Cover Image: The List of Things That Will Not Change

The List of Things That Will Not Change

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Member Reviews

Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for providing me with an DRC of this title for review. All opinions are my own.

This was a sweet middle grade novel about a young girl who splits her time between her divorced parents, is excited for her dad's upcoming marriage to his boyfriend Jesse, hopes for a sister, and struggles to get over the mistakes she has made in the past. The story is told in an almost "vignette" style, with Bea narrating events from the past (2 years ago, 4 years ago, 6 months ago) as her dad plans his wedding. Along the way she has to come to terms with her feelings, her guilt, her anxiety, and what happens when what you hope for doesn't actually end up happening.

Highly recommend. This is a first purchase type of book. Recommended for grades 4-7.

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I really enjoyed this heartwarming story about a young girl coming to grips with the changes in her life. It is beautifully written and feels so incredibly real that you could almost feel like you were spending time with Bea and her family.

Bea is a lovely young lady, who has issues, but she is learning to deal with them. I loved the supportive network that surrounds her, her parents, her babysitter Sheila, her dad’s boyfriend Jesse and her therapist, as well as her friends. So many supportive adults, I just loved seeing that. I also loved the fact that Bea is a worrier, which I think many kids are, but she is learning to deal with it. Plus she has eczema, which I don’t think I have run across in a book before. Her dreams of having a sister don’t quite work out at first, but she and Sonia are well on their way to becoming the sisters they both deserve.

The story is great. It is mostly just a small slice of Bea’s life since the divorce and leading up to her dad’s wedding. There are flashbacks/memories of things from her past that still bother her. But there is lots of things going on in the present as well. This is a quiet book, not a lot of fast action or excitement, but it is so heartwarming and emotional that I think middle grade kids will just enjoy it for that alone.

A wonderful book that I think kids will enjoy, especially the message of love and friendship.

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I ended up having to DNF it. I tried to start reading it, but it was just really hard to get into . I am sure someone else will enjoy it though.

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I always enjoy Rebecca Stead's books for middle-grade readers because she creates such charming young misfit narrators. This one features a girl named Bea who discovers that there's more than one way to make a family. She's quite adaptable, and she's enthusiastic about the changes coming into her life, but it's complicated. Some people will never accept that love is love is love is love, even when it's not traditional. The loving adults around Bea model for her how to stay hopeful and positive in the face of cruelty. I especially appreciated that the author did not whitewash the difficulties, and at the same time managed to inject a lot of whimsy and joy into the story.

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I have been a fan of Rebecca Stead's books for years. But this one for me, didn't quite hit the mark. The basic storyline is Bea's parents are getting divorced because her father fell in love with another man. To keep her life as normal as possible, they help her make a list of things in her life that will stay the same. The story unfolds from there with the ups and downs of her life with divorced parents. It's a very timely story and very relatable. But there is something in the way it's written that dumbs down Bea's experience and intelligence as a child who really does get it. Enjoyable for sure, but not my favorite by Stead.

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I first found Stead through her Newbery Medal winning book, When You Reach Me. Rebecca Stead is back with another lovely and heartfelt Middle Grade novel. Full of charm, humor, compassion, and a delightful story, Stead manages to display her fantastic ability to delve right into the mind and heart of another young girl, just at the beginning of leaving childhood behind in yet another wonderful novel.

After the divorce of her parents a few years back, Bea is settling into a life divided (honestly, this book would serve well to adults, too—pre-divorce—on How to Divorce with Dignity and With Your Child's Interests First), when her father announces that he and his fiancé, Jesse, are planning on marrying. The absolute normalcy with which this marriage between two men was handled was such a breath of fresh air—and though a bit of trouble does find its way to them later in the book, there is never any doubt about the closeness and love between this unifying family.

As Bea leads the reader up to the wedding day, she shares various anecdotes and impactful emotional memories that bridge the story from divorce announcement to wedding day. Her anxieties, her worries, her guilt, her fears, and her joys are perfectly in tune with her age. Sweet without being sappy, endearing without being manipulative, I was especially happy to read about the supportive group, including a counselor/therapist, surrounding Bea on her journey. This is a book I will pass on to my kids, and I book I wish was around when I was the target age. Brilliant.

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Heartfelt, innocent, filled with love, uncertainty and trust in those whose job is to always provide a safe place to land, Rebecca Stead’s THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE is NOT written for adults. It is written for younger readers, told in the voice of a young girl who is experiencing life after divorce and while many things DO change, one thing young Bea knows, the love in her family is always there, no matter how its dynamics have been altered.

Parents do not have to stay together, but they do owe their children a continuity of love, and security and Bea’s parents are what ALL divorced couples should be like. Beautifully told, steeped in family love, acceptance of circumstances and respect, Rebecca Stead has given voice to a child’s experience as an innocent caught up in the affairs of adults without earning the lasting scars of pain, hurt and the venom so many parents spew.

Perfect for middlegrade readers, on up, just remember to “see” things as Bea does! Your heart will warm to this incredible tale. Give it as a gift for a family who may be facing major changes.

I was invited to receive a complimentary ARC edition by Wendy Lamb Books! This is my honest and voluntary review.

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This is a great addition to the world of contemporary middle grade. Bea has a great support network of friends and adults in her life to keep her grounded and connected. The pacing of the story and Stead's language puts the reader right into the mix as Bea experiences all the changes in her world.

read this as an e-ARC from Netgalley.

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What a sweet, big-hearted book! Rebecca Stead always hits her mark and this one is no different. Bea is about 12 years old, but most of the book takes is reflective of her 5th grade year. Bea's parents are divorced and gave her a notebook with a list of things that wouldn't change because of their divorce when she was 8. One thing that did change is that Dad is getting married to his boyfriend, Jesse. This means Bea is getting a sister and dealing with her family dynamic shifting at least a little. The thing I thought this book did beautifully was it's handling of the therapeutic process. Bea has a truly wonderful therapist who helps learn to unpack big feelings and grow. Some of my favorite parts of this book took place in Miriam's office.
This is a super fast read, but one that will linger in my mind for awhile. Thank you Rebecca Stead for writing books that help kids feel seen!
I recieved this galley from Wendy Lamb Books in exchange for a fair and honest review.

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Another great Rebecca Stead book. It's a much needed representation for kids of a what therapy and dealing with stresses in life can be like. Bea is sweet and realistic and painfully open. It's also a heartwarming look at how a family changes and evolves and how you can both learn to deal with, accept, and enjoy that while still being sad sometimes too. There are no easy answers or ways of dealing with the many issues that come up in the book and I think that kind of honesty is so important for middle grade and middle school.

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When Bea’s mom and dad got divorced she started a list of things that wouldn’t change - primary being that they all still loved each other and would always be a family. What has changed it that her dad started dating Jesse and was planning on getting married. While Bea was excited about having 2 dads she was nervous about meeting her new sister. She was also carrying a secret about something she did in anger. Can Bea learn to forgive and be forgiven and learn to be part of a new family?
Not gonna lie - the ending didn't work for me. I know there was a tie in back to the beginning of the book but the thread wasn't strong enough for me...
This was a solid middle grade fiction book.

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The List of Things That Will Not Change was a super fast, enjoyable read! The main character is lovable right from the get go. and by the end you love her even more. Rebecca Stead does wonderful job writing from the viewpoint of a tween girl with anxiety dealing with her parents' divorce and everything that comes after.

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The List of Things That Will Not Change just reinforces my opinion that Rebecca Stead is a master of middle grade fiction. Her characters are one-hundred percent wonderful, believable, and realistic. (And I read a lot of middle grade fiction as a homeschooling mama of three boys.)

This book provides a safe place to land for any child who has lived through divorce, is part of a blended family, or who suffers from anxiety. My parents stayed married, but I was a worrier--a child who suffered from childhood anxiety without having a name for what I was feeling. Stead gently guides the main character, Bea, (and the reader) through actual therapy techniques that provide relief and reassurance.

When her parents sat her down to explain they were divorcing, they gave Bea a green notebook with a list of things that would not change--first and foremost, their love for her would never, ever change. Now, several years later, she still carries that notebook with her, and her father is marrying his boyfriend, Jesse. For Bea, this is an exciting new development, because she will be gaining a sister--Jesse's daughter Sonia. But all is not smooth sailing, and both Bea and Sonia have big feelings they need help navigating.

This book takes big feelings and breaks them down, exposing the feelings behind the feelings, and works through the process of forgiveness--especially forgiving yourself. Family relationships, big changes, friendship, sisterhood--Stead handles it all with gentleness and compassion. It's another book I'll definitely be recommending.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for my e-ARC in exchange for my honest review.

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I couldn't put this little prize down, and I would have easily devoured it in one sitting had I started to read it earlier in the day. Though a middle-grade book, the main character (Beatrice, omg, yes, please), resonated so very much with me; from the eczema to the anxiety to seeing a therapist about divorce and other things, just...wow. I'm speechless for all the right reasons. If I had a kid, I'd throw this book at them.

p.s. There were simply too many wonderful, favourite lines to highlight, but I did have one I desired to share:

"If you think about it, Bea, life is like a trip. A very long one. And what matters most is the people you travel with."

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The List of Things That Will Not Change is a beautiful story full of love and life. Bea's parents give her a green notebook with a green pen to record those things that will not change when they tell her they have decided to divorce. They have recorded the first things that will not change in her life - that they both love her and always will. She spends half her time with mom, and half her time with dad, and on the surface, Bea seems to be coping fairly well - unless you discount her deepening anxiety and eczema. When her father decides to remarry, Bea is thrilled; she adores her dad's fiance, Jessie. When she learns Jessie has a daughter close to her age, Bea is thrilled when she realizes she will finally have a sister of her own. But things are not always picture perfect. There is just the right amount of angst and sweetness balanced together for one unique, lovely story.

This book touches on a few current, sensitive topics including divorce, same-sex marriage, anxiety, along with juvenile talk therapy to help Bea navigate the changes in her life.

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I received this e-ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
Bea’s parents divorced when she was eight years old. The night they informed her of their decision, they gave her a green notebook to remember the things that WILL not change, number one being that Mom and Dad will always love her. Two years later, Dad is marrying his boyfriend, Jesse, and Bea will be gaining a sister. Bea is thrilled – she has always wanted a sister – but things do not go as smoothly as Bea had hoped. Bea narrates the story in the present and through flashback. She talks of her relationships with her friends, her parents, and her therapist, Miriam (the divorce was had on Bea).
This middle grade book from acclaimed author Rebecca Stead explores some heavy topics, like divorce and LGBTQ, which she does seamlessly. You feel Bea’s high and lows. I thought The List of Things That Will Not Change was similar to Holly Goldberg Sloan’s To Night Owl from Dogfish, although the latter is more appropriate for older readers. I would definitely recommend this book for fourth grade and up.
#TheListOfThingsThatWillNotChange #NetGalley

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Rebecca Stead is a great writer. She has written with wit and compassion in a variety of settings. This story is no exception. The List of Things That Will Not Change addresses a concern of many— children and adults — when faced with the inevitable changes that life throws at you. Are there verities that will sustain me when everywhere around me the world keeps shifting?
The book takes a fairly common theme in children’s literature, divorce and remarriage seen through the eyes of a child and raises the stakes by making the father gay. Young Bea and her nuclear family live in New York City and are pretty evolved. The father and his fiancé and the mother behave in loving and civilized ways. Even her school friends don’t give her too much grief. Naturally, however, issues arise, some are are constant in all blended families and others specific to single sex marriage. The story is told by ten year old Bea but refers back to her eight year old self as well. She is one of those children you often meet in books and rarely in real life. Mature beyond her years in some ways, but endearingly naive at other points. In order to appreciate this book, you must put aside your skepticism and accept the whole package of this complicated little girl. It is story with just enough drama to keep you turning the pages, and a feel-good ending that makes it worth the read. I wonder how Bea’s real life readers relate to her and her situation. Is this book a reflection of its time or part of the advance guard? I will read other reviews with interest.

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Very few authors understand the heart and mind of tween girls like Rebecca Stead. The balance of independence and need for adult support is dead on, as is the nature of friendships at that age. Would make a great choice for readers who are fans of A.S. King's The Year We Fell From Space.

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Rebecca Stead has consistently great books and The List of Things That Will Not Change is no different. Without reading the book's summary, I knew I wanted to read Stead's latest book. It's the story of a girl, Bea, whose parents divorce and her father remarries. In this marriage, Bea will gain a sister, which is what she wants dearly. All the adults (bar one) are good people who look out for and love Bea. The father is gay and that plays a role in some of the plot, but it's certainly not the only issue addressed. The book ends with Bea recognizing the importance of Uncle Frank to her dad, which you hope Bea and and her new sister will have. Just lovely.

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This story is as beautiful as they come. Stead has a way of inhabiting the feelings of middle grade so well - the slow realizations, the act of becoming who you are. I loved Bea’s long letters to Sonia, her conversations with Miriam, and her mom’s reaction to the bat. Also, best weird parenting win goes to the physical List of Things That Will Not Change, something every child of divorce should have.

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