Cover Image: How to Date Men When You Hate Men

How to Date Men When You Hate Men

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Member Reviews

I thought it was going to be more about how to navigate a power imbalance when dating within a patriarchy, and it really was just about her love life.

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I honestly couldn't make it through this book. While the author had many funny quips, the writing felt very self involved and as a reader I couldn't connect.

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Thanks for the opportunity to read and review How to Date Men When You Hate Men. I've struggled to get into it so far, so I won't be reviewing at this time. If I do get to it in the future, I will review at that time.

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I really enjoyed this book. Robertson writes about a lot of things that I've experience as a woman dating men, so it was affirming (I won't say relatable) to hear someone else say it, in funnier, more entertaining words that I probably would. I wouldn't really say that this is a 'How To' book, despite the title, but more a discussion of her experiences dating men in a patriarchal society.

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Unfortunately, I didn't finish reading How to Date Men When You Hate Men by Blythe Robertson because I found the insights lacking and predictable.

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The title How to Date Men When You Hate Men might mislead the passive observer to believe this is a how-to book or a self-help book. It is not. The book is about the modern-day dating world and the author's experiences. It speaks on the unrealistic expectations out there for women these days, struggling being real and honest but appearing "perfect". The book explores on the roller coaster ride of dating with author anecdotes that remind you that you are not the only one thats been through it.
Blythe Roberson paints a humorous picture of the dating world as she sees it. I especially related to the dichotomy that exists within us of wanting to be strong independant feminists that are true to themselves and who they are, but also desire to be admired and attractive to our love interested, no matter how ill advised and misguided they may be.

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Loved, loved, loved, loved. I posted about this one on Instagram when I started reading it (way back when, I completely forgot about writing a review) and got lots of texts from friends asking about this one. The title is obviously an attention-grabber and I'm glad! It draws in a reader that might not otherwise pick up such a book. Witty, relatable and a breath of fresh air, I loved this book.

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Apparently I did not meet the target audience for this book. It’s funny and snarky blah blah, but not for someone nearing 40. Thanks for letting me read it anyhow.

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I loved the concept behind this book, and I do think that it is very, very relevent for women who date men to examine the patriarchal structure of society in their romantic decisions, and to be able to incorporate their feminist idealogies in their dating lives -- and importantly, find partners who are supportive of that and recognize their own privilege therein. For the most part this book was a funny take on the idea, but I think the title should have been "How I Date Men When I Hate Men" because it was honestly very, VERY personal to Blythe's experience and did not really offer much up to women who maybe didn't agree with a lot of her experiences or thoughts on certain aspects of dating, society or pop culture.

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Good read & helpful to understand how the millennials are standing up against the patriarchy, but still getting theirs! The book has funny parts, but the points it makes about how men have always held women down & what we should do to fight against that while still enjoying company with the "enemy." It will be interesting to see what this 27 year old thinks about this same topic in 10-15 years. If you want insight into the new wave of feminism, this is a good read.

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"Getting to experience romantic love is definitely a DOPE-as-hell part of exiting, but it's by no means a necessary prerequisite to being a full tree." one of my favorite titles ever! when I was reading this I told a female friend about it thinking she might be interested and her response was "but I don't hate men" and I just silently rolled my eyes and made a mental note about feminism or assuming that a new friend is also a feminist or a woke feminist (or something like that). This is an astute essay collection. Although we're different generations, I could relate to Roberson's experiences. I'm also 49 and haven't had a date in over a year and have never been married. I appreciate her candor and sense of humor. I read it on my kindle and highlighted lots of passages and thought i'd linked my kindle to Goodreads but I'm not surprised that it seems not to be as everything's a mess.

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I was really looking forward to reading How to Date Men When You Hate Men. Except that the book ended up being not at all what I was expecting and it ended up taking me forever to actually finish it. As someone who is using dating apps and is 'over it' and definitely in a state of 'hating' men... I thought I would be able to relate more to the book and was looking to laugh a little bit more with someone who is dealing with the same crap that I am. Except it doesn't seem like the author is dealing with the same crap at all (yet all my friends using the apps seem to be) and she is actually going out with guys but then kind of seems to write off that it isn't a date. *shrugs* The plus was in the end she didn't reveal that she had found a guy that she was dating, that would have just been a stab in the heart if it was how it ended. There were a few things that hit home and made me laugh but for the most part I felt like this book missed the mark.

I received a free e-copy of this book in order to write this review. I was not otherwise compensated. This book was released January 8, 2019 from Flatiron Books.

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I wasn't even done with the introduction before I started thinking, "Where has this book been all of my life!" 2019 has just started, and already I know this will be one of my favorite books of the year. Blythe keeps it real.

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How To Date Men When You Hate Men is very entertaining. This is not a dating how to, but more observations on relationships. The story just rolled along, pulling me in with the author’s very dry humor which I thoroughly enjoyed.

“This makes it seem like I suck at introductions, which I emphatically DO NOT! I am very proud of being, like, okay at introductions, and I plan to slowly improve over the next twenty to seven hundred years.”

I do think that as an older person I am not quite the target audience for this book. The stories were so sprinkled with pop culture references that felt like they were sailing over my head. I found myself having to stop to highlight and google so many things. It kind of made me feel OLD!!

“There is quite a difference though, between considering something Not a Date when the other person frantically doesn’t want to date you versus when they maybe do. When they do, it feels much worse! When I suspect that someone maybe does want to be boyfriends, letting them make me food and me touching their knee in public feels like leading them on. I worry that I’m draining them of time and care and not offering the security of a label in return, like a succubus but for vegan food and cuddles.”

All and all, I was entertained and loved the author’s snarky voice. I will definitely be recommending this to my younger friends!
-4 Stars-

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One Sentence Synopsis: Comedy meets philosophy in feminist book for the woman trying to date but finding it hella difficult because the patriarchy sucks ass.

Why You Should Be Reading: Roberson’s “How to Date Men When You Hate Men” holds your hand while assuring you that, “Yes, we like men but they are a pain in the ass.” And like “Feminasty” by Erin Gibson, which is listed down below, you end up laughing and getting some perspective on what we go through day in and day out while trying to understand the male mystique.

This book also throws shade at Tom Hanks in “You’ve Got Mail” as we all should. He’s the true villain of that movie and I’m not accepting anything else from that tragedy that befell Meg Ryan’s character when she “fell in love” with Hanks character.

Be gone, demon spawn of misogyny, the patriarchy, and movie studios who think Tom Hanks is romantic comedy bae material.

Genres: Feminism, Humor, Essays

Learn more about the author HERE.

Buy the book HERE.

Add How to Date Men When You Hate Men to your Goodreads HERE.

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This is one of those books that, because I am not single and dating, my partner had to endure me reading paragraphs that I found particularly funny out loud. I was engaged and amused by Roberson's insight throughout.

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Very funny author. This book explores dating as a millennial who is well aware that we are living in a patriarchal society. The main drawback to the book is that it is very author-centric. This is made up for by her authentic voice and all around hilarious writing. I wouldn't say I learned much, and certainly the title of the book was never answered, but I did have a great time reading it.

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This is a relatable and timely book. Roberson writes about things that many modern women feel, but are not used to talking out loud about. I personally related to it, and would recommend it to anyone who enjoys modern social commentary or books with a feminist bent.

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Written by a woman who, by her own admission, has never had a long-term relationship, this book attempts to analyze dating and relationships in the digital age. I found it tedious and redundant, as the author explores stages of relationship and ponders why or why not they succeed or fail at each stage, with little new insight. I understand her frustration at being unable to decipher the meanings of crushes vs. flirtation, picking up on signals we give each other, and communication snafus while trying to get know another person. Yet I didn't feel this book covered new territory or inspired me to think upon hypotheses she presented.

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