An incredibly lovely and cathartic novel from Maia Kobabe. The read was very intimate, and was grateful to hear from eir experience. It's a freshly done memoir!

I got an ARC of this book.

In an attempt to learn as much as I can about gender (and read as many graphic novels as I can), I found this memoir. I am a fan of graphic novel memoirs, partially due to one of the professors mentioned in this book. That little shout out was wonderful to me and if I hadn't already read many of her works, I would have looked her up. 

Kobabe tells the story of growing up gender queer and asexual. There isn't a bashing over the head with "this is what gender queer is" or "this is what asexuality is", instead there is just this really honest story of figuring things out and what those words mean to eir. This is wonderful. This is a memoir, not a textbook. I cared more about what these words meant for Kobabe than what the techincal definition was. Both of the main identity terms are so broad that there is no real way to understand them, until you heard what they mean to that person. 

I am both trans and ace, so this story really hit close to home with some of the feelings. The feelings around dating and this intense anxiety of coming out to strangers were so easy to relate to. The idea that coming out is this political and powerful support act for others vs personal comfort with being in the spotlight was addressed so well. If this book were solely Kababe's interactions with the children in the class e teaches I would still have given it five stars. Those few pages are so powerful and so necessary for people to see, not just other trans/non-binary/gender queer/so many other labels that are just as important, but cis gender people as well. There is this view that if trans people don't come out immediately, then the trans person has been lying. There is this pressure to be out and put out all of this emotional energy for the sake of the cis person. I loved these pages more than I ever expected to love any pages in a graphic novel. 

This book is just so powerful. There is not a single wasted panel or story. Every single detail is important and wonderful. I am just so thankful that Kobabe created this and was willing to share it with the world. The emotional energy and strength it took is just astounding. 

I can go on forever about this book. The art is beautiful. The story is wonderful and necessary. The emotions are raw and painful. I am here for all of it.

Great look to into what it means to be gender queer. Loved the illustrations. Great for all readers and easy to read.

I learned the term asexual sometime in 2015 and more recently, gender queer. It wasn’t earth shattering or life-changing. It was more like something clicking into place with the knowledge that that disinterested state you have known all this time has a name. If this graphic novel was released much earlier, that light bulb moment would have come sooner too.

In my country, the term gender queer is relatively unknown. If you are not hetero, it’s either you are a gay or lesbian. People confuse gay with trans, even the gay guys themselves almost always have the idea that being gay means becoming or acting like a woman. Those who prefer to act masculine are referred to with derision as ‘pretending to be a man’ or ‘not a real man’. Lesbians were also expected to be butch and lipstick lesbians are not common. Much of my experience with gender queers are those born biologically male and would be automatically tagged as gay. Maia Kobabe would be tagged as lesbian and it would take a very lengthy explanation to make people understand. There are no guarantees they will.

This memoir will help open minds. It explores gender identity and self. It also talks about love and family and how having a sibling who just gets you could make all the difference in the world. It chronicles the difficulties and horrors a gender queer person goes through. It is raw and very honest, sometimes painfully so but always with a touch of humor and optimism. In itself, it is a highly enjoyable graphic novel with interesting illustrations and has an ending that leaves an opening for a sequel just in case.

I highly recommend this to everybody.

P.S.

I received a copy of Gender Queer: A Memoir from Lion Forge via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

Rating:
4.5 Stars – perfection is only half a step away

Soundtrack: Anyhow, Anyhow, Anywhere
Artist: David Bowie
Album: Pin Ups

This comic was educational and interesting. Maia take us through er history of not wanting to be a boy, and not wanting to be a girl. Of just wanting to be er self and figure out who that really is. The author holds back nothing. We get to see periods, wishing for a penis (and what that specific arousal is called), and even horrified trips to the doctors. I found once I started this story I didn’t want to put it down. I wish there was a bit more at the end, but I also understand that Maia has to live more life in order for us to get more of her evolution of self. I think this book would be great not only for those who have not figured out their identity yet, but for those of us that have, as it gives the reader a glimpse into another life, and a way to start learning proper vocabulary and understanding.
#LitsyAtoZ #G

This is the first graphic novel memoir that I've read and it's beautiful. A brilliant and raw exploration of identity and self. It's straightforward, honest and wonderful. This is a definite recommend!

this book was so emotional and personal. it definitely wasnt what i was expecting, though i dont know what it was that i was expecting from this book. this follows the author's journey through life. it shows what e went through as a child all the way through eir adulthood trying to figure out who e really is. honestly, amazing.

This was an autobiographical comic following the author's long, and evidently ongoing, trek into gender identity. At one point, the author choses to use what are referred to as 'Spivak' pronouns (E, Em, Eir) after Michael Spivak, for reasons which are never made clear. These particular ones were first used in 1975 by Christine Elverson, so I didn't get why they weren't referred to as 'Elverson pronouns', but there it is.

For me, one big problem with these sort of options is that there is maybe half-dozen or more sets of them, all unagreed upon. For me, the worst problem with them is that they're superfluous when we already have they, them, and their which are all-inclusive gender-neutral words. Personally, I find this to be a fatuous and pointless attempt to create a new word group set when a perfectly functional one already exists. I'm for simplicity and clarity, for ease and comfort, so I will use existing, established pronouns in this review.

The journey they undertook in trying to feel comfortable with themselves is a remarkable and moving one, told here unvarnished and raw as it must have felt in making that journey. To feel constantly uncomfortable with your body in a world which has a two-million-year tradition of humans supposedly (if often delusionally) being definitely either male or female has to be traumatizing, and we get the whole feeling of that conveyed in this book. If it makes you feel uncomfortable and brings you along on this journey, then author is doing a fine job. It worked for me.

A person who starts out biologically female, and if the zygote is destined to be a male, certain things need to kick in, and often they do, but quite often they do not, or they kick in part way, and this is how we get a sliding scale, all too often holding people hostage, who feel somewhere adrift, but not exactly sure where.

In this case the author ended-up feeling extremely uncomfortable with breasts, and a vagina that bleeds periodically(!), but not feeling like a male either (even while harboring fantasies about male physiology), they became someone who is interested in friendship and companionship but not in marriage, children, or even sex. "What am I?" is a question they asked themselves frequently - as frequently, probably, as "Where am I going and what will I find when I get there?" which is a scary question for anyone in this position.

The blurb says this book is "a useful and touching guide on gender identity" but I disagree. I think it's more of a guide in lack of identity, and how to cope with that, how to work with it, how to address it and pursue your own path even while surrounded by uncertainty.

This was a long journey, and I traveled every step of the way, and I think this book is an amazing and informative volume, very personal, but universal, very uncomfortable, but comforting, readable, amusing, disturbing and unnerving. I think everyone needs to read this and try to understand it, especially in the political climate we've made for ourselves in the USA right now. I commend this as a worthy read and salute the author and wish them an easier journey in the coming years than it has been at times over the last few.

This was so well done, and I could relate to it so much as a non-binary identifying human. I love the style of Maia's art, and the story was beautiful and so relatable. I look forward to reading more.

This is a great, touching and informative memoir about being gender queer. It's an honest book and I wish it existed more of them.

What a wonderful, strong and moving comic. I was not only touched by the strength and honesty in it but by the truthfulness that you can feel through it. It is great to read the struggle and conflict that Maia has gone through and knowing e is displaying emself in a way that many haven't before. This Graphic Memoir delves deep and is uncomfortable to read at times as Maia's pain radiates through the page.

The art is just as well done as the writing, portraying graphic scenes as menstrual blood or strap on sex with such skill that makes them approachable and easier to read.

My only complaint is a few abrupt transitions and the final abrupt ending which had me double checking that my digital copy was accurate.

I cannot wait to have a physical copy of this book on my shelves and keep an eye out for what e does next!

I really enjoyed this. I think e really articulates the challenges of being gender queer in a way that will resonate with many readers and educate many more. I hope E writes more memoir books. Both the story and the artwork were awesome. It is also great to have a narrative out there for the person who identifies as non-binary or gender queer.
I was given a free copy from NetGalley in return for an unbiased review.

Ok, I love, love, LOVE this graphic novel memoir!
It is so rare to see someone being so candid about their struggles with gender identity and the extreme fear and dysphoria that comes with it. I think these types of tales NEED to be out in the world, not just for the young people who are going through similar things (but goodness knows they need it so badly) but also for the general cic-het establishment to understand what gender non-binary or gender non-conforming people go through. Kidos to Maia Kobabe for being so brave and telling eir story (<--- NO THAT WAS NOT A TYPO, Maia prefers Spivak pronouns!). It will help so many people!

I’ve said before that the gender binary is toxic.

So it’s wonderful to meet someone who identifies as non-binary. I appreciate Maia and the bravery e has to share this part of eir life.

I identify as male. And I’m cis. But I hate, hate, hate the gender binary. I hate the way it forces us into roles we don’t want. I hate that it forces us into relationships we don’t need.

Thank you, Maia for sharing a little bit of yourself and helping us understand who you are.

Thank you for showing us there are other ways to think than our culture shows us.

I don’t know why we are so focused in putting people into such tiny boxes.

<i>Thanks to NetGalley, Diamond Book Distributors, and Lion Forge for a copy in return for an honest review.</i>

Top tier on every level. Maia does wonders of comics and story craft in this clear and raw exploration of eir gender. Highest of recommends!

Maia Kobabe's memoir graphic novel is a work of art and would be invaluable on any bookshelf. Kobabe's progress through eir childhood feels so real and relatable. E gives a full depiction of growing up feeling non-binary in a gendered world, and the process of discovering not only eir gender, but eir sexuality (trying to figure out of if e was bisexual, asexual, amongst other labels.) Really palpable and resonant throughout was how deeply Kobabe just wanted the relief of pressure from being one gender or another, and the relief of finally being seen as/addressed by eir proper pronouns (which I hope I'm not bungling too much in my review, having only learned of Spivak pronouns from this book). "Gender Queer: A Memoir" feels like it could become as seminal as Bechdel's "Fun Home", just as mind opening, just as a necessary.
Thanks NetGalley for providing an eARC in exchange for an honest review.

This ARC was provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This is the book I could've used in high school. Honest, educational, and touching. E is the protagonist we all need, especially students growing up and discovering their gender identity and sexuality. E is open about all of the aspects of discovering eirself. This type of honesty is what makes this book so important.
The art is beautiful and well done. This was such a touching, important, yet easy read. I would recommend this to high school students who are struggling to find themselves, and to the general public to gain a greater understanding of how to approach the topic of pronouns.

The ARC of this book was provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

A beautiful, honest graphic novel. Having stories like these, which come from a place of pure raw experience, are so important to those struggling or looking for direction. I will definitely make sure I have a copy of this on my shelf.

This is an excellent story. I never really understood what it meant to be 'gender queer' but this memoir explores this, and tells the story of a person who finds that e is gender queer and what it means for em.

It is a journey which starts when e is young and then develops as e becomes a teenager and then an adult. As an adult e is able to embrace a non-binary life. E is both asexual and non-binary but has had to discover this.

This book is educational but it is more than that because it is a story of self-identity and self-understanding. Our world is intolerant of difference and it is used to divide and exclude people instead of embracing and valuing one another. This story really encouraged me to embrace who I am (even though I am not non-binary) and not to allow any one to eclipse who I am and what I have to offer.

The author has shown how e has managed to do this by writing this graphic novel. It is beautifully told and the artwork is lovely. The drawings are quite simple but convey a powerful memoir and I am so glad I read it. I think this is a book that will help many others understand who ey are and to have the courage to live eir truth.

An excellent graphic novel and going on my list of exquisite reads of 2019!

Copy provided via Netgalley in exchange for an unbiased review.

I was drawn to this one for many reasons. But I am glad I read this one. IT was thought-provoking. Beautiful and relatable. This is a memoir I will own. It is well written and I can see where this would help others in their own journey.