I read books about people with different backgrounds, races, sexual orientations, etc. so that I can learn about a variety of experiences. Moore's story could not be more different than my own - he grew up impoverished in New Jersey as a black, gay youth. But his struggles to accept both himself and the circumstances he was born into are universal. I truly admire Moore's ability to fully examine his life, both his achievements and the mistakes he regrets. I did struggle a bit with the jumps in time and topic. I would have loved if the book was separated by theme (his dad's violence, the history of police violence in the US, his educational journey) instead of this progression, which felt a bit rambling and muddled at times. Overall, an inspirational and informative read.

I absolutely love this. It touches on SO many social justice issues about which I'm passionate, and it's overall just a really incredible story.

I think books are the only way we'll know stories of people we've never met, and may never meet. This book is a like a memoir that tries to introduce you to one life and all the lives connected to it that shape it. I began this book expecting it to be a little like Between the World and Me, but it was wonderfully different, Even then there seemed to be a shared cultural history in both books. i highly recommend it to anyone who is trying broaden their horizon and understanding of the world.

Darnell Moore is only in his mid 40s, but his life is definitely already memoir worthy. He is black and gay, and grew up in a poor neighbourhood. There was crazy strong love in his family, but also violence, poverty and addiction. Moore is now an activist, most recently involved in the Black Lives Matter movement. He tells his own story, and also comments more broadly about race, sexuality, class, family and education. Everything he has to say is interesting, but I especially liked his section dealing with his early education. He was a bright kid in an underfunded school. He fought for recognition as a strong student, and eventually made his way into a private school on a scholarship. He doesn’t tell readers this to bring attention to his brilliance or merit, but rather to emphasize the unfairness of how hard he had to fight and how unique he had to be to get what should be normal and accessible to all poor black kids. He has a lot to say about many other issues. He mixes the personal with the political in a way that works well. Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an opportunity to read an advance copy.

No Ashes in the Fire: Coming of Age Black and Free in America by Darnell L. Moore

I’m pretty much in love with reading memoirs by Black people right now. Doing so, keeps reassuring me that we, as a Black people, are not a monolith and our diversity is something to be celebrated. I want to celebrate Moore after reading his memoir. I want to celebrate him and the amount of growth he experienced from being a young insecure teen, bullied by the other kids in the neighborhood to being an accomplished sexually fluid man who advocates for the rights of Black people and the LGBT community.

It takes a lot of courage to express your truth. Moore’s truth is one filled with overcoming circumstances and learning to accept oneself. Moore had to deal with the physical abuse of his mother, understanding his queerness and levying that with his faith. His is a unique story and I really enjoyed the detaile he was willing to include. It showed a level of honesty and introspection that I didn’t expect. The moments I found most sincere were his thoughts about his position in the church and how his position in the patriarchy affected the way he loved and treated others. Moore was able to describe how and why in such a succinct matter of fact way that can only be a credit to not only introspection but genuine growth and a willingness to change.

I would definitely recommend this book. It’s a singular experience that I feel many would be able to relate. I found Moore’s writing to be exceptional in his descriptive and nuanced style. His story is one that I am grateful I was exposed to. I’ve learned from him and his experience. These are the stories everyone needs to be reading. The stories that may be extremely different from our own but refuse to let us “other” them because they are steeped in the truth of their lived experiences.

Thank you NetGalley for this advanced eGalley of No Ashes in the Fire by Darnell L. Moore.

I always hesitate when I'm asked to rate a memoir because it's a hard thing to rate the way a person writes his/her/their truth. You simply cannot judge a story, or the way it's told, because who are you to do so?

If anything, I give any and every one who lays themselves bare 5-stars because that is something that's hard to do--especially when you're a black, gay, man in America.

No Ashes in the Fire is Moore's account of how he has gradually escaped the patriarchy, the aura of black masculinity, and some of his own inner demons to become a champion and activist for those within the black community, and beyond.

His ups and downs are painfully detailed, and it's clear that sometimes, even now, he has to remind himself the path he's own was meant to be.

Was he always comfortable in his skin? Not always, but his journey from self-hatred to self love, and learning how to both give and accept the love he's been given needs to be heard--especially by the young, black, boys of today.

It's also important to note the love Moore speaks of isn't relegated to only those black boys who've accepted themselves as gay, bi-, or otherwise, but to the black boys, in general, for whom self-love is a foreign concept.

"No Ashes in the Fire" is one man's journey to hell and back. A man who has lived to tell about his experience in hopes that someone else might benefit.

A solid, raw, and powerful read.

4.5 stars

"Memory is a tricky force, especially when brutality, poverty, self-hatred, and many other unseen hands, which turn beautiful people into the monsters and victims, dictate what we remember."

Wow! This was a very eloquent, courageous, personal, and beautifully written memoir. This first thing that got my attention was his beautiful writing, followed closely by the courage and strength it took to be so open and honest.

Darnell Moore was once a frightened young man living in a home filled with domestic violence and uncertainty. He was fourteen years old when three boys from his neighborhood tried to set him on fire. Imagine for a minute just how frightening that must have been. To have gasoline poured over you and to watch as someone attempts to light match after match. I cannot even begin to image how frightening that must have been for him. Today he is an award-winning writer, activist, and a leader in the Movement for Black Lives.

No Ashes in the Fires details his life growing up in Camden, New Jersey in the 70's to his life now in the present. His parents were teenagers when he was born, and he details his upbringing and his families struggles. One of the parts of this book which shined for me was when he was describing his father's hands. Moore eloquently showed how his father's hands could be tender and loving, such as when he showed Darnell how to properly bathe and clean his body or when they were at the community pool and his father was teaching him to swim, and yet those same tender and loving hands could inflict pain and damage when used to hit and punch his wife (Darnell's mother). How he struggled with the concept of someone being both loving and abusive.

Darnell also talks in detail about his sexuality. How he was bullied because his peers thought that he was gay, how he experimented sexually in secret, how he sought out connection, love and sex. How he didn't feel safe and tried to keep his sexual orientation a secret. Later in the book he shared how he came out to his Mother and learned that she always knew.

"Her acceptance was more healing than any prayer, more uplifting than any group counseling session, more powerful than any force of hate I internalized."

The Author does not stop there, he details racism, a health issues he experienced when he was younger, identity, domestic violence, family, community, hope, determination, acceptance, love, equality, sexual orientation, and self-love. He opens the pages of his life, so to speak, he lays it bare, for us to read - the good, the bad and the ugly. He shows us the event in his life that lead him to be the man he is today. His writing is deeply personal and beautiful.

I highly recommend this book.

Thank you to Perseus Books and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Very inspirational...book of family, life’s ups and downs. Bullies, abuses all relayed with out hate and/or anger.

Wonderfully written, beautiful, raw, and difficult, this is an important memoir that explores and bravely amplifies voices that we need. I think this is a very powerful and necessarily uncomfortable look at how far we have to go, and what is overlooked far too often in society. Very moving.

This book is a fascinating memoir about growing up in a poor, Black, and gay in America. The book thoughtfully expresses what it means to be each of these things individually and also what it means when they intersect. This book is honest and raw and it opened my eyes to an experience I can only experience through the written word. After the first few pages I was worried that the book was going to be a little too "wordy" and repetitive but in the opening few chapters the writing comes into its own and the book becomes a beautiful meditation on a hidden life that has finally found its way to be open and free.

No Ashes in the Fire is both a memoir from a gay black male growing up both poor, traumatized and loved in Camden, and a social commentary on being black, gay, queer, hiding, and out. As a writer, Moore is honest, intense, and passionate. In the prologue he says, "Every word and every sentence that follows is an attempt to recover the many smiles and moments of joy hiding behind he walls trauma left." True to his words, Moore leaves the reader with the hope that our humanity, our ability to love each other is the "salve, the source, and the water that quenches the fire."

An insightful and honest story of a young black lad, growing up in Camden. A very rough neighborhood where his is bullied and at one point almost set on fire He discovers he has a sexual preference for boys. He tries everything to keep his desires a secret as he feels it is wrong and begs god to make him "normal" Written with such strong emotion and honesty it helps the reader understand the tremendous torment and self hate that can occur because much of society expects heterosexuality. He is fortunate to have a supporting loving family. He attends college but does not apply himself, rather is totally distracted by his sexual desires.. What he achieves later in the book is awesome and to be highly commended. Well work the read - excellently written.

Darnell Moore has no doubt led a tumultuous, brave, fascinating, heroic life. However, this book doesn't really do it justice. It felt stilted at times, and it seemed like a lot of the sections were edited in a random order. What is an interesting life read a little boring at times.

Outstanding book. This is a book that should be read by all. This book tell us of the story of Mr.Moore's life. What this man endured to become the man that he is today is a testimony to strength and resolve. I enjoyed reading about his family as well. It was hard to read some of the things that were done to the author, but I am glad he included it, as to show how some humans think when they are looking at something they may not understand or have compassion for. I feel the author gave it to us straight with no chasers. Kudos to you Mr. Moore. Much respect to you. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and the publisher for allowing me to read the ARC of this awesome book in return for my honest review.