Cover Image: How to Be a Perfect Christian

How to Be a Perfect Christian

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A very funny book I would recommend to any Christian strong enough in their faith to poke fun at the foibles of us and our churches. We all will find something we identify with in this book!

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I liked it pretty well overall. It is amusing and sobering at the same time. Many of the statements are so true in the book that they are hard to find actually funny as they step on everyone's toes, including mine at times. They don't always imply that you should change your methodology as much as prompt you to examine your attitude and reasoning behind that methodology. It makes you examine the motive behind why you do what you do, is it just because it makes me FEEL holy? Is my practice actually biblically derived? Or is it a personal conviction, such as whether I should use the KJV Bible or the NIV? Is worship just a feeling? Is the goal of a church to make people happy and comfortable with themselves? Do I go to church to serve or to be served? All in all, It really makes you think about why we do what we do as Christians.

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Christian satire, hilarious snippets of exaggerated truths... I thought it was funny, though I know some will find making fun of themselves some how immoral--I don't.

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Thank you NetGalley for the opportunity to read this book for my honest review. I've read lots of Babylon Bee articles and found most of them to be funny so thought I'd give this a try. While there are definitely funny parts there are also several places that the satire is taken a bit too far.

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I don't live in The Chosen Land and I have never been to a super-spiritual church, so I guess I'm doomed.
This book is written for US Americans. Here in Europe, most local churches are smaller, don't have smoke machines and large worship bands. I've only ever been in one church where lights were dimmed while we were singing, and even they didn't have a smoke machine.

Even for a non- US American, there are some really funny parts in this book. For example, chapter 5, looking very spirtual online, or chapter 8, quarantining your home. But some chapters are less funny, and some points are belabored to the point that they aren't funny any more.
There are some inconsistencies and contradictions in there too. For example, the person joining the church seems to be looking for something vey "hip", but once he starts getting down to business in chapters 6 and on, it seems like he ought to be in a church that delivers more doctrine and less "your best life now" talks. The homeschooling, complementarian family with 28 kids doesn't go to a megachurch with a contemporary worship band and a pastor who wears skinny jeans.
Another example: Perfect Christian in the making is told to scour the small group leader's home for any signs of alcohol or questionable non-Christian entertainment, but then he's supposed to bring up the latest episode of some TV show to argue his point during Bible study.

I think I get the point of the book, but at times, the exaggerations and the use of the name of God and Jesus in vain were very annoying. Three stars from me.

I received a reviewer's copy from WaterBrook and Multnomah via Netgalley. Thank you!

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How to be a Perfect Christian is satire about modern day Christianity. There were so many lines I highlighted. One of my favorites was, “Whether you’re watching Christian movies in which the world lights up like a big ball of fire and only Kirk Cameron is left standing or you’re reading a bonnet ripper about Jebediah the Amish farmer casting his steely gaze at Abigail the spinster, remember to turn your mind off and let your own efforts rack up credit in heaven with the Lord. Don’t think critically about any of these things. They have been approved by cultural Christianity, so they’re undoubtedly wholesome.” I laughed so hard I had tears.

The book does make you think about how Christianity is portrayed in our culture and that is sad. I’ve grown up in the church my whole life and while I would feel comfortable in the environment, I can easily understand why many don’t. I will give a warning and say that this book may be offensive to some believers. For example, if you are offended by John Christ’s posts on social media, you will more than likely be offended by this book. However, if you love John Christ, this book is perfect for you.

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I received a complimentary ebook copy from the publisher via NetGalley.

Readers who are not familiar with 21st century non-denominational church culture will likely not "get" this book. Satire only works when the audience thoroughly understands what is being skewered, and thus can laugh out loud with honesty. (Although I don't think some of the humor-impaired church ladies of my childhood would have found this book the least bit funny; downright blasphemous, more like.)

I have enjoyed The Babylon Bee (a Christian "news" site much like The Onion) for some time, and one of my favorite "stories" from years past was the shocking scandal that erupted in a certain church after the worship team sang "Oceans" in under ten minutes.

My own church does not have a parking lot, but I have visited churches in other cities where the orange vest patrol is out in full force. In addition, my church only holds a potluck about once a year, but the church I grew up in had them much more often, and the some of us were traumatized for life by the inevitable green Jell-o mold that had (gasp) vegetables in it. We never did figure out exactly which church lady committed that particular unforgivable sin. And don't even get me started on the time the pastor wore a colored dress shirt instead of the customary, Biblically-required white.... Ah, the memories this book brings back....

This book reminded me of a decades-old somewhat gentler (but still funny) work called "Growing Up Born Again," which brought back to memory what it was like to grow up in a non-denominational church in the 50s and 60s.

If you are familiar with current church culture and have a well-developed sense of humor, you will probably enjoy this book. If not... let the buyer beware. You may be terribly offended by it.

For the purists, the last chapter does share the Gospel, albeit in the same satirical manner as the earlier chapters. But rest assured it's there.

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Make way for some of the best religious satire since the prophet Elijah advised the prophets of Baal that they needed to yell louder because their god might be asleep or in the loo (1 Kings 18:27). <i>The Babylon Bee</i> is a hilarious satire site on the order of <i>The Onion</i> but with an Evangelical Christian slant.

This, <i>The Bee’s</i> first book, absolutely skewers legalistic, self-centered, preference-driven, argumentative, politics-obsessed Christianity. Who needs all that grace and fruit of the Spirit stuff when a little virtue signalling and putting others in their place will have everyone around you noticing how super spiritual you are?

Like any well-written satire, How to Be a Perfect Christian nicely blends funny, sad, and convicting. Depending on your taste, it might feel like it goes on a little too long or occasionally strays into “too mean” territory. However, I appreciate how it managed to hit on most of the common pitfalls to which Evangelical Christians are prone and cleverly wrapped up with a heartwarming summary of the grace and love that is at the heart of a true relationship with God. I highly recommend this book and expect it to make my top 10 list at the end of the year.

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In true-to-form satyrical fashion, the folks at Babylon Bee have written a book that will have you laughing and cringing (in a good way) at the same time! While the book, in my opinion, gets close to belaboring a point, I often found myself chuckling at the silliness of the extremes.

As with all satire, there is a serious point to be taken. Amidst all the laughs, the authors are pointing out how exhausting the path to being a perfect Christian can be as opposed to the true hope found in the gospel.

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I’ve been a fan of the Babylon Bee since its inception. It is satire at its best, addressing the worst of contemporary “Christianity” with wit and enough sarcasm that hopefully will stir the conscience of many so-called Christians to examine their faith. This book is almost as good as the blog, but with one major difference - the book seems more real, i.e., the issues it addresses are not too far from what is really happening in Christian churches nowadays.

Though it is very unlikely that from the blog, “John MacArthur Soars Out Of Lakewood Church Rafters To Elbow Drop Joel Osteen,” it is very likely to encounter a church parodied as, from the book, “An important mark of a healthy church is that it does not have a statement of faith. If there is a list of dogmatic beliefs anywhere on the website, no matter how well it’s hidden, run. Flee. Stay very far away. At most, allow for the church to have a vague page titled “Our Journey” or “The God Story” that lays out a very fluid set of general teachings in poetic cadence.”

How to Be a Perfect Christian leaves you laughing out loud for the author’s cleverness and humor, but also weeping bitterly because it is spot on in its representation of the sad state of the church.

One reason I give it only 3-stars is because even though I’m a fan of their short articles, the long-form book is just not my cup of tea. It took me awhile to read the book because I could only take a morsel of it at a time. Otherwise, it would end up tedious and boring. Thanks to the publisher and #netgalley for the advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

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This is a hilariously accurate book for anyone who is trying to be a "perfect" Christian. Honestly, many churches in America would be probably read this book and say, "That sounds like a great idea. We should try that." without realizing that the book is satire. If you like the Babylon Bee, then you will love this book.

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If you are at all familiar with the Babylon Bee website and their satirical potshots at the church and church culture then you'll know what you're getting. Generally good fun, plenty of laugh out loud moments and holds a mirror so the Christian community can see itself as it sometimes is. It seems to me to basically take similar posts to the shorter comic threads from their website and glues them all together to make a book out of it. Nothing wrong with that as such, it's what they're so good at. It mostly works although there are times when they seem to be trying a bit too hard to be funny but that's no different to tons of comedians you watch on tv. I am in the UK and How to Be a Perfect Christian is largely aimed at American Christianity (or seems that way to me) but much of it applies to the UK as well. Funny, satirical and doesn't take itself too seriously so we shouldn't either. It'd make a good gift for someone so long as they have a sense of humour! Just in case anyone is wondering it isn't an anti-Christian book, if anything it's pro Christian enough to be highlighting the absurdity when church becomes world centred rather than God centred. I'm trying to write a Christian comedy book myself and found myself on the BB's wavelength so not sure if I should be worried or pleased?!? Thanks to NetGalley and WaterBrook & Multnomah for an ebook copy for review purposes.

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If you like satire, especially satire pointed at yourself, you’ll love this book.

How to Be a Perfect Christian obviously does NOT tell us how to be a perfect Christian. Instead, it gives us lots of funny examples of ways we trick ourselves into thinking we can become perfect Christians.

For example, in Chapter 2, “Worshipping Like a Pro,” you learn about church swag. (If you’ve ever had a church bulletin riddled with grammatical errors, you’ll appreciate this.)

“Researchers have discovered that every church bulletin in existence contains no less than three hundred spelling or grammar errors. If you find one with less than that, hang on to it—it’s gonna be worth some money someday.”

In the next chapter, “Doing Life Together,” you find a few simple tricks to help you pray in public with your small group.

* Use the phrase “Father God” like it’s going out of style.
* Say “just” every other word. . . . Ninety percent of any good prayer is comprised of the three words “just,” “Father,” and “God.”
* Take on a Puritan persona throughout your prayer.
* Pray for almost three hours so everyone sees how holy you are.
* Correct other people’s prayers.
* Pray two or three times just to keep the group on their toes.
* Use big, bibley words, even if you don’t understand them.

We internet Christians aren’t left out. Chapter 5, “Looking Really Spiritual Online,” has these pointers.

“So to begin to revitalize your prayer life, you need to learn the biblical practice of posting pictures of yourself during your quiet times with Jesus to every social media channel available.”

To get a really spiritual picture of your open Bible, they suggest you follow the acronym CHAFF.

C—COFFEE
“Make sure you get a cup of tasty joe in your picture. Taking the picture while at a coffee shop even shows that you don’t care if the world knows you’re a Jesus freak. Bonus points, baby!”

H—HASHTAGS
“Hashtag that sucker for maximum reach. We recommend hashtags like #blessed, #amen, #holy, #iambetterthanyou, and #lookeveryoneimreadingmyBible”

A—AUDIENCE
“Don’t forget that you’re doing this for an audience of one million.”

F—FILTER
“A plain-Jane picture of an open Bible never got anyone on the express lane to heaven. You need to use filters to make the image appear deep and spiritual. Apply an authentic vintage look, and you can be sure you’ll get a like from Jesus Himself.”

F—FAT
“As in the size of your Bible. Use a fat, thick, leather-bound study Bible. Make sure to get the gold-embossed title on the spine in the picture, so everyone knows you read your MacArthur Study Bible regularly.”

And so it goes.

This book might make you cringe. Sometimes we need that uncomfortable feeling.

But this book will also make you laugh. We need that, too.

“Now get to work! It’s not easy being perfect.”

My thanks to Net Galley for the review copy of this book.

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Where has this book been all my life?

If I could give it a thousand stars, I would. Forget the Bible, forget The Pilgrim's Progress...How To Be A Perfect Christian is THE best book. Ever. The spiritual truths I gained while reading it were unbelievable. It's a revolutionary book that will change souls around the world. I can't count how many times I cried while reading it because I was convicted by what it said about the Christian life and I realized I wasn't living up to my full potential as a child of God. How could I not see that everything is meant to be about me? This book blew my mind. I can't get over how insightful and amazing it was. Definitely the best book of 2018. Maybe of the whole decade.

(The above is satire, just like the book itself. How To Be A Perfect Christian is one of the funniest books I've read and everything you'd expect from the creators of The Babylon Bee. Highly recommended!)

I received a free copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for my honest review.

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Sarcastic and insightful, I loved this book. The book was a fast read, well written and pretty darn funny.
I liked the holiness trackers throughout the book and the Christian bumper sticker suggestions. The book was written sarcastically and you could tell when the authors were being for real and when they weren't which is great for me since I don't pick up on sarcasm easily. All in all, I really enjoyed this book, it was entertaining, funny, and had a really great ending message.
Rating: 5 stars!
FTC DISCLAIMER: I received this book in exchange for an honest review

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Witty, humorous, and refreshing - How to Be a Perfect Christian takes the satire we know and love from the Babylon Bee and expands on it in this hilarious book. While it is comedic, it also serves as a mirror for a Christian to look inward and realize that they might have concepts of what Christianity is that are flawed and unhelpful. Definitely a recommended read.

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I don't identify as a Christian and thus am probably not the ideal audience for this book, but I was interested in it because I love The Onion and was interested in how that type of humor might apply to spirituality. This book did not disappoint. I laughed out loud at points and also learned a few things. Thanks for the read!

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It is great to finally read a book that addresses the issues of church culture with such great flare of satire. I spent many hours laughing at its material.. I highly recommend this book for ministers. It is a good escape from the demands of ministry. The only fault I have with the book is that too often there are people who actually act like the personas portrayed in the book. I would laugh at the storyline only to realize that the descriptions reminded me of different people I have interacted with in my 15 yrs. of ministry. Sad, but true.
Regardless of this truth, this book is a great escape from the more seriousness of theological and church life. materials available,
Read and learn how to be a perfect Christian.

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I enjoyed parts of this book immensely; the remaining portions just seemed mean. The snark and satire is certainly on point for much of it but it waffled between seeming like a family member had written parts with head-shaking smirks and love, and seeming like an internet troll of the opposite political party wrote the rest.. Overall I think the Bee will keep a wider readership if it works on pushing Christians to greater things by challenging the status quo using humor rather than beating Christians over the head with the verbal bat of sarcasm. How to Be a Perfect Christian is a valiant first effort, though.

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Many of you have probably seen posts from The Babylon Bee, a satire "news" site similar to The Onion (spoiler alert if you didn't know they were satire too), but from a Christian perspective. It fills the hole that Stuff Christians Like left in me when Jon Acuff stopped posting there. The Bee recently published a book called How to Be a Perfect Christian: Your Comprehensive Guide to Flawless Spiritual Living. It's a step-by-step guide of how to be the best Christian possible by making sure you maintain a me-centered attitude in regards to spirituality. Remember...satire.

This book definitely had some funny parts, and I found myself laughing out loud on more than one occasion. And if you're willing, the satire will even challenge you on what you think Christianity is all about. The Western culture tries to make everything about the individual, and unfortunately, Christians are also affected. From the prominence of impersonal megachurches to the need to post every spiritual act on social media, Christianity in America is often not to far from the caricature presented in the book. My sarcastic self loves the use of satire to point out the ridiculous things we see in our culture and also cringes when I see some of those things in myself.

Unfortunately, while satire can open our eyes to the hypocrisy of the world around us, it doesn't do a lot to really direct us towards doing better. The last chapter stated the gospel, but it needed to do more towards showing a better way. A lot of people can't appreciate sarcasm, especially when it's directed their way, but for those who can, I would definitely pick up this book.

Some people may read this book or something else by The Babylon Bee and think the church is too broken. I've seen people comment on their articles with things like, "this is why I don't go to church anymore." That's the wrong response. Because the church is filled with sinners, it's inherently imperfect. Instead of shaking our finger at the problems with the church, we should be working to fix it from the inside with the help of the Holy Spirit. I wrote a post on the Church a while back so if you'd like to know more check it out.


I received a free copy of this book from WaterBrook & Multnomah and NetGalley in exchange for my honest review.

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