Jamie Ivey creates a stage in this book for others to sing. By sharing her story in such a way as to make the reader feel like your chatting with a dear friend, she is not only sharing who she is but how we can support and help each other as women and as humans. Even more, she brings to light how God sees each of us and loves us anyway! This book was so eye opening to the ideas of vulnerability, how to have courage ourselves but also how to support others to be bold as well. The community that can rise out of a book like this will be powerful. For anyone who has felt alone, ashamed, like there wasn’t a place for them; to anyone who has walked into church and felt like they needed to hide their questions or frustrations; to anyone who felt like no one would love them if others truly knew; for anyone who wants to reach out with empathy but doesn’t always know how, this one is for you!!!

If You Only Knew is a book about vulnerability, past mistakes and overcoming them. It is about how the Scripture frees us and takes our mistakes into Freedom, a new life in CHRIST relying on HIM. We are to be honest in our lives. He will work with us. Is it all that what we are looking for? Oh what a wonderful book of helpful, hopeful stories.

This was my favorite book of 2017, topping even the likes of Jen Hatmaker. Jamie Ivey poured her heart, soul, and truth out in a way that will resonate with every woman. No matter what stage of life you are in or what story you have lived, this book will speak to you.

I must commend Ivey for having the courage to share her story with the world. There are few women, especially those within Christian circles, who would dare voice their struggles with addiction and sexual promiscuity, let alone put them into a book for the world to read. Her bravery gives hope to women who might otherwise believe the lie that they are alone in their struggles and a disappointment in the eyes of God.

Judging by her wildly popular podcast and frequent status as a speaker, you’d never guess her personal history did not match her present success. You’d also never know that she still struggles even now with her past.

Even if you don’t have “a past” and you’re confident in your faith journey, this book will help you develop an even deeper sense of identity and purpose. No matter what our personal stories, we are each called to share with others and this book will help you considerate your role.

Claiming this as my favorite book of 2017 is not an exaggeration. I felt both relieved and uneasy as I read through the pages. There were moments when I felt like she was telling my story and others when I was annoyed because it felt like she was pushing me to be even more honest with myself and others. There will definitely be times when you are uncomfortable as you read this book. Even in your most uncomfortable parts, Ivey includes truth with an air of compassion. She tells her story in a way that is relatable and gives you hope in how your story can also be used for greater good.

This book gives hope to all the “good church girls” who struggled to live up to expectations they couldn’t achieve and still today carry with them the shame of their past choices. She says all the things that we think but are too afraid to share. Her words take away the power of shame and help us understand what healing can look like. “Most of the women seated around you on Sundays, most likely including the woman who’s sitting there wearing your shoes and outfit and smiling to people across the room, are afraid that if others knew their struggles, they’d be disqualified from doing the work of God.”

In everything she shares, Ivey always brings the reader back to the way that God has redeemed her story. This isn’t as much a story about her as it is the way that God was persistent in her life and has given her the voice and opportunity to impact a new generation of women. She challenges each women to use their voice and their story to impact their communities, to share their redemption, and give hope to others.

I received an advanced copy of this book from the Publisher.

I love being part of Jamie Iveys launch team. I feel this book not only brings hope to it’s readers but raw honesty from someone that was so broken at different points in her own life. I found her by accident over a year ago and I’m glad I did. Her story is relevant to anyone
Willing to take the time to read it. She lets the reader know there is mercy and grace found in Jesus. I saw so much good to come out of this story the family and friends that accept you for who you are. I can appreciate the fact that it’s never easy to speak about our personal struggles for fear of being unaccepted. Jamie reminds all of us to embrace those around us when they’re struggling and be their strength. Jamie speaks to you like a family member or a trusted friend. Definitely worth the read. Makes me want to be a better and more accepting person. Bravo .. Jamie Ivey thank you for sharing your story.

This week I read the book If You Only Knew by the popular podcast host of The Happy Hour, Jamie Ivey. While I was familiar with Jamie from her podcast, this book was different from what I anticipated. It’s no secret that she is a Christian or that she is married to a pastor. However, I was surprised by her vulnerability and openness in sharing her testimony.

And, to that end, that is what this book is essentially. It is her testimony. Readers learn who she was before she began to follow Christ and who she is today. She reveals the secrets and hidden struggles that she was sure “if you only knew,” you would judge her for.

Jamie was highly dependent on admiration from the opposite sex, which led to her making some unwise decisions that hurt her heart. For example, she was sexually promiscuous and became pregnant while attending a Baptist college and miscarried. However, what made it even more difficult over time was the fact that she felt she had to hide this part of her story.

For those who have struggled under the weight of hidden sin or have looked for love in all the wrong ways, you may find Jamie’s testimony healing. She speaks openly and continually offers readers grace and reminds them that no one is perfect.

My one caveat in recommending this book to everyone is that is specifically geared to a Christian audience (as I’m sure it was intended). With this being said, I do not know how much of it would resonate with (or even make sense to) someone who does not go to church or has not read the Bible, as it is full of verses and Christianese. In other words, I wouldn’t necessarily give it to just anyone struggling.

And, there were several times when I highlighted things she said. For example, here are a few quotes I loved:

“We’re either the church people that others feel too ashamed to be themselves around, or we’re the bottled-up people whose sense of failure or inadequacy makes us want to hide or maybe hate you.”

“Struggling through your faith is not an indication of lack of faith; struggling through your faith is an indication that you are fighting for your faith.”

“When we allow ourselves to be a safe place for women to confess their struggles, we are imitating Jesus.”

“What if people knew all the moments of my past that I am not proud of? What if you really knew me, the parts that I’ve hoped to forget and worked to conceal? For so long, I was so afraid that if you only knew the mess I am so good at creating in my life, then things would be different. In many ways, my greatest fear was what you might think of me if you only knew the whole story,” (from the publisher).

Those words—“if you only knew”—paralyze and isolate women every hour of every day. We create masks to hide those things that we believe define us: our pasts, our mistakes, and deep dark desires of our hearts.

For years, Jamie Ivey has cultivated an environment of vulnerability and grace in her podcast, “The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey.” Now, she shares her own struggles with “if you only knew” and how God transformed her deepest fears into opportunities for gospel community.

Reading “If You Only Knew” was like sitting across from a friend with a mug full of steaming hot coffee. Jamie wrote these words with tenderness and vulnerability that shone through in every single chapter; she used her story of shame, discovery, and transformation to communicate vital gospel truths. Jamie says, “When we hide the mess we’ve been through, we also hide the redemption that God has lavishly poured on us. We can’t proclaim His grace until we expose our mess,” (Location 1208 in Kindle version).

I especially enjoyed Jamie’s challenges to the church and its leaders. In an age of #metoo and #churchtoo, transparency and openness about sin has never been more important. She claims, “No one should be left wondering if those in positions of spiritual authority are above having any struggles. If the leaders of your church have never admitted to sin struggles from their platforms, you might need to find some new leaders,” (Location 1363 in Kindle version).

Jamie continues to show that she is a leader worth following; not only does she offer the good news of the gospel and its radical transformative power, but she illustrates it at work in her own life. She lives out her roles of pastor’s wife, mom, Christian podcaster, and all-around influencer with compassion, courage, and joy that is simply contagious.

My only critiques of Jamie’s writing are its repetition and conversational style. She speaks with confidence and persuasion but that doesn’t exactly translate to her writing in the book. I love that she has taken such a step of faith in telling her story in print, but her writing style is just not up to par with her vocal communication. Even so, her heart and the gospel shines through.

I already loved Jamie from “The Happy Hour” but now I enjoy her even more. Knowing the journey she walked with God to get here is encouraging for my own spiritual life and my pursuit of authentic community.


(This review will be posted on my blog, The Novel Endeavor, on Tuesday, January 30.)

I am an avid listener of Jamie Ivey’s podcast, and I was so excited to hear her story. I could hear Jamie’s voice as I read her words, and her story of grace and redemption was inspiring. I will certainly recommend to others.

I have been a fan of Jamie Ivy's for a while now and listen to her podcast, The Happy Hour, every week. I loved reading her book, If You Only Knew, and getting a glimpse into her story. She speaks with a vulnerability and honesty that is refreshing and left me feeling empowered to be able to share my own story with others.

Jamie, I am so thankful for you, your story, and your willingness to be vulnerable with us. I've been a big fan of the Happy Hour for a while, so I've been looking forward to this one. So excited for all the Lord is doing in you and through you!

I love how candid, hilarious and authentic Jamie is with sharing her story. Thanks for giving language to those who need it! Enjoy this read!

Unlike many reviewers, I had no idea who Jamie Ivey was prior to receiving this book for review and had never listened to her podcast. I feel that I got a chance to get to know her through reading "If You Only Knew" and appreciated the book for its vulnerability and Gospel-centered message—I mean truly Gospel-centered, as in she tied the work of Christ back into every mistake she's made and lesson she's learned—and for that reason alone I would recommend this book because I believe that God can use it to help free many people. She was truly preaching in a lot of sections. However, my appreciation for the work is not because it was well-written (I thought the writing style was quite flat), but an acknowledgement of the value of her story and her willingness to tell it. Many people need to read it and find that they're not alone, and now countless people will because of the author's faithfulness.

Jamie Ivy is a master at getting people to share their real stories on her podcast, The Happy Hour. Now learn her story. If You Only Knew, will have you laughing, crying, and nodding your head and saying, “me too.” By revealing herself, Jamie reminds us just how similar we all are. This is a great book to read alone or in a group.

I think everyone’s got a skeleton or two in their closet. I know I certainly do. This isn’t the time or place to really talk about the bad I’ve done in my life, but, suffice to say, it’s enough that I was curious about Jamie Ivey’s If You Only Knew. The book — while aimed more so at women readers — is about all those sordid mistakes you’ve made in the past, and how you might be able to come through them to a place of peace. Given that the author is a conservative Christian from Texas, you know the answer to the predicament: Jesus.
I’m not going to admonish the author for her beliefs, because that’s not how I roll. But after reading John Shelby Spong’s upcoming book Unbelievable, I had a hard time reconciling God and/or Jesus as a supernatural person living in the clouds up in the sky. This version of God is sort of what Ivey presents to us, so, whether you like it or not, that aspect of the book is something you’re going to have to sit with. That said, there are still parts of If You Only Knew that are relevant to everyone, no matter what your leanings are in the culture wars. Take away the atonement theology and doctrine of sin that Ivey believes in, and you’d have a book that liberals like myself wouldn’t have too much of a hard time swallowing. (That said, I think this is a book best suited for conservative evangelicals.)
Ivey has a folksy style of writing that is woman-to-woman, and she does have a fascinating story to tell. Being a conservative Christian, she talks of her regrets of becoming sexually active at the age of 16, getting pregnant twice in her late teens and early 20s, and suffering two heart-wrenching miscarriages. You can see, given her background, why her story may be problematic to share. At the same time, progressive Christians like me may feel for the author, because this “shame” (her words) that she’s lived with really isn’t all that bad at all. If she didn’t live in a patriarchal conservative Christian culture, she may have realized that birth control (rather than trying to abstain, which is what her church taught her) may have been a viable option. If Ivey lives with any shame, it should be that the very religion that has given her her freedom from her past also saddled her with poor education around expressing her sexuality in a healthy way at a younger age.
I really wanted to reach out to the author and tell her, “The pain and torment of suffering miscarriages aside, your story really isn’t all that horrible.” There are far worse “sins” (again, the author’s terminology) to commit. In all her sexual encounters, for example, she was in a monogamous relationship. For two, and I lightly kid here, she never put an icepick between the eyes of any of her lovers. I don’t want to make light of the fact that she lost two children, but, really, is having pre-martial sex a really bad thing? My take is that God has got bigger fish to fry when it comes down to it: what you do in bed and when and who you do it with shouldn’t really be an issue with God if you’re consenting adults.
That all said, there are parts of If You Only Knew that are astounding for their honesty. The part of the book where Ivey spends some time talking about her addiction to pornography as a woman is startling, if not refreshing to hear. I also liked the way Ivey talked about being vulnerable with other people, which allowed her to really move into a more loving, committed relationship with the man she would eventually marry. Beyond theological leanings, my only complaint about If You Only Knew is that Ivey can be a bit jokey at times — probably in a move to lighten the mood a little on what would otherwise be a pretty dead serious topic. It strikes the reader, though, that the author might be lacking a little confidence in the story she’s weaving, but, given her background and the audience she’s probably really writing for (ie. evangelicals), one can see how humor might be needed to defuse the powder keg she is lighting with her tale.
Also noteworthy is the author’s talk of wearing letters that she’s pinned to herself, even if it’s a scarlet “W” for whore. It’s a stark reminder that we are probably most judgmental of ourselves, and that’s something that everyone needs to hear — no matter their theological or political leanings. Thus, even though parts of If You Only Knew weren’t really for me — I don’t believe that Jesus died for my sins, thanks, because that would mean that God is a punitive God, and who needs a punitive God in their lives, right? — there were still some takeaways. In a sense, If You Only Knew reminds us that we are all worthy of being redeemed for the wrongs we’ve done, and there actually aren’t any real wrongs that you can do that aren’t forgivable to some degree.
In the end, If You Only Knew is for those who have the skeletons in their closet (probably you) and still hold dear to conservative doctrines of the church (maybe not you). Though it doesn’t present a version of God that is aligned with my beliefs, at no point does Ivey judge — so neither should I. Read this book, then, if you want to hear one woman’s story of being at inner war with herself and how she was able to move past that. It may not be for everyone, but If You Only Knew is worth reading for those who have secrets locked away, and are wondering how to bring them out into the open to fully banish them.

Jamie's honesty and vulnerability is unlike most other books within this genre. I found that parts of this book were very refreshing and uplifting, while other parts were convicting and somber. This is truly a story of redemption and optimism!

I have been a fan of Jamie Ivy's podcast "The Happy Hour" for a long time so I was eager to read this book from the moment I heard she was writing it. I really had no idea about her life outside of the podcast and I found her story captivating and frankly a little shocking at times. She indeed was a very lost soul who, upon finding Jesus, transformed not only who she was but who she believed herself to be. Jamie has an incredible sense of humor and a very authentic and original voice in her writing that made this book very easy and enjoyable to read. Jamie is nothing short of real and I give her incredible props for putting herself out there with the message that you too can find yourself no matter how far gone you feel you are. My one negative with the book was that it ended! I wanted more!! Jamie really needs a sequel because there is so much more to her life when that last chapter ends and I would love to read her journey further. I received an e-copy of this book for my fair and honest review.

Jamie Ivey is so real and extremely transparent in this book. I don't know that I have ever read a book from a Christian author that has been more real and authentic. However, I found myself hanging on for some crazy big secret or story. Her testimony is very powerful. However, maybe a full introduction at the start would suffice.

I've been a fan of Jamie Ivey through Instagram and her podcast, and was pleasantly surprised to see her voice and personality coming through clearly in her first book. If Only You Knew is her journey as a Christian growing up in the church, but not having a transformed life until she went through many hardships. She gives so much hope to Christians who believe the lies that they are screw ups and can't be open and vulnerable to others. My hope is that her bravely opening up about her past, others will feel comfortable seeking safe relationships where they can be vulnerable as well.

I really really enjoyed this book and Jamie's refreshing honesty about her journey. She shares her story in a way that encourages others to do the same. It was raw, humble, funny, and most of all it points people to Jesus. I was reminded again and again that there is no shame or guilt when we run towards the Father.

I pray and believe this book will help many other women find freedom. Thank you, Jamie for sharing your story and inviting us to your time on the Happy Hour In these pages.

Finally an honest and refreshing Christian author who takes us on a journey of redemption. I LOVED Jamie's book. I was highlighting, underlining, laughing, and crying throughout every chapter. It was so refreshing to hear a woman open up about a real past and topics that don't usually appear in Christian circles or the church. I felt Jamie's pain, her heartache and the freedom she experienced in Christ as her life changed. Thank you for being brave - for opening up and sharing your beautiful story!

I've been a long time listener of The Happy Hour with Jamie Ivey. She brings the same humor and authenticity from her podcast into her book. Because I've listened to the majority of her podcast episodes I was familiar with many of the life experiences she shares in this memoir, but familiarity doesn't diminish the impact of the truth she shares about the freedom we can experience through Jesus. She is real about herself and the gospel.
Jamie's thoughts on "sin shock" were especially meaningful and I'll be thinking about how it effects the way I love others for quite a while.