The words we use build a frame around our lives. What is the picture inside your frame?

In Reframing the Soul by Gregory Spencer, our words are given the importance they’re due. “We label, we name, we frame all of our experiences, past, present, and future. We give words to our inner and outer worlds. In doing so, we construct a kind of home we carry with us.”

When we remember the past, we don’t do so with perfect clarity. We individualize the frame to fit us. When we look at the present, we do so through our own personal lenses. And when we think about the future, again we’re framing it based on our experiences and worldview.

Spencer doesn’t suggest that the goal is to frame everything positively. He’s not trying to convince us to put our spin on things. But he does want us to see that every word is a window.

“Since every word is a window, we are all called to examine our speech, our conversation and writing, to ask whether the view out a particular window is worth our gaze, whether our THAT should actually be a THIS.”

Throughout the book, Spencer helps us frame our world in more appropriate ways. He uses a method called the four essentials of the soul:

* Remembering the past with gratitude
* Anticipating the future with hope
* Dwelling within ourselves in peace
* Engaging with others in love

Spencer relates the story that a blogger, reflecting on her parenting, noticed she always told her kids, “Have fun!” when they walked out the door. And when they returned, “Did you have fun?” Until she realized: her framing was reinforcing a worldview that everything should be entertaining and highly pleasurable.

And we all know, life isn’t always about fun.

Jesus talked about measuring our words. In Matthew 5:22, it’s recorded that Jesus said, “Whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”

“Though Jesus doesn’t mean that our words are all that matters, he does mean that our words matter.”

And so I recommend the words of Gregory Spencer in Reframing the Soul. He brings a needed emphasis on how we’re framing our lives. And a clearer focus on choosing to frame them better.

“Yet, no matter how severe our circumstances, we have choices about how we frame things.”

My thanks to Net Galley for the review copy of this book

In this book, the author helps you evaluate how you talk and think about your life and why that matters. He claims that the way in which we frame an event, for example as a catastrophe or an opportunity, has an influence on our actions, feelings and the well-being of our souls.

The concept of framing and reframing is not that easy to understand. Even with a background in linguistics and literary studies, I would have appreciated some more precise explanations, especially for those readers that havve no prior knowledge about reframing. I would have also preferred more elaborations on how reframing is present in Scripture and why reframing is relevant for Christians.

It has all become more clear to me after I was able to apply the concept of reframing to an event in my own life, but I still think that many parts in this book, despite the examples, were too vague for me.

I think that if you are interested in the applicability of reframing for your everyday life, and, ideally, you have already heard about reframing, this book might be useful for you. It could also be used in academic settings and counselling maybe. But for those with no prior knowledge, it might need a few more explanations.

I was gripped by this book. I found the way Gregory Spencer described the way we all "frame" memories very helpful.
Several wise nuggets - two quoted below, many more in the book:
"You only have to forgive once. To resent, you have to do it all day, every day. You have to keep remembering all tge bad things"
"Gratitude isn't about lying to make things better than they were. It's about appreciating whatever can be appreciated - and most things can."

I read the whole book and was delighted that the Reframing with the Saints exercise and discussion questions at the end provide prompts for reflection.
A book that encourages awareness of self, and others as we all. live in harmony,
A book to read, and re-read.
A book to recommend to others - I think this would be a great resource for anyone with a pastoral or counselling role.

When self talk decides who I am, it is time for me to vacate.