As a grandparent, I wish there had been this commonsense book when I was a parent. It would have helped tremendously to know I was not alone in my dealings with losing my shit. In the 80’s no one talked openly about the grind that accompanied the joy of parenting.

This book has great tips and explanations on how to be a better parent. The book does not preach stifling behavior but instead being able to recognize what sets you off and circumventing that trigger. I thought there were good, tangible steps to becoming a calmer parent when dealing with your kids. Your kids will do what they do, it’s how you react to them that matters.

How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids was a refreshing read in the parenting book category. I often finish a parenting book feeling like other parents have it more together than me, and I am weighed down by a new set of things I have to do to be better, which only adds to the overwhelm.

Carla wrote a book that is incredibly relatable and for once I felt like someone understood and acknowledged the struggles that I experience with parenting in a way that offered realistic solutions. Some of the suggestions were new to me, and some were things that I have worked on in the past, but we all need reminders, and after reading this book, I feel like I have a stronger handle on *simple* solutions to help me be a better parent, and a better person.

I received a copy of the book via NetGalley to review.

Carla Naumburg is hilarious and down to earth. I first heard Carla on a podcast and I knew she was someone who understands that the struggle is real. As a SAHM/homeschooling parent to a 7 year old, 4 year old twins and a 2 year old...I needed this book. It is a quick read. Her use of acronyms makes it easy to remember the ideas she presents. She give practical advice that focuses on the parent and how to manage our triggers and big emotions so that we can be there for our children. I lose my Sh*t on the regular with my kids but this book has given me actionable steps to help me stop. Okay, so I may not stop losing my Sh*t with my kids but it definitely give me steps to lessen my Sh*t losing (not quite as often and not quite as explosive.) And it gives you permission to not feel guilty on those bad days when you still lose your Sh*t with your kids. This is definitely a book I would recommend and will share it with my friends.

If you don't like the use the word in the title that has the asterisk, you probably won't like this book. It is very much down to earth and quite funny.

Carla Naumburg wrote a practical, relatable, and compassionate book about an issue that all parents go through at least to some degree, but can still be hard to understand and discuss. She hit home with the uselessness of the "bad parent" label, because it closes the avenues for growth and change. Her compassionate approach extends to both parents and kids, and I think that's key. I have improved in my interactions with my kids since I started to try to be more understanding of the lack of control that comes with having a young, developing, brain. But, as a grown woman, it has been harder to be understanding of myself, and I think this book did a good job in encouraging the type of introspection. The book is very approachable and easy to get through. Some readers may be put off by the language how colloquial it is, but for me it worked, it gave the book some levity and it felt like a conversation instead of a dry self-help book. Like many books of this type, I think it's ideal format will be the audiobook. Also, I tend to think that advice books are limited in their potential impact, so it's important to have realistic expectations; this isn't going to replace therapy, or work like magic, by osmosis. But, for useful advice and a way to start reframing our thought, I great this book will fit the bill.

Thanks to NetGalley for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I interviewed the author for an article so I was interested to read her new book and I'm glad I did.

I loved the author's voice which felt like I was reading something written by a friend. Most self-help/psychology books lack this relatable tone. I found it especially helpful when she explained the science of getting upset which was probably the most difficult aspect of the book to understand.

In the beginning, she writes, "there is no such thing as a bad parent." And then goes onto to say that this notion is not helpful. She reframes this idea by saying, "let's talk about parents that are struggling, who don't yet have the right information, resources or support." I love this concept and think that, in general, people would be more willing to seek help if this idea was prevalent.

The examples throughout the books helped me to understand the concepts. I could relate to the example of a kid's soccer game and ways it can be triggering for parents. There were many other similar relatable examples.

I think one of the best aspects of this book is that even though it is geared towards parents, you could use the techniques for any situation to improve your anger management.

I received this book in exchange for my honest review. THank you NetGalley!

As a mom, I know that I find myself losing my patience WAY too often. I don't mean to.. but let's face it. kids are buttheads sometimes. Parenting is hard. This book made me feel better about myself, and it gave me some GREAT ideas on how to help myself and them.

Thank you!

As mom to two little girls, ages 3 and 4, I NEEDED this book. Unlike most parenting books it didn’t leave me feeling worse about myself and how I am failing as a mom.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who loses their $hit! This practical book had good tips/ reminders. I NEED to take care of myself too, so I'm hoping I will be putting more of this into practice in the coming weeks.


(Will review on amazon and Goodreads once book is released.)

Very interesting and enjoyable read. Parenting is such a hard but worthwhile role. Sometimes you can lose sight of important things in the day to day running of things. This was a good read and I learned a lot that I will be trying to put into practice

I read this book in a day, as it hits close to home with myself and my family. Tired of hippy-dippy bullshit, I liked the "practical" aspect from the subtitle, and I was not disappointed.

I don't lose my temper with my daughters often, but often enough that I know it is a problem. No one is listening when I'm yelling, just a scramble to shut up the yelling person. Then everything goes back to what started the yelling. Cycle repeat, for, what, a couple years now?

I received an ARC in exchange for honest review of this read. As you can probably imagine, there is profanity in this book - evident right from the title. However, if you can move past that, you'll find a read that speaks deeply to the parenting struggles of constantly being frustrated. The author unpacks the concept of having buttons pushed by our kids and how we can better respond and prevent those buttons from being so easily pushed. Much of the book is basic, but I really needed the reminders. I appreciated her sense of humour, personal stories and the way she made mental health concepts seem relatable and easily accessible. Great read!

Title: How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids
Author: Carla Naumburg
Format: protected PDF
Tissue warning: no
Narrative: 1st person, familiar
My reviewer rating: of 5
Published: August 20, 2019
Preorder link: not available at time of review

Thank you, Netgalley, for my digital copy of How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids in exchange for my honest-to-goodness review of this novel by Carla Naumburg.

So, I knew all along I'm not alone in the world of losing my sh*t. I knew I wasn't the only parent to go to bed and often re-think my parenting decisions that day and actually want to wake my kids back up and tell them I'm so sorry that I'm such a sh*tty mom. I know I'm not a sh*tty mom, but it's natural to feel that way when you are actually being a good parent. I do lost my sh*t more often than I should, though, which is why I wanted to read a book like this. I need some sort of self-help to hopefully understand why I lose it and better ways to control that outburst.

This book didn't help me there at all.

Ms. Naumberg wrote this book almost autobiographically, with a lot of personal experiences. That's not a bad thing! When we are looking for help, we want to see examples and experience and cause and effect. But for me, I also want to see more insight into how to fix these examples so that they never have to happen again. To avoid blowing my fuse completely. Ms. Naumberg suggests seeking advise elsewhere quite often. With this, I feel as another reviewer had mentioned, that this book could have been a blog post or advise column rather than a full-length self-help book.

This is the second instance of a self-help-type book that points out that most parents' reactions are due to how they were raised and what they witnessed in their own parents. I'm sorry, my parents NEVER blew up on me. Ever. I'm not saying I was a saint, but I was pretty easy. I have no idea where my twins get their tenacity and difficulties from and why I can't seem to hold it together. Maybe it's the LACK of witnessing my parents having to actually parent that I get my issues. Perhaps? Page 35 explained my situation somewhat: I wouldn't say I was underparented as much as I would call it non-stressful. The author even admits that she herself didn't get better about controlling her actions without the help of her family and a therapist. So, obviously, we'll all need a little more help than just a book.

There are a few topics that hit home or resonated deep for me. But the writing style is so familiar and conversational that I lose most of the respect for an author I want to feel while reading about situations that are so important to me and my little ones. I get that some people need to hear harsh truths and it can be easier to put into laymen's terms facts in a conversational way, but there's a flipside: when you write so conversationally, then the point may get lost in all of the colloquialisms and curse words.

The first 40 or so pages are an introduction of varying ways of losing your sh*t and why and when we'll read about that later in the book. There's no meat until half-way and we're still discussing broad topics of pushing buttons and triggers.

I do really appreciate how the author references other chapters throughout. Where to look for more in-depth experiences in certain areas.

All in all, the book is at most relatable. I'd suggest this more for someone who isn't looking for solid answers on how to cool their tempers with their kids but for someone who wants to feel not alone. My take-home message from everything she mentioned hereto is to "notice" when you're about to blow your fuse. Then and only then can you stop it from happening.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC.

Very different parenting book. When I was first pregnant I inhaled all sorts of parenting book to try and determine what kind of parent I want to be. I was all about peace and love and trying to understand my kids.

That went out the window fast.

I am the Mom of two kids. A 13 year old girl and a 11 year old boy and they test me every single day. Eye Rolls, etc. I wish that I had read this book back when my kids were younger as they are a little older to relate to some of the stories, but the book isn't really about the kids. The book is about us, as parents. Its about how we do sometimes lose our sh*t (or in my case, how I often lose my sh*t)

I strongly, STRONGLY suggest you read the book in order and not skip chapters. It all ties together and it all makes sense and brings on a lot of self awareness for triggers and all.

Thank you again netgally for the Arc

Meh. Nothing new here. I think I was expecting a good laugh at the ridiculousness we all go through as parents sometimes. Everything here can be found in other parenting books. Cuss words don't offend me - but I feel like using one in the title sets a reader up to expect a certain type of book and this wasn't it.

I remember so clearly the kind of parent I was going to be before I had kids...and then I became a parent. Our kids are kind, funny, curious, loving and they can totally make me lose my shit. We have two boys who are two years apart in age and parenting can feel like a total rollercoaster ride. No matter how hard you try, you are not going to be a perfect parent.

"When it comes to parenting, being awesome and screwing up are not mutually exclusive." -Carla Naumburg

I can recall with such vivid memories how completely overwhelmed I was when our first son was a baby because the physically demanding aspects of parenting an infant who cried a lot and slept, umm, not a lot were 24/7. I was exhausted. As the years went by and we added a second child, not only did parenting feel physically hard but it became emotionally hard. This is also when we entered the stage of "losing our shit".

You think it won't happen to you, but then it does. Have you ever tried strapping a screeching toddler into a car seat while they are whacking you in the face while also making their entire body as straight and stiff as a board? Have you ever wanted to take a 3-minute shower without referring two children who are fighting over a toy neither one has previously played with in years? Have you ever been on a last minute work phone call and had to say "I am going to have to call you back" because you can't hear anyone over the screeching of your children in the background of the car, who you previously explained to that you needed to make this important phone call? There are thousands of more examples, but this is just an example of how you may get to the "losing your sh*t" zone of parenting.

How to Stop Losing Your Sh*t with Your Kids is a relatable and approachable discussion about the stresses of modern-day parenting. Naumburg starts with defining why parents can sometimes lose it, and then goes into the different steps of how you work towards losing it less.

TRIGGERS: Understand your triggers...we all have them even though they may be very different.

AWARENESS. Know what pushes your buttons and own it.

REFLECT. Having some insight into the WHY can help you have a plan.

REDUCE TRIGGERS: Work on reducing triggers. This makes you feel less out of control and enables you to be more proactive when you get into moments of frustration.

COMPASSION. Have compassion both with yourself and with your children...and really, the world around you. When you can look at something from a more empathetic viewpoint, it is easier to own the situation and then move forward. You always have another chance to have a more positive interaction.

SET YOURSELF UP FOR SUCCESS. In a fast-paced world, parents are juggling more things than ever before. Finding ways to take care of yourself actually makes YOU a better parent. Find your village and support system and choose wisely when saying YES...the fewer overcommitments the fewer triggers you might have. Unitask when you are able...multitasking usually causes nothing to get done well and often results in massive frustration levels for all.

I found this book to be approachable and real, yet also great at calling out what our issues might be so we can be more proactive about them in the future. There was a great balance of reflection and action no matter what your situation or triggers. Naumburg strives for progress, not perfection which feels attainable when you are in the thick of it.

Naumburg discusses with great detail how to catch yourself when you are in or about to enter a "losing it" moment and has reachable suggestions such as "notice, pause and do literally anything else". I loved the section on compassion, both with ourselves and with our children. When we lose it, which will still happen sometimes, no matter how many things we put in place to stop it, the most important thing we can do is own it.

Reconnecting with ourselves can help guide us to why we might have reacted that way and provide us an opportunity to think about practical things we can put in place to help it from happening again...such as scheduling self-care, reaching out to our support system, etc.

Another step in compassion is reconnecting with our children. Getting calm and apologizing is one of the most powerful parts we can do, not only to repair and respect our relationships with our kids but also to help them see how powerful talking through moments can be for both parties.

I found so many parts of this book helpful and highly recommend it to any parent who is looking for proactive and attainable advice. Thank you to NetGalley and Workman Publishing Company for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I cannot download book. Will update if ever able to obtain a copy. Did a 3 star for neutral, was very upset because I was looking foward to this book.

I appreciate that the author is honest about her struggles to stay calm as a parent and she reminds the reader that parenting is hard and none of us are perfect. Based on the title I expected the book to be written in an accessible, maybe even irreverent way, but after a while the trying-too-hard-to-sound-like-your-buddy tone began to wear on me. There also isn't much information in the book. All of it could be summed up in a great blog post instead of a full length book.

I read this book in a day, as it hits close to home with myself and my family.  Tired of hippy-dippy bullshit, I liked the "practical" aspect from the subtitle, and I was not disappointed.

I don't lose my temper with my daughters often, but often enough that I know it is a problem.  No one is listening when I'm yelling, just a scramble to shut up the yelling person.  Then everything goes back to what started the yelling.  Cycle repeat, for, what, a couple years now?  

This book has more practical advice than what I've read before, with actual to-do lists of how to identify triggers, how to prevent losing it when you are triggered, and how to cope after a shit-loss. (I know "shit-loss" isn't a word, but it really should be.)

I'm already noticing my triggers, using the advice from this book.  I always thought my kids' behavior was the trigger, but now I'm looking at what I was doing/thinking prior to my failure to control myself.  I haven't had long enough to see if these techniques of self evaluation will show positive results, but I'm optimistic, just based on how realistic the advice is for an actual person in a real home to use.

I have a scientific background, and I strongly recommend you follow the advice in Chapter 1... do NOT skip to Chapter 8 to get to the real advice.  The majority of the book focuses on why you lose your temper and understanding the root of the problem is better than learning tips and techniques that fail long-term.  This is what I've tried in the past and that failed, so to repeat that pattern would be a waste.  

The end of the book as a TL;DR version of the main points, and I'd love to see that as a printable for my fridge, something I could refer back to on a bad day.

I highly recommend for any parent or anyone working with children.