to me, because I suspected it myself even though I didn’t know the actual word or that it is a possibility and I kinda thought everyone felt this way and I therefore was always very confused when people were like “I’d fuck that” without knowing the ‘that’. But enough about this. Because I could go on for hours and I maybe will but not here and not now.

Before I read Antisocial I read an article by Heidi Cullinan in which she talked about being not ace but having a low libido or something. I have forgotten the actual details. Or rather I made me forget about it. Anyway, having this article in the back of my mind and reading this book? Tainted the book even more for me. But it would have been bad either way.

I was very pissed that the aroace side character – someone who knows how it is to be stereotyped – stereotypes all fraternity guys. Because you can’t be in a relationship with them. They are all the same! Sure.

I HATE THIS BOOK WITH THE WHOLE OF MY HEART AND SOUL AND BODY AND EVERY LAST DROP OF ACENESS IN ME!

How about having sensitivity readers? Huh?! Have people who know the stuff read over your “Hm, I think that could be the way it is”?! I would have done it for free fucking hell!

Okay, calming down. Or trying to. Give me a minute. Or an hour, I don’t know.

Those things alone were dnf worthy and I thought about dnfing so many times… But then there was a certain scene. And it reminded me of something from my past that I thought I was kinda okay about but apparently not.





SPOILER HERE with explicit language

One of the characters is in a fraternity and the new maybe members are at a party with everyone when one person is like “you have to blow our guys here and the first to make his finish gets to fuck a prostitute!”

And I was like “I’M OUTTA HERE!”

From cover to end, this was a magnificent book. I love every aspect of it, from the stunning cover art to every single character and the way an unusual love story comes to lighten up the heart of such beautiful persons. It was an absolutely joy to read it.

Xander is an amazing artist with zero social skills. Skylar, a frat boy, and son of a very powerful family with a bright future ahead and the ability to transform everything he touches into a success. When Xander is forced to work with Skylar for his senior project, both men have a plan in mind. But as friendship start taking place, they both start looking things from a different point of view and they begin an unexpected journey of self-discovery and acceptance.

This might be a romance, and I wasn't at all disappointed in that area, but there was so much more about this book than only a love story. It brought so many subjects to the picture that this book ended up being an enlightening experience. It delivered so much more than what I was expecting from it. This is the first time I've read a book from this author, but I feel like I'll be reading more of her work soon.

What I liked the most about the book were the characters. It had some great secondary characters, but as expected, Skylar and Xander won my heart. I think it's impossible not to love them. I had some struggles with Skylar at the beginning but as I keep reading and start getting to know him a little bit more, I came to care for him as much as I did Xander. They both had extremely complex personalities and it was beautiful to slowly uncover those layers to get to the core of who they were. I love the time taken to get there, and I also love the way the romantic part of their relationship wasn't rushed and the sexual part of it wasn't at all what traditionally is expected. I was concerned about how things might work but I couldn't be happier with the result.

One important part of the book was art, and it was something I loved about it. It is a relevant part of the plot and, at some point, the way their relationship started. It was so nice to try to understand something I'm completely ignorant about, as it was manga. I might not know anything about it, but it was lovely to see the passion the characters had for it and get to learn something about it.

Another important subject was family. It was so interesting to see their interactions and got to understand how everything became the way it was and how much or how little the family had to do with it.

Probably the only issue I had with the book was that there were times, very few but were there, when I had a hard time trying to connect with Skylar and Xander's emotions. Other than those few moments, I really loved the book. It was very well written and I would recommend it to any reader. It might be a M/M pairing that I get not everyone would love, but there was some interesting cultural aspect and extremely well made characters that I can't help want to share with everyone.

"Belief is powerful and important. Without it, we’re nothing but ants crawling across the dirt"

* *
2 / 5

When I read the last page of Antisocial, I really wasn’t sure how to feel about what I had just read. At all. Antisocial is a male/male romance novel that reads like a fanfiction with original characters; the characters begin as archetypes, the whole book is weirdly into Japan yet, as far as I could tell, has no Japanese characters, it’s really cutesy and then exceedingly sexual, it’s serious and deep and then all about the *power of love and friendship* (tm). Antisocial is an odd book, it’s one that I rolled my eyes at one page, awkwardly turned my Kindle off when I was on the bus another page, and then almost cried at.

“he left it unfinished, frustrated because it hadn’t satisfied him the way he wanted, but it had been a heady rush of creation, and now the beast was spent”

To begin with, we have our walking clichés: Xander Fairchild, troubled and angry artist who makes great paintings and then destroys them, who has no friends and doesn’t need any anyway because he just haaaates people they’re so rubbish. Whilst this attitude was a bit annoying, I loved the scenes that focused on Xander as an artist: the process of creation, imagination, and the feeling that your physical art can never match what you have in your head. Then we have Skylar Stone, aspiring lawyer and frat boy, who secretly loves manga and reads Hotay & Moo, the manga that Xander illustrates for the university paper. The two meet when members of Skylar’s fraternity vandalise a mural that Xander had painted; Skylar decides to try and repair the damage by making his senior business project about helping art students develop their business image and social media presence. Xander, who despises social media, is pressured into accepting Skylar’s help by his art professor, who requires that Xander presents a social media plan to get attendees to an art show.

I really enjoyed most of the first half. It’s a sweet, if traditionally fanfiction-esque, meeting, plot, and romance: reluctance to spend any time together on Xander’s part, Skylar’s trying to get to know this reclusive manga artist, the two opening up to each other about their personal problems, which include horrible parents and financial issues. There’s the supporting cast, the members of Lucky 7, who are Xander’s colleagues on the manga, who are diverse and friendly, coming together to support Xander and Skylar like it’s some sort of musical. Antisocial initially had all the hallmarks of a sweet YA romance and I was enjoying it.

And then. Bang on 50%, virtually, it gets really sort of sexual. Xander is gay and has known this since he was young where he was bullied for it. Skylar isn’t really sure what he is, shunning labels and trying to maintain his playboy façade. Disclaimer: I’m asexual (this is important to the review, I swear!). The synopsis suggests that Skylar is gray-spectrum asexuality, which I’m not entirely convinced is a necessary distinction, but that’s neither here nor there. I feel kind of conflicted about the “representation” here; on the one hand, it’s so great to have asexual characters who don’t have sex with their partners to “please them” or whatever nonsense, and for the characters to have an in-depth discussion about what they want. I also felt that Skylar was quite relatable; wanting to have a relationship, to be close with someone, but feeling like this is difficult because you don’t want to have sex and that finding someone who fits those criteria feels like a miracle! I really saw myself in this.

However, they also have these really weird scenes where they hold hands are both panting, acting like hand-holding in front of others is deliciously naughty, and claiming that they are “heavily making out”. Are they Vulcans?? No. I felt like not only was this super weird but that it gave the idea that because Skylar doesn’t want sex, more innocent activities, like hand holding, must become sexualised for Xander. There’s this bit where Xander tells Skylar it’s okay to orgasm when he’s painting on his hand! What. It was also just super awkward to read and definitely pushed the book way out of YA and into adult or new adult, which I felt was a touch misleading.

“the college was rich with Japanese cluture, though bizarrely low on people of actual Japanese heritage, and it had always been that way”

The other main problem that I had with this book was that it felt a bit fetish-y. The university campus was supposedly founded by Japanese-Americans to remind them of home, and Xander and Skylar are obsessed with Japan. It was cringe worthy and definitely reminded me of when I was like ten and used random Japanese words in my speech (you know, like desu and whatnot) and drew loads of manga. Bits of Japanese culture absolutely saturate this book and, as far as I can tell (correct me if I’m wrong, please!), there are no Japanese characters in this book. Xander and Skylar dream about moving to Japan, becoming Japanese mangaka, they use random Japanese phrases when they’re getting it on, pack each other Bento lunches and go on hunts for Japanese shrines, refer to their own developing romance in terms of anime. It moved from being about a guy that made a manga and another guy that read and enjoyed it, to being really obsessed and weird.

Like I said, I was very conflicted about this book. On the one hand, the start was amazing and cute and made me smile, and I was impressed by how it had a fanfiction sort of feel but was original, but it was also way too long, the characters felt like young teenagers despite being about 23, and the Japanese influence was too much. Antisocial had a good look at some difficult themes – coming to terms with your sexuality, dealing with pressuring parents – and I applaud the author for doing this, regardless of how I feel that Antisocial missed the mark for me.

My thanks to Netgalley and the author for an ARC of this book

While I did want to say something like "this book simply wasn't my thing" I'm afraid that it's more than just that.

Reading "Antisocial" made me extremely uncomfortable. It wasn't because it's a romance involving someone who identifies as asexual, although tbh I wasn't sure what expected me there and whether I would like it. It was because of the way Japanese culture is being fetishized here, and I say that as a white person who loves Japan and has been there several times. I can even understand the temptation of an author to want to write about something she clearly likes but all her characters act like, well, like me the first couple of months after I discovered manga where everything seems just so exotic and exciting and different, and all you see is the surface. And if all her characters had been like that (meaning they just had discovered their interest in Japanese culture) I *maybe* could have stomached it, but one of them was married to a Japanese man for heaven's sake, and all she does is gush about blood types.

I'm not offended on behalf of Japanese people; that's not my place. They certainly don't need me get offended on behalf of them. I just expect better from a good writer than this.

If it had been a different author, maybe my reaction wouldn't be this strong. But I've read quite a few of Heidi Cullinan's novels and she can look behind the surface of things and not just perpetuate stereotypes. I'm fairly sure she doesn't mean any harm here; her enthusiasm for manga and anime comes across from what little I've read of her social media interaction and that's fine. But Japan is more than cherry blossoms and manga, and it's neat how in the end there's no mention of how people in Japan react to Skylar and Xander's marriage.

(The scenes where Xander is speaking Japanese to basically turn Skylar on were probably the most disturbing to me.)

Also, asexual or not, this didn't feel like a romance, more like a YA coming of age novel and I am so not the audience for that. (I don't feel like I can comment on the depiction of asexuality here since tbh I don't know that much about it.) But again, my personal preferences asides I think it wasn't as well done as in some of her other novels (most of which have elements of coming of age stories).

After the first half, I probably would have just said, oh well, it's just not my thing. But while the first half still had its merits despite the things I didn't like, the seconnd half was a mess. Never mind that Skylar and his relationship to his father felt like a rehash from her "Love Lessons" series, the final reveal there and what happens between Xander and his family felt random and pointless and not very realistic. It's possible I wouldn't have minded so much without the other aspects I had problems with, but it often felt like the book didn't have direction and in the end she tried to make sense of the muddle somehow.

I actually really wanted to like this because it's obvious how much this book means to her. But I really didn't, for the reasons mentioned above. Maybe it works better for people who don't know anything about Japan, I really couldn't say. But even if you take that away it wasn't a very good novel, in my opinion, and I would suggest rather reading something else. Some manga, perhaps, and preferably not some illegal scanlation (another red flag for me). Or some of Heidi Cullinan's other novels, some of which I really loved and some of which feature characters who like anime and don't venture into fetishizing it like this one does.

I really loved this book, it was fresh with a flow that sucked the reader in. It was in my honest opinion So cute. Antisocial by Cullinan is a clutter of feels, angst and fanboying.
Add in some cute MCs and a plot that includes artistic philosophy, equality issues and learning to be true to who you are and you've got one entrancing read. Xander and Skylar are incredibly real, they deal with issues that range from family relationships to identity crises all while trying to stay true to who they really are.
Antisocial's inter-cultural elements were well researched down to the tiniest detail. And they were slotted in naturally which lends incredible authenticity to the book.
I really loved antisocial and if I have any complaints it's that we never really saw a real relationship between Skylar and his mother. I'd have loved to see more of that but it was an entrancing read that I'd recommend to anyone.
I posted this same review on Goodreads but I can't link it. I posted it under the name Anike and I was really happy to read a book as great as Antisocial.

Antisocial by Heidi Cullinan is a wonderful contemporary romance that made me happy on multiple levels. Xander Fairchild can’t stand people in general and frat boys in particular, so when he’s forced to spend his summer working on his senior project with Skylar Stone, a silver-tongued Delta Sig with a trust fund who wants to make Xander over into a shiny new image, Xander is determined to resist. He came to idyllic, Japanese culture-soaked Benten College to hide and make manga, not to be transformed into a corporate clone in the eleventh hour. Skylar’s life has been laid out for him since before he was born, but all it takes is one look at Xander’s artwork, and the veneer around him begins to crack. Xander himself does plenty of damage too. There’s something about the antisocial artist’s refusal to yield that forces Skylar to acknowledge how much his own orchestrated future is killing him slowly…as is the truth about his gray-spectrum sexuality, which he hasn’t dared to speak aloud, even to himself. Through a summer of art and friendship, Xander and Skylar learn more about each other, themselves, and their feelings for one another. But as their senior year begins, they must decide if they will part ways and return to the dull futures they had planned, or if they will take a risk and leap into a brightly colored future—together.

Antisocial is so much more than I expected. It is a romance, it is a coming of age story, and it is a wonderful study of the shades of the spectrum when it comes to sexual identity.Xander is an artist, and is as closed off and moody as any stereotype you might image. Skylar is a golden boy, being groomed for a life as a corporate lawyer. Each has their wounds and secrets. I loved the development of friendship between these two unlikely partners, and how the one that seemed the most in need of saving at the start was the one that offered the most encouragement and support through the entire story. I found the open communication between Xander and Skylar was so important, and something that happens too rarely in real life and romance novels alike. The inclusion of a friend group, and the struggles with parents and finances were important and valuable parts of the story- making it more real and engaging. My only sticking point was just how perfect their happy ending was, I think some of the parental resolution was left hanging. However, as this is my only issue with the book, I still want to highly recommend the read to anyone even vaguely interested.

Antisocial is a contemporary romance that explores the shades of sexual identity and the search most of us have for who we want to be, and what makes us happy. Every time I had to step away from reading I found myself eager to get back to the world of Xander and Skylar. I think this is a great read, and that young and new adults should read it particularly if they or anyone they care about is struggling with their own sexuality.

Antisocial was one of those novels that left me both educated and entertained. I have read a few other stories that featured asexual, or ace, characters before, but those often left me with no real sense of better understanding just how someone who identified as ace really coped with all the emotions and questions they had about their sexuality. With this book, I felt author Heidi Cullinan truly plumbed the depths of what it means to continually grapple with trying to identify exactly what you are experiencing when you finally come to understand that the way in which you experience love for another person may manifest differently than your peers. Even now I am fumbling with trying to explain why this book felt so genuine—why Skylar seemed to resonate with me as a person who I could relate to, just because he was an average joe in so many ways.

He and Xander evoked such a deep emotional response from me—I was shocked at how much I wanted to protect what they had—and how excited I was when they allowed each other to be who they were without forcing themselves or their relationship to fit societal norms. But, mostly I fell in love with these two men because they became so real to me due to the outstanding abilities of Heidi Cullinan to wrote such awesome characters and develop a gorgeous story for them to inhabit.

The beauty of the title Antisocial was that it could have been applied to nearly every character in the book. Xander was grumpy, shy, impatient and uninterested in developing friendships. The few friends he had were kept at arm’s length, primarily because he was not interested in being hurt yet again. He’d had a difficult time in high school, having been bullied repeatedly, but it was not just that which kept Xander’s feelings locked away. He simply did not have patience for many people, and his art was his main means of escaping the world. So, when he discovered that Mr. Popular, aka Skylar Stone, was going to take over the all-important media campaign for his senior art project, Xander was fit to be tied.

Skylar, on the other hand, was intrigued by Xander. He always attacked a project with his full attention, but Xander was different. Rather than being repelled by Xander’s gruffness, Skylar found himself drawn to the quiet artist. But Skylar was a master at hiding his real self, using his charm and good looks to date a myriad of people so that he could glean important political information to give to his father in the hopes of gaining his attention. That was why Sky was studying for law school—so that he could get in to Yale and garner his dad’s approval, something that was more important to Skylar than breathing itself. Skylar could never let anyone see the real man beneath the shining exterior, particularly because he wasn’t so sure who that man was or what, if anything, attracted him sexually. His life was a lie, and the fear that someone might discover that terrified him.

When these two men collide, secrets are unlocked that will prove to be shocking to both of them. Not only that but a relationship will begin to develop that will chart new territory for both men, allowing them to discover along the way what it means to give and receive love that is genuine and fragile. Never rushed, always careful, the way in which Skylar and Xander explore their attraction is beautiful to watch. Antisocial is not your conventional romance; it is so much more than that. It is a deliberate courtship based on mutual respect and discovery. Love blossoms in this story because two people allow their love for the other person to be the guiding force between them; is it a transcendent love that defies description or pattern; it is raw, real and incredibly sensual. At times, in the intimate moments between Xander and Skylar, I was hyperaware of being the third party in scenes that were so honest and emotional that I felt almost voyeuristic. Yet, I also knew the author was inviting me in, allowing me to see and understand what real, unselfish love really is.

I am so sorry I can’t fully explain why this story was so satisfying for me, why I felt that I was a part of some great moment when this novel finally finished, but I did and it was. I will merely say that Antisocial is an outstanding book and one that I would highly recommend.

DNF.

I'm sorry this book wasn't for me. I find the topics discussed in the book to be interesting but I myself have been Turning off the contemporary romance genre for a while now. I'm sorry I could review this but thank you for giving me the chance.

Heidi Cullinans books contain always a magical story, one you can find yourself in, one which is sometimes sad and heartbreaking but also so sweet and great. The same goes for Antisocial.

It’s a different book than the other by her, still it’s totally Heidi Cullinan. When I saw the cover I had to stop, I was mesmezised and couldn’t look away. In fact I watched the cover over and over again, took a look at the details. The cover is really something different, something which stands out on a bookshelve, not only because it is drawn in mangastyle. Natsuko, the artist who draw the cover, did a fabulous job, it’s no wonder, people may recognize the style from several Yuri on Ice drawings. But enough of this. Follow the link of the artist to the website. The cover stands out and take your attention, and so does the book, the content.

What I really loved about the book was the topic, but also the cultural connection. Antisocial takes place in America, but it has a huge Japanese culture included, and damn, my heart was screaming of joy, I had a big grin on my face, getting bigger and bigger with every mention of a particular Japanese manner, a manga or anime mentioned in the book. 🙂 Because I am a fan of the Japanese culture for almost 20 years, I could really relate to things, and Heidi did such a great job in her research and made it really understandable and hopefully pleasurable for the non-informed reader. It educates but isn’t over the top, at least this way the way I experienced it.

The two character Skylar and Xander were amazing. Simple as that. I can’t say what I expected when I read the blurb but truly not this, not this depth. Over the book, the full nearly 400 pages long, there is such a huge character development. Unexpected but at first but then not. Not only Xander gains so much from Skylar – he grows and he comes out his shell – Xander is later also Skylar’s anchor, the important person who guides him. I would never expected that this character, this figure would need him as much as Xander needs Skylar. It’s a symbiosis and it’s pure and beautiful.

The book is full of interesting minor character, we have a huge scale of individuals, sometimes you have to pause a bit and reflect about them because they have so much information to give, still it’s not enough. It’s really awesome how Heidi Cullinan gives them their own voices, with a few descriptions and actions, their own experiences and a way they feel real to the reader. I guess Heidi could take any of this character and write a novella or own book. I admit I was very intrigued by Zelda. They (genderneutral pronouns are used) were faszinating and had really interesting thoughts. 🙂 But they care for Xander and despite a grumpy, moody behaviour they are sweet in their own way. 🙂
I also had to laugh a bit because of the name. I am not sure if the author planned this, if it was her intention but with naming they Zelda it’s like making a small pun.
[Note: the game the name comes from is called Zelda, a lot of people misname the game’s hero, Link, for Zelda, which is the princess to rescue].
Maybe it’s just coincidence and only the name was fitting because of the nerdy topic (naming a child after a video game), but I had to giggle about this potential pun. xD

If you expect heavy, hot and steamy graphic scenes, despite this is a book is about an artist and his drawings (kinda ironic ;)), there is no display of the affection in the “conservative” way. Means: you have high sensual encounter but in a different way. They are displayed with small touchings, no (french) kisses or only light pecks and the focus is on the person. I would dare say to call it “sensual sexual encounter”. To describe it without revealing too much of the particular scenes is a bit tough, so I keep it this vague.
It’s maybe a bit strange for the reader but I have to say: give it a try. Really. Open your mind for unconventional things like this.
The scenes are full of emotion and so hot, because they go right into the heart, touch you. And I only mention that brushes and paint can be used very creativity. 😉 Hot, really hot. :3
[Note: this isn’t in any meant as insulting, never planned to be ace-,grey- or demiphobic. With “unconventional” I mean the way of how “daily objects” are used in a sexual scene, the way how the character share their bond, nearly without touching each other or only lightly. On the other hand you don’t have to fear BSDM or a kinky use of those objects if you were wondering, too.]

The book is full of events, effecting the character’s lives and it’s a bit diffcult to catch everything in a review. I also won’t to give too much away. It’s really a journey you go with the character, the character development is amazing, you see it through the pages. The cultural mixes and the nerdy topic, also the different spectrums in sexuality shown by different character (we have gay, cishet, gray, ace, demi…) gives the book its depth.

I guess for some people this book isn’t fitting, because of the spectrum of sexuality or because they can’t relate to the Japanese topic and all the works etc. named. But everbody who loves this, everbody who is eager to explore new things, for those it’s an amazing book and simply beautiful.

5 out of 5 stars for this. Grab your copy, dive into this.

Review originally posted on my blog with added content on Mikku-chan / A world full of words

I'm speechless. Breathless. Overjoyed is maybe a word i would also use.
Now I am gonna confess that I knew absolutely nothing about this book before I started it, and I was happily surprised to find out that one of the characters is asexual (or somewhere on the spectrum). I have to admit that I'm pretty clueless when it comes to asexuality or anything really, that falls into the grey area of sexuality. It was huge! An incredible learning experience for me. I'm at a complete loss of words. The writing style, character development, plot... everything felt natural and easy to read. It captivated me, tickled me, enticed me, taught me. I cried, I laughed and I will keep reading this book and sharing it with everyone I meet. thank you.
Yes, there is no "traditional" sense of sexual content but the most intimate scenes between Xander and Skylar were..... surreal. The logical part of my brain tells me I have no way to truly understand and appreciate the way two such people can relate to each other.... but honest to everything good in this world, I found myself at the edge of my seat and totally breathless every stroke of that brush. I could equally feel that first "make out" through only hand touches and the significance it had to a character. Honestly, it was enlightening and so long! I loved it! I loved that story was so well developed and it didn't just automatically get into a relationship but where the characters actually got to know each other and grow together. There was so much love and acceptance in this book and I kept thinking. This is what I want my life to be, full of acceptance, love and courage.
I found the struggle each character had with their parents to be very relatable (at least to me) and I was thankful, so thankful to see a resolve and happy ending with them. It gives me hope. For myself. For others. I want to tell everyone about this book. I want everyone to read it, to buy it, to soak it in and realize that love is transcendent. It's not about your gender, or age, or color, or belief, or sexual orientation or classification. It's not. It just exists and it grows and it becomes something beautiful, like this book. A masterpiece.

4 Stars

There were aspects of this book that I absolutely loved and some that well, frankly, bored me to tears. I absolutely loved Xander and Skylar, but I'm not a fan of Manga or Anime and this book is filled with quite a bit of detailed conversations/talks on/about the subject and I just don't understand it and it really doesn't interest me.

I did love the relationship and romance portion of the story. Xander and Skylar fit one another well and although they do have things in common they come from completely different backgrounds, yet those differences complimented one another. I loved the patience and understanding they showed to each other. They were accepting of the others limitations and I absolutely loved watching them explore and even work past some of those barriers.

This story is well-written, but it was a really long book and as I said, a lot of it dealt with Manga. While that's not for me, I know plenty love it and will find this portion of the story fascinating. The author is obviously very well educated on the subject and it comes across in her writing.

This story also had some great secondary characters as well that were an amazing support system for both Skylar and Xander. Skylar and Xander had amazing chemistry and the intimacy between them was sweet and loving. I'd definitely recommend this story!

*copy provided to me by the author/publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review*

4 Stars!!!

This is my first ace book and while I've read a bit about it, I had no clue what to expect. I think Heidi Cullinan did a fantastic job with that and showing us the kind of intimacy that would work for both Skylar and Xander.

I adored Skylar and Xander. My heart broke I don't know how many times for Skylar, the sweet, poor little rich boy that was looking for love, for acknowledgment, for something that showed that he mattered. And then again for Xander, when his mother didn't put his needs nowhere near the same level she did with his stepfather and siblings. Skylar was steadfast and awesome and I just couldn't get enough of how perfect he was with Xander. Xander was grumpy and possessive. Xander was like Skylar' perfect counterpart, they just complemented each other. Where Skylar was outgoing, Xander was introverted, where Xander was more fierce, Skylar was charming. And really, both were a force to be reckoned with when they were trying to help each other and their little group of friends and family. I especially loved whenever Xander rushed to Skylar's defense, LOL, he was all fire and brimstone, no signs of shyness there.

I loved the secondary characters, Pamela, Unc, Sara, Cody and Zelda, especially. I wasn't too sure of Zelda at first, but they grew up on me. I hated Skylar's parents, especially Leighton, who was despicable! And even if Xander's mom had a nice turnaround there in the end, I wasn't too fond of her for most of the book, or of her husband, who was horrible, too.

All in all, Antisocial was a great read, although perhaps there were a few instances in which I was a tad bored with all the Manga details, but overall, it's a sweet, angsty ace romance that left me with a smile on my face and let's be honest here, you just can't go wrong with a Heidi Cullinan book. Very recommendable!

*** Copy provided to the reviewer via NetGalley for my reading pleasure, a review wasn't a requirement. ***

Where do I start with this one? I saw review after review cross my feed on Goodreads that said the book was long, the focus on Japanese culture killed it, and a lot that should have scared me away from the book. I am stubborn and it was a book that I could read immediately, so I gave it a shot. The only issue I was really worried about was appropriation of Japanese culture, which I think the book did. The non-Japanese characters were praying to Japanese gods (Kami) and were naming themselves after them at one point. That really irked me. When the talk was about manga, art, cherry blossoms, and the history of the kami, it was ok. When the characters actually actively started claiming the culture as their own, I started to get wigged out. 

I LOVED THIS BOOK. I stayed up until four in the morning to finish it. I have not stayed up late for a book in years. I was wide awake at four, just marveling in the book. The second I turned off my kindle I was out like a light. This book was the only reason I was awake. It was that good. There was just so much that made this book perfect. It did not feel long, the ending didn't feel forced, the ending was not rushed. All of the loose ends were tied neatly up. There was some unbelievable portions, but I glossed over them while reading while I normally obsess over those sorts of details and get lost. 

The characters developed into real people. I didn't like how dramatic the shift was for Skylar. It was a bit much, but I have also seen people make that dramatic of a shift in a very short time, so I know it happens. I just got really worried about him and I was getting annoyed with him. My annoyance didn't detract from my love of him or the story, it just added another layer of emotion. 

I loved, loved, loved that there was little to no discussion of Zelda's gender. They were just them. The pronoun was they and none of the characters batted an eye and it wasn't a central focus, the gender identity just was. I am so tired of books that beat me over the head with side characters being anything that isn't cis, white, male, and straight because of the long drawn out explanations that the author/editor deems required. I didn't care how Zelda got to where they got in their identity, they just were. It was so refreshing and perfectly executed. The book didn't give me Basic Identity 101, which would have killed the book for me. I like that the book met me as an equal and left any research up to me. It allowed someone like me, obsessed with sexuality and gender, not to have to sit through pages and pages of basics when I teach the subject. Zelda became a sort of mentor character despite not being perfect, which to me was much more realistic and necessary. None of the younger characters were perfect, there was one older character that was perfect. She deserves that title and reminds me of some of my favorite professors in college.

Can I marvel at the sex scenes for a while? They were majorly intense. These are some of the best sex scenes I have ever read. They are exactly what this book called for and exactly what I needed in my life. I don't want to spoil too much, but they were not what I was expecting which made them even more intense for me. They worked so perfectly. I was just complaining to a friend on Goodreads that I needed more books like this one, but I didn't expect to find it so easily. There was the heat, but it was so enlightening. I can't say anything else without ruining what I think is the best twist in a romance novel I have ever read. (If you are sex averse, you will still be ok with them. I can almost guarantee that. Just give it a shot.) 

The writing was gorgeous. I was never lost, nothing was ambiguous, there were no issues with The Pronoun Problem (IMPRESSIVE!). Just overall, I can't rave enough about this book. I have already sent a crazy number of texts to friends telling them to buy the book and I have ranted for a good hour to my partner about the book (perks of dating me).



5 out of 5 stars. I would recommend this book.

This book is different and so amazing because of it. Xander doesn't care what anyone thinks, Skylar cares too much and they need each other to create beautiful art. This book is deliciously long and follows them all the way from their random first meeting to their HEA. I love books where you get to see the MCs form a friendship first and you get that full experience here. They don't start out wanting to be friends, and Xander wants to avoid Skylar at all costs, but they just fit so well together to be anything but.

It's ironic, because I enjoy high heat books and actively avoid fade to black type books. To me the love scenes are an important part of the book and you miss out on a large part of the relationship if you skip it. This book had no sex scenes, it had achingly beautiful love scenes though, and I think it's better because of it. Even if you're a high heat aficionado, I really think this book will be just fine for you. This book is seriously like reading a lovegasm, a 341 page lovegasm. If you're a romance fan, do yourself a favor and pick this one up.

One of the things I liked most, beyond the hilarious side characters and Japanese themes, btw if you love anime/manga this is for you, was how they were basically a power couple. They were able to stand up to anyone and anything and always had trust in each other. I'd say that there was very little angst once they actually got together. They're both willing to fight for each other and their important causes and I think the social message there was nice as well.

So come on read this book, its fun and beautiful and if you're like me, you'll have a smile on your face the entire time.

Very Good, I really enjoyed this one. I really enjoy the authors writing and her way of writing. I enjoyed the characters, they felt real and they were adorable. I like LOVE the cover(!!!) have y'all see the cover, it is Ah-Mazing(!!!) I thought she done really well with this story.

Rating: 5+ out of 5

A single stroke can change your world.

Xander Fairchild can’t stand people in general and frat boys in particular, so when he’s forced to spend his summer working on his senior project with Skylar Stone, a silver-tongued Delta Sig with a trust fund who wants to make Xander over into a shiny new image, Xander is determined to resist. He came to idyllic, Japanese culture-soaked Benten College to hide and make manga, not to be transformed into a corporate clone in the eleventh hour.

Skylar’s life has been laid out for him since before he was born, but all it takes is one look at Xander’s artwork, and the veneer around him begins to crack. Xander himself does plenty of damage too. There’s something about the antisocial artist’s refusal to yield that forces Skylar to acknowledge how much his own orchestrated future is killing him slowly…as is the truth about his gray-spectrum sexuality, which he hasn’t dared to speak aloud, even to himself.

Through a summer of art and friendship, Xander and Skylar learn more about each other, themselves, and their feelings for one another. But as their senior year begins, they must decide if they will part ways and return to the dull futures they had planned, or if they will take a risk and leap into a brightly colored future—together.

I've loved this author and her stories just forever and for so many different reasons.  And I have many several 5 stars reviews of her stories.  Cullinan always was one of my baselines in for bringing in unusual yet thoroughly realistic characters and situations and letting me connect emotionally on deep levels with each and every one.  Yet once I finished Antisocial, I was stunned by it's beauty and its depth, Cullinan's handling of asexuality and the main characters relationship.  I think it's the best story she's written.  Even now Xander and Skylar, their transformation from, well, if not frenemies, strangers on campus, to friends to lovers with their own HEA is one that continues to resonate within me.

The warmth of Cullinan's style of writing is one that pulls a reader, this reader, intimately into her stories and lives of her characters.  Whether it's the damaged, artistic Xander or stressed, high-society Skylar Stone, the Greek with the silver tongue and closet of secrets, Cullinan gently ushers you into their minds and hearts.  She reveals the detritus of Stone's upbringing that's keeping him from growing into the person he can be, the same being said for Xander too.  Then uses the Pygmalion story in a wonderful reversal that will thread elements together and bring closure in an emotionally satisfying and joyous climax.

In between, we get an amazing exploration of what asexuality in different forms can mean to a couple, to a person or persons and to a romance/relationship. The scenes with simple touches gave me shivers of delight as her descriptions telegraphed what it meant to Xander, Skylar and both of them as couple so beautifully.  Each explore the fact that there's not just one "ace label" or two, but a spectrum of grey as it were.  Something other characters will or already understand.  Cullinan brings the element of asexuality and threads it throughout Antisocial in a number of ways, stunning, unexpected, and important ways.

A great plus?  The manga details and Japanese art history details that this story is laced with, like the woodcuts of Hokusai, seen to the right.  Finally, there is the cast of characters that surround and support Xander and Skylar, ones that I want to see so much more of.  All the tight members of the group from Lucky 7, especially Unc.  I would  plead with the author to bring them all back for more stories as I fell in love with all of them too.

But this is truly Xander and Skylar's story and it's in my top five of 2017.  The beauty of its story, its characters and relationship, the complexities of their romance, the growth and change each underwent in order for a future to be possible for them together.  Well, it still brings tears to my eyes and a glow to my heart.  I highly recommend this to you all.



Cover art by Natsukoworks, Cover design by Kanaxa Designs.  An absolutely perfect cover for an absolutely perfect story.  From the style, coloring and characters, its exquisite.

I don’t even know where to begin with this review because there are so many things I want to say, so I guess I will just jump right in and see what comes out.

This book spoke to me in a BIG way. And I am not referring to any of the art or manga or shrines that played a part in this story. I am talking about Skylar & Xander. I identified with Skylar like I have no other character, and while we are not the same (I am in no way a social person), we share enough similarities that I felt a real connection. With Xander, our only similarity is in shyness. Xander is an introvert and an antisocial person – I completely get that. I prefer my own company to that of others, mostly because I like silence and doing what I want to do.

As unlikely as it is to find your perfect partner, when you add in all the nuances that make Skylar and Xander unique – it’s even more amazing and perfectly romantic that they did indeed find each other. Out of all the billions of people there are on this planet, out of all the thousands of people who chose to attend Benten college, and out of those same thousands, for Xander’s art to be graffitied upon by members of Skylar’s fraternity – and for Skylar to be so mesmerized and enamored with said art – that these two should find each other is like Disney Fairy Tale magic.

I was just struck by how well suited these two are and as implausible as their coming together is (because real life just doesn’t always work out that way), I believed it. Author Heidi Cullinan really did an amazing job in bringing to life characters who don’t match society’s normative. I know this book will not be for everybody, but I hope people will still give it a chance. I was hesitant to read this myself because of the reviews I had read, it seemed the story was very Japanese centric and manga art (which I still don’t 100% understand). And yes, those elements are in this story. But it’s simply a means by which the characters communicate with each other. Xander’s art and Skylar’s love and appreciation of it is what brings them together.

This isn’t a light and easy read, but I never felt weighed down with it. From the moment I started this to the last word on page, I was just engrossed in these characters and the world Heidi created. This book is different from anything else I’ve ever read and that is what is so amazing! I mean, how many different ways can you write boy meets boy (or someone meets someone)? There needs to be a special hook that makes a book different, and this one had it for me.

Depending on how you define intimacy, this book has loads of intimacy. No, there is no penetrative sex, but they have something so much deeper than that (and pun totally not intended). Skylar is a mix between asexual, demi sexual and bisexual – Skylar himself has no clear definition of what he is but he doesn’t want a label beyond “Xander’s Partner” anyway. Xander is gay, however painfully shy and a virgin. Neither are completely comfortable with the idea of sex (though Xander does have some good fantasies 😉 ), and so they learn what the other is comfortable with – they talk, they set limits and they have some of the most meaningful encounters. I mean, holy cow! They made out in a car by just touching hands! That is sweet and on the surface intimate, but for these men – who’ve not been touched – it was everything.

I hope this isn’t the end for Skylar and Xander – I would love to read more about them and what the future brings them. Their friends and family, sigh. Well, the friends are deeply loyal and at times I felt their Kumbaya, sis-boom-ba, rah-rah-rah attitude was a little over the top (when Skylar goes to take his LSAT, he has a sort of panic attack and calls Xander for support/help. Skylar had to drive 3-4 hours away to take this test, and not only did Xander go, but the WHOLE gang! In two cars. They drove hours to hold Skylar’s hand and show their support. That was all just too excessive for me and I got my squinty eye out!). I liked their friends: Zelda, Sara, Unc, Pamela – the list goes on. As for their family, Skylar’s doesn’t deserve the name, and Xander’s mother is trying. I felt her to be a weak willed woman at first but she grew stronger as time went on.

The progression of Skylar from a well put together, clean cut and well groomed, calm and collected young man to a jittery, scruffy nervous young man was a surprise and I didn’t feel the transition between them was smooth. It seemed to come from nowhere yet I could see signs of it coming. It’s hard to explain. Skylar was suave and (this is going to sound dumb) Ken like. As Xander breaks down Skylar’s walls and Skylar feels more and more pressure about the LSATs, wanting his fathers approval, his sexual identity is in chaos, his love for Xander, his future is unclear – Skylar’s dependence on Xander grows and grows until Skylar can’t seem to function without him. I don’t understand how he became so…frail. I think on this and maybe come back to say more.

Xander is sort of the complete opposite. Xander, the curmudgeon, the antisocial artist. He bloomed under Skylar’s attention and friendship and then love. Xander has never really felt satisfaction or pride or the sense that he successfully created what his mind and spirit felt when it came to his art. But Skylar did and through him and his appreciation, Xander let go. He stopped thinking and just did it. The manga and the Japanese culture – all that went over my head – but I could still appreciate it in the way it made the characters shine.

I highly recommend everybody read this and really think about what this book is about. It’s not always about sex, sometimes it’s about intimacy.

Wow did I love this book. I started recommending it to people when I wasn't even a third of the way in. I doubt my review will do it justice.

One of the many things I loved was that it was so DIFFERENT. I've not read many books that feature an ace main character. A lot of romance books rely on sex to move the relationship forward. Not so when he is asexual. I really think the characters need to connect on a deeper level to acheive that chemistry. That was done so well in this book.

The portrayal of no only a main character as ace, but also a supporting character that was non-binary, was a breath of fresh air. These identities need more representation in books!

The book delved into Skylar's background and why he is so eager to please. And while there was some talk of Xander's background- there could definitely have been more. More to explain why he was antisocial. More to explain why he was angry. Just more.

There is a TON of manga and Japanese culture talk in this book. A lot. It was a bit overwhelming as I have zero knowledge of both. What I retained was interesting, but a lot of it was a bit like the adults in a Peanuts cartoon.

So even though there was quite a bit that I didn't love, some things like bugged me and a couple of continuity issues, I loved the overall story and representation of people on the gray spectrum that I have to recommend it.

I'm gonna be odd man out on this. I had some major issues. This started off really strong and I was enjoying cranky Xander and very serious Skylar getting to know each other. They were entertaining to watch as they bumbled around and became friends and then finally admitted they liked each other.

As it went on though I started feeling like I was reading a YA book and I deliberately don't read those for a reason. While these two were in their early twenties (21 & 23) they had zero relationship experience. This was very much a first love story. They were very shy and very sweet and very reserved and I felt like I was reading about teens. Since I'm a *bit* older than that and have tweens of my own & it kind of squicks me out. I know a lot of adults read YA w/no issues but it just is a no go for me. So, while it wasn't technically YA, it really, really felt that way.

On a positive note on how the relationship was done, I felt like the author did a great job on the asexual representation of one of the MC's and it done in a way I haven't read before so that was interesting to me.

I also felt like this was too long. I found myself losing interest by 60% and I felt like things could have been wrapped up quicker. It was hard to push myself through the last 20%. I barely finished this.

Both of the above mentioned things though could have been overlooked but this last one was really a big issue for me. I hate writing reviews and pointing out things that I find offensive or inappropriate. I'm not a big fan of the morality police when it comes to books and I know I've personally rolled my eyes a few times at other people's reviews in the past when they bring up things I don't agree with. That being said, I just can't bypass how icky the Japanese obsession by these characters made me feel. I don't read magna or anime but I get how people love it. I liked how the students worked on a magna magazine and talked about series and artists they loved. That I understood. But the whole school being based on the love of Japanese culture, the nonstop talk about it, life goals being to move to Japan, having lunches made into Bento boxes and most disturbingly, getting turned on in sexual situations because one's partner speaks Japanese, just skirted too closely to cultural appropriation for me. (And maybe it didn't just skirt it. Maybe it jumped right over that line.)

So......this was really well written and I think my complaints might be things that are just an issue for me. Most of the other reviews are really good so I might just not be the right audience.

**ARC provided through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review**