I devoured this book. As a middle-aged Gen X woman, this book hit every button and then some. The author describes many of the challenges that me and my peers deal with: how we see ourselves as mothers, women, partners, employees and how those roles have been shaped by our generation. Gen X women were brought up to think we can have it all, but missing from that warrior cry was how the heck we were supposed to do that without any social systems in place to help us out. As a result, many of us DO have the feeling that we should do it all, and many do just that; however we are burnt out and wondering what happened.

I"m the prime demographic for this book, born the same year as the author, so I'm solidly a Gen-Xer.
While this book doesn't offer a ton of solutions, it does make you feel like you're not alone. It covers topics ranging from family, society, workalike, health and mental well-being. Highly recommend it for all us stressed-out Gen X women!

I received a digital copy of "Why We Can't Sleep" for review & a thank you to NetGalley & Grove Atlantic!

Written for those of us who fall between the Baby Boomers & the Millennials. I don't feel that I need to re-write the book, as the synopsis does just fine I am putting this book on my "to be read again" list, as I feel it deserves a bit of time and to be read slowly. A very easy read, with facts along with personal stories. The beginning of the book can bring you down a bit, listing off the sad/emotional events that have happened to any of us who were born/grew up in the 70-80's (9/11 anyone?) There are funny reminders of how simple life was when we were growing up as well. The book has a subtle shift, and at the end, I found myself more hopeful/understanding to where the author was going with all of it. Well written and thank you to Ada Calhoun.

Gentastic

Gen X’er’s are a unique lot. Known as the “Jan Brady of generations”, the perpetual generational middle child sandwiched between the bold Boomers and Millennials…aka the kids we babysat for. We stand with one foot firmly rooted in the pre-internet, pre-tech age and one in the present age of selfie-explosion and social-media-presence-as-a-resume-requirement. Our 360 degree view of the world creates a set of original challenges that we are apparently best suited for in terms of our doggedness and our impeccable work ethic which simply no longer exists in our present work smarter, not harder world. We’re already well aware there's no free lunch.
We lack a sense of entitlement. Perhaps we should have a little more of that. We are also the smallest, most financially strapped generation, virtually non-existent amongst Boomers who cannot or will not retire and Millennials who seem to win more jobs based on ageism in the workplace, those pesky and persistent biases that everyone likes to deny exists. Trust me, it does and it’s like a glass of ice-water thrown directly into the face, even when it occurs online which is where a fair amount of it plays out. Yet, pay close attention to the employer who oversees large swatches of farmland who loves hiring Gen X’ers and goes out of her way to pay them well and keep them because of their work ethic. We need more of her.
Calhoun approaches our demographic from a generational lens with an impressive amount of research backing up the bigger picture which is our magnificence in being the last generation to be raised in the old-school manner of manners, etiquette, work ethic, integrity, and the belief that our word matters.
The youngest Boomers and oldest Millennials will be able to relate too much of what Calhoun speaks of, an array of topics covering parenthood, caring for aging parents, ageism in all forms, living through multiple recessions and counting, and panic-inducing financial concerns. But make no mistake, this book is a tribute to those of us born between the years 1965 to 1980.
Much of what Calhoun writes could easily be construed as depressing but I invite you to consider that the overall tone is one of hopeful optimism. If you subscribe ala Louise Hay style that we choose the time unto which we are born, then Calhoun’s research backed assertions that Gen Xer’s are gritty and resilient in a way no other generation can claim, might feel inspiring and uplifting instead of depressing and demoralizing. Besides, according to some hard research we are the generation that does not quit. Pretty impressive for the “wrong time, wrong place generation.

BRB Rating: Read It.

I was amazed at the amount of research involved in Ada Calhoun's Why We Can't Sleep. Her thoughtful analysis of the unique problems facing Gen X women was eye opening. I found the entire book was completely relatable. I've recommended it to all my 40something friends.

Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun tackles the questions that keep us awake at night. She addresses the challenges and issues that many women face during middle age from an empathetic and scholarly perspective that is both enjoyable and educational for the casual reader. According to Calhoun, the burden of choice that women now face is both liberating and deeply troubling. We are not alone when we  look back on our lives and wonder: "Did I marry the right person?" "Did I choose the right career?" "Should I have had children?"  "Should I have went back to school?" 

I'm getting older (aren't we all?) and I fall into that strange generation that is "not quite" Gen X and "not quite" millennial. Unlike many millenials, I remember the sound of dial up internet and I didn't learn to use a smart phone until I was in grad school. However, unlike Generation X, I don't remember the Cold War and I was only a year old when the Berlin Wall fell. While this book technically focuses on Gen X women, I still found a great deal I could relate to as an "elder millenial." 

Sometimes, I feel like a stranger in a strange land. it seems so odd to me that there is an entire generation of people, some of them of voting age, who can't remember the attacks of September 11th. To those people, the tragic events of that day seem as distant as the  attacks on Pearl Harbor seem to me- something we have only heard about in stories, history books, and documentaries. 

I look around and wonder, "How did we get here?" According to Calhoun, such existential questions are common ones for women approaching middle age. While men have midlife crises that involve sports cars and large outward signs of struggle, women tend to quietly agonize over their life choices. I was glad to know that I was not alone with my thoughts and concerns. 

Calhoun's book is filled with statistics and interviews. Although I became a bit bogged down with all the numbers, I was comforted by the book's enduring message of the strength of women. As each year brings me closer to midlife, I am glad to know that I am not alone with my existential angst.

I recommend this book for any other woman (especially in the Gen X generation) who finds herself lying awake at night struggling with questions related to aging and self worth. Why We Can't Sleep is an affirmation to women of all ages- young, middle-aged, and advanced and years- that our struggles are real. But nevertheless, we are resilient. 

Note: I received a free copy of this book from Net Galley in exchange for an honest review. My thoughts and options are my own.

I am a millennial, and not yet middle aged. While this book didn’t entirely apply to me I still enjoyed learning about the mindset and shared experiences of the generation before mine. Getting this insight is something that I think can help future generations so they don’t fall into the same hardships and cultivates understanding and compassion. I appreciate the strength of all women and this was a book that really opened my eyes to what we all go through at different times in our lives. I know it may change slightly for each generation in some aspects, but overall we all share many of the same worries. I liked it!

I am a boomer but wanted to read the book to learn what my kids would be facing. I think the book was informative, well written and a book that will be used over and over. I think it will give so many peace of mind to know they aren't alone.
I received an ARC from NetGalley and am buying it for my kids when it is published. I had a go-to book that I used over and over and I think this is a book that they will read if only to know they aren't alone. Most if not all of their generation is facing the same things.

From the title of this book, you might think it's about sleep, but really the focus is more on what are the biggest worries of the Generation X. The author is only a year older than me so being in the same cohort, it was reassuring to read that I am not alone in my anxiety. Financial concerns make up a large part of what keeps us up at night. An interesting read.

This book was extremely well written and informative. My only issue with this book was that it is for and about generation x women , and personally I enjoy books o=for a broader topic.

This was a pretty good book! I enjoyed reading my ARC, and it was a fast read and easy to understand and great characters! Thank you for the opportunity to enjoy this new author and I highly recommend this to everyone.

It was a fair read. Informative somewhat. Just stats, and hard work I do give credit for. Just not one I could get into.

Thanks, NetGalley for the advance copy to review.

Reading Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun felt like I was reading a biography of my own life. The main premise of the book examines that current life trajectories of women from Generation X (born 1965-1980). Women in Generation X are the first to deal with new expectations, due to the great strides achieved by women of earlier generations. For example, the ability to work outside the home and have children was normalized, but for Gen X women the expectation is that we WILL do both. As Calhoun so perfectly states, "The belief that girls could do anything morphed into a directive that they must do everything." This book examines the ever-increasing demands that Gen X women are facing and delves into these various areas of responsibility (children, aging parents, financial demands, career aspirations, and physical changes). This book will highlight many of the things you fear, and some you didn't even realize, but it will also reassure you that you are not crazy and you are not alone!

This book has a very specific audience that isn’t really made clear in the title or subtitle. I picked it up because it purported to speak to women in midlife. I just turned seventy. My Boomer friends and I consider ourselves middle aged, not old. We have no reason to believe we won’t live well past a hundred given advances in medicine and medical technology. Middle age should be thought of as the middle of ones adult life, I think, not the middle of all one’s years. At any rate, as soon as I began to read, I realized that this book was not for me. Never intended for me. I am sorry that Gen X has so many problems,, but in all honesty, I had to put this book down. It’s not that I’m not interested in the cohorts below mine. It’s that I found the book too depressing. Perhaps women in the Gen X cohort will love the acknowledgment and it will speak to their loneliness. But I have two suggestions: put “Gen X” somewhere on the front cover; and change the cover. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but frankly I found the pink blob uninspiring. It did nothing to help me know what the book was about. Given all of that, I do thank you most sincerely for giving me the chance to examine this book and “try it in for size.” Good luck. I do hope it’s a big hit for you.

** Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with the digital copy of this book in exchange for my honest review **
Como alguien que ha tenido dificultades con el sueño, ya el titulo me llamo la atención, pero el libro trata de mas que eso. Es un libro que trata sobre cómo es el estilo de vida de la mujer actual. Me encanto que el punto de vista sea femenino. Ademas tiene un punto de vista que es generacionalmente mas cercano, lo cual lo hizo más interesante para mí. La lectura es amena y fácil. Lo recomiendo.

At first glance I thought this book was about not being able to sleep, but on closer inspection I realised it was about much more. Specifically this book is aimed at middle aged American women and most of the example and surveys are more relevant to this demographic. However there are lots of parts that are universal and apply to women everywhere (especially Generation X born 1964 - 1984). It has some really interesting sections in and lots of good information on peri and full menopause stages of life. Many will relate to what is written and will realise that women everywhere have lots in common. An easy read that is well written and very relevant to women today.

Calhoun's book explores more than just insomnia -- she breaks down the unique challenges faced by women as they arrive on the doorstep of middle age in today's world. As she explores the anxieties and fears that her interview and research subjects face, she finds only one way out: telling ourselves a new story about what is valuable and important in life. It's a message we can all find useful, whether we're a part of Gen X or not.

A book written by a middle class gen x women for others in that demographic. As a book that helps readers to feel a sisterhood in the middle age experience, this book does a good job. But, otherwise didn’t offer more.

Why We Can't Sleep by Ada Calhoun is a powerful look at the unique struggles middle-aged women are facing in today's society. While I have recently read a few books that look at the many challenges women face, this book is specifically geared from a generational lens.

Calhoun speaks from and to Generation X which is classified as the group in between the "Boomer" and "Millenial" generations...specifically people born between 1964-1980. Even if you are born after this time, this book and its concepts are relatable for many, and I appreciated that she acknowledged and addressed this.

Calhoun looks into the topics that are keeping many women awake at night, from housing and financial data to the pulls of home and family life. Her writing is backed up with research but is readable and enjoyable to read which I found the perfect balance as a reader. I enjoyed that she shared the challenges but also had advice and perspective about how to deal with these issues. Highly recommend!

Thank you to NetGalley and Grove Atlantic for an advanced copy of this book.