Cover Image: Never a Girl, Always a Boy

Never a Girl, Always a Boy

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Member Reviews

I always feel strange writing reviews for memoirs. What I can say is that this book was absolutely fantastic, it touched my heart and it's a must read for everyone.

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This is a wonderful story that needs to be shared. I love that authors are willing to share their experiences and that publishers are promoting more diverse voices. Everyone has a story to tell and all should be encouraged to share.

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Even though I don't really like biographical books I just loved this story! Wordless!
I just didn't give 5 stars, because I found some parts a little confusing, having to reread them again to understand, delaying my reading rhythm.

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This book is a mandatory read for every human, doesn’t matter if you are somewhere on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum, an ally or not. He is extremely lucky and his parents and siblings have shown to be true advocates and are more supportive and understanding than anyone can ask for.

I loved this book. It's inspirational and moving and should be required reading for everyone. Jo captures a story of struggle, coming of age and love. They all have questions and doubts at some point, but don’t we all about everything?

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Given some reviews I’ve seen speaking to the fact that this may be more for parents of trans youth, but I won’t be completing this book due to potentially triggering content as a trans person. Thank you anyway for the opportunity!

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Jeremy born as Emily didn't know how to identify himself at a young age. Often getting called a "tomboy" what the only thing that made sense. He didn't like girly clothes or girly things, but didn't feel like a boy either. Struggling with his identity and sexuality took a toll on him and his family. This memoir has viewpoints from Jeremy and his family on his transgender journey.

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An interesting look into the life of a transgendered person. I really like the family aspect of this book. A must read.

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This was absolutely fascinating. I think everyone needs to read Once a Girl, Always a Boy to understand the transgender experience. I highly recommend it to everyone and have purchased a copy for my library. Thank you so much!

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Unfortunately, I was very disappointed after reading this book. I was expecting a brutally honest portrayal of this family’s experience. However, I kept feeling that many of the negative experiences Jeremy and his family had gone through had been omitted or brushed over. And while that’s completely understandable, it probably means the whole story isn’t ready to be told yet - not until every member of the family is on board and Jeremy is comfortable with it. One thing I did love about this book was the family itself. Jeremy is very fortunate to be surrounded by such love and support. I would expect that’s not the norm for most trans-gender children.

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"Something is different. I don’t want to hide anymore, even though I’m scared to say even to myself that I’m trans. I’m frozen, unable to make a decision. The thought of change is terrifying. Can I do it? Will I disappoint everyone if I do? Oh, God."

Biographies (memoirs) are one of favorite kinds of books to read but I don’t read many. It’s hard to put a rating and a review on someone else’s life. They’ve experienced these things and we’re just reading what’s on the paper. I haven’t read many books about the LGBTQIAP+ community but It’s time that I do, educate myself more, and this is where we should all start.

This book takes us through the journey of not only Jeremy but of his closest family members as he discovers who he is. It’s told through many POV’s but it’s mostly of his Mom listening to her son, educating herself, and being an advocate for the transgender community. Not everyone’s family is supportive and willing to educate themselves. I’m glad that Jeremy had a great support system, not only at home with family but with friends as he transitioned into being his true self.

Once a girl, Always a Boy is a heartfelt and important memoir. It’s an eye-opening memoir that should be read by everyone. Jeremy is brave for telling his story because not all of it was positive and it’s hard to find the right words in letting others know what you’re thinking/feeling. There is a lot of hate in this world and it needs to end. We should be supportive of one another. If you need to talk to someone, I’ve posted the phone number below.

Trans Lifeline: (Information shared from their website)
A 24/7 hotline available in the U.S. and Canada staffed by transgender people for transgender people. Trans Lifeline is primarily for transgender people in a crisis, from struggling with gender identity to thoughts of self-harm. The number is: 1-877-565-8860

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This is a memoir of a family learning and loving a transgender man as he goes from the female gender he was assigned at birth through his transition journey. It is primarily told from the perspective of his mother, but quite a bit of the book shares words from Jeremy himself, as well as his father, Jon. I loved the idea behind this book. I think it would be incredibly helpful for any family who has someone on this path to becoming who they truly are. The one downside that made it difficult for me when reading was how Jo refers to her child through the course of the book. She specifically addresses this in the preface and talks about her struggle to decide what was the right thing to do. It is decided that she will refer to Jeremy as Emily, his given birth name, and use the "she" pronoun until he actually makes the transition. I understand the logic behind this, but it created discontinuity and made it hard to bounce from one to the other. *Advance copy provided by the publisher in exchange for my honest review.

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Just. Wow. This book is so well written. I loved that only was it a memoir of the individual that went through the journey so that you could experience the thoughts and feelings - but was also a memoir of the parents, as they watched their child grow up, to when their child was an adult. Still wanting to protect, and foster their growth and development. I would highly recommend this to anyone at all. Captivating, could not put this down! I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

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I could not read this book. The formatting for this novel was atrocious and completely unreadable. I was disappointed because I was really looking forward to reading this story.

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As someone who's also trans, I related to so much of this memoir and the personal journey of identity that Jo goes on. Would recommend to fellow trans readers as well as those who want to understand more about gender identity.

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What I found incredibly interesting about Once a Girl, Always a Boy is that it shows us the journey that the whole family took rather than just the person going through their own transgender journey. The inclusion of the family perspectives was in my opinion absolutely needed, and would be especially helpful for other parents or siblings who's relatives have gender dysphoria. I don't personally know any transgender people and so some of the information in the book was completely new to me and to be honest, some of it came as a complete shock.
I was already aware of the more medical side of things such as the breast removal, hormone replacement etc but the political bills and laws that allow discrimination against transgender people were not only eye opening but frankly sickening.
I feel like the book did a great job showing the reader how gender isn't just black and white, and transgender people don't just decide immediately that they are the opposite gender, but that there are a lot of grey in between areas and the progress to gender identity can be very complex and long.
I think Once a Girl, Always a Boy is a fantastic book that helps to raise awareness of the difficulties transgender people face, not only during their gender identity process but lifelong. And I also think it would be a brilliant resource for families to read that would help them to see that other families share their worries and thoughts.

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This book is incredibly important and poignant. I appreciated the different perspectives from each family member, and it was carefully and heartwarmingly crafted. There is something so genuinely special in reading about the love Jo and her family have for Jeremy, and their unwavering support throughout his transition.

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I have to say that I felt like transgender memoirs were beginning to echo what seemed such similar stories. Most were written from the first-person POV. Recently however, one, Love Lives Here, looked into the perspective of the family of a transgender child with a transgender parent. It was written by the cisgender spouse. That book moved me. This book, written by a mother of a transgender son, was as different and a valuable POV as the aforementioned Love Lives Here. I'm a transgender woman from a generation that denied my existence and outlawed my existence. I lost everything when I finally came out; love, home, security, savings and employment. My life was scarred by epithets from loved ones and silence when support was needed. My story isn't unique, certainly not for my generation. Now, we hear primarily from a mother who went through the emergence of her son as he struggled to come to grips with his gender identity and then move cautiously through transition as a young adult. Her son’s voice is evident throughout as he moves from a young school-age girl to an early adult man. I know how difficult that transition is firsthand. Here, we get a view of how parenting eases the child through what is a life or death struggle with their identity. Recent politics further endanger the lives of trans folks and we also get insight into how hate has moved into our government again. This was a good read, a necessary read no matter where you sit in terms of gender, faith, or role.

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CW: sexual assault

This is an important book, perhaps even a must-read, for queer folks and allies alike. It is a vulnerable look at the transition journey that Jeremy goes through, starting from when he was quite young to present day. I was very intrigued by the "family memoir" aspect as I have not encountered anything like this before. His parents' reactions to the different stages of his transition were raw and honest, though not always positive. My favorite chapters were from Jeremy's younger brother Sammy's perspective. The book does use Jeremy's dead name and former pronouns up to the point of his transition. His mom does acknowledge this in the beginning of the book, stating that she had wrestled with what to do, but ultimately decided to go this route for clarity's sake.

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I ultimately enjoyed reading this one, and I think it's important for more trans stories to be told. It's to have the perspective of Jeremy's family as well through the book. One of my hang ups was that sometimes it seemed the tense changed between some of the different parts, which threw me off a little, i.e. one part being in more of a present tense and the next more past, but I don't recall exactly where that happened. My main hang up though is the use of Jeremy's deadname throughout the first part of the book. It was acknowledged by the author at the beginning and I'm sure she talked about it with Jeremy, but it still felt hard and not right the more I read it and the more Jeremy was realizing his identity through the book. Overall though, a positive story of a trans person that can surely help other people as well.

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** will add links when it goes live **

Once a Girl, Always a Boy is a marvelous family memoir of a transgender journey, written by Jo Ivester.

This story is an important one. Honest and heart-felt, this look back at Jeremy's journey, told by many standpoints, is wonderfully done. The reader follows Jeremy from his childhood to his 20's.

Jeremy was a tomboy for sure, but it was always more than that. Personally, I love the way his mother related to Jeremy's young years. Of course, this understanding leads to confusion later as Jeremy struggles to understand and explain his true feelings. And, damn, learning more about the journey of Jo herself, is amazing.

The author includes an informative look into the emotions, as well as work and legal struggles involved with changing one's gender legally. It's enlightening, not only for the way Jeremy's plights are explored, but also for the way his parents and siblings each explain their feelings.

I love, love, love this book and hope everyone has a chance to read it. And yes, tears were shed.

Once a Girl, Always a Boy is a book everyone should read. Too many people struggle with understanding why people transition, and this memoir will definitely help people to gain a better understanding. And of course, understanding leads to changing attitudes. I am a firm believer that stories have the power to create change, and this is one such story.

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