Cover Image: Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies

Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies

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BUY YOURSELF THE F*CKING LILIES by Tara Schuster was incredibly funny, amazingly insightful, yet very sad at the same time. Wow, what a ride she had! Talk about pulling yourself up by the bootstraps. Although at my advanced age I am beyond the need for her right-on advice I still admire her spirit and her ability to overcome such a lack of parenting. I highly recommend this book as a gift to anyone you know who makes excuses for not growing up and taking charge of their lives.

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This book reads like a personal blog. It was not written to my tastes and some of the narratives felt made-up or overdramatized.

I felt that the author tried really hard to make her parents seem like a villain. For example, as a five-year-old, she witnessed her parents argue over which R-rated movie to take the children to. It seemed more than a little far-fetched and even if the authors parents did argue a lot and create some tense situations, labeling it as trauma or abuse is too hard for me wrap my head around.

I wouldn't recommend this book.

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This book is the author's memoir. Through her life experiences, she has learned some valuable lessons that she passes onto readers. While I feel the author's personal experiences gave her an expertise in the subjrect. It would have given her more credibility to include the reference to research to support ideas/claims.

This was an honest book. Told in a conversational tone, there were many ideas to think about: how you respond, accepting things, writing how you react to mention a few.

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This book fits into two categories in the non-fiction/self help realm. One, there are at least ten books, currently in book stores, with the F word in the title. Anyone who knows me knows that I am from New Jersey, and I have the potty mouth to prove it, but honestly I’m over this “shock me with the vulgarity” trend in self help. There is also a trend of comedians writing books. For example, Tina Fey wrote a best selling book about her rise to fame. Amy Poehler wrote an almost identical book, but did it way better than Tina Fey. Now we have Tara Schuster, Vice President of Talent and Development at Comedy Central, who wrote a book that pales in comparison to the aforementioned books.

I see where Tara was going with this book. Take time to smell the roses, prioritize self care, listen to your intuition... but honestly, most of her advice only suits a single woman with an abundance of time and money. As a wife, mother and business owner, most of her advice would be impossible for me to follow unless I want to prioritize journal writing over keeping my children alive. Also, as someone who uses medical marijuana to manage PTSD, my hatred for her chapter on giving up weed and replacing it with running, burns hotter than the fire of one thousand suns.

As a Women’s Health Therapist (my day job), I am proud of Tara for figuring out her path to happiness after a traumatic childhood. I just think this book could have been written as more of a story of her journey, rather than a step by step “must follow these rules to be healthy” self help book. Although the book is full of some very useful tips and tricks to improve mental and physical well-being, it comes off as a bit pious and holier than thou, which is off putting.

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Okay this one is really a self-help book, not a memoir. I guess I misunderstood the blurb, because I expected more of the latter and less of the former. I don't read self-help books as a rule, they are just not for me. As a result I quickly lost interest in this one and the author's voice just wasn't enough to carry me through...

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This book falls into the category of required reading for all. Rarely if ever have I read a self help book which combines this much honesty and applicable, effective advice.
I now have a name for that “voice” - frenemy. It may not be lilies I purchase or coffees but I won’t feel guilty about the occasional fab restaurant or trainer sesh. By the time you finish reading, you will feel as if you’ve made a new friend in Tara Schuster. And no surprise, this will be THE grad, hostess, bday, new mommy, you name the occasion gift as anyone who reads Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies is better for it. I’m so thankful this crossed my desk & moved straight to my nightstand. Thank you Tara Schuster for your generous bravery in writing this and may we have more please?

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Buy Yourself the F*cking Lilies hit so close to home for me. I had a really similar childhood that I'm still struggling to get past. I can't wait to try out some of the techniques outlined in the book to live a happier life! I'm so glad I had the opportunity to read this book, it's exactly what I needed.

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The book wasn’t what I was expecting, so I didn’t finish it. I think people looking for self-help will enjoy it.

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I just could not get into this book and the author just did not "grab me" as a reader. I read the first few chapters but just could not keep going. The language used was rather basic and just did not lead me to feel compelled to read further. Thank you to NetGalley and to Random House Publishing for the review copy!

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This is essentially a self-help book by way of memoir. There’s a lot of good stuff in here. It’s always helpful to have a reminder to stop the negative thoughts about yourself—like that you’re a failure because you don’t have a boyfriend/the job you want/you aren’t working out or eating well enough and so on. For some of us, giving ourselves pep talks is not our natural state, but Tara reminds us: If your friend were in a similar situation, would you talk to her that way?

It’s also good to remember to live in an attitude of gratitude for what you do have instead of always wanting what you don’t have.

Taking care of yourself through eating well, not muting our lives with drugs including alcohol, getting enough sleep, and nurturing relationships, makes for a much happier life.

But here’s what endlessly distracted me from what good stuff is in here: Tara seems to think she’s writing in the language of Tweets or something. I’m pretty sure she took a lot of this from her own journals, and in my journaling, I also use shorthand because ideally, I’m the only one who is ever going to read those pages. Maybe she was trying to seem overly conversational, but she was only having conversations with other Millennials, because those of us who are Gen X or older LEARNED TO WRITE IN COMPLETE SENTENCES BECAUSE THIS IS A BOOK.

I got an advance copy from NetGalley, so the first couple times I ran across the lowercase “rn,” I thought it was some kind of typo, which happens a lot in advanced reader copies. The third time, from the context, I realized she was trying to say “right now,” and apparently didn’t have the time or space to be clear about this. I’m on social media so I know many shorthand terms, but sometimes, just bothering to write things out makes for actual clear writing, which is a super handy thing when it comes to communicating in written form.

I identified with a lot of what Tara had to say. The tumultuous childhood she had was nuts. The most nutty thing were the unimaginably cruel voice mails her estranged mother would leave her after her parents separated and the mother took the younger sister, leaving Tara with her Dad. So, even though I’ve had ups and downs with my own mom, it made me appreciate that we do have a good, if not always easy, relationship.

Thanks to NetGalley for the opportunity to review this book, which RELEASES FEBRUARY 18, 2020.

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This is quite funny. Tara is very candid and smart. I'm a little old this probably, as younger folk will likely be the target. But it's still entertaining and potentially helpful (there's advice, etc). As an aside I'm not excited about the trend of 4 letter words in titles (I'm not a prude -- it's just a silly way to get attention), but that's a different matter... Recommended.

I really appreciate the NetGalley advanced copy for review!!

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First of all- GREAT COVER! I really like in her intro she says "In all things, I let truth, vulnerability, and kindness guide me." That was a great start for me. Schuster is definitely hilarious and I think everyone can identify with at least one part of her hilarious story. I definitely found myself saying "yep I've done that" or "that was me" and "me too". I will be recommending this to everyone I know. Thank you for the opportunity to read and review this book.

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Loved it!! It’s an honest book on mental health told by a real person. She is so open and honest in her journey that you love to take it with her.

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open honest Inspiring hilarious guide to life.Howtoo treat yourself well how to be strong confident.I will be gifting friends with this book.#netgalley#randomhouse
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I love this title. I cannot wait for it to be released to purchase it for friends. It was so validating to read a "self-help" book written by a real person with faults and flaws and vices. It was a wonderful wake-up call and left me encouraged to be better to myself.

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