Has Anyone Seen My Sex Life?

Pub Date:   |   Archive Date: 14 Feb 2020

Member Reviews

This was a great book with fab characters and some real laugh out loud moments, I thoroughly enjoyed it
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Meg and her husband Danny live in Northern England with their three girls, one newly born. Meg feels like her mojo is lacking until a mysterious package uncovers a long held secret that changes their lives forever. This was a feel good, hysterical book about marriages and the various phases they go through.
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When I first started reading the prologue I wasn't too sure about this book but I'm very pleased I carried on as it is so funny and heartwarming at the same time. We follow the Morton family's' lives through work, school runs and children's parties, and so much more. I can guarantee you'll never think of a Yorkshire mintcake in the same way again.
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Very very funny book! Found myself giggling out loud reading it, and I have to say the storyline didn't take the turn I expected it to. Fun, light hearted and a good read.
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I really liked this book! Meg and Danny have been married for some years and have three daughters in common. One day, Meg receives a big dildo on the post that Danny ordered, and this is the beginning of a lot of missunderstundings, laughing-out-loud moments, but most of all, growing together as a couple and discovering what really matters and what truly makes you happy.

My favorite quote: "Don't cry. Don't cry at work. I stuff two custard creams in my mouth. Geez, I hate custard creams. Chew. Just do something. Why is my mouth so dry? Where is all my saliva? Don't. Choke. I grip on to my desk again. It's stuck. Good god, I'm going to die here with a sex website open on my phone and an economy biscuit stuck in my gullet."

** Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC copy in exchange for my honest opinion **
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Absolutely hilarious! I never found myself bored. The dialog between the characters flowed naturally and I found a lot of it pretty endearing. Baily did an excellent job of capturing that spirit of people who are in love but feel like life has taken over their relationship. The story over all flowed very well. I loved Baily's writing style. There is a sort of ease to it all. As someone from the USA, I struggled a little with a lot of the British pop culture references and slang. Thankfully I have seen quite a few television shows from the UK so I could figure out the majority of it. Internet searches helped a bit, too. 

I would definitely recommend this to anyone who likes a laugh out loud endearing read. I suggest going into it with no expectations and an open mind. 

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the opportunity to read and review this title.
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Eventhough this book wasnt quite what I was expecting I still enjoyed it alot. It was funny in places that it warranted to be.
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such a fun and wonderful book, full of realistic and yet hilarious situations. a must read for all parents and a reality check for all those thinking about parenting!
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If you like your humor with a touch of raunch and a good dose of realism, this is the book for you. Anyone who has been married for a decade or so should relate to Meg or Danny (or both, as I did). I enjoyed the situations they found themselves in, although some of them didn’t feel entirely realistic. But that was okay because even those moved the plot forward naturally. I would recommend this book for not only the laughs but also for  sharp commentary on how easy it is to let things go in the comfort of a long-term marriage. For more thoughts, please visit my blog at Fireflies and Free Kicks Fiction Reviews. Thank you to NetGalley and Bookouture for a pre-release digital ARC of this book.
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I didn't quite know what to expect when I began to read this title, other than the blurb that accompanies it. 

I was very pleasantly surprised at how funny and filthy and fabulous it was. Some of the observations about married life I found to be marvellously spot on!

The characters were engaging and relatable, the plot was convincing and intriguing, and the dialogue was a joy.

This was a delightful find.
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So funny!  Meg and Danny live with their three young children.  Things are jogging along just fine, until one day a surprise package arrives which turns Meg’s life upside down.  A hilarious read - including a trip to A & E after Meg falls through a chest of drawers, and just who is Captain Mintcake????  Really great and entertaining read
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Kristen Bailey
Has Anyone Seen My Sex Life? 

DNF /DNR
Didn't feel to finished this book, probably cant relate. 

Thank you NetGalley for this arc.
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Oh my goodness! This has got to be one of my favourite books! It is absolutely hilarious so many times I kept bursting out laughing, honestly it is so good! So many of us will be able to relate to this. Such an easy to read book that you will just devour in one sitting it is impossible to put it down.
This is the first I have read from this author and it certainly won’t be the last, I can’t wait to read the next book! The way things are going she will definitely become a favourite author of mine.
Blooming marvellous!
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Has anyone seen my sex life?" made me laugh out loud not once but several times, and while it's not a mystery, it has a bigger twist than several thrillers I've read. I don't think anyone could have guessed what was inside that parcel that was delivered in the mail
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Has Anyone Seen My Sex Life by Kristen Bailey is a hilarious romp on modern family life with all ups and downs weaved between all of the hilarious moments between Meg and Danny as they navigate their way through marriage, kids and a new found secret passion that will have you laughing out loud as you flip through the pages.

I always know when I am reading a great book when not even ten pages in and I am laughing my ass off. I do have to say, I don’t read enough comedy in books and Kristen Bailey has shown me why I need to be adding more into my reading life. I can’t even count all of the times I burst out laughing. A few times, I laughed so hard my cat jumped out of his bed scared out of his mind and giving me an evil look for disturbing his sleep. He will get over it!

From the title, I am sure you are guessing there is a lot of sex talk in this story and you would be right! It is not over the top…..okay well, maybe it is! But, it is all in good fun and there are a lot of jokes thrown in the mix. This is definitely not a book for anyone who gets offended easily when it comes to sex and marriage.

I can’t even begin to express just how much I loved Meg and Danny. The banter between them is hilarious and you can see the love they have for one another as they navigate having kids, sex and life in general. Plus, there is a big secret that gets revealed that really takes a spin in the story. I definitely could not wait to see how it would play out.

Besides all the funny parts of this story it also adds a lot of realness to it as well especially when it comes to Meg. Meg has a vulnerability to her after having kids and not having the body like she did while in her twenties. It is definitely a topic that is relatable to most women as they get older where one may feel all the goodies are going South for the winter! Heh!

If you love a good laugh out loud story full of heart, love and banter and are not afraid to be that crazy person in public laughing like a total maniac, then this is definitely the book for you! I highly recommend this wonderful story!
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How can you not fall just a little bit in love with a man who fondly nicknames his daughters ‘Buttons’ and ‘Dimples’? That’s how I feel about Danny Morton! He is adorable!

He also happens to love his wife Meg – in that manly way that Northerners have. They don’t exactly tell you, but they do try and show you as much as you’ll allow them to, and when time permits, between 3 young children, work, family, exhaustion etc. etc. But Meg isn’t a Northerner. She’s a Southerner and even though she’s lived in Danny’s neck of the woods for quite some time now, she’s still not quite got the hang of things, like some of the strange expressions they use. She’s not part of the ‘in’ crowd – they all grew up together and she wasn’t around for all that shared history.

So it’s not surprising that she’s feeling a bit unloved and mumsy and suspects that Danny might not fancy her much any more. Things reach breaking point at the worst possible time (actually when is it a good time for things to fall apart?). It’s Danny’s dad’s birthday and Danny’s younger brother Stu is arriving after 18 months away from home, being a good-time boy! The entire family is having an extended celebration. Meg is convinced that her marriage is over and is seriously on the verge of cracking up. She knows things have been shaky, but wasn’t that just because they’re both so tired all the time; so busy; so chaotic? She doesn’t want to lose the warmth of the close-knit family that she adores. So what is she going to do about it?

This is an absolutely delightful, laugh-out-loud hilarious read! It does come with an advisory that should be glaringly obvious from the title: it’s definitely not for anyone who tends towards the prudish! This is full-on, in-your-face, with no-holds-barred!! This is a family that doesn’t hold back. They say it like it is – and lucky for us readers, the results are downright funny!

Kristen Bailey certainly has a way with her writing. I know that creating a book and bringing it to life from start to finish isn’t easy, but she gives the impression that when she sits down and decides what she wants to write about, it all just flows out onto the page! The way she depicts the hectic life of a typical family with small kids is spot-on. Eve in particular, is a real bundle of ‘ohmygoodness!’ What she only comes up with! She’s a book all on her own!

It’s a 5-star read, for those who are willing to keep their minds open and who don’t mind snorting their chosen beverages through their noses!
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Funny and very true to life for any parent of small kids. Good for a quick read before bed or waiting in a queue. Nothing deep to it, which can be nice.
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*4.5 Stars*

Has Anyone Seen My Sex Life was quirky Women’s fiction that revolved around Meg and Danny’s married sex life and lot of sex related things but definitely not erotica or a pure romance. It was about uncertainty and questions related to sex life after marriage and kids, rekindling sex life, professional unhappiness, and honest portrayal of sex and how it’s different for everybody.

Now I’m really scratching my head how I should say and how much I should say. There was lot of things in this book. At first I thought it might be a chick-lit or about betrayal or rekindling love but it was much more than that.

It started with Meg receiving a shock in the morning when something arrived in the post that belonged to her husband that changed her life and views. What was it and if her doubt was right or not, was revealed pretty quickly, within first 30% of the book. I’m pretty sure you cannot figure out what was in the box and what was the truth behind it or what Meg will do about it and what happens in the end.There was hilarity in every single chapter. This book defines what laugh-out-loud is, from the very beginning.

Writing was fabulous, gripping and so lovely with varied characters, couples and gossips. Setting of Kendal, Lake District in northern part of the UK made it more entertaining with its close-knit community where everybody knows everybody’s business. I loved characters, family dynamics and even school moms. I rooted for Meg and Danny pretty quickly. I loved Meg more and her voice had a charm that made me to stick with her story and thoughts throughout the book.

Meg was amazing partner and mom. Her sacrifices and love for her family were great to read. When she did her research and found about many other things that might question if she even know her husband, I really felt sad for her. No wife deserves that but oh my, that scene later in bedroom and hospital made me forget all that. Her reaction to the truth was so natural and real. I could feel her insecurity, self-doubt and vacillation. It was not easy for her to clear her mind and see it from Danny’s perspective and when she heard opinions of her sister, best friend and cleared the fog with Danny, she was back to herself. She found a new knowledge and new spark.

Danny was such a nice and well written character. I had my doubts like Meg, but he turned out really amazing. He was a great father, son, brother and husband, I get what he did and why and still I feel he shouldn’t keep it secret and for that I was holding back my likeness. I like how he explained things, his hobby and all the things he did. He didn’t voice it earlier out loud but one can see and feel unhappiness in his professional life. His worry, anxiousness, and love was realistic. I had trouble understanding at first but I loved what he decided at the end and I agreed with Meg.

Stu, Danny’s brother was not easy to like but he surprised me at the end. And I have to say he took the entertainment to upper level. School moms and their gossips was hilarious. Some were friends while some were always at each other’s neck, bitching about other moms and that cat fight in the end was so funny. It all says a lot about how people let out their suppressed feelings and unhappiness on other, finding fault in other person and their life.

I loved Danny and Meg’s girls. They were charming. I can see my girl turn out like Eve! 😅 Emotions and feelings of the characters were well written. Even serious and sad moments were given the touch of humor.

There was lot of sex talk so if you are prim and prudish, just be prepared. You will see lot of sex trinkets, different sex life of different couple, threesome, toesome, wild and adventurous, hook ups… and many sex terminology and synonyms of body parts. To be honest it was all so informative.

I loved the message in the book. It say a lot about people’s mentality towards erotica and art related to it, how people jump to assumptions and think the worst about the person behind any sex related act. It told what love is, what sex is and how it can be different for everybody. It showed a difference between sexual exploration and perverseness.

Climax was uncertain. I was not sure what they will do about this Danny’s secret. I guessed it a little and I was only 20% right about it but anyway it was good to see how they all solved their problems and doubts.

Why 4.5-

I have to say I had little difficulty in understanding some terms and British phrases that slowed the pace, as I was doing lot of googling. Of course it wasn’t difficult to get the idea.

Overall, it was hilarious, entertaining, and enjoyable women’s fiction with a unique and quirky topic. I recommend to all readers of this genre.0=
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(I'm so sorry for the 2* rating but you can't post a review without rating the book)

I've tried so hard to like the book, I even got to almost 30% of it but I'm really having difficulty to understand most of the slang used in this book. I believe it's actually funny but I feel like it was written only to the Brit people :( 
I loved the title, and the synopsis, but that's just it. Sorry :(
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Favorite Quotes:

Nothing is more sobering than looking at yourself in your underwear under a fluorescent bathroom glow. My stomach looks like a collapsed cake. My thighs look like rolled pork joints. I poke at them to see if I can carve out a thigh gap… I look down. Jesus, where are my boobs and stomach going? It’s like they’re trying to flee from me in different directions – gravity is not my friend.

I have a Morton brother either side of me: my brother-in-law to my left, to my right my husband, who keeps adjusting the tartan gown to protect my modesty… ‘Careful there, Meggers. Don’t need the whole world seeing your growler…’ I laugh hysterically at the mention of the word and do a lion impression.

She told people I had implants put in me arse. Who the heck wants their bum to look bigger?

‘There’s no such thing as heaven,’ Eve informs me. ‘ He’s just dust now and his dog ghost lives in the hills and will gallop around and sleep in the bushes scaring the squirrels.’


My Review:

I smirked, giggle-snorted, and barked with gleeful mirth throughout this cleverly penned and superbly crafted tale.  This was my first exposure to the beguilingly wondrous wit of Kristen Bailey and I became a rabid fangirl halfway through page one.  Her engaging writing style was crisp, rib-tickling, rife with smart edgy banter and humorous innuendo, and called up delightfully amusing visuals that danced behind my eyes.   I am greedy for all her past and future words and have added her name to the top of my List Of Favorite Cool Beings.
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