Stuart Getty's 'How to They/Them' is a fun, concise, sometimes witty primer on the use of the singular 'they', its history, and some associated identities. I think there are a lot of readers that could benefit from reading this, and the cute drawings add a lot of enjoyment.

I think Getty has done a great job of breaking down some of the aspects that can be confusing to some, and I am grateful that they opened up about their own story and identity so that others can learn. I especially liked the history of non-binary identities and vocabulary, and feel that it was just the right length.

Note: I received a free eBook copy of 'How to They/Them' in exchange for an honest review.

This Non-Fiction was everything I wanted it to be, but nothing more. In it Stuart Getty gives a nice introduction to the world of gender fluidity.
They start from square one with the important information on the difference between “The Big Three”: Sex Assigned at Birth, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation. This was a good way to start because this differentiation is where the difficulties in understanding this entire concept usually originate. I thought, it was quite easy to follow because Getty didn’t concern themself with going into too much detail at once. The pages are structured in a way that they don’t contain too much text and are accompanied by cute little illustrations that sometimes furthered the point and sometime just made me smile. In general, it kind of felt like a picture book for children and I was enjoying myself immensely reading it, even though sometimes the book felt a bit condescending (e.g. pretty much in the beginning it says: “Try it together now: T H + E Y. It’s literally that easy. For your mouth. But your brain – well, that’s a little harder. Don’t worry. I got you.”) Those who are picking up this book probably already want to educate themselves and being treated as if I was too dumb to even say the word “they” sort of peeved me.
Anyway, Getty continues with a chapter about the grammar of using nonbinary pronouns, which was what I was most interested in, because I wasn’t too sure, in which way they were supposed to be used: Do you say “they is…” or “they are…”? Do you say “they looked at themself…” or “they looked at themselves…”? After reading this book those questions are definitely answered, so I’m glad I was given the chance to educate myself.
After those general facts, in the last chapter Getty got into talking about some other “fun stuff (and some not-fun stuff)” like the history of the pronoun “they”, “things that suck for GNC folks” and some tips on what to do if someone is using the wrong pronouns etc. I liked that part as well, since it gives some practical advice on how to react if you get to know somebody from the queer community.
So, like I said, the book did what I expected it to do – and it is really important that books like this exist to educate people in an easy and accessible way – but I didn’t always love its execution. Also, while the linguistic part of this was quite interesting, unfortunately my native language isn’t English, so that I’m not quite sure if I will ever get the chance to actually apply my knowledge. I’ll just have to do my best to transfer it to my native language.

This was a quick read but absolutely packed with valuable information. I loved it! The tone is super-friendly, and the author and illustrator are coming from a place of love and generosity, not judgment. There are etiquette tips (including how to apologize when you get the lingo wrong). There are suggestions for how we should all go forward and make the world safe and hospitable for humans of any gender identity. There is a fascinating section about non-binary identities throughout history, all over the world. I, too, want to live in a world where the TSA is not punching a pink button or blue button that tells the machine which part of our anatomies it should scan. How creepy.

Thanks to NetGalley for providing this copy to review.

Representation: Genderqueer author, all about nonbinary pronouns

This book gives an easy to follow guide for using they/them pronouns, like it says in the title. This book does that, but it also talks about gender expression, the freedom to identify how you want, all along with funny visuals. I want to be clear on that part, this is not a graphic novel. Images are accompanied with blocks of text (similar to how Queer: A Graphic History by Meg-John Barker and Julia Scheele is written). Getty is genderqueer and uses they/them personally.

Rating: 4/5 My initial rating was a three out of five stars for a few reasons, but I later changed it to a four. One was just personal, I didn’t really learn anything reading this. After thinking about it, I realized that’s not a fair rating because this is a subject I know well. I use they pronouns myself, so I already have this knowledge. Another reason why I initially gave a lower rating was that when I finished, I was a little frustrated and disappointed because the formatting is HORRIBLE. I understand that this is an ARC, so things likely aren’t completely final yet. It’s also an ebook, and that can sometimes contribute to formatting problems, especially when there are a lot of images throughout the text. However, I could also tell some of the unusual formatting was intentional, which is fine! I just struggled to separate what was intentional and what wasn’t, and it was very frustrating to follow the text sometimes. I’m sure the final version will look better than the copy I read, and I would definitely recommend this to anyone who is wanting to understand they/them pronouns more. I think I might be ordering a physical copy of the final edition so I can see for myself, and so I can share with people.

How to They/ Them is a book that covers the basics of gender, gender identity and how that intersects with language. If you know a lot about the topic it won't tell you anything new, but honestly its still worth it because this book is so funny. I spent half the time I was reading this book taking pictures of the pages because they made me laugh so much. I think that is a great book to give people who are interested in learning more about the non-binary/gender non conforming/ genderqueer identities, but this is maybe not for people who don't want to listen anyway because they would likely get annoyed at the first couple (very funny) pages. If you have some spare time definitely check it out! Thanks to Netgalley and Sasquatch books for this book in exchange for an honest review.

This was a very good beginner's guide to using they/them pronouns, and I know that a LOT of people will gain so much from this.

As someone who uses they/she pronouns, and is still getting used to feeling comfy in "them", this was a really validating read. I personally felt a bit overwhelmed by certain parts, but not in a bad way, just in an... AH way? It's hard to explain. But it made me feel okay in being as flexible or rigid as I want, and it made me feel more okay with this - which, really, is all you can ask for from this kind of text.

I also appreciated the light-hearted tone and art style. Especially the bits with fun flowcharts!

However, I did occasionally find the humor to be a bit grating on a personal level; I can't say if this is because I still feel a tad sensitive around the topic, or if it wasn't my thing, or if it came off as ever so slightly condescending... But, please, don't let that turn you away from this read. For certain readers, the tone will be perfect. It just sometimes missed the mark for me.


This review can also be found on my Goodreads, @fictional.frances. Shortly, I may also post this on my Instagram, @fictional.frances, too.

Perfect!
They/Them 101.
Easy to read, articulate and witty.
Great for kids, adults, queers....EVERYONE.
Just read it!

I found this book on NetGalley on a perfect timing. I had already been looking for more information about nonbinary gender and terms, and found in it a great opportunity to finally fulfill this goal.

The best part of this books is that is really didatic. If you know nothing about the matter or if you have just started to do some research on the theme, this book is just perfect for you (as it was for me). But I dare say that, even if you are already more informed, it can be great to reflect on how to deal with some tricky situations, and how to explain nonbinary to people who are still either not aware of its existence, feeling difficulty to aprehend the concept, or even unwilling to open up their minds.

Also, Stuart makes it clear that it's a serious and delicate matter, that needs to be held up with respect, but their way of explaining is funny and witty, and I found myself smiling a lot during this read. The illustrations and diagramation only add to those feelings.

The concept of nonbinary matches my view and beliefs on the topic of gender, and after reading this book I definitely embraced it.

I want to thank NetGalley, the authors and the publishers for allowing me to read the ARC in exchange for this honest review.

Thank you to Netgalley for providing me with a review copy.

How to They/Them provides a brief history of gender neutral pronouns, people who use them, and provides advice for people who aren't familiar or comfortable with the usage of those pronouns. It also weaves in Stuart Getty's personal journey and experience with gender, which is handled very well because it doesn't take over the educational portions of the book but gives readers someone real to apply the concepts to. I think this book is cute, fun, and manages to explain a lot without really falling into condescending territory. The graphics add some levity and aren't too distracting.

I think this is a relatively niche book, but that's totally okay! As a non-binary person going about my life, I've noticed that the majority of the people who can't quite get the hang of gender neutral pronouns are of an older generation. There are a lot of references, jokes, and slang used in this book that those people aren't going to get, so I probably wouldn't provide this as a resource for, say, my 90 year old grandfather. I would, however, give this to a peer who's maybe struggling a little bit to adjust to my pronouns. It seems geared towards people who really want to understand non-binary identities, people who are probably already on the way to that understanding and just need a bit of a push, and I think that this book is a pretty good recommendation for those people!

It's also important to acknowledge that because it's a short book with lots of graphics, and because it has a personal story attached to it, it's not going to represent every non-binary identity or pronoun perfectly. Stuart does a good job of addressing this and gives their readers the basics in detail, and then slowly and subtly introduces concepts that might be a bit harder to wrap one's head around. This book can't be the ultimate guide to non-binary people or pronouns, but it's a pretty good start.

The dates for All the Books have shifted, and this book is no longer eligible for me to review on the podcast, so I wasn't able to finish/review it.

As a queer educator, I loved this book! I wish it had been around when I was younger. I'm excited to share this with my students! A great, light read, the humor and personal stories made it very impactful, accessible to understand and a fun read!

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this eARC in exchange for an honest review.

This visual guide to non-binary vocabulary and concepts is informative yet light-hearted fun thanks to the humorous voice of the author. I felt educated without being bored or feeling like I was being lectured.

The author, Stuart Getty was Assigned Female at Birth, called herself a lesbian (a butch), before finally hearing the term "they" and now Getty most identifies with this pronoun.

Parts of the book are setup as Q and A sessions with all sorts of questions that people wonder and are fearful to ask, so as not to be rude.

They also provide specific language that parents and teachers can use as well as resources at the end that can be used to further educate oneself on pronouns.

I cannot comment much on the visual aspect as these visuals didn't appear well on my Kindle but this is a great starting point for understanding non-binary pronouns!

I think it's great for kids (6th grade+) and adults alike.

An engaging, entertaining and educational resource on how to use pronouns and why it's important to be conscious of asking. 

This book contains so many useful abbreviations, terms definitions and graphics for those cis allies out there. The term gender fluid sounds so beautiful to me whenever I hear it. I just visualize an ocean wave of every shade of blue ebbing and flowing where the beach never looks the same way twice. No two people are the same or feel the same in their skin, nor should they have to.

I will read anything that will help me to become a more understanding human to other humans experiences. I especially loved the references to other cultures histories this is not new. I've been fascinated by two-spirit history.  I will have to read into the others listed in this book. 

Sexuality didn't used to be so rigid and confined. As always it's ruled and constrained by politics and religion.

I've read others reviews and noticed the gender reveal comment. This is a weird practice and I feel has more to do with baby registries, nursery decorations and gifts than the future of the baby. With our first I asked for all gender neutral because we were having two and I didn't want to have to buy more clothes in case the 2nd was the other gender. My answer while I was pregnant when anyone asked what I wanted a boy or girl "doesn't matter as long as they are healthy!" 

Quote:
"And I’m here to tell you that, sometimes, it is healthiest to cut people off if they won’t change their behavior. My only tip? Do this with a lot of heart. Because it can be rough."

I feel this advice can be said for many reasons.

Thanks NetGalley for the ARC.
"How to They/Them" is a simple and informative guide for the use of the pronouns they/them, written by a they/them user. It explains in a short but very complete way everything you should know about genderqueer, nonbinary and more.
Despite the fact I already knew most of the topics of the book, I found it so useful for everyone, literally everyone. I enjoyed every page, and loved every draw,

As someone who is still questioning their own gender identity, this little book was like a breath of fresh air. Told in a polite manner and very well researched, this book took us through every thing I could think of asking: from the grammar of using they as a singular pronoun to the history of gender-neutral identities in other cultures. I'll be reccomending this book to all my friends who want to educate themselves from now on.

my review will be published on my blog on September 28, in keeping with the publisher's request!
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Stuart Getty has created a wonderful book about They/Them pronouns and all of the bits and pieces that may go with pronouns. Just for transparency, I'm a cisgender woman and don't really have a pronoun preference. I do, however, always respect the pronouns of others. I work in a Library and we have policies about gender-neutral language so it falls within my wheelhouse.

The author, Stuart Getty is a genderqueer writer and filmmaker. If you're interested in short docs, they have a great one entitled "they/THEM" and it is available to watch here. The writing is accompanied by illustrations by graphic artist, Brook Thyng. The illustrations are fun and help to keep the topic open and inviting. From conversations I've had in my own life, I realize that discussing pronouns can bring out a lot of defensiveness in people... what I love about this book is that it is straight-forward without being at all self-righteous.

"How To They/Them" is a book about pronouns...but it's also a lot more than that. Stuart shares their personal journey through life in an endearing and authentic way. This is a journey to using they/them pronouns that begins with a label of "tomboy" feeling comfortable. 

Stuart's story is told with humor, facts, history, and fantastic artwork. The text in the book is often short and straightforward, sometimes amusing, and packs a "clarity" punch. I learned a lot and I thoroughly enjoyed that. All kinds of topics are covered in simple and direct ways in this book: sex, gender, gender binary, gender identity, nature vs. nurture, socialization, genetics (to name a few). I hadn't even thought about some of the issues in this book. For instance, the author points out how early some people begin down the gender path with "gender reveal" parties. I have never liked the idea of them, but I hadn't thought about how that was the beginning of a new and open soul being put into a box!

As an ally, I learned some useful tips for having conversations about pronouns and other related subjects. My favorite? "Cis" is just the opposite of "trans"! how great is that for a response! And some other great advice, "Weird means growth is happening." Maybe that's why it can feel weird for some people to use the pronouns "they/them"... it's certainly another handy thing for me to have in my toolbox.

This is a wonderful book. It would make a great gift. I think that most people could benefit from reading something like this. It's joyful and positive and still manages to inform.

I received an electronic ARC from Sasquatch Books through NetGalley.
Getty shares information and challenges readers to think, grow and learn. They present the history of the pronouns they/them and provide further information on how the binary designations came to be. Well thought out and researched. Presented in a simple to follow style. Readers are offered directions and steps to take to be more inclusive. Getty emphasizes that it takes practice and offers encouragement to keep moving forward.

I first want to thank NetGalley and Sasquatch Books for giving me early, free access to this book in exchange for an honest review.

This book is very accessible. By that I mean, explanations are concise and worded in easy to understand language, often accompanied by examples to make things more concrete and/or illustrations that help keep the tone of the book light. On one reading of "How to They/Them," anyone who is encountering many of the words in this book for the first time will probably not remember the nuanced differences between all of the words. However, the book is short enough and organized in such a way that readers will be able to go back and reread sections later without it feeling like a daunting task.

While a lot of the book may feel like it is addressing people who don't know or understand people who chose 'they/them' as their pronouns, after reading to the end, it actually feels like it is for anyone who wants to know a bit more about not just the use of the singular 'they/them' pronouns but also some bits of history, encouragement to be you, and examples of how any and all of us can make changes to create a more accepting and comfortable world for others.

Getty's compassion for others really comes through throughout the book and their humor makes the text so inviting that it almost feels like sitting down with a friend.

I cant get over my love for this book! As a nonbinary person often looking for resources for coworkers and family, this little book does a fabulous job at explaining various concepts in a very digestible way.

How To They definitely has an odd format but I love it! The book is informative but also so much fun! I believe this book is perfect for all the people who have questions about gender identity and would make a great gift for those less than open-minded family members.
The only thing that bothers me about this book is the use of slang acronyms since I am not very familiar with them.