Thank you to Netgalley and Dundurn Press for an e-copy of this book.

I adored this look into grief and the effects it can have. I loved the setting on a secluded Mexican island. It really captured the isolation that can be found in your grief.

I adored the friendships and the intricacies of them.

And the writing was just amazing.

4.5 stars rounded up!

Coen Caraway is waiting for his fiancé Elias to arrive in Mexico at the hotel where they plan to get married within the week. Then, the news arrives that the commercial airliner that Elias was co-piloting crashed into the ocean and that all 300+ people aboard are presumed dead. To make it worse, the last thing heard over the radio was Elias saying a mysterious phrase. People begin the suspect that Elias may have made the plane crash. Coen can't believe that Elias would purposely crash the plane but through a series of flashbacks, we realize that Coen may not know Elias very well.

This was an emotional ride! I really felt Coen's pain and his need to carry-on despite this upheaval in his plans. He feels guilt and confusion over the loss of his love and the perception of Elias held by the rest of the world. His friends and family question Coen on how he is processing his grief, but Coen insists on doing things his own way.

I read this one in less than a day. The book was loaded with emotional suspense, so I wouldn't quite call it a thriller, but it still had me on the edge of my seat to see how things would turn out.

I received this book for free via NetGalley in exchange for an honest critique.

I had not heard of the book or the author before coming across the this LGBTQ+ title while “browsing” through NetGalley. It was a quick read, but not for any luck of substance, quite the opposite. There was a great mix of universal truths and “home truths” along the way, many heartbreaking moments, often leavened with hard-won humor, and some interesting twists along the way. Ultimately, I would say that this book about death offers up a lot of needed hope, and I look forward to reading more from this author.

This book completely destroyed me. It never left my hands over the two days it took me to read it. Actually, that's a lie. I briefly put it down every time I went to grab a tissue. The complex nature of the relationship between Elias and Coen was so beautifully written that I have to applaud Boudal Tan for the utterly gorgeous work. When reading any piece of fiction, I always look for realism and whether I can really see certain situations happening or people acting a particular way. Each character in After Elias had their flaws and that's what I loved so much about it. It's such a truly compelling story that I will recommend to everyone.

Thank you to Dundurn Press and NetGalley for the free ARC of the book in exchange for this honest opinion.
On its face, the novel is about grief Coen (the main character) experiences about Elias' death. But it's also about Coen's other grief (of which we learn closer to the end of the book). And it's also about grief other people experience. (I counted at least two others characters who deal with grief, but can easily see that list growing). What starts as a novel about emotions, ends up also as a mystery that gets solved by the end of the book. Even though I'm a gay male, I don't personally relate to Coen or his reactions. That's the nature of human beings: we are all different. I do appreciate though Coen's desire to find out more about Elias. Which gives a book a nice forward momentum. And I appreciate learning about Coen's past life in the same manner I learn about Elias' -- in retrospective fragments interspersed with Coen's current moments. This is a solid book worth a try!

What a powerful book. The aftermath for those left behind...the anguish on the page. I will be thinking of this book for a long time. This is a must read!!!

This was an interesting story and I really enjoyed reading it.

Coen and Elias are engaged to be married, but one week before the wedding, Elias crashes a plane that he was piloting. Coen is numb with grief, but rather than return straight home to his friends and family in Vancouver, he decides to turn what would be their wedding in Mexico into a celebration of Elias’s life. But how much did Coen really know about his husband-to-be? What was a tragic event, turned into a mission of both self-discovery and a look into Elias’s past and what shaped him into the man he became.

Though I did enjoy this book, I was a bit bothered by Coen’s lack of emotion when he heard Elias had died. I know everyone mourns in their own way, but it seemed like more than just numbness in his case. It was as if he wasn’t really addressing that Elias was even gone and was trying to stay upbeat about the whole situation. I think his friends and family were right to be worried about him. I am glad that in time he did eventually express some emotion, otherwise this book wouldn’t have sat well with me at all.

Luckily I still found this to be a great book overall!

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3463944332

Thank you to NetGalley and Stephanie Ellis at Dundurn Press for sending me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Despite a strained start, Eddy Boudel Tan delivers a powerful character-focused story examining the intricacies of grief, love, and relationships in this impressive debut novel.

Coen Caraway and Elias Santos are due to marry in a week - however, the airplane piloted by Elias has just gone down in tragedy. We follow Coen as he deals with suspicions alongside his own grief on the Mexican island that was meant to host their wedding.

Despite this fantastic premise, it took me a while to get into the story. The reader is drip-fed information which motivated me to keep on reading. Coen has a rather unusual way of handling his initial grief which did require me to suspend my disbelief at times. Some POV shifts are jarring and the alternating timelines seem disjointed, but these are compensated by Tan's lyrical prose. Beautifully poetic lines are interspersed throughout the novel, particularly in the latter half. The novel features strong imagery, of which I found the Peter Pan references and symbolism of magnolias particularly compelling.

Complicated family dynamics, trauma, and mental illness are dealt with in a tactful yet raw manner. The power of honesty, love, and friendship are evocatively portrayed. I really appreciate the strong bonds between Coen's friends and wish we got to see more of Decker and Gabriel. The complex relationship between Coen and his brother is handled impressively and I was rooting for Clark's redemption arc. I rarely find books set primarily in Mexico, so this offered an interesting perspective - I think there was room for more exploration of the briefly mentioned Aztec mythology. As we learned about Elias' backstory, I would have liked to learn more about Elias and Coen's relationship dynamics.

I would like to note that there are some content / trigger warnings to be aware of before diving into this novel.

In all, I really enjoyed this novel and thoroughly recommend it! I look forward to reading more from Eddy Boudel Tan and wish him the best of luck for the release in September.

While AFTER ELIAS has an interesting premise, the main character's behavior in reaction to his partner's death was so bizarre that I simply didn't find it believable.

Thank you to Netgalley! Despite its rocky departure, ‘After Elias’ finds air to soar into a smooth landing.

Despite its fantastic premise, Boudel Tan releases too much steam early on as he gets lost on unfocused tangents that ultimately contribute little to the main story. Transitions between past and present narratives and sudden POV shifts are clunky. The story is ambitious; it’s challenging to orient to a specific theme or tone because pertinent details dribble out in sometimes confusing ways.

Though I felt like I was grappling with the novel’s identity for the first two thirds, Boudel Tan manages such sharp clarity in the third act. Practically out of nowhere, the pieces come together and Boudel Tan’s intention develops with potency. Many of the seemingly disparate concepts tie together into a unified purpose.

If you’re willing to hang on, you’ll find a heartfelt and satisfying conclusion that makes some of the earlier turbulence worth it.

I requested this book from NetGalley for the cover alone. I am really into airplanes and more specifically their crashes. While that plays a factor in this book, this is more centered around a man's journey to find out more about the person he loved. I was a bit wishy washy on this book for a lot of it, just because I felt Coen was a bit unbelievable with his interactions with others, but when they went looking for Elias' family is when I couldn't put the book down.

While I don't think I will remember this book a few months from now, it was an enjoyable read

* Disclaimer: I received a copy of this novel from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. *

Coen Caraway was all set to marry Elias Santos on an beautiful island in Mexico, only to have his world come crashing down when Elias dies in a plane crash. A plane he was piloting. What comes next is a journey of healing, learning more about Elias, and learning how to forgive those around him.

The story was heartbreaking and lovely. This is one of those stories that hits you in the feels and doesn’t let go. It is definitely a story that I’ll read over again and again. The characters are wonderful and very relatable. It’s hard NOT to feel the pain they are experiencing.

I was sure I'd love the book, and I'm sorry I didn't. The topic, the setting, and foremost the writing is beautiful. What I was missing was any connection to the characters, especially Coen, the main. I fail to explain why - it just was from start on. Sometimes it is that way - we all know that.
2 stars for the writing

Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for giving me the opportunity to read the book!

What are these feelings? They have no name.

Thank you so much Netgalley and the publisher for allowing me to read this book before its release in exchange of a review.

I picked up this book because it sounded heart wrenching and bittersweet, and it was just that, but in a very unexpected way.

We follow Coen, a man who lost the love of his life and fiancée in an airplane crash few days before their wedding and we see how we tries to cope with grief in his own way.

But then, many truths started coming out to surface and they’re just devastating, I won’t talk about them because feel that each person should discover them by themselves while reading it.

The book book covers dark themes such as death, depression, guilt and regret and while it ends in a higher note, I still felt really conflicted with my feelings when it ended.

Definitely, a story that stands out for its amount of emotions.

Most authors, especially debuts, go to great lengths to fully describe the physical characteristics of their characters and the location where the story takes place. Yet, Eddy Boudel Tan seems to sidestep these descriptions but never leaves the reader guessing. He gives you everything you need to know with the emotion his words instill.

Tan's characters are fully formed and flawed, and you will (at least I did) alternate between loving and hating them. This story is beautiful and sad, and you will laugh and cry, and really, who can ask for more?

Thank you to NetGalley, and the publisher for this early peek at what is bound to be a hit.

This a debut book that drips with melancholy and dread. Intentionally so I might say. Though, to Tan's credit there is also some levity, and love flickering within the darkness. Hope and healing are just beneath the surface, and for much of the novel they are out of Coen Caraway's reach. You see, he's just lost the love of his life, his life line, in a deadly plane crash. Mere days before their wedding. And for many of the days after he is adrift in a sea of sorrows and self-loathing. We see him through all of this. We see him come to reconcile who he was to Elias, who Elias was to him, and who he will be after Elias. It's a suffocating thing, being with Coen has he goes through such a profound grief, but as the novel concluded I was glad to have gone on the journey Tan mapped out for me. It ended up being incredibly cathartic and left me feeling hopeful in a way I can't quite put into words.

Many thanks to Dundurn Press for an advanced reader copy, and much luck to Tan on the upcoming release!

This is a very thoughtful book- parts of it are inestimably sad and parts hold out hope.

The ideal wedding in the ideal location will be perfection, until the groom plunges into the sea with a planeload of passengers. Not only is the grief of such a loss at the pinnacle of hopes of a new beginning, the suspicion that the groom was somehow responsible for the crash, changes the tragedy into crime.
But what is true, what was true?

When the other groom asks the guests to come anyway, layers of relationships and truths begin to unfold. Some are expected, others turn out to be very surprising. At the end, some explanations are provided, others are left as questions.

What made this an excellent book was the clarity of the author about how feelings can so easily become twisted into truths that are not true at all. Drinking the Kool Aid becomes easier, going along to get along. Until it can't continue that way and something explodes.
What I envy was the chance some of the characters have to really be honest with one another and to forge a more true relationship.

There is tremendous sadness here, but also compassion and some resolution for them at the end.

At once both touching and suspenseful, After Elias tells the story of a man left at the altar in the worst possible way. Coen's fiance, Elias Santos, is killed when the plane he was piloting crashes only days before their wedding. And to add horror to the grief, there are those who believe Elias may have purposely flown himself and the 300+ passengers on board to .their deaths.
Despite the sorrowful context, the prose in this novel is vivid and sensuous, taking full advantage of the setting on a small idyllic island off Mexico, where Coen and Elias were meant to be wed. Eddy Boudel Tan's writing is so evocative, he had me not just seeing every magnolia flower as it blossomed, but catching the scent of them too,
Maybe this is what distracted me from anticipating the many cleverly crafted reveals. I didn't see even one of them coming..
Many thanks to Dundurn and Netgalley for providing me with this advance copy in return for an unbiased review.

Also here: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/3416934654

While waiting for Elias to come to Mexico for their wedding, Coen hears a newscast that the plane Elias is captaining has crashed into the Arctic Ocean. Coen decides to hold the gathering anyway, as a celebration of Elias’ life.

As he sorts through and confronts his memories, Coen’s friends and family are by his side. They help Coen confront his own demons, as well.

The writing was beautiful, breathtaking at times. Descriptions of people and settings were stunning. The storyline was nicely done, too. Character development was well done, and mental illness was explored with tact and honesty. Coen was a well drawn character, but he was a little too selfish and whiny by the end of the book. It was also tied up a little too neatly, after such a messy, complex story.

This was a tough one to rate. I didn't really like the main character, Coen, but the story was interesting. Elias was mysterious and his story was enough to pull the book along. I do love an unreliable narrator, but just couldn't quite get there with Coen.