Cover Image: Finding Balance

Finding Balance

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Thank you so much to net galley for sending me a copy of this book. I was thinking I was going to absolutely love this book but I ended up not really enjoying it as much. I felt like the characters were very flat

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Jase Ellison doesn’t remember having acute lymphocytic leukemia when he was three years old. His cancer diagnosis only enters his mind twice a year. Once at his yearly checkup at the oncology clinic and one when he attends Camp Chemo in the summer. No one in his “real” life knows about his past, especially his friends at Atlanta West Prep.

Mari Manos has never been able to hide her cancer survivorship. She wakes every morning, grabs her pink forearm clip crutches, and starts her day. Mari loves Camp Chemo—where she’s developed a healthy crush on fellow camper Jase. At Camp, she knows that she’ll never get “the look” or have to explain her amputation to anyone.

Jase wants to move on, to never reveal his past. But when Mari transfers to his school, he knows she could blow his cover. That’s the last thing he wants, but he also cannot ignore his attraction to her. Mari wants to be looked at like a girl, a person, and not only known for her disability. But how do you move on from cancer when the world won’t let you?


What a story. Reading this really hit home for me in more ways than one. Having a invisible disability is hard and you don’t want to explain to everyone. Why you can’t breathe. I too have cardiomyopathy and it sucks!! I felt so bad for Jase. However he was a complete asshole and he did not deserved Mari’s love, affection or protection. Great story.

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What a beautiful and authentic story! I truly enjoyed reading this encouraging, brave story of Mari and Jase, two teens navigating school, cancer, and each other. There are so many things to love here, especially the main characters, with their own dreams, hopes, and struggles. I definitely liked Mari’s voice over Jase’s, but that’s mainly because of his behavior in the way he treated her in school in the beginning. However, this story includes acceptance and forgiveness and the journey to arrive there.

Thank you to the author for giving so much of herself through these words. One thing to note, you don’t have to read “Brave Enough” in order to read “Finding Balance” – but you should because both books are terrific!

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This addresses important issues for young people living with serious health conditions in a way that is engaging for the most part. It captures the frustrations and dilemmas of living with seen and unseen disability and offers a valuable insight into challenges and dilemmas faced by those who have overcome the battle with cancer and go on to live with the outcomes. The main characters provide an interesting duality as their experiences, while grounded in a similar foundation, differ widely.

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The start of the book has Mari and Jase at camp but it is too quick. Their camp relationship is rushed and I didn't really get a feel for it. I loved Mari and her friends and family. How they each dealt with her challenges was very heartfelt. Her humor and resilience were inspiring. Even learned a little about prosthesis options. Jase or Jason on the other hand I could forgive once for his actions but to continue them even after all his promises, it was just too much. I couldn't like him or want him to be with Mari. So the 4 star rating is all for Mari - she earned it.

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Thanks to Flux for providing a digital arc of Finding Balance VIA netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

I'm normally additionally critical of sicfic because a combination of illnesses being used in the place of character traits and inaccurate, glamorized depictions of illnesses tend to scare me off but I was less concerned about Finding Balance providing an inaccurate portrayal of cancer due to the author's own medical history.

I think it was really interesting to attempt to analyse how different people deal with and share their cancer journeys, but I just couldn't get into this book. Cancer is real and contemporary stories about cancer should feel real and this just didn't, which I found boggling considering the fact that it was based off of real experiences. I think my main issues were

1) The MC's personality was literally just having cancer and being bad at chem
2) The hyperbolic response to that character's cancer.

On the first point, I counted twice where the book tells characters that they're 'more than their diagnosis' but the message never really stuck because Mari and Jase aren't. Jase swims and Mari like books in general (one of my pet peeves if you have a bookish character give me a genre they read so it actually tells me something about them. Otherwise it's like saying "i watch TV" and calling that a personality trait) but they feel more like representations of people than actual people which works in some cases, but not when you're telling a love story.

On the second, I understand people can react poorly to things they see as 'different'. Sure, I'll even buy that some teenagers are cruel enough to bully people because they're amputees. But when you have 16 year old, AP class taking characters making comments about how they genuinely believe that cancer's contagious or that since Mari has one leg her brother must also be an amputee, it doesn't come off as rude or ignorant, it comes off as comically unbelievable and makes it hard to buy into a narrative.

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4/5 ⭐️ to Finding Balance by Kati Garner

Thank you to NetGalley, North Star Editions, and Flux books for early access to the ebook!

Finding Balance is the prequel to Brave Enough, and follows Mari and Jase as our two MCs. As I actually read this book before Brave Enough, it was my first experience reading Kati Garner’s writing. There is own-voices rep for disability and cancer, of which I appreciated the Author’s perspective. She writes with so much feeling and heart, drawing us into these two character’s stories. The back-and-forth narration between Mari and Jase really worked for me, and I thought it brought a more complete perspective to the story as a whole, but also drew me in as the reader being able to connect with these two.

Mari and Jase couldn’t be more different, even in their experiences with cancer, but their worlds start intersecting after they meet at Camp Chemo. He barely remembers receiving his treatments at age 3, while Mari is still reeling from a total amputation of her leg following a life-threatening infection. Mari ends up moving to Jace’s school, which puts strain on whatever relationship they may have developed at Camp. This relationship between Mari and Jase provides both entertainment and tension to the story, and it was enjoyable how it changed and developed as the book progressed!

There were two things that really moved me throughout the book - the support our characters have from their family and friends (and eventually from each other), and how the experience of childhood cancer affects a person. I personally haven’t known a child or teen who has battled cancer, but this opened my eyes to what these people go through and how each experience is both unique and universal. I appreciated the frank dialogue surrounding disability, use of assistive devices, ableism, and the discrimination that happens to people living with chronic conditions. What really makes this book important and shines is how this is woven into the story as a whole, making it feel real, and not just an “agenda”.

Thank you, Kati Gardner, for writing a poignant, heartfelt YA Contemporary that I know will touch many people! I would definitely recommend picking up these read when it hits shelves Sept 2020!

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Really enjoyed reading an #ownvoices disability book! Kati Gardner is able to give this book a level of authenticity that an able-bodied author very likely couldn't have achieved - even with the best intentions, copious amounts of research and authenticity readers.

I love that the characters in Finding Balance were complex and definitely flawed - yet I never didn't care about Mari and Jase. I hurt when they hurt, swooned when they swooned and occasionally wanted to smack them (especially Jase but occasionally Mari too!).

This is an engrossing read that takes a deep dive into a specific experience many readers likely won't have had themselves while also offering a teen romance/fish-outta-water-at-a-new-school story that is probably pretty darn relatable to a wide array of teens.

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As a disabled person, I am hungry for #ownvoices disability rep. Both as a reader and as a writer. There aren’t words adequate enough to express my gratitude to Kati for doing this. I am so incredibly proud of her.

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I really enjoyed this book! I read Gardner's debut and loved it, so I went into this expecting the same thrilling rush of emotions the first book gave me. Gardner did not disappoint! I really loved Jase and Mari and I loved the deeply personal touches the author wove throughout the book. I read the entire book in one sitting and it definitely gave me the feels! Highly recommend!

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Thank you Netgalley and Flux for the copy in exchange for an honest review.

Finding Balance was an empowering, inspiring, realistic and cute YA contemporary romance. The story follows Mari, a sixteen-year-old who had cancer and is also an amputee, due to an infection. Along with Jase, who is a fellow cancer survivor. They met at Camp Chemo, a summer camp for who have or are going through chemotherapy.

Although everything changes when Mari moves to the school Jase attends. The friendship--and flirtationship--they once had has completely disappeared when she sees him, because Jase hasn't told anyone at school about his cancer, and fears that with Mari being there, the secret will be revealed.

A few things I really enjoyed about this book:
-The character development was great! To make it even better, it was done in such a realistic way.
-The story-telling. Kati Gardner is a great writer, and I will definitely read more of her books.
-Body positivity! Such an important thing to read, especially in YA. Mari was full of it, and I loved that.
-The romance. Mari and Jase are the kind of couple you root for.

Overall, this is a great YA read, and I highly recommend it.

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I'm starting this review by saying how much this story is needed. We often read stories about kids having cancer, or life threatening illnesses and how their life is affected by that, and that is okay those books are awesome representation.

But what happens to those  who fought the battle, won and are left with physical or long lasting effects because of it?

Finding Balance is all about that.

I don't know much about cancer or recovery of the disease  so just for that matter I'm just focusing on Mari and Jase's story and how it all developed between them.

These two teenagers had cancer, made a full recovery and attend Camp Chemo.

Camp Chemo is for kids to be among kids who personally know how it is to recover from such a disease and sort of learn to move on together and have a safe space to just be kids/teenagers who suffered a great deal and need someone to understand what it is to be or have been in that situation.

Mari and Jase met in said camp. Jase had leukemia when he was a little kid and recover before the age of ten.

Now as a teenager, the cancer chapter of his life is not as important to him or as vivid because he doesn't even remember being sick.

He knows he's was very sick, but is now okay and he likes the idea of no one except his camp friends knowing he had such a disease.

Mari on the other hand isn't as lucky as Jase. She had cancer at the age of ten and it left her with a constant reminder of what she went through. She lost her left leg. So even though she recovered from cancer, cancer left her a forever reminder of what she lived and went through.

Mari can't use a prosthesis because the amputation took most of her limb, so she uses crutches for her daily life. It is a little struggle sometimes, but she has learned to "walk again" with the crutches and she is pretty comfortable using them.

There is just one little problem... the society she lives in is not completely comfortable with her using crutches and seeing her as something else other than her disability.

When a little accident happens at her public school, the school officials try to have her use a wheelchair (something she is not comfortable doing), or be in kind of an isolated learning room (don't know how those work, I only know she would stay in one room and is kind of like homeschooling, but at school? Don't really know, but those are her only options), otherwise they really can't accommodate her "needs" anymore.

So she is transferred to a private school and that private school happens to be the same private school Jase goes to.

She and Jase are more camp friends than they are "regular" friends. They only see each other every year during camp and they might talk through text. Also, they almost kiss this last camp year, but since they are from two different social circles they don't interact much during the school year.

But that all changed when she starts going to his same high school. The minute Mari saw Jase she figured they could also be friends there and it was good to see a familiar face, but he didn't want that at all. When she approaches him during the only class they share he pretends he doesn't know her and that is when things actually start to happen.

We know from the beginning that Mari likes Jase, she has liked him for a long time, but she is not like one of those girls that will just longingly look at the guy and hope that one day he changes his mind and stops being a jerk.

She is focused on her, and yes, it might have hurt her that he was being a total jerk and asking her to keep his cancer and his camp life a secret, but she is not giving him a second thought. If he wants to keep it a secret and lie to every one of his friends and be a jerk to her so be it.

Mari has other things going for her, she is thinking of giving a new prosthetics company a shot and see if she can get a prostheses that will work for her.  She is also trying to concentrate in school so she doesn't get scholarship taken away because of her bad grades.

Obviously things can't stay that way for long, lies never last especially when the constant reminder of the truth walks the halls of your same school.

Jase needs to learn that not because he can't remember ever being sick, it means that it's not something that is part of his past and he need to learn from it and learn how it actually did shape his life.

You might think this is a book about Mari the "disabled girl," but it's more than that. It's about learning to be comfortable in your own body and not let anybody waver the faith you have in yourself. Is about not letting anything or anyone define "normal" for you, and learning to live with your past so you can move on and have a good future.

Gardner did an amazing job creating this world and characters, the challenges these two  teenagers face are not ordinary in any way and she makes it so easy to understand and relate to what the Mari and Jase are feeling. They feel and read so real is easy to picture yourself in the characters shoes.

Finding Balance is all about that, finding balance, a balance with your past, present and how your future will turn out. I completely recommend this book to anyone that enjoys real life situations, romance, drama and hopeful endings.

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This book was provided by the publisher through Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Thank you Flux and Netgalley!

Finding Balance is the second book in the Brave Enough series and tells the story of Mari and Jase. Although this is the second book in the series, it can be read as a standalone.

It’s been a while since I read the first book, Brave Enough, but I do remember enjoying the book because I learnt so much about what it means to be a survivor. I liked this book as well because I learnt so much more about being a survivor but also about the consequences of having cancer. I think there need to be more books about this topic!

Mari is a strong character because she’s an amputee and she tries to be as strong as she can when people ask her so many questions or say mean things about her missing a leg. Jase, on the other hand, doesn’t want to share his story because he doesn’t want people to say mean things to him. I kinda have a love/hate relationship with Jase but he redeemed himself at the end of the book.

Finding Balance was a good book with a beautiful message. I enjoyed reading this book and I really liked learning more about cancer, amputees and their struggles. This story is a story that I will not forget because I definitely learnt a few things and I liked the fact that this story is so personal to the author!

3.5/5*

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I'm impressed with the depth of research and heart this author has put into this story.
Mari has an unusual amputation, almost no residual limb left for a comfortable prosthetic leg, so she chose to go without, her mobility lay in her crutches and her ease with them. And while she may have been young for this type of amputation, cancer is merciless, and it was that or her life.
The story begins with her annual trip to summer camp, for kids with cancer, and she finds her relationship with Jace becoming much closer. Despite their efforts, that first kiss never happened due to the intervention of others.
Mari returns to school, and a day comes that isn't just a bad day, it's the end of life as she knows it. Due to a fight in the halls that led to her falling, and that horrid little grape that caused her second fall, the school informs her she can attend school under their terms, or not at all.
Which leads to a change in schools, to an elite private school further from her home. When she first sees Jace she is so relieved, until 'Jason' claims not to know her.
No one in his current realm knows his history, and no one, not even Mari, is going to change that.
Secrets, manipulation, bullies, cancer, prosthetics, friendships and a hint of romance are all a part of this story. And while this story felt familiar, like something I'd read before, it picked up it's own nuances and character and will definitely be a hit with readers who loved 'Fault in Our Stars' by John Green or the many books by Lurlene McDaniel.

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Another delightful story from Kai Gardner! It was wonderful to see some familiar faces from Brave Enough but also to get to know Mari and Jase and their story. Easy read, so much emotion that I could see being very relatable to people whatever their struggles in life might be. It made to cry just like the last one which I love in books because I thinks it makes them memorable!

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Finding Balance is a great book about the difference between visible and invisible disabilities, and also how it impacts your relationships. I loved how it dealt with ableism and internalized ableism. However, seeing it on-page was a struggle even though it was necessary.
Once again, a lack of communication was at the origin of most of the issues in the main couple.

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I received this Arc from the publisher and Netgalley in exchange for my honest review. Thank you for letting me review the book. I liked the premise of the book. It was a sweet story of love, forgiveness, acceptance of who you are, and health. It was predictable in some places. And I loved Mari’s siblings. I wanted more of them.

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I received a free digital copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This book is heart wrenchingly good. Gardner has a way of writing her characters that makes them super relatable. I really love anything Gardner writes, so this one was an absolute win for me.

Thank you kindly to the author, the publisher, and NetGalley for this review copy.

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There are endless cancer stories in the YA community, so many that they can all start to sound the same. What was different about this story was that not only was this all about being a survivor, but it also features a character who straight doesn't identify as being a cancer kid. Jason Ellison was only three-years-old when he had leukemia and doesn't remember much about the three years he spent with the disease. If it wasn't for his yearly check-ups and his annual week at Camp Chemo, You wouldn't even know he was a survivor. And that's exactly how he wants it to stay. Mari Manos couldn't hide her bout with cancer even if she tried, as it landed her with only one leg. However that doesn't bother her—she owns who she is. It wasn't until she transferred to Jason's school did she start to question how she dealt with her survivor plan. Because despite being great fans at camp—maybe even something more—once she sees Jason at school, he pretends not to know her.

I really enjoyed this, which was surprising because I wasn't a fan of the first book in this sort-of series. Because of that, I went into reading this companion piece with very low expectations that were definitely exceeded. I loved how confident Mari was—she took all her struggles and hardships in stride, even when she did get her feelings hurt. Despite understanding and seeing the struggle Jason was going through with owning his past, I still have a hard time with Mari accepting his apologies. He said some really nasty stuff to her, things that if it was me, I would have never accepted. I guess Mari is just a better person than I am.

ARC was provided by the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.

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This was such an awesome book! I love Mari and Jase! I do think its a nice contrast to have the POVS be from Mari, a teen who is comfortable with her disability, and Jase, who just wants to pretend he didnt have cancer. Its nice to see how they both came to term with there disabilites by the end of the book. I love the cover because it's the first time I've seen a character missing a limb and with crutches on the cover. Awesome disability rep.

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