I'm a sucker for stories about mothers and daughters while one (or both) are discovering their sexuality. This book definitely included plenty of that. I enjoyed seeing the existing bond between Beth and Susan, her mother, paired with the growing closeness she cultivates with Jackie, her birth mother. Actually, Beth's story proved to be the most interesting part of the book for me. I felt like the moments we spent in her head were some of the best written. The book is told in alternating first-person narration, which is not my favorite. That said, each character is distinct. I never found myself wondering who's thoughts I was inhabiting. I think the romantic plot builds nicely if occasionally stiltedly. Some of the ways things are wrapped up might be a bit on the nose but not in a way that diminishes the story as a whole. Overall, this is a sweet romance with bits of angst that gives the story more substance.

On the surface Create a Life to Love by Erin Zak is your typical sweet romance with an abusive husband and an adoption thrown in to give it some angst and gravity. Zak chose to split the narrative between both female leads Jackie and Susan and the 16-year old daughter Beth. We get a bit of both worlds (the mature and the young adult) with two romances for the price of one.

So Susan gets smacked around by her husband but stays in this toxic marriage because she wants to give Beth a stable home (huh?) Apparently Beth never notices any tension between her parents even though later in the book she turns out to be very sensitive to the moods/behavior of both Jackie and Susan. Beth is the model daughter but still steals her mother’s credit card, hires a PI to find her birthmother and hitchhikes to Florida to surprise her. That does not go so well. Jackie drives her all the way back to Georgia and meets the other mother. Insta attraction occurs.

When hubby finds out what happened he loses it (again) and hits Susan in the face where it’s really obvious. Beth finally gets a clue and they both pack a bag and leave the house post haste (with dog) to end up on Jackie’s doorstep. As you can expect that will cause some problems.

What is emphasized all through the book is that Susan is 100% straight, no lesbian thought ever crossed her mind in 50 years. When Jackie, an out and proud lesbian, cannot hide her attraction towards the other mother, Susan flips her wig and there’s a big blow up. Susan changes her mind pretty quick though, finds that one gay bone in her body and starts flirting with Jackie leaving me (the reader) and Jackie mighty confused.

I found both Jackie and Susan very erratic in their behavior towards each other. And Beth’s blossoming puppy love basically mirrored what her mothers had going on. Spending time with Beth took away from the main deal and I felt that time would have been better spend on deepening the main relationship. It felt unbalanced and too much was glossed over. Sadly I was not very impressed.

f/f

Themes: shades of Once Upon a Time, age gap, abusive husband, I’m straight but gay for you, so Jackie is an introverted asshole who doesn’t like people and yet she is the perfect host, the abusive asshat makes a surprise appearance towards the end, did he have a personality transplant?, Beth is a secret painter and apparently very prolific yet nobody (including her family) has ever seen anything and yet they know she is marvelously gifted, where did she do all this painting I wonder, I know I’m nitpicking but it bothered me, everything was too bloody perfect.

2.7 Stars

* A free copy was provided by Netgalley and Bold Strokes Books for an honest review.

Create a Life to Love by Erin Zak has a very risky premise that could have gone very wrong very fast, but Zak skillfully managed to turn it into a beautiful story about coming into your own, family and love. Create a Life to Love is told through 3 distinct POVs: Jackie, a lesfic romance novelist who gave up her baby for adoption 16 years ago, Susan the woman who adopted the child, and Beth, the now-teenage daughter.

The book starts with Beth, 16-year-old, who hitchhiked from Savannah, Georgia to St-Petersburg, Florida, to go knock on her biological mother’s door. Shocked, Jackie drives her back home and spends the night at their house before heading back to Florida and trying to put this ordeal behind and somehow get back to her life.

A couple of days later, Beth, Susan and their dog find themselves on Jackie’s porch needing a place to stay. From there, the story unfolds into something very special and unique.

The attraction between the two moms is pretty insta-love, but we get to see them process their thoughts, feelings and uncertainties in a way that makes them feel authentic and believable. We also get to see Beth learn more about her own family, coming to terms with their situation and learning more about Jackie. We see her grow and discover a confidence she didn’t think she possessed. My heart broke for her at times, but damn, I am so proud of her! There are also really sweet moments where Jackie and Susan describe how they notice their daughter flourish and becoming comfortable with who she is.

As I said, this entire premise (adoptive straight mom and the biological lesbian mother falling for each other) is pretty far-fetched. It’s the kind of thing you see in TV movies and you kind of roll your eyes at, but the characters - at least Susan - acknowledge how crazy and surreal their whole situation is at just the right time, in a way that makes it all okay. It has the reader believe it’s possible, without questioning it further.

It’s well-written, the story flows well and the characters are well-fleshed out. I love how art is incorporated into the story without monopolizing the plot. If it’s not clear yet, I love this book! I’m going to buy the paperback and I will definitely check out the other titles Erin Zak has released. Highly recommend!

Favorite moment:

“Don’t stop because an old, straight, white guy doesn’t know how to deal with people that aren’t exactly like him.”

Thank you to Bold Strokes Books and NetGalley for providing me with a free copy of this title in exchange for an honest review.

Wow! The concept of this story seemed a bit unbelievable to me upon reading the synopsis, however I had to try. I am so glad that I did. This story was wonderful.

My only critique is that the development of the characters as individuals needed more depth. I would have liked to know more about the family that pressured Jackie. I would have liked to see all of the characters develope more slowly and authentically. This could have easily been a 500pg book, without any sort of lag, the story is that good.

So I really wanted to love this book. And the first chapter really did grab my attention; however as the book progressed, I found myself a craving more dialogue, more actual interaction, more do not tell from the characters. I didn't mind at all the its told in first person from Jackie, Susan, and even Beth. I do wish the focus was more on just Jackie and Susan because Beth's story seemed like it should be her own and because so much was trying to be crammed into the book details, events, timelines that could have been explored were not. The book in a sense deals with two very heavy topics, adoption and violence. While the first is addressed nicely throughout the book, the second really is not and then when it's time to it's sort of brushed aside. I really did want to like it and while it's not 2star read, it's not a 3star for me either so I would give it 2.5stars.

This one was good. I just found myself wanting more because it felt like something was missing for me. I did enjoy the characters and the romance but I can't put my finger on what was missing.

I'm a bit conflicted about this book as firstly it's the first f/f book that I've read and there's the lesbian romance writer Jackie that gave up her daughter at birth, a teenager girl , Beth , Jackie's daughter, involved in the book with the usual age drama and also the adoptive mother Susan that had an abusive relationship with her husband while growing up Beth.
Told in first person pov of each woman, was an interesting read with a few twists and turns and I for one, enjoyed Beth's arc more than the other two women. The writing was good and held my interest, but the story overall wasn't exactly what I wanted for a 5 stars read.

Received an ARC from Netgalley in exchange for a honest review. I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

I’ve read Erin zak’s Falling into her and loved it and I was really excited for this book. But this I’m not too sure about. It’s moving to fast for me.. within minutes of meeting Jackie is already falling for Susan and it’s getting tiring to read about the lesbian whos always drooling after the lonely “straight” woman who hasn’t felt love in quite some time. Of course there had to be a reason for Susan to be single again. The gay panic and the denial is getting kinda old. I feel like I’ve read this time and time again. The story got a little bit better towards the end, but I would only say that it’s an okay book.

wrestled with the rating on this book, because there were so many things I enjoyed, but there were parts that fell flat for me. I enjoyed that there were actually three leads in the book, Jackie, Susan, and young Beth. Then, there's the found family narrative, which I usually enjoy. On the flip side, I thought the domestic abuse story-line was ultimately unsatisfactory, and there were more than a few moments of cringey internal dialog.

So, there are three complete story arcs here. Beth, who is struggling with all aspects of her identity. Susan, a middle aged woman seemingly stuck in a loveless and abusive relationship. Finally, aimless Jackie. These three women have almost equal "screen time", and I enjoyed their personal arcs. Each person has a pretty distinct voice, given that the story is told in first person. I liked that Susan's thoughts are more formal, Jackie is less formal, while teenage Beth is sometimes all over the place. On the other hand, there are some moments of cringe worthy internal dialogue, especially for the older women. Also, Beth is a little too much of an old soul, but there are some great teenage moments that help balance themselves out.

The major thing that dropped the rating for me was the way the domestic violence arc ended. As many reviewers have pointed out, it is a difficult subject to tackle. I actually thought the panic Susan felt was on point, but then it faded away into the background once the romance was more in play. So when the resolution happened it felt way too easy. I am torn on the ending because it does show a little humanity for her husband, yet no offered real consequences (except the loss of his family) for what was years of abuse.

I would still recommend it for the intensity that Zak can bring to the page, and that all three women are equally important to each other's arcs. Read it for the feelings as Susan and Jackie explore their relationship, and for Beth's adorable arc as well. I can understand if the domestic abuse arc is a no go for some people.

Interesting premise that could have fallen flat, but the quality of the writing kept the momentum and a believe in the plot going. The interplay between the two leading women was great. I also liked the side story of the daughter exploring her sexuality at the same time as her mother. It didn’t need wrapping up with a bow at the end, the husband scene was unnecessary.

Beth is the most well adjusted and cool teenager I have read about in a fiction story. I kept waiting for her to do something teenagery. I thought she was more mature than Jackie.

It's a sweet story without much drama. I can't say much without spoiling the story, only that the writer keeps you on the edge of the chair with doom on the horizon. Mostly I liked how Jackie learned to be a mom to Beth. I found Susan to be less interesting, her back story is a common one. Albeit still sad. But like most if not all romance book it has a sweet ending.

Refreshing, entertaining read. I enjoyed the multiple points of view and understood early on that this modern tale would appeal to a YA crowd. While the adults in the room, Jackie and Susan sort out their lives and loves, the teenager Beth brings all three women together when she shows up on her birth mother’s doorstep. Let the fish out of water story telling begin.

I can see this being a great YA read for teens. There is angst and some domestic violence but it is toned down to add appropriate shock value while advancing the plot. Jackie’s ordered life is disrupted and yes,all might be fairy tale in setting and risky behaviour by Beth but I can see this appealing to closeted teens looking for a story they would love to be featured in. I got all sorts of warm fuzzies reading this.

My first Erin Zak. Won’t be my last.

ARC received with thanks from publisher via NetGalley for review.

For the most part, this book was quite good. The premise of the story and the characters were decently written but it just missed the mark for me. There were three stories in this book but I feel like one suffered. Jackie and Susan's chemistry, was great and Beth and Peggy's story of first love kept me entertained, but the main story suffered. I did not feel like beth and Jackie had a real relationship by the end of the book and the antagonist in their story seemed too forced and then was conveniently discarded when the author needed a happy ending.

If you don't mind a few inconsistencies and you are looking for an easy read then you should give this book a try because despite everything it is not a bad story to read.

The best part about this novel is the author’s attempt to try a different format of storytelling within the lesfic romance genre, and technically she manages to do a half decent job of it. For the most part one is able to distinguish each voice from the others. What is also interesting is the premise of the novel where the biological mother enters the picture later and falls in love with her daughter’s adoptive mother. This was a clever twist in the usual process of a person having to establish a relationship with the kid(s) of her lover. However, it is in the serious issues that the author falls a little short of expectations. Throughout the better part of the book, the reader is on tenterhooks expecting everything to go pear-shaped at any point, leading to a lot of angsty drama, but nothing happens. In fact, things get resolved too easily leaving the reader feeling a little cheated.

This one was a bit hard to rate, parts of it I enjoyed, others not so much. It was much better than Zak’s debut book, but not as good as Breaking Down Her Walls in my opinion. I thought the premise was interesting and I like that this was a new idea that we have not really seen done before. With so many romances out there that is not easy to do. I just felt a few things didn’t come together all the way.

This book is told in first person, in the POV of three main characters; two adults and one teenager. I actually didn’t mind the multiple POV’s, I thought that Zak did a great job of giving all of the characters their own unique voice. Because of the different POV’s this book almost felt part YA romance and part adult romance. Again, I actually liked that as both romance were sweet. The problem I had was there did not seem to be enough dialogue for my personal tastes. There was a lot of inner reflections and inner conflict, that I felt got repetitive after a while. I wanted the characters just to talk more and further the story that way.

I do have to give a slight trigger warning since one of the main characters is in an abusive marriage. There is some abuse “on screen” so to say, but most of it is talking/thinking about what happened in the past. I do have to say I didn’t think Zak handled this part of the book as well as the rest. Not to give anything away but how this storyline resolved had me scratching my head. It just didn’t seem to fit with the rest of the book.

As I mentioned already, I thought both romances were sweet, but I almost found myself more invested in the YA one than the adult. There was nothing really wrong with the main romance, I just got tired of the “I’m straight so I can’t be attracted to a woman” line over and over. I felt like fine than the character should just move on, but since this is a romance, that can’t happen. And because of that I felt this part of the story dragged a bit.

There were a few other things that bothered me, that almost felt like inconsistencies or aspects about the characters I found hard to grasp. One of the mains is known as a hopeless romantic, but she also states that she is almost always an asshole to the women she dates. It felt like these two things didn’t really match. Also, the “straight” character was very put off that the lesbian character was interested in her, and made a little flirty move… than shortly after she starts questioning in her mind if the lesbian character could possible like her. Well yes she likes you, and you know that because you were just angry when she tried to show you that she likes you. Little things like this just caused me to question some of Zak’s choices.

Besides the book dragging in a few places, for the most part this was a pretty enjoyable book. This sure had some bumpity bumps but it was nice to see a different romantic premise than the norm. I can’t really put my personal recommendation on this one, but I definitely would not tell anyone to stay away. This book is in the middle and I think it will work for some people.

Things you need to do before reading this book:

Clear your schedule because once you start you’re going to want to just keep going.
Grab a big box of tissues
Make sure there is no one around to bother you while you read it (unless they are bringing you coffee or cocktails, then they can stay)
Okay…  organised? Well, let me tell you a little about how wonderful this book is...

When Beth shows up on romance writer, Jackie’s front door step, proclaiming to be her daughter she gave up for adoption, Jackie’s world tilts on its axis. But that’s nothing compared to the feelings brought forth by meeting Beth’s adoptive Mum, Susan. Susan and Jackie have an instant connection, but Susan is straight and married so nothing can ever happen. Right?

Erin Zak is definitely the dark horse of the Lesbian Fiction world, she is definitely one to watch. Create A Life To Love is a soulful story of how love can conquer all. I laughed, cried (sobbed) and got butterflies more than once, and did you see the cover art? Fantastic. The book has excellent pace and I was sucked in from the first sentence. I’m so glad that included Beth’s (Susan’s daughter) point of view because she is the heart of the story.

Let’s talk about Beth first. She a beautiful soul full of tenacity and courage. The relationship she builds with Jacqui throughout the book is beautiful and was the reason for so many of my tears. She is also incredibly accepting of Jackie and the fact she’s a lesbian.

There were these moments of simplicity between the three of them, but the reality was that there was nothing simple going on in their heads. All three protagonists were going through a roller coaster ride of emotions but were completely supported by each other. Such a solid family from the beginning.

From the minute Jackie and Susan meet there is a palpable chemistry between them and it builds quite quickly through the book. I really connected with Susan on a few different levels, she was probably my favourite character. She was an awesome mum and watching her coming into her own was actually really amazing to watch. The sex scenes in this book are off the chart sexy while still beautiful and intimate.

I am such a sucker for a good Epilogue and this one can’t not be mentioned. It was fantastic and tied everything up in a red big bow. I just adored these characters and by end of the book wanted to start it all over again.

Unequivocally 5 Stars!

ARC received via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Ok, I’m not really sure how to review this one, it started off well, but I liked it less the longer it went on.

Unlike most lesfic, this is told from three POVs. First MC is Jackie who is a lesfic writer who gave up a baby 16 years ago. Second MC is Susan, the adoptive mother of said baby, and the third MC is Beth, the child who was given up.

The story starts with Beth showing up on Jackie’s doorstep. Jackie is of course thrown by this, since the adoption was closed and she wasn’t ever expecting to see the child she’d given up. She takes Beth home and meets Susan, and is instantly drawn to her.

Problem is that Susan is in an abusive marriage, and through a series of circumstances, she and Beth end up going to stay with Jackie. Now, this was actually an interesting premise, and I liked the first third of the book and how it set all of this up, but once Beth and Susan arrive in Florida with Jackie the story stars to veer into ‘oh, come on’ territory.

First, Susan falls for Beth, this is, of course, not unexpected since that’s what the book is about, but the way it happens was too, I don’t know, overly sweet while also being full of pitfalls? For me anyway. I mean, Jackie does say to Susan that she does not want to be her experiment or her rebound, and honestly, at no point did I believe that Susan had undergone enough recovery from what happened to her to believe that Jackie wasn’t both of those things.

Meanwhile, we’re also subjected to Beth’s love story, which mimics her mother’s fairly closely (without the abuse), and was not at all needed, there was already enough going on without adding that too. I also found parts of Beth’s story to be ridiculous. First, she hitch-hikes to see Jackie the first time and neither woman points out how incredibly stupid and dangerous that is? The kid had a credit card, why the hell didn’t she take a bus? Of course these are the same grown ass women that let their 16 year old just stay at a bar with people she barely knows, so what do I know.

The time frame was all over the place too, everything in the first 60 percent or so seemed to happen in a few weeks, and then a few moths had gone by, it was weird. The end of the book was also too overly HEA for me, the art competition, husband, and epilogue all had me saying the aforementioned ‘oh, come on!’.

I did like the characters, and I loved watching Beth and Jackie’s relationship grow, and that neither woman was threatened by the other when it came to Beth. If they hadn’t lived with Jackie from the outset and instead had gotten to know each other over a longer time period I probably could have bought into it more, but I just never really bought into them as a couple when all I saw was Susan clinging to someone who was kind to her when that was what she needed. 3 stars, that’s all I can give it.

How talented do you have to be to write 3 point of views and keep the reader interested and that is exactly what Zak did by showing us her writing abilities as her smooth easygoing writing style that keeps the pages turning I fell head over heals into this story.

The story starts out with Beth finding her
biological mother Jackie 16 yrs later who turns out to be a well know lesbian romance author and all around cool person, then enter Susan the woman that adopted Beth and this is where the story starts to get interesting as the 3 of them start to get to know each other. As the story develops the chemistry between Jackie and Susan was spot on and I found myself routing for them, Zak does an amazing job of taking us on an emotional journey that pulls us through to the happy ending that we all look for in a good romance book.

I was given an advance readers copy by the publisher through Netgalley

16 years ago, Romance writer Jackie Mitchell gave up a child for adoption. She considers herself to be an introvert and also doesn't overall like people. She spends time writing and with a close knit group of friends. Her world is turned upside down when her adopted turns up on her doorstep unexpectedly. Warning - If you have issues with Domestic violence, you might want to skip with one because there are scenes of domestic violence or flashbacks of some).

This romance is told from 3 different people - Jackie, Beth (her daughter) and Susan (Beth's Adoptive mother). After Beth shows up on her moms doorstep, Jackie drive Beth back to Savannah Ga and Jackie is instantly attracted to Susan and Susan is married to Steven is attracted to Jackie. After leaving Savannah and returning home, Jackie finds Beth and Susan on her doorstep a few days later after an incident at home.

I am really not sure how I want to categorize this one. In many ways, the story didn't seem believable but Zak still makes the story likeable. I enjoyed the story of all three MCs. Both daughter and adoptive mom learn some things about themselves and grow to love Jackie. I am not really sure what to say about Jackie except that she is a likeable character even though she has been someone selfish in her past. I think I mostly enjoyed reading about Beth and Susan's transformation.

I will rate this one 3.5 stars.

Writing a novel from the perspective of multiple protagonists must be daunting. Having the reader be able to discern each character and enter a new headspace has to be difficult and I give it up to any writer that goes for it. Erin Zak tackles it head-on and introduces three amazing women that love with all their hear even in the toughest of circumstances. 

Jackie Mitchell, a successful lesbian romance author. This writer is an introvert, often going long periods of time writing and avoiding human contact. She does have a close group of friends that are a great support system for her. Jackie, for the most part, enjoys women when she wants companionship but keeps it strictly friends with benefits. She does not want a relationship and is often leery of meeting new people. Jackie's well-constructed world is turned upside down when the daughter she gave up at birth arrives on her doorstep.

Sixteen-year-old Beth Weber hitch-hicked her way from Savannah to St. Petersburg to meet her bio-mom Jackie. Beth has no idea what to expect of Jackie but she has to see for herself and damn the consequences. Since the teen found out she was adopted her mind constantly wonders about the woman who gave her up and what the circumstances were that brought her to that decision. 

Beth's adoptive mother is Susan Weber. Susan is really the catalyst for Beth and Jackie moving from the nice to meet you phase into something more. Here is where things get tricky in the story. Susan is being abused by her husband. He has affairs, stays away from home for days on end and he also puts his hands on his wife when he becomes angered. Susan would tell any woman in her shoes to leave but for some reason cannot make herself go. When the husband finds out that Beth reached out to Jackie things go from bad to worse very quickly. Finally, she is pushed to run.

I was intrigued by the three points of view concept. I think multi-protagonists is often times really hard to pull off because you cannot dive all the way in. Most times you are constantly pulled in another direction at too fast of a speed. With that being said, it was really neat to be able to hear what was in Jackie, Beth and Susan's head but I almost always for wished I could have just a little more each time. This book tackles seriously heavy issues. Abuse, coming out, self-worth, divorce...and at times it felt like the romance (I can't believe I am writing this) took over when we should have been fleshing out the major complex emotional issues. Things were glossed over just a bit too smoothly for the weight of the issues in my opinion. I liked the story, I liked the characters, I just wanted more. I felt like everything was wrapped up with a perfect ending when we needed more chapters to hammer this out in a realistic way.