Excellent book by Mary DeMuth on how a church should respond to sexual abuse. As a sexual abuse survivor herself, she goes into great detail about how a church should respond to someone who discloses their assault. She goes into detail on how not to respond and how a church should not sweep something as major as sexual assault under the rug. DeMuth integrates true stories from various survivors and their advice on a church's response...that the church needs to be protecting and ministering to the victim instead of the protecting and enabling the perpetrator. We hear of cases of how a church minister or priest will molest a child, only for the church to deal with it quietly by sending the priest/minister to another church and telling the victim to not say anything. We hear of cases of this in the media, where someone is a perpetrator and the family basically enables this person. But the author makes it clear that sexual assault of any kind is not only a sin against God but also a crime. Mary is a very empathetic author who is not preaching from a glass tower but who has been through the pain of being sexually violated, so she writes from her heart about her own experience. and uses that experience to help other survivors.

Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

This book was provided by NetGalley and Harvest House Publishers in exchange for a review.

"DeMuth has written 39 books, including a fictional trilogy featuring an abusive father character, a volume on parenting, and her latest, We Too, about how the Christian church can respond to sexual assault crises. This is the book that DeMuth tells me she "was meant to write." Its pages brim with expertise: DeMuth knows the world of abuse in a tragically intimate way, and she has been advocating for preventative and responsive care for abuse survivors since the 1990s, long before #MeToo or #ChurchToo — which chronicles sexual harassment and assault in churches and Christian settings — ever trended on Twitter."

Read more at https://www.bustle.com/p/rachael-denhollander-is-sharing-her-stories-of-sexual-assault-in-a-new-book-she-isnt-the-only-one-18718209.

This was a really difficult book to read because of the subject. I have not experienced sexual assault or abuse personally, by the grace of God. I do know I was sheltered from a lot by parents who took their role as protector very seriously. But even so, it could have been me.

I have many friends who have been on the receiving end of the types of horrific incidents described in this book. Many have been understandably hesitant to share their pain and continued grief. Most have been ignored or not believed at some point, dismissed without compassion. It is sadly true that much of this has occurred within the American church. Mary DeMuth has been a voice at the front of those working to protect women and children within the church from predators. Her own horrifying childhood experience has given her a relevant voice in our culture. One of firm determination to expose the truth and find justice for victims.

One important area which she deals with heavily is the problem of pornography in our society. It has never been okay, but the ease with which it is available and the increased violent and pervasive acts portrayed are far beyond what it was 30 years ago. This deplorable industry is fast growing and the money made from it fuels even more. Women and children are preyed upon to a degree many of us cannot fathom. It reminds me of ancient Rome and the culture of sexual depravity woven in and out of that society. This is nothing new. Satan merely finds new ways to entice and addict. Sadly the cycles continue when children find sexual perversion normalized. Of course, ever individual is responsible for their own actions no matter what has been done to them, but those who have faced trauma unchecked struggle more to say no to the temptations.

We as the church must rise and stand against these sins and lawless acts. The call to action is clear and must be heeded. When a victim is finally able to face what happened to them and tell someone, they must not be ignored. Truth should prevail, and they need to know they are believed.

I encourage you to pick up a copy of this title. You will gain perspective from personal experience and learn compassion for those who are grieving. But for the grace of God, it could have been me. I am blessed to not have the nightmarish past to confront, but that does not give me cause to ignore the problem.

"We Too" is a timely narrative in the wake of the stream of sexual abuse scandals in churches and ministries. DeMuth has woven together stories of survival (including her own) with statistics to compel leaders toward action. She emphasizes believing survivors. Statistically, they are most likely telling the truth. Distrust of their experiences will retraumatize survivors.

Demuth's courageous storytelling will empower other survivors to speak up. Hopefully, "We Too" will ignite passive bystanders to be listeners and advocates for survivors.

I am still trying to turn all of my thoughts into a coherent review, so more may follow.

I received a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I feel woefully inadequate in writing a review for We Too. I’ve read it twice. The second time taking pages and pages of notes trying to prompt my poor memory to organize, store, and be able to recall Mary’s incredibly researched and articulated work on this subject. I’m reviewing my notes and just want to shout them over and over so the ones in the back will start to listen and believe and repent and be the hands and feet of Jesus to survivors and advocates. We need a change in our churches or our sisters and brothers are going to walk right out the back door and never return. Because they have found more healing and hope in secular spaces than under the roofs of God’s people. If I am this sad and angry- I can only imagine how our God feels. Lord, may your justice be swift and complete. May this book land in the hands of those who love You and love others with a holy heart. That's you and that's me, but especially if you are in church ministry in any capacity, you need this book. I assumed I was a supporter and advocate for all survivors of abuse. However, I learned more from this book than I never even knew I didn't know. Don't be like me and assume everything is a-ok in your church or ministry. If 1 in 4 women in America will experience sexual assault in their lifetime, that means they are guaranteed to already be sitting in your pews, playing on your sports teams, serving on Sunday mornings, attending your bible studies, and living in houses the next street over. We, as followers of Jesus Christ, owe it to survivors to be informed, patient, unapologetic, swift-reporting, safe, and believing friends who come alongside for their entire journey - no matter how long it takes. Will you join us? A great first step is Mary's book, We Too.
Special thanks to #netgalley and the author and publisher for providing me with an advanced reader's copy of We Too: How the Church Can Respond Redemptively to the Sexual Abuse Crisis.

Abuse whether it is .verbal or sexual is wrong. When you are abused very young you think it is normal. You try to escape it but they keep on finding you. This is Mary's story of her abuse and how raw it is for her to still talk about it. It sounds like it happened yesterday and she is telling you about it. I think every body should read this book because it might save someone from the predators that are wanting to pounce on them. Very good book

This is a subject people don't want to talk about, but it must be brought to light. There are so many predators out there just waiting to make their move. I can't image the pain and the shame the victims go through. The church needs to be a safe place for victims of any type of abuse, not a place where people judge them. Thank you Harvest House Publishers via NetGalley for the ARC copy of this book. All opinions expressed are my own.

In this powerful book, Mary DeMuth shares her personal experiences of sexual abuse and discusses how the Church has not stepped up during this time of the MeToo Movement and in general with sexual abuse survivors. DeMuth talks about how the church needs to step up and be a place sexual abuse victims can turn to and rely on. The church needs to create opportunities for sexual abuse victims, meet them where they are and be a place to heal as well as help the survivors find justice, not judgment. The church cannot remain silent. The author weaves biblical examples throughout the book and offers practical solutions to the sexual abuse epidemic. Thank you to Netgalley and Harvest House Publishers for an ARC copy in exchange for an honest review.

Mary has tracked a subject most Don't want to deal with but needs to be discussed. May we not brush the topic aside but hear those who have been abused.

This book blew me away. The author's transparency of her own experiences really hit home. I think any woman can relate to the subtle acts of aggression described in this book, and it's time they were addressed. The author gives biblical examples and practical solutions to the sexual abuse crisis currently unfolding both in and out of the church. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

This book is extremely timely and relevant for where our culture finds itself. The author’s transparency and willingness to share her own personal story adds great depth to the book as a whole and each page is filled with wisdom on how the church should interact with sexual abuse victims, create opportunities to love them and be present, not silent in conversations surrounding this very important topic. I would certainly recommend this book to anyone in church leadership and any follower of Jesus as I believe this subject is so important to know how to navigate through.