Thanks to NetGalley and Wendy Lamb Books for my electronic ARC in exchange for my honest review. This is my first book by the author and I loved the title, but that’s about all.

When Bea’s parents announce they are getting a divorce they provide her with an actual list of things that will not change. But other than that cool concept the book fell flat for me. Best for middle-schoolers who are experiencing divorce.

Review posted on GoodReads.

I really loved Rebecca Stead’s books, “when you reach me” and “liar and spy”, I was very excited for her newest novel. It lived it up to my expectations! The writing and voice of our main character Bea is so truthful to an actual 10 year old. This light and quick read is very heartwarming and made me tear up in some spots. Definitely a must- read!

There are reasons that having a book released during this time of enormous uncertainty and shutdowns in our country (and around the world) could be considered unfortunate. But for two reasons, I think this book will stand out and succeed. One, the author Rebecca Stead is a celebrated Newbery winner (When You Reach Me) who has a huge following of fans. Two, this is the perfect book for young readers to devour hopefully easing some of the anxiety in their minds right now. Bea is an almost 13-year old girl telling the story of the year when she was 10 that her dad got married (to a man named Jesse) and she gained a sister. Her mom and dad had gotten an amicable divorce two years previously and she weaves in lots of her worries - small to more significant - and some of the coping strategies her therapist Miriam has taught her. She is such a likable character and it is heartwarming to see the amount of love and support her family has for her. I think this book has a cathartic quality to it - it is likely readers will identify with some of her worries and will relate well to her. I can’t wait to have my 10-year old read it.

Side note, when I first read the description of the book, it reminded me of another one I read recently To Night Owl From Dogfish by Holly Goldberg Sloan. They both deal with daughters of gay dads who were getting married and becoming sisters. I liked that book too, but I loved this one. And they are different and each worthy of their own praise.

Special thanks to NetGalley and Random House Children’s for my ARC! This book comes out soon - on April 7, 2020. Highly recommend! Would be a great read aloud for 4th or 5th graders or book for reading during quarantine. I believe it would calm an anxious child and chances are we have more of them now due to this crisis. Loved.

Rebecca Stead's work always has such a sweetness to it. I love the earnestness here, and the focus on emotions in such a realistic and healthy way. As a narrator, Bea has a winning combination of anxiety and positivity, and a sensitive insight into other characters that's really lovely to see. I really felt entirely carried along by the writing,, the heavy topics brought up are handled with care and at an explicable level for young people, and there's a great network of supporting characters. I did find the wedding incident a little strong/dramatic, although it did lend to the sense of realism (not everything always works out), and some of the back and forth between time periods was a bit much, but overall a really wonderful middle grade read.

The List of Things That Will Not Change, by Rebecca Stead, is a beautiful middle-grade story about a girl named Bea, and the years following her parents’ divorce. When Bea’s parents tell her they are divorcing, they present her with a notebook where they’ve started a list, “Things That Will Not Change.” They write things like, “Mom loves you more than anything, always,” “Dand loves you more than anything, always,” and “Mom and Dad love each other, but in a different way,” and encourage Bea to also write more on the list as she thinks of things that other things that will always remain the same. Throughout the book, Bea does write things in the notebook, and processes a lot of big feelings with the help of her amazing parents, supportive friends and her therapist, who, in my opinion is brilliant. The story covers a span of about two years, and we see Bea struggle and grow, as her family changes.

Bea has some anxiety, and her therapist, whom she sees weekly, is just really great in helping her. She is patient and comes up with ways to help Bea trust her, as well as tools that help Bea successfully process her grief, anger, and control her anxiety. One thing I loved was the suggestion of having a specific “worry time,” and trying to acknowledge anxious thoughts but telling them to wait until that specific daily time when Bea would think about them. I touch on this because as a teacher and parent, I know it can be difficult to find mental health care, and then when you do, it can still be hard to find the right fit and establish that connection. It was refreshing and inspiring to read this book from a teacher/parent perspective. To see divorced parents lovingly care for their child and each other, and a therapist consistently working to the best of her ability, was amazing, and maybe just a little unrealistic.

I also found that Bea being an only child (mostly), probably helped the situation, as the adults in her life were fully present to help her cope and thrive. Again, that aspect was a little unrealistic - her parents really were near perfect in all of their responses and decisions made on Bea’s behalf, but I was okay with it. I looked at the story as a beautiful model as how all of us adults, divorced or going through any difficult time, should strive to live, and how we can lead by example, and also better help the children in our lives. The author did include some characters that did not respond well to things or behave kindly, and that helped round things out.

This book covers topics of divorce, LGBTQ+ parents, blended families, anxiety, grief, guilt, forgiveness, and friendship. Thank you to the author, publisher, and Netgalley for providing me with an ARC of this book. All opinions are my own.

I love the story and the characters in this book! It's such an emotionally honest portrayal of Bea and all that she's feeling and going through at this period in her life. I also love thiat it brings up some difficult issues and doesn't shy away from getting to the heart of them. The one thing that didn't quite work for me was how it jumped around in time and from story to story. I would have preferred a more cohesive and linear timeline, but that didn't take away from the emotional impact of the story. Thanks to Netgalley and Wendy Lamb books for the advanced digital copy!

10-year-old Bea brings us into her world as she shares the story of her parents' divorce when she was eight. The title of the book, The List of Things That Will Not Change, is based upon a list her parents began for her in a notebook before telling Bea about the divorce. The list is meant to reassure Bea that she is still loved, and that her parents will never live far apart from each other. Bea seems to adjust remarkably well to this, and her parents also make sure she sees a counselor on a regular basis to talk about her feelings. As Bea shares her conflicting emotions about many issues, one thing remains clear: She is loved. She is loved by her dad's boyfriend, Jesse, and loved by her friends, as well as her extended family. Even when there are rough patches, there is forgiveness. When Bea's dad and Jesse announce their engagement, Bea is genuinely happy for them, and thrilled to be getting a sister, Jesse's daughter. This book is about relationships, friendships, being honest, making mistakes and being gracious. This sensitive and humorous book would be an excellent addition to any elementary fiction collection.

Bea can't wait for her dad to marry his boyfriend Jesse because it means she'll have a new sister, Jesse's daughter Sonia. But first she has to come to terms with the realization that Sonia may not be as excited to have a new family as Bea is and also to face a secret from the past summer. The story is a fast, breezy read about family and will resonate with children whose parents have been divorced. The characters are all three-dimensional and believable, although Stead does tell more than show us that Sonia is homesick when she visits before the wedding. The plot twist at the end about Bea's summer is unexpected but reads naturally and helps tie the story together. Bound to be a bestseller simply for its Newbery-winning author, although the normalization of gay marriage will cause concern and pushback among some parents and readers. Ages 8-12.

Thanks to Netgalley and Random House Childrens Wally Lamb Books for the free copy in exchange for an honest review.

The List of Things That Will Not Change by Rebecca Stead is a wonderful story about love that oddly enough starts with a divorce. The story is narrated by a young girl Bea. She tells the story of how her parents got divorced because her father is gay. The story centers around how Bea copes with learning to live in two households, her parents amicable divorce, her counseling sessions with Miriam, and finally her Dad’s finding a new love, Jesse, and marrying him.

What makes this story shine is Bea. We see her perspective from age 7 to 13. The purity and innocence of her voice, how she deals with a really difficult point in her life, and how she learns to thrive is just a beautiful story. Bea’s life is by no means perfect, but her sense of optimism and love of those around her is something special.

I like the author’s emphasis on counseling in this book. Bea’s sessions with Miriam I think help ground Bea and help her cope with uncertainty and often confusing times in her life.

I think another reason I loved this book is because it is just beautifully written. Rebecca Stead’s use of descriptive language brings a lyrical quality to the text and yet she keeps it simple and appropriate to the middle grade level.

Long story short this is a beautiful novel of growth and optimism that I really enjoyed a lot.

This book releases April 7, 2020.

Twelve-year-old Bea shares life from her perspective as she navigates the new family dynamics of her father's upcoming marriage to another man; and the excitement that this new relationship will bring her a new sister that's her own age. As the family prepares for the wedding, Bea visits with a therapist and utilizes many of the techniques she's been taught to cope with everyday life. Bea's voice throughout the story is authentic to a middle grader. So many topics are navigated like eczema, same sex marriage, divorce, therapy, school frustrations, acceptance, and homophobia. Stead, again, provides a "place" where students with similar difficulties can relate and feel at home. Recommended for grades 5 and up.

Some of the list of things that will not change include; Mom loves you more than anything, Dad loves you more than anything and we are still a family, but in a different way. These are some of the things that Bea is thinking about as her parents go through a divorce.

This middle grade novel has all of the heart that we have come to expect of a Rebecca Stead story. The characters are well developed and believable. The story will appeal to younger readers and many adults. And what I particularly liked about it was that it wasn't all gloom and doom or sunshine and kittens. It was a very real look at what happens with family dynamics after divorce. Readers should know that the parents split up because Dad is gay.

I loved this story of Bea and her family. I found myself wanting to spend more time with them days after I had read the last page! This is definitely going into my collection, and I can't wait to share it with my students!

This book tells the story of Bea whose life is changing due to her parents getting divorced and her dad remarrying a man. It goes back and forth through time as Bea shares stories about herself and how things got to where they are now.

I really enjoy when middle-grade books feature a character that acts their age and in which you can see their growth as they mature and encounter different obstacles. This was something that I felt was captured well in this book, I think it was great to see how Bea changed over time and how she recalled a lot of the big events in her life.

Something else that I enjoyed in this book was the way that emotions were captured and handled. I enjoyed the moments that Bea has with her therapist, Miriam, as it gives a great way to handle certain emotions and I think it begins to normalize therapy for those who are reading this. I like that this book addresses mental health and in a way, it addresses anxiety and normalizes worrying to a certain extent.

Something else that I really enjoyed was the way Mission not accepting his brother due to his sexuality was handled. I think the homophobia in this book was handled well and it was appropriate for the ages it is written for. It was written in a way that is realistic but also in a way that shows compassion and how you will have people who support you and those are the ones who matter.

I think this is a great book for grades 3-7 in which children may be facing difficult feelings and challenges in their life. It's nice to see that nothing in this book seems trivial and the therapist never dismisses Bea's feelings.

Thanks to Netgalley and Random House for the advance Kindle copy of this book. All opinions are my own.
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⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5 for this 4.7.20 release. When Bea’s parents sat her down and announced that they were divorcing, they gave her a notebook. In it, they started a List Of Things That Will Not Change. This story, told by jumping back and forth over a couple years, highlights the changes and constants in her life. One of the highlights for me was Bea’s sessions with Miriam, her therapist. The advice given for managing her impulsive feelings and even just the fact that she attends therapy sessions will resonate with readers and I think go a long way to normalize mental health struggles. Given Bea’s age, I would recommend this book for upper elementary and young middle school readers. Grades 3-6 are the sweet spots for this one.

The List of Things That Will Not Change by Rebecca Stead is a middle-grade novel about Bea who is navigating life after her parent's divorce. One of the ways she works through this is the lists in her notebook. In these lists, she focuses on that even though her life is changing, there are some aspects that are unchangeable to document. Much of what Bea is navigating is changing relationships. Her dad is getting remarried, and Bea is excited that his fiance Jesse will have a new role in her life and also that he has a daughter. Bea has always wanted a sister. However, as you can imagine, this doesn't go exactly as Bea imagines. Bea also decides she's going to work through some other family situations, and that creates another interesting layer to this one. The piece I most appreciated about this story is Bea has a therapist, Miriam, she regularly sees. I liked the normalization of therapy to navigate changing family dynamics. This was a quick read, yet it also packed so many feels into the pages. Thanks to Wendy Lamb Books for the early look at this April 2020 release.

Bea's life changed suddenly when her parents sat her down to let her know they were getting divorced. They gave her a notebook to write a list and it was about all the things that would not change in her life. Her parents still loving her being the most important.

I really liked how the author told this story. Bea is such an adorable girl and I felt the story was authentic and real. I loved the characters. I loved how well we got to see how Bea saw her life. Her voice was perfect. I have kids around her age and I could see them having the same emotions. This book touches on divorce, LGBT parents, step-families, intolerance, but most importantly, love.

Thank you NetGalley and Wendy Lamb Books for an ARC for my honest opinion.

This was the first book I have read by Rebecca Stead, and I completely understand why she is a Newbery Award winning author. This heartfelt story focuses on Bea, a child of divorced parents, and a gay father. This story went incredibly deep into the heart of what it feels like to be a school aged kid, and beautifully portrayed all the very real anxieties and feelings that can be so hard to process at that age. I absolutely loved this book.

***Thanks to NetGalley for providing me a complimentary copy of THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NOT CHANGE by Rebecca Stead in exchange for my honest review.***

4.5 STARS

Since her parents divorce four years ago, Bea keeps THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NOT CHANGE to help keep her anxiety in check. She writes things like her parents will still love her on the list. Bea is thrilled when her dad announces his engagement to his boyfriend Jesse, and even happier to lead she’s getting a stepsister who loves clear across the country. Bea knows she and her same age sister Sonia will be share secrets and whisper to each other at night, just like the sisters she’s seen in tv. Everything is going to be perfect. Except it’s not.

Bea is a delightfully imperfect twelve-year-old, though her naïveté at times makes her seem younger making THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NOT CHANGE idea for younger middle grade readers.

Rebecca Stead gave Bea a believable, engaging voice. Young Bea sees a therapist to help her deal with anxiety. Her parents support Bea and have a healthy, sometimes too perfect divorce. Bea has a lot of typical tween worries as she struggles to find her place in her family and in the world.

THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NOT CHANGE would have been a five-star read except for an over-the-too homophobic incident at the wedding that seemed artificially placed for drama near the end of the book. Had a similar event happened earlier and felt more organic to the story, I would never mentioned it. At the 93% point of the book, it didn’t make sense which is the reason in rated down instead of up.

THE LIST OF THINGS THAT WILL NOT CHANGE is a great addition for libraries, classrooms and all readers, especially those looking for LGBT families.

I received this ARC from the publisher, Penguin Random House, in exchange for a fair and honest review.

The List of Things That Will Not Change is a beautifully written book about a young girl named Beatrice (Bea for short). When Bea was eight years old, her parents called a family meeting. They explained that they were getting a divorce and that Bea would have two houses, her mom's and her dad's, and that she would spend time equally at each. They gave her a notebook that already had the start of a list, a list of things that would never change. Throughout the next two years, Bea would keep adding to the list.

The reason for her parent's divorce was that her dad is gay. He met his partner Jesse and fell in love. When Bea was 10, they sat her down for another family meeting. They were getting married and she was going to have a (step)sister.

Throughout the story, Bea makes the mistakes that we would expect of a child, and some a little unexpected. She tries to do the right thing which is sometimes the wrong thing. All in all she seems to be a well adjusted child who is very accepting of her life. When she overhears the plans for the invitations and that Jesse's brother, Mission, won't be coming due to his feelings towards Jesse's lifestyle choices, she takes matters into her own hands and sends Mission an invitation. It comes to a head at the wedding.

I love this story. I love that Bea seems to want nothing more than to have everyone be loving and accepting. She wants everyone around her to be happy. Although she retaliates against those who she feels have offended her and/or her parents. With there being more and more families with same sex parents, children need to learn acceptance, and if not that, respect. In this book, Bea's friends didn't have an issue with her dad being with a man. They didn't make fun of her or isolate her. That is exactly as it should be. With so much hate in this world, it was nice to read a book teaching children that just because a situation is different from theirs, doesn't mean it's bad.

Some parents may not want their children to read this book because of the fact that there are things/relationships that they don't approve of but I, for one, will be reading it to my older grandchildren.

I read this book in a matter of an hour. It made me laugh and it made me cry. I highly recommend it as a read for any age above the age of 10 (mostly for comprehension reasons).

Hopeful, heartfelt, and funny. Stead's representation of preteen anxiety in the face of (what feels like) earth-shattering change is spot-on. And I love how Bea's parents continue to love and care for each other and their daughter after divorce.

I will not offer my review online. This is a well-written book that legitimizes a lifestyle with which I do not agree (which is the author's right) while demonizing the people who do not agree with it. The author takes great care to validate any emotions any character has, with the exception of Mission, who does not agree with the idea of gay marriage and has trouble accepting his brother's homosexuality. This is the one character in the book who is not presented in a sensitive manner. Clearly this book is written from a place of bias against people whose beliefs do not include the validation of homosexual relationships.