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The Right Amount of Panic

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Member Reviews

I’ve never thought that much about the amount of time and energy I’ve spent trying to keep myself safe, and that lies at the heart of this book. As women, we grow up internalising the messages we are given about how to be a ‘good girl’, what it means to be a girl and what our place is in the world. Along the way, we make adjustments to how we look, behave and take up space.

We make sure our friends text us when they get home so we know they’re safe. We don’t walk alone on certain streets at night. We are hyperaware of who might be following us. We get our keys out early and hold them as though they are weapons. We do these and so many other things that this book calls ‘safety work’ to try to prevent sexual violence and we’ve done it for so long that we don’t even really think about it anymore.

“Safety work refers to the range of modifications, adaptations, decisions that women take often habitually in order to maintain a sense of safety in public spaces.”

We know we’re in a Catch-22: if we are successful in our safety work and nothing happens then we’re seen to be overreacting and paranoid but if we are victimised then we’re blamed for not doing enough to protect ourselves. It seems there’s no right amount of panic, hence the title of this book.

“We are scared because we’ve been made responsible for preventing rape at the same time as being told it’s inevitable.”

The author examines the choices and changes we make to “maintain a sense of safety in public space”, categorised as actions relating to moving, clothing and being. As well as drawing on previous research, they conducted their own study.

Fifty women in the United Kingdom of different ages and backgrounds participated, speaking to the author about their experiences of men in public. They then recorded what they experienced from unknown men over a two week to two month period before meeting with the author again to reflect on the “work of being a woman in public”. Much of the book consists of quotes from these interviews.

I found this book interesting, albeit quite repetitive. Some potential solutions are offered.

Although the author addresses stereotypes related to gender, race, class, age and disability, I noted that the majority of the women included in her study were white (43), heterosexual (37) women.

Content warnings include domestic violence, sexual assault and sexual harassment.

Thank you so much to NetGalley and Policy Press for the opportunity to read this book. I’m rounding up from 3.5 stars.

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This is a very heavy book and requires trigger warnings. But I am studying women’s rights so enjoyed this take on rape culture and sexual assault and the sexiest need for us to undertake things or rituals to keep us safe. This book highlights what so many need to know about what women do to survive.

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While I will appreciate better formating so that I can differentiate the author's voice from the voices of the interviewed, I love this book.
I appreciate the many stories shared because they are the same fear that I have. I felt seen and held while reading this book.

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Note to publisher: I am better able to feature books I'm provided through NetGalley if they have actual covers, even if they're ARCS. Such covers make for actual pictures for Instagram, which means inclusion in #bookstagram, which can elevate the number of impressions on a post exponentially, and help my blog posts be more visual and SEO-friendly. They also improve eyes on social posts on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. The ARC I got didn't have a cover.

Nor did it display the many long quotes it contained any differently than the running text. This made it difficult to distinguish what was being said by the author and what was being said by the many women she cited. Since the book relies so heavily on those long quotes, it would have been more helpful to have them set apart better. Maybe they are in the final copy; I don't know.

The Right of Amount of Panic sounds interesting as a title for a book doesn’t it, especially during this Covid-19 pandemic? I definitely found it intriguing, although it didn’t have anything to do with the right amount of panic for this outbreak. We could use some kind of manual on that, couldn’t we? Instead, this book explores and defines “panic” as it applies to women and their efforts to prevent being harassed or harmed by men. No matter your gender or your feelings about the feminist movement, this book is an an interesting and useful read.

What’s The Right Amount of Panic About?
Really, if you have any desire to understand problems in society in general or what it’s like to be a woman in this day and age specifically, at least in relation to the social dynamics between men and women, this book is worth a read, at least so that you can be more informed. Ninety-percent of this book is descriptions by various woman of the “safety work” they and others do to prevent any kind of threat of sexual harassment or violence, things like learning self-defense, holding your keys a certain way, or carrying mace when you travel by yourself. These are things I’m already pretty familiar with, so I skipped over a lot of them.

This book isn’t an exploration of the glass ceiling that many women encounter at work or of any of the other myriad issues unique to us. It’s not a rallying cry against men, although there are some feminist undertones. It is a tool for understanding and maybe even for dialogue.

I, for example, think author F. Vera-Gray makes an interesting point: that there’s something wrong with the fact that women have done so much “safety work” that they take for granted that it needs to be done. She doesn’t tell women to stop doing safety work, nor does she accuse all men of being domineering. I’m glad she didn’t lambaste all men by virtue of their gender because that would have been too generalizing to be helpful or constructive.

She does, however, tell women to be more mindful of the safety work that they and others do. That, if anything, is the main purpose of The Right Amount of Panic: to increase women’s awareness of each other’s situations because, as she says, “the only way to adjust this paradigm is collectively.” Although I feel that point would have been made in much fewer words–it became repetitive after a while–it still needs to be said.


Personally, though, I found this book interesting not only because of the experiences other women have had, but also because it helped me gain a perspective on something I hadn’t realized I was missing. I extrapolated Vera-Gray’s conclusions about why women do what they do to other social issues, like race.

It made me wonder, for instance, if most African Americans don’t speak up about their collective mistreatment by white people because they–like women avoiding sexual predators or bullies–have just done so much of the “safety work” of keeping their heads low that they too just think of it as part of their lives. It’s an unpleasant and unfair one, to be sure, but a here-to-stay part nonetheless. At least, I guess that’s what they might think. They’d rather continue to do the safety work they’ve always done than try to fight the bigger fights–not only of changing any still-prejudiced minds but also of convincing other African Americans to actively join them in the effort. Or maybe they haven’t experienced that mistreatment as much as others? I don’t know.

Who Would Like The Right Amount of Panic?
Both gender and race issues are complicated and nuanced ones, for sure, but you’ll like this book if you like nonfiction books with lots of real-world situations and a good amount of research. And ones that make you think.

Book Deal for The Right Amount of Panic
The lowest price I could find on this book was $19.99 on BarnesandNoble.com.

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This is a condensed version of a large research study, intended for a wider audience than the in depth research. It won't come as any shock to most women who experience life through a lens of 'just surviving' but it should be able to open eyes and minds to how society works and how structures actively work against women in many instances. A key read for anyone interested in gender politics, feminism or, for what it's worth, 'men's rights'.

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My motivation in reading this book lies in two aspects: I'm a woman and I do not like the way rape/domestic violence/gender violence and in general, violence against women is handled in my country. In reading this, I could not help but note that the author did point out studies/research from diverse sources on women, safety and violence. This book is what I call a conversation starter because it questions how we perceive and handle matters relating to violence against women and it's timely.
Thanks Netgalley for the eARC.

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A well researched book. Has a lot of relevance in today’s climate. Offers opinions and solutions to the issues being discussed.

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This is a very academically focused volume, reading more like a thesis that someone put together, rather than a full book on its own. It gathers together accurate information and statistics, as well as cutting edge personal thoughts and insights by Vera-Gray's interviews with various women around the UK. Whilst it was incredibly interesting to read, I don't think it is one that will appeal to many people, due to the technical language and the structure of the book. It does feel very much like reading a college essay of some kind, and can be a little taxing at times. Otherwise, a very important and well-researched book.

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I'm really glad that this book exists. I felt personally that it didn't start strong, but it only got better and more important as I continued reading. It handles such heavy topics, and it tackles head on all the work that women must do just for the feeling of safety. I wish this were required reading for all young people.

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A thoughtful discussion of a relevant topic. This book examines rape culture and does so in an engaging, meaningful way. Recommended!

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Excellent excellent, Not only do women need to read this book, men should. The ongoing almost unconscious bias against women is so pervasive, as women we often simply accept some of the things without even thinking: I won't walk over there, I won't wear that top.

It is so important to know and be aware, however bad it may be out there now. Hopefully this will be required reading for as many kids as possible.
Developing thoughtful attitudes of respect of oneself and others will make the biggest difference.

Thanks for writing it.

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This book should be read by all women, as it states that women are not to blame for the harassment they receive in the world and highlights advice given to women to avoid being harassed or assaulted. This book is definitely empowering and hopefully puts and end to blaming the victim!

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